24 reviews
Now this one was pretty insulting, though, honestly, going into a movie called Ninja Cheerleaders you know what you're getting into. Still, the description on the On Demand channel was hard to resist: three college girls are cheerleaders and students by day, but by night they are either ninjas or strippers. Depends on the night. Both of those professions, however, have the same employer, the girls' karate instructor Hiroshi, played by none other than George Takei. Kind of creepy, as the implication is that Sulu has been training these girls in the martial arts since they were children, and then later employed them at his strip club (so they can raise the money to go from their community college to Brown). The action is laughably awful. Most of the acting is actually better than one would expect. The three leads, Trishelle Cannatella, Ginny Weirick and Maitland McConnell are never going to win an Oscar, but they're acting is far above porn star acting. And at least they're attractive. The biggest bummer here is that the three cuties never show their breasts. They get down to lingerie. So as not to tease the audience too much, director Presley throws in some fancy wipes to real strippers for no particular reason as the scenes transition. This is most definitely schlock, but it kind of reminded me of the good old days of late night HBO or USA Up-All-Nite.
Cute. The girls are cute. The fight scenes are cute. The red VW Beetle is cute. Etc.
These girls fight for justice, righting wrongs, selling Girl Scout cookies - that is, when they aren't stealing swords in the middle of the night, cheering at their junior college, and dancing at a strip club, where they never actually strip.
It's funny how a B-movie like this contains less action than it would if it were an A-movie. There is actually more acting in this movie than I expected, given all the background elements thrown in at random.
I think this movie was more fun to make than it is to watch, but it was fun for at least one viewing.
These girls fight for justice, righting wrongs, selling Girl Scout cookies - that is, when they aren't stealing swords in the middle of the night, cheering at their junior college, and dancing at a strip club, where they never actually strip.
It's funny how a B-movie like this contains less action than it would if it were an A-movie. There is actually more acting in this movie than I expected, given all the background elements thrown in at random.
I think this movie was more fun to make than it is to watch, but it was fun for at least one viewing.
OK i don't know exactly what i was expecting going into this......wait no thats a lie i knew exactly what i was expecting when going into this i was expecting to see hot chicks kick butt and i probably had hope for some nudity and i also thought that with the title being "Ninja cheerleaders" i thought that there would at least be some cheesy laughs provided none of which was delivered the lead characters they casted never got past their skivvy's they completely sucked at any type of imitation martial arts and the writing in this film annoyed me i wont even go into detail but its bad and for the cheese factor although it was cheesy it never achieved one laugh i was too busy being mad that the chicks weren't gonna get nakie and im sorry Mr director man the random nude scenes between scenes will just not cut it my rating is 3stars only cause although they chicks weren't great in this film they were very sexy and charming so i gave them each a star and really it doesn't deserve that. some people might get a laugh at it watch and judge yourself
After somehow managing to sit through "Zombie Strippers" (thanks in no small part to the abundance of untethered breasts and jiggly backsides), I attempted to sit through "Ninja Cheerleaders" today, but just couldn't make it. Yes, I was surprised too. I mean, it had all the basic ingredients of a great film - the three lead girls were even community college cheerleaders by day and strippers and ninjas by night, but alas it was still totally unwatchable. Hmmm, perhaps if they had also been lesbian I might have at least made it to the middle of the movie, but I guess that sort of post-production armchair directing is like wishing more things had blown up in "Lost in Translation" and that there had been some hardcore sex in "Breakfast at Tiffany's". I suppose no movie is ever perfect (as those last two examples clearly indicate).
