Blood Bound

A dirt cheap horror boom is ongoing, fueled by an apparently insatiable appetite for crap by a younger demographic. BLOOD BOUND suffers from the leading symptom of these video shoots -dimly lit, murky visuals which might as well be shown on the radio.

Milwaukee-lensed junker credited to one Mason Booker gets off to a wobbly start: the screen card reads "Abanoned Warehouse", lacking even proofreading. A pair of cops Coleridge and Murnau (sounds sort of erudite) have a teaser scene with a sexy gypsy-type lady, cueing the "10 Years Later" card.

Premise is that Coleridge has become a super duper vampire, with acolyte villainess Xan helping him, while Murnau has lost his cop job, wife and most everything, now obsessed with destroying his old partner. If this is too corny, we get an idiotic teammate for Murnau in the form of a priest who's been pursuing vampires with wooden stakes "since Vietnam".

The mumbo-jumbo vampire lore and subplot involving a Russian bloodsucker who's conspiring to animate a demon dating back to Ishtar and Gilgamesh is boring and stupid, especially when you can't see what's going on most of the time. There's a modicum of bare breasts to keep the die hards awake, plus the usual unimaginative gore. Since fans of this garbage hail Herschell Gordon Lewis as their fearless leader, they will be mighty disappointed with this meager effort.

Trick ending is confusing and unsatisfying, merely giving the film an unfinished feel. I can't stand the idiotic humor of most of these latter-day amateur night videos, but this one is so humorless and ultimately pretentious in its attempt to inject "significance" that maybe the tongue-in-cheek approach has its pluses. Acting is terrible.