Clive Owen credited as playing...
Charles Schine
- Philippe LaRoche: [Holding Charles against a wall] Man, you ended up in the wrong prison, Charlie!
- Charles Schine: LaRoche...
- Philippe LaRoche: [smugly] Yeah?
- Charles Schine: I CHOSE this prison.
- [Schine stabs LaRoche with Winston's shank]
- Charles Schine: I'll bet you $20 that I can kiss you without ever touching your lips.
- Lucinda Harris: Kiss me?
- Charles Schine: Without touching.
- Lucinda Harris: [skeptical] How?
- Charles Schine: What do you mean, how? That's the bet.
- Lucinda Harris: Okay. Let me see the twenty.
- [Schine takes out the $20, which Lucinda puts on the bar. She looks at him invitingly]
- Charles Schine: [leans in slowly, and softly kisses her, taking her breath away] Worth every penny.
- Winston Boyko: Hey Chaz, you know what my favorite song is? "Get Money", B.I.G, Lil' Kim. My favorite artists, Eddie Money, Al Green and Johnny motherfuckin' Cash, baby. Oh, lemme tell you, my favorite Reverends, Frederick Price and Creflo Dollar.
- Charles Schine: Yes, Winston. I have your money.
- Winston Boyko: Who's talking money here, Chaz? Just trying to make conversation, man.
- Winston Boyko: Hey Chaz, you feeling ok?
- Charles Schine: Yeah, I'm ok.
- Winston Boyko: You sure? You look like you comin' down with that bug or somethin'.
- Charles Schine: It's nothing.
- Winston Boyko: Nothing? That's what Dick Lumberg said.
- Charles Schine: Who's Dick Lumberg?
- Winston Boyko: Nobody. That mother fucker's dead!
- Charles Schine: Please, just take the money.
- Philippe LaRoche: Chuck, I already took your money. You see this? This was your money, and I took it. Now it's mine.
- Charles Schine: She's a bitch.
- Eliot Firth: She's the worst kind of bitch... she actually has a point.
- Charles Schine: Eliot, I'm in trouble.
- Eliot Firth: What kind of trouble?
- Charles Schine: I cheated on Deanna.
- Eliot Firth: You never cheated before?
- Charles Schine: No.
- Eliot Firth: Everybody cheats, Charles and you know what? Everybody gets over it.
- Charles Schine: No, this is different.
- Eliot Firth: Everybody says it's different too. Don't worry you'll be fine...
- Charles Schine: There's this man...
- Eliot Firth: -I don't wanna know who it was with.
- [Charles sighs]
- Eliot Firth: Buy Deanna some flowers, talk it over with her, try not to get caught next time. Now, for God's sakes would you help me fix this piece of crap?
- Charles Schine: How'd you get this number?
- Philippe LaRoche: That's it. Keep thinking like that. How did I get your cell number? It isn't listed, is it?
- Charles Schine: You called my wife?
- Philippe LaRoche: Ah, no. Guess again. Okay, I'll give you a clue. On this phone, it's speed dial number eight. Hospital one, doctor two. You're number EIGHT!
- [LaRoche laughs]
- Philippe LaRoche: You don't even rate in the top five. How does that feel, Charlie?
- [Schine glances at his caller ID and sees 'Home' in the display]
- Dexter: So you write commercials, huh?
- Charles Schine: Yeah.
- Dexter: I made this demo for this coffee commercial this one time. It was a fine piece of music.
- Charles Schine: Really?
- Dexter: Yeah.
- Charles Schine: What'd they say?
- Dexter: They said people who drink coffee don't like rap.
- Charles Schine: That's ridiculous.
- Dexter: That's what I said.
- Philippe LaRoche: [about the mugging] Oh. Well, from what Charles told me, that thug had a jump on him from the very start. This is crazy. You never had a chance, did you?
- Charles Schine: Oh, I'm gonna get him back.
- Deanna Schine: You're not getting anyone back. You have a family.
- Philippe LaRoche: [perfectly well-mannered] You're so right, Deanna. So right. You want to protect your family, 'cause at the end of the day, this is the most important thing in the whole world.