Anyway, I hope my inability to sit through "NC" isn't a sign that I'm now exiting my "prepubescent fascination with anything female and jiggly regardless of how badly written, directed or acted" movie stage. It'd really be a shame since that stage has basically been my defining characteristic up till this point and I'm not sure I'd recognize myself without it. Maybe I should watch "Zombie Strippers" again just to check? ;)
Anyway, I hope my inability to sit through "NC" isn't a sign that I'm now exiting my "prepubescent fascination with anything female and jiggly regardless of how badly written, directed or acted" movie stage. It'd really be a shame since that stage has basically been my defining characteristic up till this point and I'm not sure I'd recognize myself without it. Maybe I should watch "Zombie Strippers" again just to check? ;)
- dylan_spears_2000
- Aug 9, 2008
- Permalink
Seriously this is one of the worst movies ever and yet it is entertaining in a way I can hardly describe. First: The Title. A movie titled "Ninja Cheerleaders" is just a "gotto see this movie" to me. Anyway - the story is incredibly stupid (cheerleader strippers fight to get back the strip club of their ninja master against Michael pare - and to top it, they have to win a strip contest to get money for college....ha ha ha ha). This is a great setting for a really funny but stupid film, but the camera work, the directing work, the music, the actors - everything is just so bad. It is so badly made, it is sometimes hard to watch. But the girls are cute, they are brutal, they beat up everything they can - and then their is Captain Sulu as the master and Michael Pare. I want to like this film - if it was better edited and directed, it be a classic trash one - like this, it is just a film for men, who wanna see babes beat up guys.
- ronnymiller-1
- Aug 8, 2008
- Permalink
I thought I should comment on this film, since it's really not as cute as it was probably meant to be. The film revolves around three girls who are determined to get into Brown College. To pay their tuition they strip at a local bar. The owner of the bar is a ninja master who lands into some heavy trouble and of course the ninja cheerleaders get involved.
The first thing that's off is just the title: Ninja Cheerleaders. It kind of sums it up. I got fooled by the ninja part. Almost everything in the film is tacky. Plot, writing, directing, lighting, fighting etc. A few of the older actors do deliver nicely, but they can't salvage this shipwreck of a film. The biggest disappointment is actually the poor quality of the fights, since I'm a huge fan of martial arts.
I'm thinking that the target audience for this film is young girls who need a strong role-model of a determined successful woman who doesn't need a man. Oh my god, did I really just write that? Another target group is probably teenage boys, who would be better off watching American pie, at least it has boobies in it.
P.S. I might ask the film makers what's up with the topless women between scene changes? Of very poor taste and utterly irrelevant...
The first thing that's off is just the title: Ninja Cheerleaders. It kind of sums it up. I got fooled by the ninja part. Almost everything in the film is tacky. Plot, writing, directing, lighting, fighting etc. A few of the older actors do deliver nicely, but they can't salvage this shipwreck of a film. The biggest disappointment is actually the poor quality of the fights, since I'm a huge fan of martial arts.
I'm thinking that the target audience for this film is young girls who need a strong role-model of a determined successful woman who doesn't need a man. Oh my god, did I really just write that? Another target group is probably teenage boys, who would be better off watching American pie, at least it has boobies in it.
P.S. I might ask the film makers what's up with the topless women between scene changes? Of very poor taste and utterly irrelevant...
I was drawn to the unsurpassable promise given by the title. I got what I expected, but also more. Ninja Cheerleaders is the best bad movie I ever saw, very funny if you don't take it serious and with some surprisingly good elements here and there.
You are not likely to mistake it for a Kubrick movie, nor will you ponder whether Jet Li could have done better fights. I have however seen a lot of allegedly A-movies which are much worse than this.
So if you like the title, don't miss the movie!
And no, they are not naked. They are only very pretty, very sparsely dressed and move quite nicely.
You are not likely to mistake it for a Kubrick movie, nor will you ponder whether Jet Li could have done better fights. I have however seen a lot of allegedly A-movies which are much worse than this.
So if you like the title, don't miss the movie!
And no, they are not naked. They are only very pretty, very sparsely dressed and move quite nicely.
- Scarecrow-88
- Jul 2, 2009
- Permalink
my friend bought over this DVD after picking up on the cheap, I was like OMG Ninja cheerleaders how awesome I was so wrong :(.
it sucked the actors where shocking iv seen better acting on budget porno's.
the only cool thing about the film was George Takia what a legend but his career must be going down hill to even be in this film.
overall when we finished watching I am not joking my friend took the DVD out the DVD player, opened the window and throw followed by me putting the case in the bin.
DO NOT BUY THIS FILM YOU WILL BE VERY LET DOWN BY THIS JUST AWFUL FILM.
it sucked the actors where shocking iv seen better acting on budget porno's.
the only cool thing about the film was George Takia what a legend but his career must be going down hill to even be in this film.
overall when we finished watching I am not joking my friend took the DVD out the DVD player, opened the window and throw followed by me putting the case in the bin.
