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Reviews
The Thin Pink Line (1998)
I Can't Believe It Got Big Name Actors.
This was a last resort for me. I had seen everything else at the video store so I got this, and that was my first mistake. Instead of seeing something I had seen 100 times before that was actually enjoyable like "Fight Club" or even "Muppets from Space", I decided to hire something I hadn't seen before. Surveying the cover seeing the names such as Mike Myers, Janeane Garofalo, Jennifer Aniston, David Schwimmer, Illeana Douglas and Jason Priestly, I was expecting a half way decent movie, that was my second mistake. This movie tries so hard to be subtly funny that it forces its "comedy" in front of the viewer and poses the question "Aren't we funny for being so subtle with our comedy" In a word: No. This movie has a very strong parallel to "Waiting for Guffman": A closeted gay creative type, a motley crew of entertainers and quirky characters, however that is where the parallels finish, for you see "Waiting For Guffman" is a witty non hollywood movie that has some familiar faces and subtle comedy, "The Thin Pink Line" is full of hollywood celebs which the makers seem to load in to try and make up for a very tedious unfunny 101 minutes.Sure there are some lines which envoke a chuckle or a brief belly laugh, but unfortunately, a weak script with a predictable ending as well as an overly eager cast it just doesnt quite gel. The highest score I could give this movie is 2 out of 10, I feel like sending a condolence wreath to the director with a note attached reading "Saw the latest movie, my deepest sympathies"
Sample People (2000)
Haven't you got something better to do?
This movie is such a waste of time. The characters are cliched and the acting is pretty much non existant with exception of a few (Simon Lyndon, Kylie Minogue and Nathan Page stand out). It seems like the director has just watched "Go" and "Trainspotting" and tried to create a Frankenstein like movie, with disastrous results. The drug scenes are supposed to be hard hitting but is nothing more than you could see on any other drug related movie. So far you're probably thinking this movie is still watchable, which it is-just. But before you rush out and see it I'll warn you of Ben Mendelson's attrocious performance. He is by far the most annoying character ever to be seen in an Australian movie. Ever.It's moments like this that make you think how and why a movie like this gets financed and also made it to the cinemas. In conclusion I thought this movie was trying too hard to be cool and edgy that it forgot to add plot and character depth. It would seem that the sudden surge of Australian actors setting off for Hollywood(Toni Collette in "The 6th Sense", Russell Crowe in "Gladiator" and "The Insider" as well as Heath Ledger in "The Patriot")seems to be because of the crud that is being made in Australia. Australia needs to create some great roles for up and coming actors before we lose our young stars to Hollywood forever. I give Sample people 5/10 and thats being VERY kind.
Cut (2000)
Not Since the 1980s has a horror movie sucked so much(minor spoilers)
Originally attracted by the fact that Kylie Minogue was in this movie, I went to see this film and what I saw was the most embarrassing movie in the history of Australia (and yes I am including Welcome to Woop Woop...Thats how bad this movie is!) which Im sure made the entire audience embarrassed that they were Australian. The movie is so unstructured and unresearched (note to writers: a spear through the neck cannot be cured by wrapping a bandage around it) and at several times in the movie the viewer is left screwing their face up saying "What The Hell?!" .The Lines are tripe to say the least, and the end I seriously felt like slitting my wrists so I wouldnt have to accept what they delivered as the ending.Speaking of self mutilation try to avoid taking into the cinema anything sharp, the temptation to kill yourself could prove too tempting. Summing up I give this advice, Go into the movie expecting something decent and you will be disappointed. Go in hoping for something that resembles Showgirls, and you just might like this movie.Its jokes dont work but this movie IS hilarious in the same way Showgirls is.