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October Faction (2020)

So terribly slow

One would hope that after so many vampire, demon slayer, dull parents turning out killer agents movies, filmmakers only start a new one if they have some utterly new approach. This one is not the case. I am at episode 4 and even with many fast forwards, it is terribly slow and unoriginal. The parent couple look bored as hell, the kids (hahaha) playing 17-or something teenagers are waaay older. The girl is painful to watch, struggling to look and act half her age. Their grandmother should be a mean old bag, but other than speaking some words, nothing happens, zero acting. The superbad woman should be terrifying, but instead she relies on her eyes turning red to make us shiver. Not working, sorry. For that matter, the whole series is not working. Will something finally happen in episode 5 or 6? I don't even care, honestly.

Trigger Warning (2024)

An insult to movie viewers

This movie has been intensely promoted on Netflix for two weeks, so I was looking forward to it, foolishly forgetting that about 1 in 50 newly released Netflix movies are decent (not good though). So I stopped watching my series and pressed play on Trigger Warning.

So, of this was the first ever action movie, it could be probably regarded as a good one. It is obviously low budget, which would not be a problem, but it is low from every aspect possible: story, acting, credibility. No, no, no. Badass woman beating all males around, her superpowers residing in fighting with blades. That s it. Just go with any other Hollywood movie.

Hidden Strike (2023)

Don't expect too much and you'll be fine

So this is a Netflix movie with Jackie Chan. Enough not to expect too much, right? If you didn't, you already made yourself a favor and you'll have pretty decent fun. The budget was consumed for paying Chan and Pilou Asbaek (yes, as a villain, again) so the CGI is lousy. But dialogues are entertaining, there's the amount of kung fu (or whatever's Jackie's thing) you'd expect. Yes, Jackie is a bit old for this part, and Cena getting up barely scratched after being propelled out of a car is a bit too much. But ignore these (a Netflix movie, remember?) and you won't feel disappointed when the credits start rolling.

Spy/Master (2023)

Almost good

Making a cold war series about a specific country is a terribly difficult task. Yes, people may remember Nicolae Ceausescu, but anything else about pre-1989 Romania is probably hardly attractive. The Spy/Master team attempted the impossible and unfortunately failed in many ways. For those familiar with Budapest many sets will look awkwardly recognizable to be taken for Bonn or any German city. But you just have to deal with it. But the story and characters... First, Godeanu. We are expected to see him rather a victim of the regime and a loving father and not the ruthless Communist secret service head who destroyed many lives getting to the top. Second, the American embassy and its security. It was just painful to see the Romanian agents roaming freely on the hallways, nobody asking them what the hell they were doing there. Yeah, disguised in catering personnel, but still?? And how on Earth can a terrorist enter the embassy with a huge briefcase fully packed with a bomb, nobody asking him to open it? How a CIA operative lets someone toss him away and search a CIA SAFEHOUSE??? Come on!! And at the end we are told that the whole story was about Carter and the Camp David agreement... err, what?? This could have been a so much better series. Ana Ularu was chilling as a Romanian bulldog-style agent, but that's about it.

Glitch (2015)

Why oh why didn't I take the blue pill

I watched the first two seasons day and night. By the end of the second I started noticing bad signs. Like the explanations of how Eilisha brought back the dead. She did this - Heysen explains - by using stem cells and out(re)growing the bodies from these. But people dead 100 yrs ago have no stem cells saved, right? Also, the frequency Heysen (re)discovered should resonate with the brain cells in a way that it brings back memories. But brain decomposes pretty rapidly so... what cells?? Plus other signs indicating that the producers of the show got bored or tired of it, or both. Despite that yes, I started warching S3 thinking that out of respect for viewers and for their previous work, they will make the effort to keep a decent quality to Glitch. Hell, no. They chose the simplest solution, bringing in new characters and new stories. Random characters, random stories. So guys, don't. Season 3 is bad, superficial and uninteresting. I gave it 4 stars as respect for S1 and 2, otherwise shame, shame, shame.

Gil Bok-soon (2023)

Oh man

I' ve seen several movies lately written and directed by the same person. My message to them: don't. The outcome is inevitably a salad with everything in it, desperately trying to be original but falling apart in this gigantic effort to mix everything in. Unfortunately, Kill Bok-soon is no exception. First, the director has no idea what this movie wants to be: a dark movie? A comedy? A jaw-dropping action movie? A psychological drama? Second: if you want yo make a local John Wick movie, just do it. Don't pretend to be something else, patching it with endless, boring and nonsense mother-daughter dialogues. Third: choose your villain and stick to it. Who is it here? Chairman Cha? Director Cha? And finally, and probably because of all those mentioned before: it is soooo loooongggg. Man I had to switch it off and some point, it was so unbearably boring. Less is more people. It's such an old rule, just go with it, please.

