there were few reasons for why I decided to watch the movie (Despite warnings from my clever friends, who I should listen in the first place).
Reason #1: I like 2 actors who took part in this movie, they are Danny Glover and Vinnie Jones. They're not biggest actors in the world but they are likable fellows who certainly know how to entertain audience.
Reason #2: I like steam-punk and fantasy genres and the movie was promising to mix those two.
Reason #3: I think that Moby-Dick is one of those literature classics that is hard to dislike or hard to be unknown for almost anyone, even the most uneducated people, so it is always interesting when another version of the story occurs on the screens.
So I had 3 great reasons to watch the movie. Favorite actors, favorite genre and the masterpiece, on which the story is based.
I don't know how they managed to screw this, but EVERYTHING in this movie went wrong right from the start.
Actors who knew how to act had nothing to work with. Main character was screaming and begging for overacting and Danny didn't deny him the pleasure. Jones tried to act (his biggest mistake) but that's not what we love him for, so he failed. Other actors weren't actors at all. Maybe they have diplomas, but they didn't act. Oh... and the chick... well, the chick was hot.
The movie is steam-punk without steam, and it's fantasy, only because there are dragons. I can understand how the vagon/ship thing moved though. It was this vitriom (or something) that made it move but they never say a thing about it. The screen was absolutely stripped off by fantasy elements as well. The action was almost non-existent, landscape and surroundings were cheap and the world didn't have anything that makes you dig deeper into the particular universe's lore. Well... at least the chick was hot.
While the plot was based on Moby-Dick, it was stripped away from most interesting points, lowered down to some stupid cheap revenge-story and all the weight of explaining the meaning of the book was thrown at Glover's back. The old man just can't carry that much. Well, the bright side of this was the fact that the chick was hot.
What else can we tell about hour and half of my lost life? That this movie will hardly please anyone, except guys who were paid for making it.
I was going to give this movie 2 stars, instead of one, for only reason: The chick was hot... BUT... God damn it... We didn't even see her naked...