DO NOT BUY THIS FILM YOU WILL BE VERY LET DOWN BY THIS JUST AWFUL FILM.
- stevendrew18
- Jan 26, 2012
- Permalink
You should be honest here. If you come in to check out a flick with the title of "Ninja Cheerleaders", you're most likely expecting hot cheerleaders and sexy ninjas. Not much more. Certainly neither Grammy-worthy acting nor a real plot is required here. You do actually WANT bad jokes, bad acting, ridiculous action, tons of TnA and heavy cheesiness! :-) You've come to the wrong place my friend, Ninja Cheerleaders does not deliver on almost any of these points! In fact, it might surprise you with bad taste.
Cheese factor is overwhelmingly great, so no complaints in that department. You will indeed get 3 hot all-in-one chicks karate-chopping the living hell out of some villain nuts. I kid you not when I say all-in-one! They're all super smart as well as the most beautiful women on earth who are made of steel, and on top of that they're also strippers, cheerleaders and A-grade college students. They are the essence of feminist perfection (I guess except for the stripper part, but it links in). Not only one of them is that awesome, but all three of them are MORE awesome than the other. I doubt they can even die! Every single dude in the whole school wants to get in their pants, whether jock or professor! In fact, it seems all the men on earth cannot resist them (except for their sage, wise, calm Japanese mentor and sensei... who also employs them as strippers in his club).
Yet, while they're indeed pretty, I didn't seem to be struck by them in the same way the male characters in the movie were. I've seen hotter babes even in real life. Perhaps this whole crazy chemical reaction only happens to the brains of unfortunate males that ran out of luck when they inadvertently happened to be right in front of the killer girls? Poor guys, it must be the spirit of the ninja. So far, so good? Well keep reading.
What baffles me is that with such a title and cover, you are targeting an audience of males looking for some goodhearted enjoyment through cheesy action and plenty of TnA. Yet, you never get any nudity from our katana-loving heroines: BOOOO!!! It gets even worse.
Did I say "karate-chopping the living hell out of some villain *nuts*"? I meant that literally! There's WAY TOO MUCH testicle-crushing here for any normal dude's enjoyment or (even) comfort! At one point, the girls even threaten to shove a hose up a bad guy's anus to his intestines, while taunting him as to whether the water overflowing his intestines would hurt more or would it be the metal tip of the hose entering him! All this, of course, only happens after one of our protagonists crushes his testicles in her bare hands (even commenting on how cool the crushing of testicles sounds). Nothing gory or really vicious-minded, but definitely a most disheartening picture for a normal man (and foolishly, with such a title, normal men are the targeted audience!).
The overly feminist overtones throughout the movie really ridicules the director David Presley. Our heroines explicitly utter things along the lines of "Men think they're superior so I *crush* their reasons to believe so" (with a big smile). Maybe at the time of the making of "Ninja Cheerleaders", Presley had recently undergone surgery below the belt that went really bad, and sought catharsis by making a ball-crushing movie.
On a side note, the acting sometimes is surprisingly good! But then again, the audience for such a movie doesn't care about acting! In fact, within a certain style and range, the worse the acting the more we love it.
I think this flick will greatly appeal to masochist men as well as feminist lesbians. Good, hot-blooded dudes, you should look elsewhere. The verdict: Good crazy action, heavy cheese factor, super-I-AM-YOUR-GOD-women, HEAPS of blatant feminist overtones, a serious lack of taste for a man simply looking for a fun B-Flick, and perhaps worst of all no real nudity. 2 stars for the cheese factor alone. Voilà!
Cheese factor is overwhelmingly great, so no complaints in that department. You will indeed get 3 hot all-in-one chicks karate-chopping the living hell out of some villain nuts. I kid you not when I say all-in-one! They're all super smart as well as the most beautiful women on earth who are made of steel, and on top of that they're also strippers, cheerleaders and A-grade college students. They are the essence of feminist perfection (I guess except for the stripper part, but it links in). Not only one of them is that awesome, but all three of them are MORE awesome than the other. I doubt they can even die! Every single dude in the whole school wants to get in their pants, whether jock or professor! In fact, it seems all the men on earth cannot resist them (except for their sage, wise, calm Japanese mentor and sensei... who also employs them as strippers in his club).
