- Detective Alexandra Eames: [to Goren] The way she was making googly eyes at you I thought you were getting through to her.
- Mr. Smythe: Four counts of manslaughter. That's what I get for overestimating the intelligence of a grand jury.
- Detective Alexandra Eames: Just be grateful the D.A. let you off with a plea bargain.
- Mr. Smythe: I don't consider shutting down my website a bargain. All right, Joanie and Chachi, right? This is the last chat I have for them.
- Detective Alexandra Eames: Thank you, you can go do your little dance in Hell now.
- Detective Alexandra Eames: [seeing Goren reading a book written by a suspect] What are you doing, underlining the dirty parts?
- Detective Alexandra Eames: When tourists take a bite of the Big Apple, the apple isn't supposed to bite back.
- Detective Robert Goren: Well, she didn't believe in heaven and hell, so how would she know the devil was massaging her neck?
- Captain James Deakins: Try to curb your enthusiasm.
- Detective Robert Goren: I'll curb it when we get this freak locked in a box.
- [opening title narration]
- Narrator: In New York City's war on crime, the worst criminal offenders are pursued by the detectives of the Major Case Squad. These are their stories.
- Detective Robert Goren: One thing this line of work teaches us is that guys will do anything for love.