House of Gucci (2021)

What was the point??

For a long time, I avoided this movie. I don't care about family scandals, I don't care about the machinations between members of rich families. But somehow I had faith that Ridley Scott is different, that he is above all those cliches we have seen so many times before. And when the movie ended, I was like, what the mother of God was that?? Why this? Why them? Is the Gucci brand so outstanding that it was worth showing what was behind? No. Was the figure of Patrizia so unusual, so unheard of? No, and actually Shakespeare depicted it better 400 years ago. Was this a story about how a wife ends up killing her husband? Wow, again, we have seen this so many times. So, why Scott made this movie? Yeah, he casted superstars, but... that's it?? I am not saying it's a bad movie, it's just... void of any message or substance. One could live without it.

Mine (2016)

I don't get this

So, I am not a military expert but I was confused by:

• marines have absolutely no training on how to handle mines?

• even if not, the guy had absolutely none urge to dig around the mine, at least to see its condition?

• if the sandstorm was so strong, wouldn't it be an option to just jump and let the storm blow away the explosion? Yes there would be some damage but at least the shrapnel would be blown off
• couldn't he drag Tom's body onto the mine while dragging his foot off? Yeah, risky, but rotting under the sun for 57 hrs?

Manifest (2018)

What the hell people?

I am now watching S1/E10. I gave it tons of chances. But no. Slow, slow, terrible dialogues, painful to watch actors, as if there was no director behind. None. So much eye rolling, sighing... was there really noone to see and to scream that this is just plain bad?? 7/10? Really?

Life (2017)

Apart from the ending...

Yes, I know, it is so lame to compare it to Alien. But when I saw the scientist poking the thing, I couldn't help thinking of Brad Dourif in Alien Resurrection when he imitates kissing the xenomorph. Btw, what scientist, let alone astronaut would touch an alien life form barely wearing some lousy rubber gloves? Especially when you see it growing?? Cmon people. Disappointing. Otherwise, great cast and good ending. But that's about it.

Interceptor (2022)

A movie that doesn't want to be more than it is

All right, it's not Hamlet. But it is entertaining and if you're looking for a movie to clear your brains on a Friday afternoon, it's perfect. Yes, you've seen all the cliches before but it is pretty coherent. Good job, I say, definitely better than 4.8 where it stands now.

The Whole Truth (2021)

Horribly long

The concept is good but the whole plot is no more than 30-40 minutes. Instead it is 2 hours, filled with irrelevant sidelines (the Fame guy). Just use fast forward to skip these and it'll be ok.

Point of No Return (1993)

Confused

This is a decent movie. It would've been great, but... and there's a lot of buts. Luc Besson's Nikita was fresh, rough, depressing, left you thinking. It had spirit and originality. Three years later, some people in America thought it needs a remake. The result is a well executed copy, with excellent actors, but why? What was in Nikita that the American viewers could not digest? It's like driving a Cadillac after a Porsche. It's neat and shiny, but no adrenaline.

Jarhead 3: The Siege (2016)

so, so bad.

Imagine a war movie without one single hand grenade. Unreal? Yep, Jarhead 3 is this movie. Boring characters, cliché story, zero creativity. I would have never imagined that I would say 'I prefer any Michael Bay movie instead of this' but here it is, I am saying it.

Midnight Mass (2021)

Philosophical theology or theological philosophy, whatever

If you're into listening to tons of Bible quotes and very long conversations on death, sins and faith, then you'll have awesome 7 hours. Otherwise avoid it.

The Rhythm Section (2020)

Worth watching

Compared to the tons of mediocre titles uploaded to/by Netflix, this is a refreshingly decent thriller. Not terribly original (the story and Lively's character show a strong resemblance to Luc Besson's Nikita) and has some logical flaws, but it fairly believable and captivating. Yes, the camera is sometimes annoying, but you can't have it all. I was particularly satisfied with seeing Richard Brake featured (as a vilain, again). Btw, who would keep at home a syringe with a toxine as a self defense weapon and not a knife or gun? Ehh.

Beckett (2021)

Oh boy

For about an hour or so, the movie was just bad. Then in the last 20 minutes it turned into an insult to the viewer. Picture yourself a man stabbed and shot, barely alive. He jumps from 3 stories high on a moving car, and not only he does not die, but he even beats a cop. If it were a Bollywood film, I would say, sure. But this is Netflix! Yeah, sadly, this really is Netflix.

Bronx (2020)

Who's who

Not bad but too many characters, I lost track of who's who and who's chasing who and why. But hey, you can hear Jean Reno speak French. And can anyone decode the ending for me?