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Reviews
The Sinner (2017)
Another show gets in its own way...
Season 1 is amazing. Kept me trying to figure out what the heck was going on the whole time.
Season 2? Sucks. The first episode is about the worst example of tokenism in television. When Harry is having dinner with his hometown friend, his friend, out of NOWHERE, announces to the world that his daughter is gay by saying: "Oh! Did I tell you she's gay?? Yeah! She came out to me!" What a load of garbage writing... they then proceed to SHOW her being gay...which would've been much better Storytelling.
Will update as I watch. To be honest, season 3 looked promising (accidentally started on that season since Netflix's idiotic algorithm starts new shows on the newest season now...so stupid).
Manhunt (2017)
Season 1: 10 stars. Season 2: 1 star.
Season 1 was great. Season 2 is garbage. Bad writing, bad acting,...just BAD.
They crammed every little ounce of forced conflict into this thing as they could.
Every semi-tense moment is cranked up to 10...
If you want to see a good representation of this story, watch the film: "Richard Jewell"
The Kid (2019)
The plot was everywhere
For starters, I LOVE westerns. They're my favorite genre, and it's sad how in decline they are at this time in cinematic history. That being said...I just couldn't get into this film.
Let me start with what's good:
-the costuming and weaponry are very well done. It really feels like the early 1880s.
-they stuck to the main historical points of the conflict between Pat Garrett and Billy The Kid. Everything that was supposed to happen, happened.
-the acting was very well done, especially considering the lousy script they were given.
Now, let's look at where this film falls apart:
-the dialogue is just terrible. It feels like Deadwood, but worse. I'm not one to clutch pearls at profanity (Deadpool is one of my favorites, if that's any indication), but this film just had too much for a western. If all I heard was the audio, I'd think the setting was 1980's Texas, not 1880's New Mexico. The use of language is just all wrong.
-the plot is nonsense. Why even bother having Billy The Kid in it? This film could've literally been exactly the same if it was just about the actual kid. It's like they couldn't decide between being a fictional western, and a biography. Pick a lane and stay in it, because trying to do each of them together is doing them both a disservice. The marketing for this film made it seem like it was solely about Billy The Kid, which is a film I would've loved to see...but not this.
-due to the nonsensical plot, more action would've helped this film out. Or, a MUCH bigger build up to the final gunfight (think Open Range...best build up to the most realistic gunfight I've ever seen in a western).
It could've been so much more, but it just falls flat.
How to Pick Your Second Husband First (2018)
An hour of my life I'll never get back...
Full disclosure: I work on films...so my opinion is pretty biased.
For starters, I take no pleasure in trashing a film...this one is just unavoidable.
TL;DR = A marriage counselor tries to come up with an idea for a new book (deadlines!!!), while also trying to fix her own marriage...oh and there's a puppy. Bad cinematography, bad editing, bad acting, bad writing...just bad.
Now, for the main part:...I gave up an hour into this film. This movie makes Hallmark films look like gold. The cinematography was just plain amateur. Deep focus throughout, bad framing, completely blown out highlights...like, for real, there's a thing called "ND filters"...use them. They make them in gels too, toss 'em up on all those dang windows.
Production design was awful. White walls throughout, hardly any glasses in the cupboards, scant decorations...it looked like they rented an apartment for shooting and just used what was there. Very little color, which translates to very little life on screen. The moire was pretty atrocious, (which, if it were relegated to a couple of scenes, I'd look past it as being the screen...but there were a bunch of them...). Oh, and there's a part where a male dog does a very female dog thing...you'll see what I mean if you make it that far. Obviously, they had to fake it, and did a poor job.
The acting was awkward...very awkward. Think college class short film awkward. Which leads me to the writing and directing, which I'm sure was half the problem here: the writing is probably the worst part of this movie. So Much Exposition!!! This isn't theatre...I don't want the character to tell me what they're feeling, I want them to SHOW ME!!! Show Dont Tell!!! Ugh! That's my biggest pet peeve of all time. Adding to the dumpster fire, is the dialogue. Did they not do any table reads? Literally NONE of the dialogue sounded natural. It all sounded rehearsed...and exposition-ridden.
