Will Ferrell credited as playing...
Armando
- Miguel Ernesto: I still say you care more for the baby cow than for a woman.
- Armando: Yes, it's true, Manuel, but only because I have not found the right woman.
- Miguel Ernesto: You are so much like your mother. She had such a good heart, and I know your heart is in the right place, but like your mother, you are not smart. You have never been smart.
- Armando: But I am smart father.
- Miguel Ernesto: Yes, of course, Armando. But for my trouble, I need someone who is very smart. If you were truly smart, you would know that you are dumb. Look at your fat head.
- Armando: [singing] # Why does the turtle move so slow? #
- Backing singers: [singing] # I don't know! #
- [last lines]
- DEA Agent #2: Not all Americans are bad, Armando.
- Armando: Not all Mexicans are drug dealers. Are you ready, Sonia?
- Sonia: Yes. Let's go home.
- DEA Agent #2: Bye.
- DEA Agent #2: Bye.
- DEA Agent #2: [as they ride off] Bye, bye. Take it easy...
- White Tiger: [sitting on rock chuckling]