Yet, while they're indeed pretty, I didn't seem to be struck by them in the same way the male characters in the movie were. I've seen hotter babes even in real life. Perhaps this whole crazy chemical reaction only happens to the brains of unfortunate males that ran out of luck when they inadvertently happened to be right in front of the killer girls? Poor guys, it must be the spirit of the ninja. So far, so good? Well keep reading.
What baffles me is that with such a title and cover, you are targeting an audience of males looking for some goodhearted enjoyment through cheesy action and plenty of TnA. Yet, you never get any nudity from our katana-loving heroines: BOOOO!!! It gets even worse.
Did I say "karate-chopping the living hell out of some villain *nuts*"? I meant that literally! There's WAY TOO MUCH testicle-crushing here for any normal dude's enjoyment or (even) comfort! At one point, the girls even threaten to shove a hose up a bad guy's anus to his intestines, while taunting him as to whether the water overflowing his intestines would hurt more or would it be the metal tip of the hose entering him! All this, of course, only happens after one of our protagonists crushes his testicles in her bare hands (even commenting on how cool the crushing of testicles sounds). Nothing gory or really vicious-minded, but definitely a most disheartening picture for a normal man (and foolishly, with such a title, normal men are the targeted audience!).
The overly feminist overtones throughout the movie really ridicules the director David Presley. Our heroines explicitly utter things along the lines of "Men think they're superior so I *crush* their reasons to believe so" (with a big smile). Maybe at the time of the making of "Ninja Cheerleaders", Presley had recently undergone surgery below the belt that went really bad, and sought catharsis by making a ball-crushing movie.
On a side note, the acting sometimes is surprisingly good! But then again, the audience for such a movie doesn't care about acting! In fact, within a certain style and range, the worse the acting the more we love it.
I think this flick will greatly appeal to masochist men as well as feminist lesbians. Good, hot-blooded dudes, you should look elsewhere. The verdict: Good crazy action, heavy cheese factor, super-I-AM-YOUR-GOD-women, HEAPS of blatant feminist overtones, a serious lack of taste for a man simply looking for a fun B-Flick, and perhaps worst of all no real nudity. 2 stars for the cheese factor alone. Voilà!
- the_dead_guy6
- Oct 8, 2010
- Permalink
- carlinturian
- Feb 13, 2014
- Permalink
Are there better B-movies on the market? Yeah, I think so.
The title did NOT lead me to expect a Showgirls movie budget. Should George Takei, Larry Poindexter, and Michael Pare have held out for better roles? Maybe, maybe not. I didn't buy this movie based on their names, or the names of the girls ( frankly, I'd never heard the girls names ), but they ARE pretty.
This is a B-movie, with B-movie values, and pretty girls with topless scenes ( not enough, but then there rarely are ). It kinda sorta had a plot, with few twists you really couldn't see coming.
It is a fun movie. It's not Showgirls; it wasn't meant to be.
The title did NOT lead me to expect a Showgirls movie budget. Should George Takei, Larry Poindexter, and Michael Pare have held out for better roles? Maybe, maybe not. I didn't buy this movie based on their names, or the names of the girls ( frankly, I'd never heard the girls names ), but they ARE pretty.
This is a B-movie, with B-movie values, and pretty girls with topless scenes ( not enough, but then there rarely are ). It kinda sorta had a plot, with few twists you really couldn't see coming.
It is a fun movie. It's not Showgirls; it wasn't meant to be.
This movie is low budget and KNOWS its low budget. We have teenagers obviously being played by adults, that sort of thing. The opening credits started with a great deal of promise for me. In fact, if not for the opening credits, I would be telling you all that this was in fact a zero star movie for me.
The problem lies in the movie knowing its low budget and not knowing what to do with itself. Unlike a movie like "Sharknado" which plays well with its "badness", "Ninja Cheerleaders" fails to use its badness and lack of budget to its benefit. Frequently jokes run on for far too long.
The problem lies in the movie knowing its low budget and not knowing what to do with itself. Unlike a movie like "Sharknado" which plays well with its "badness", "Ninja Cheerleaders" fails to use its badness and lack of budget to its benefit. Frequently jokes run on for far too long.