The characters were flat as all get-out. I couldn't care less what happened to them...not that anything ever really did. If it happened after the first hour...too late, you've already lost everyone's attention.
Editing wasn't terrible...but it wasn't great either...just kinda meh. There were a few very awkward cuts that should've had a redo.
There's probably a dozen other things I picked out that bothered me, but you get my point. Avoid, don't waste an evening like I did.
Les frères Sisters (2018)
I loved this film
For starters, I love westerns. They're a dying breed, expensive and difficult to make. But when you nail it...it's so satisfying. The Sisters Brothers nails it, in my opinion. I love the costuming, the direction and action, and the cinematography is very well done. Highly recommend.
Unplanned (2019)
Think for yourselves, ignore the biased critics
Let's be honest, half of them didn't watch it. They just found out the film's premise, and bashed it without a second thought to possibly coming out of their echo chambers and hearing a different opinion for once. But hey, what else is new?
Mile 22 (2018)
Rambling, incoherent dialogue does not a good film make
Usually, I'm a huge Peter Berg fan. Lone Survivor, Patriot Day, Deepwater Horizon...all top notch. This film was a pretty huge letdown. I only enjoyed the action parts tbh...luckily those were plentiful. But the freaking dialogue was just incoherent babble. They tried to do too many things with this film and ended up succeeded at none of them.
Bone Tomahawk (2015)
$1.8 million wasted...
Bad acting...bad effects...bad bad bad!! I am genuinely surprised that this CF has gotten so many good reviews. Within the first 5 minutes, somebody gets shot, and the squib is a full 5 frames after the gunshot...that's some awful directing right there.
Save yourself two hours and avoid this dumpster fire of a film. Just because there's awesome actors in it doesn't mean it's a good movie.
Allied (2016)
A movie you either really like, or really hate
I'm one of those people that love these types of films, where the ending ain't really all that happy. Something about them just rings true to me. In my opinion, a good film is this: Some people should love it, and some people should hate it. That's right where a good film should be.
Moving on, I love the spy thrillers, so that's what roped me in on this one. Marion Cotillard does a fabulous job. I can't find anywhere to knock on her performance. This wasn't Pitt's BEST performance...but it sure as hell wasnt bad either.
The reason I've rated this film as an 8 is mainly due to poor editing. There's numerous times where the continuity of action was very poor, and some very rough cuts when it came to sound.
All in all, I enjoyed this film very much, and recommend it to anyone with an open mind.
Big Mouth (2017)
Nothing more than a vessel for political propaganda
Typically, if a show is really hyped up...assume your friends are idiots, because typically they end up being trash.
For starters, this show is ABSOLUTELY disgusting. And that's coming from someone who LOVES the show 'Brickleberry.' This show is simply an attempt to push a political agenda. Nothing more. They take literally ANY opportunity to inject politics into it...I mean, come on... We get it.
Now, I love crude humor, but there has to be actual HUMOR. On top of all that...it isn't even funny, which is rare for Nick Kroll. At the end of the day, if you love political propaganda (which, isn't entertainment supposed to be an escape from reality?...) then you'll love this show. However, if you're a NORMAL person who hates politics, do yourself a favor and avoid this garbage.
The Shannara Chronicles (2016)
If you're drunk on a Tuesday night with nothing better to do...
Out of all the actors on this series,...only 2 are good. The rest are absolutely ABYSMAL. Honestly, if I hadn't already known better, I would've thought it was a crappy student film. (Not to knock on student Films, since I'm currently a film student as well). The dialogue just isn't believable half the time. They have so much lore that they have to explain, that the concept of "show don't tell" goes completely out the window. You have actors spewing out monologues that are just explaining what a place is, and why it's either good or bad. The effects are sub par as well, but they're definitely leaps and bounds better than the rest of the series.
It's such a shame, because the books were good. They should fire the casting director for sure.
