- Dr. Julia Weiland: An hour ago you were a bowl full of jello.
- Matthew 'Matt' Farragher: Jello? I would never ever be jello. Chocolate pudding? Maybe. Never jello.
- Waitress: You are leaving? Where are you going?
- Matthew 'Matt' Farragher: Oh, for a couple of weeks of fun in the sun with my kids.
- Waitress: Kids? You have kids?
- Matthew 'Matt' Farragher: There's only one thing that's more seductive than cooking for a beautiful woman. That's cooking with her.
- Matthew 'Matt' Farragher: I rent this house for two weeks every summer. It's mine.
- Dr. Julia Weiland: Oh, really? Well, I happen to have a fully executed rental agreement.
- Matthew 'Matt' Farragher: I have one of those. I have one of those too. Not on me, or paramedically sealed in plastic, but I got one.
- Matthew 'Matt' Farragher: Look, I'll make it up to you. I promise.
- Daphne Farragher: Dad, you don't have to make it up to us. Just be there. Be our father.
- Dr. Julia Weiland: Russell is a good man. Solid, reliable.
- Thomas Weiland: Sounds like you meant a car.
- Max Weiland: I like Matt.
- Thomas Weiland: I thought you liked him.
- Dr. Julia Weiland: Matt? Matt's fine. For a few weeks on a vacation. A person like that in real life? You know what, you guys? I'm marrying Russell. I'm not gonna get involved with another man who walks out on his kids.
- Lewis Farragher: Dad said I'm moving in with him in the summer.
- Daphne Farragher: Get it in writing.
- Thomas Weiland: Listen,you'd settle much rather for having your Dad not around than having Russell around.
- Lewis Farragher: Dad, you know this is the only time we spend together.
- Matthew 'Matt' Farragher: No, it's not.
- Lewis Farragher: Dad. Yes, it is. And you know that.
- Matthew 'Matt' Farragher: We've had a great trip, haven't we? I mean, we've had a lot of fun, right?
- Daphne Farragher: Yea. Come here and jump into the stupid ocean and play house for a couple of weeks. And that's supposed to last us for the rest of the year? Why don't you want to be with us Dad?
- Dr. Julia Weiland: Daphne told me about your plans.
- Matthew 'Matt' Farragher: Oh yea. We're going to look for a three-bedroom when we get back. I figure I need the kids around me to keep me in line.
- Matthew 'Matt' Farragher: Tell me that Russell is a turtle or a small hamster.
- Thomas Weiland: Close.