- squirrelmistress
- Sep 9, 2016
- Permalink
This is the mother of all scams. The only intention for such title is to entice hot-bloodied males (or lesbians), bored to death citizens of the world, or free downloads in the Internet, where people couldn't care less about what download, so long as there are still enough space in the hard disk drive. But I digress.
Throw in 3 stunning females, teach them some nitty karate moves, give them sword. Put in a couple of dumb (and dumber) antagonist, and the Director has made himself a cocktail of disaster.
The acting was so unreal, it made kindergarten kids playing Shakespeare look like Oscar nominees.
The only consolation was that it enables to attract viewers without the need to fork out huge amount of money to advertise.
Verditct : Avoid if you value your brain cells .. and time .
Throw in 3 stunning females, teach them some nitty karate moves, give them sword. Put in a couple of dumb (and dumber) antagonist, and the Director has made himself a cocktail of disaster.
The acting was so unreal, it made kindergarten kids playing Shakespeare look like Oscar nominees.
The only consolation was that it enables to attract viewers without the need to fork out huge amount of money to advertise.
Verditct : Avoid if you value your brain cells .. and time .
Don't see this if you want nudity. Just pointing that out, in case people confuse this for a typical T&A film.
Here's what's good about this film - * George Takei is in it; he does nothing special in it, but his presence alone is amusing * The scenes where they talk to the detective are pretty funny * There's a Bladrunner reference near as I can tell; who would have guessed? * They are pretty cute * There's some badly done fight scenes, but acceptable
Here's what was not so good - * Some pointless dialog scenes - dialog is not what a movie like this is good at, except in a few places where it is funny; but there's some pretty pointless scenes that aren't funny
It was mindless entertainment for 90 minutes or so. It wasn't so bad I turned it off. There's worse films :)
Here's what's good about this film - * George Takei is in it; he does nothing special in it, but his presence alone is amusing * The scenes where they talk to the detective are pretty funny * There's a Bladrunner reference near as I can tell; who would have guessed? * They are pretty cute * There's some badly done fight scenes, but acceptable
Here's what was not so good - * Some pointless dialog scenes - dialog is not what a movie like this is good at, except in a few places where it is funny; but there's some pretty pointless scenes that aren't funny
It was mindless entertainment for 90 minutes or so. It wasn't so bad I turned it off. There's worse films :)
- michaeljhuman
- Dec 9, 2012
- Permalink
- killer_instin29
- Aug 8, 2008
- Permalink
When I purchased this movie it was because it was listed as a comedy movie. And hey, a comedy movie with ninjas can't be half bad. But wow, are you kidding me, this movie was just beyond awful.
I managed to get 23 minutes into the movie before I gave up out of sheer, pure and unadulterated boredom. Nothing, absolutely nothing, in this movie worked for me on any levels. The acting was poor and wooden. The storyline was ridiculous and just never took hold. And finally, the movie seemed to go nowhere.
There was only one thing that surprised me, and that was the fact that George Takei was in this movie. Yet he could not manage to lift up this movie in one bit.
From what I managed to see in the 23 minutes, then I have seen enough to know that I will not make a second attempt to finish this movie. It is rare that a movie is so boring that I get up and eject the disc way before the movie has ended - but it happens every now and then.
I think this movie might appeal to a young teenage audience, because of the women, the senseless nudity and the less than mediocre fight scenes. But for an adult audience, then "Ninja Cheerleaders" was offering nothing of any noteworthy interest.
I am rating "Ninja Cheerleaders" a mere one out of ten stars. And I can honestly say stay well clear of this movie.
I managed to get 23 minutes into the movie before I gave up out of sheer, pure and unadulterated boredom. Nothing, absolutely nothing, in this movie worked for me on any levels. The acting was poor and wooden. The storyline was ridiculous and just never took hold. And finally, the movie seemed to go nowhere.
There was only one thing that surprised me, and that was the fact that George Takei was in this movie. Yet he could not manage to lift up this movie in one bit.
From what I managed to see in the 23 minutes, then I have seen enough to know that I will not make a second attempt to finish this movie. It is rare that a movie is so boring that I get up and eject the disc way before the movie has ended - but it happens every now and then.
I think this movie might appeal to a young teenage audience, because of the women, the senseless nudity and the less than mediocre fight scenes. But for an adult audience, then "Ninja Cheerleaders" was offering nothing of any noteworthy interest.
