Crossing Jordan (2001–2007)

Miguel Ferrer: Dr. Garret Macy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Woody : What do we got?

  Garrett : Well, since they called for a medical examiner and homicide detective, my guess is a body.

  Woody : Is sarcasm a prerequisite for being an ME?

  Garrett : It helps.

• Max : Tough age seventeen. They're right on the brink of being able to tell you to shove it and they know it.

  Macy : That's right. Jordan must have been a handful at that age.

  Max : With Jordan this stage started at eleven.

  Macy : And when did it end?

  Max : I'm still waiting.

• Macy : Jordan, next time you're called for jury duty let your shrink know. I'm sure there's a reason you should be excused.

  Jordan : Wow. Did you mean to call me a nut job or are you just crabby?

• Elaine : [talking about Jordan]  Garret, I'm serious. She is impossible to work with.

  Macy : Here's a tip. It's easier if you don't listen when she talks.

• Macy : Why would you want to have sex six times in one day? I mean, come on, we're people not Bunnies.

  Lily : Dr.Macy said Bunnies.

• Jordan : I have so much energy.

  Macy : Yeah, I can tell. Read your autopsy report. 12 pages to tell us she was hit in the back of the head with an unidentifiable object.

• Jordan : You're not really going to put me on that leash are you?

  Macy : You'd just chew through it.

• Jordan : Is this the part where I'm supposed to apologize too?

  Garrett : Didn't want to ask the impossible.

• Jordan : Hey, you think the gift shop sells mittens?

  Macy : I thought you were done complaining.

  Jordan : As soon as I'm done freezing!

• Woody : The last four times Burnham met him was at some Goth club named Asmanties.

  Garrett : Goth club huh? Let Nigel do all the talking.

• Dr. Nigel Townsend : I paid seven homeless people to go dumpster diving for me.

  Macy : Who's money did you use?

  Dr. Nigel Townsend : Yours.

• Jordan : Garret, have you gotten any recently?

  Macy : Pardon me?

  Jordan : You heard me. How long has it been?

  Macy : We are not having this conversation.

• Macy : I really don't like you.

  DA Rene Walcott : Right back at you.

  Macy : I mean not at all.

  DA Rene Walcott : I get it. Just kiss me.

• [Lily has just bought a sandwich] 

  Garrett : Tofurkey?

  Lily : Yeah. Fake turkey. Want some?

  Garrett : I'd rather eat sand.

• [talking about Nigel's happiness on a freezing day] 

  Macy : If only we could harness that hot energy.

  Jordan : Yeah, Either that or we could just set his desk on fire.

• Macy : Nobody knows what kind of parent they'd make until it's too late to back out.

• Macy : Dead men do tell tales, I guess.

• Macy : Get your coat.

  Dr. Peter Winslow : But it's pouring!

  Macy : We're like the post office. Neither rain, nor sleet...

• Macy : You okay, man?

  Dr. Peter Winslow : Yeah. I'm just not used to working on bodies that are still bleeding.

• Macy : Well... three dead people, three different guns, three fatal bullet wounds. A shoots B, B shoots C, C shoots A.

  Jordan : Commutative Property of Murder.

• [Rene is pregnant, and just telling Garrett] 

  DA Rene Walcott : We met for a drink...

  Garrett : And one thing led to a mother?

• Macy : [holding up a stethoscope from Jordan's days as a Thoracic Surgery resident]  You still talk to God through this thing?

  Jordan : Naw, we e-mail now.

• [Jordan's going out on a date] 

  Macy : Word of advice: try not to sabotage things before dessert.

• Jordan : Garret Macy. Are you actually telling me to keep crusading?

  Macy : As if you would ever do what I tell you to do.

• Macy : We should all sort out our personal demons before having children.

• Woody : It's Jordan, isn't it? This trial would be over by now if she wasn't in there poking holes.

  Macy : That'd be my guess.

  Woody : Jordan being Jordan.

• Macy : That was stupid and reckless what you did, you know that? You don't listen to me.

  Jordan : Come on, Garret.

  Macy : You do what you want. And if you hadn't this time, those boys wouldn't be alive now.

  Jordan : All in a days work. No big deal.

  Macy : I'm still your boss and I'm telling you it was a big deal. Own it. I don't know what I would have done if something had happened to you.

• Garrett : You ready for this?

  Jordan : Yeah... Look at me man, I am a vision of authority. I'll just order the keg and line up the togas.

• [Peter is autopsying a morbidly obese man] 

  Macy : Now that's what I call a pancreas.

• Garrett : Woody...

  Woody : Ahh!

  Garrett : I think it's time you cut down on the java.

  Woody : I think it's time you quit sneaking up on people!

• Dr. Stiles : Depressed?

  Macy : About what?

  Dr. Stiles : Oh, I don't know. Anything - life, love, public transportation...

• Macy : After three years, we might beat Miami.