Seriously, it was too childish for adults, yet too adult for children. It can't even decide what kind of film it even wants to be. One moment it's taking the story seriously enough to be a charming cohesive film and the next it's complete bereft of any smarts and is cringe to the max. It was baaaad. If it wasn't for those charming moments, there would have been nothing to save this film from being one of the worst ever made.
Next, lets talk about the Goosebumps vibes this film liberally uses to mask it's awfulness. I get that R L Stine created this story, but you either go full on Goosebumps and make it completely kid friendly without the swearing and blood, or ditch that all together. Felt like a cheap knock off in the end, and further confused me as to why this film exists.
I'm not even going to waste my time complaining about the fact that everybody who's supposed to be a teenager looks like they're in their 40s, including the actual teenagers. Embarrassing.
My last comments on this film will be that it is far too long. This honestly would've worked better as a special Goosebumps tv movie on Hulu or something like that. Not that it would make it anything above average, but easier to swallow than what we got. Literally, when I heard the main character say "Let's go back to the bike shop!" I almost shouted "WHAT FOR, TO WASTE MORE OF OUR TIME?!?!" at the screen.
Overall, I couldn't recommend this one. Even for those looking for a nostalgic trip into the Goosebumps days, it's still terrible. This film makes even the worst episodes look like Oscars material.
½ a simple zombie out of 5.
