- Neil Anderson: What the hell do know about woman anyway?
- Pavel Karnov: Woman are just like confidence. Watch this. Hello, lady. I know someone who wants to beat your ass.
- Girl at Bar: Oh, yeah? Who?
- Pavel Karnov: My balls.
- Girl at Bar: You're cute.
- Pavel Karnov: See?
- Neil Anderson: You gotta be shitting me, man. That's the worst line I've ever heard.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: [watching on TV as the Ghostbusters defeat a massive serpent monster] You came, you saw, you kicked its ass!
- Levar Gordon: Hey, why don't you use your "talents" to benefit mankind instead of enslaving its afterlife.
- Ed Spengler: Maybe I'll save a soul for you. Seems like you can use one.
- Homeless Joe: I have seen one of those. Is there money in there?
- Klaus Konstantin: You shall be the first to find out.
- [opens up the ghost trap sucking in the homeless man's soul]
- Klaus Konstantin: Disgusting man, I have your pathetic soul. My first one.
- Theater Manager: Thank God you guys are here.
- Ed Spengler: How many are there?
- Theater Manager: Uh, more than one for sure. This isn't too much trouble, is it?
- Neil Anderson: Only for your bank account, pal.