I am rating "Ninja Cheerleaders" a mere one out of ten stars. And I can honestly say stay well clear of this movie.
- paul_haakonsen
- Feb 11, 2016
- Permalink
- sauravjoshi85
- Sep 4, 2020
- Permalink
You know when something is so bad that it is good? Well, this one just stopped at bad. Some films are campy on purpose others are campy by accident or circumstance; this film is neither, it needs tossing on the campy fire. No structure, no story, and no social redeeming themes or scenes.
Filmed in, you guessed it Los Angeles, California, USA
The basic story: oh, there is none. The dialog is, well, deplorable. Now there is a scene of a deacetylated cheerleader that looks slightly better than Kathy Bates in "About Schmidt" (2003) but just barely. Looks like the film revolves around this sort of thing.
Filmed in, you guessed it Los Angeles, California, USA
The basic story: oh, there is none. The dialog is, well, deplorable. Now there is a scene of a deacetylated cheerleader that looks slightly better than Kathy Bates in "About Schmidt" (2003) but just barely. Looks like the film revolves around this sort of thing.
- Bernie4444
- Oct 22, 2023
- Permalink
Now now - hold your horses or whatever else you need to hold onto. The added "bonus" does not mean an added bonus. What do I mean? Do not expect this to have any nudity. It may have some during scene changes, when a random stripper is being shown, but I can't say for sure, because I didn't really care enough to watch closely if anything could be seen nor did I pause or rewing - so there's that.
But where the movie really loses out on: the fighting. Now for a low budget movie and for people who I suppose never really had much of a training, you could say the action is somewhat decent. But that's the second strike if you really think about it. Where it does score a little bit and saves itself from an even lower score is the weird comedy it serves ... and the casting choices of George Takei and Michael Pare ... who bring some sort of Gravitas to the whole thing.
The three main women do their best to convince in the cute/funny/strange/strong section ... you be the judge if they succeed ... mixed results is may verdict. But they seem lovely and I am sure they had a lot of fun shooting this (and yes they are beautiful too)
But where the movie really loses out on: the fighting. Now for a low budget movie and for people who I suppose never really had much of a training, you could say the action is somewhat decent. But that's the second strike if you really think about it. Where it does score a little bit and saves itself from an even lower score is the weird comedy it serves ... and the casting choices of George Takei and Michael Pare ... who bring some sort of Gravitas to the whole thing.
The three main women do their best to convince in the cute/funny/strange/strong section ... you be the judge if they succeed ... mixed results is may verdict. But they seem lovely and I am sure they had a lot of fun shooting this (and yes they are beautiful too)
- BandSAboutMovies
- Jun 2, 2023
- Permalink
I could see women hating this movie because it had women that most would consider perfect. Also, many men probably hate it because of the fact that so many were raised to believe that women were the inferior gender and that there weren't sex scenes or nude scenes. The only type of people that would like this movie in fact are people like me. People that look forward to movies where there are tough, smart, and attractive women that don't mind breaking a nail after punching some jackass. If you fit into that category than rent this: If you fit into the fist two than don't. Oh, by the way: for such a low budget movie I was surprised Trishelle Cannatella, Ginny Weirick, and Maitland McConnell did so well in there roles. It was also cool to see George Takei as a martial arts master. Bet he got a kick out of it too.
Is this movie something you'd ever recommend to a friend? Well, maybe if they were a horny twenty something or a huge lover of George Takei. But the plot is about as dumb as you'd expect.
That said, the story actually makes sense, which beats most of the movies of this caliber. Also, the girls are reasonably good actors, which probably explains why they have gotten other acting roles, though not a lot.
None of the main stars get naked. There is some random nudity, but far from a lot.
The fights are pretty mediocre. About the level of something on the CW only with fewer explosions.
The characters actually had motivations and backstories which, again, is pretty nice for a movie like this.
That said, the story actually makes sense, which beats most of the movies of this caliber. Also, the girls are reasonably good actors, which probably explains why they have gotten other acting roles, though not a lot.
None of the main stars get naked. There is some random nudity, but far from a lot.
The fights are pretty mediocre. About the level of something on the CW only with fewer explosions.
The characters actually had motivations and backstories which, again, is pretty nice for a movie like this.
- davidolsonn
- Nov 15, 2023
- Permalink