meow_mix
Joined Apr 2003
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Reviews10
meow_mix's rating
This one is just downright glorious. If you love absolutely terrible movies, you'll dig the ever-loving heck out of this one! The maverick male lead is named Dirk Laramie (played to a cheesetacular tee by Gianni Garko, and he rocks a blonde porno 'stache and makes out with all the hot babes. The plot is about as meandering and ridiculous as the dialogue (though it has some hilarious lines throughout) and soundtrack (think: improvisational jazz on a moog synth but on acid), so tough to summarize but they're on the hunt for entherium and silly spacecapades ensue along the way. It rips off Star Trek outfits, and Star Wars (light sabers and R2D2), has a literal rock-'em-sock-'em robot (this one is gray though), and characters that are almost an exact version of Bronco from Gentlemen Broncos, an auction scene with Flash Gordon vibes and haunted muppet-looking characters, a pair of suicidal star-crossed robot lovers that look like teletubbies meet Howard the Duck, and sooooo much more.
Whoever said this is why the Italians weren't known for space movies was dead wrong (in my opinion)-this is an absolute treasure!
You'll do well to just get lost in it and don't approach it critically as this fever dream-esque space romp just straight up wilds out hard, and may be the king-nay, emperor-of bad boomer-era space movies. A must-watch that will definitely end up in my regular rotation and at the pinnacle of my altar to campy flicks!
(P. S. I can't believe it hasn't been RiffTrax'd or MST3K'd yet, but since it's in the public domain now I have high hopes!)
Whoever said this is why the Italians weren't known for space movies was dead wrong (in my opinion)-this is an absolute treasure!
You'll do well to just get lost in it and don't approach it critically as this fever dream-esque space romp just straight up wilds out hard, and may be the king-nay, emperor-of bad boomer-era space movies. A must-watch that will definitely end up in my regular rotation and at the pinnacle of my altar to campy flicks!
(P. S. I can't believe it hasn't been RiffTrax'd or MST3K'd yet, but since it's in the public domain now I have high hopes!)
This movie is a fever dream packed with 80s-tastic, dystopian/post-apocalyptic cheesy sleaze. Partial nudity in the first 60 seconds and all-gas-no-brakes from there. If David Lynch, Jim Henson, Bob Guccioni, Tommy Wiseau, and Willard Huyck had a baby, that baby might have written and directed this movie...after smoking, snorting, and injecting every drug on the planet, that is. Actually, it was directed by Donald G. Jackson, who schlock fans may know as the director of "Roller Gator," which has a personal distinction for me as being the lowest-rated movie (on IMDb) that I have ever watched (as of this writing: 1.2/10!!). Fear not, though, friends-this movie beats the ever-loving *skates* off of Roller Gator in all of the best-worst ways possible.
Let's get the obvious out of the way-there is ***nothing*** "good" about this movie. No shining moment stands out as well done, or even decent. What makes it good is its seemingly headlong, pell-mell, Ratfink-with-his-tongue-out, making Usain Bolt look slow, pedal-to-the-metal race to the bottom. And by "bottom," I mean so far to the bottom it probably goes through the center of the earth and out into deep space.
From the balls to the wall, time capsule-esque 80s-ness, to the horribly cartoonish dubbing, to the ridiculous and also-cartoonish costumes, to the premise, to the "plot" (LOL!!!), to the dialogue, to the "acting," to...well everything about it, it's so campy it's actually painful to watch-in a good way.
If you, like me, truly are a lover of seriously abysmally BAD "films," (not just so bad it's good but just BAD) this one will make your entire day. I hereby pronounce it the greatest worst movie of all time, which is saying something as I've seen a lot of stinkers in my day.
One last thing I'll say is that I'm so glad I didn't eat an edible before watching this. It might have permanently broken my brain 😂 I implore you to urgently give this low-hanging-fruit-salad of-I struggle to say-"cinema" a chance and see if you don't laugh as hard as I did.
Let's get the obvious out of the way-there is ***nothing*** "good" about this movie. No shining moment stands out as well done, or even decent. What makes it good is its seemingly headlong, pell-mell, Ratfink-with-his-tongue-out, making Usain Bolt look slow, pedal-to-the-metal race to the bottom. And by "bottom," I mean so far to the bottom it probably goes through the center of the earth and out into deep space.
From the balls to the wall, time capsule-esque 80s-ness, to the horribly cartoonish dubbing, to the ridiculous and also-cartoonish costumes, to the premise, to the "plot" (LOL!!!), to the dialogue, to the "acting," to...well everything about it, it's so campy it's actually painful to watch-in a good way.
If you, like me, truly are a lover of seriously abysmally BAD "films," (not just so bad it's good but just BAD) this one will make your entire day. I hereby pronounce it the greatest worst movie of all time, which is saying something as I've seen a lot of stinkers in my day.
One last thing I'll say is that I'm so glad I didn't eat an edible before watching this. It might have permanently broken my brain 😂 I implore you to urgently give this low-hanging-fruit-salad of-I struggle to say-"cinema" a chance and see if you don't laugh as hard as I did.
Chuck Norris + lots off dusty places and sweaty people + a bar full of 1. Creepy dolls, 2. A barmaid in a Lola-Paltinger-worthy dirndl with oddly-colored ribbons tied in her hair like a small dog, 3. A Lilliputian chess set, 4. Only a few dusty bottles of off-brand liquor, 5. The decor of a dive from Bar Rescue + a grocery store with a bunch of paper signs outside shilling a bunch of probably-expired food in a tone of sheer desperation + a hilarious love van with an eagle painted on both sides = holy smokes how did this not sweep the Oscars?
And did I mention Chuck Norris in that most classic of formal attire: the Canadian tuxedo? Banjo music x 1,000!!! Car chases with rooster tails of dust!!! And I admit I watched the Rifftrax version which was hilarious but even without that it would be a fun romp with a couple o' Cuhrz Lahts in your system.
Pop the chicharrones, crack a cold one, and enjoy the wonder that is Breaker, Breaker!!
And did I mention Chuck Norris in that most classic of formal attire: the Canadian tuxedo? Banjo music x 1,000!!! Car chases with rooster tails of dust!!! And I admit I watched the Rifftrax version which was hilarious but even without that it would be a fun romp with a couple o' Cuhrz Lahts in your system.
Pop the chicharrones, crack a cold one, and enjoy the wonder that is Breaker, Breaker!!