Writing: -10/10
Acting: -5/10
Effects: 6/10
Cinematography: 5/10
Choreography: 4/10
If you're drunk on a Tuesday night with nothin better to do and you don't have to go to work on Wednesday morning,...sure watch it. Otherwise, expect another typical MTV garbage fire.
The Legend of Tarzan (2016)
Don't waste your time
There's so many things wrong with this film...it's hard to know where to begin. For starters, it's not the Disney Tarzan we all know and love. This is something entirely different, and far inferior to the original. It was an absolute waste of my life. I'll start from the least bad thing, and work my way to the worst aspect of this film. Don't worry, there's no spoilers.
First, the acting is terrible. It's like Yates just told them what to do and say right before they rolled the camera. You don't really feel like the characters are real.
Second, the writing is atrocious. They go from language and dialect of the era, to SLJ saying some slang from this day and age. Like, come on, dude. Be better.
Third, they obviously didn't do much research into the accuracy of certain weaponry they used in the film that originated from the time era, you'll see what I mean when you watch the climax of the film.
Fourth, and worst of all,...the animation and special effects are ATROCIOUS. It's cringeworthy to watch the animals in the film, they're so obviously fake. How this film had such a huge budget, I will never understand. It was not money well spent.
In conclusion...don't watch this trash. Watch the original Disney version...so much better.
Life (2017)
If not for the Cinematography and VFX, I'd give it a 0
If you're into science...don't watch this movie. You'll hate it. The lack of scientific knowledge displayed in this film is mind-boggling. The writer was just flat out LAZY! It's not that hard to research what you're writing! With that out of the way, let's dive into this mess:
Pros: 1.) Cinematography. DP Seamus McGarvey did a fantastic job. There are quite a few long takes, which I love, and I believe they were done very well. 2.) the visual effects are incredible. The film is visually stunning. I'll raise my glass to that.
Cons: Virtually everything else. Where do I even begin? 1.) idiotic plot line. The alien needs oxygen? How?...Mars is 98% CO2...oh, but you decided to say he was able to hibernate for millions of years, since a time Mars had much more oxygen...just, lazy. 2.) idiotic plot line, again. Yeah, it's that bad. Calvin (the alien...), escapes the first firewall by cutting through the glove with some electric pen tool he broke when the biologist tried to wake him up with it. You're telling me a few weeks old alien figured out how to do something that took millions of years for humans to figure out? Lol. 3.) you guessed it...plot line. If those issues weren't bad enough...THE ALIEN FIGURES OUT HOW TO RE-ENTER EARTH'S ATMOSPHERE USING A LIFEBOAT THAT JAKE GYLLENHALL IS PILOTING!!! I mean, come ON!!! 4.) the science is horrendous. Don't even get me started. 5.) generic, boring characters. 6.) the dialogue was pretty boring as well. 7.) Plot line!!!!
You know a movie is gonna suck when the third actor on the billing block is only in the film for 20 minutes.
Cloud Atlas (2012)
Very good film, you just have to pay attention
I did not find this film to be a mess at all. In fact, quite the opposite. The way they edit it all together is absolutely seamless as they jump to and fro through the centuries and stories, and tie it all together so that everything is connected.
Visuals are fantastic, I love the futuristic Korea, and the post-apocalypse Hawaii. The acting is amazing, which you can always expect of Tom Hanks and Halle Berry, plus the rest of the cast does an awesome job as well.
I gave this 9 stars instead of 10 because I found it very very very distracting when they tried to use make up to make the Asian actress look like a caucasian ginger. The facial structures between caucasians and asians are different, so it physically did not look right. Plus...her English was not really up to par with that particular character. (You would assume a girl from a slave- owning family would have a firm grasp on the English language,...especially since her characters father speaks perfect English. I don't know, I'm a stickler for details.)
Oblivion (2013)
I thought it was excellent
I thought this movie was definitely Tom Cruise's best performance of his career. He plays the character of Jack perfectly. Casting did a great job on this one.
Visuals are spectacular. They spent a long long time on the effects and landscape for this film, and that work paid off. I was amazed at the scenery. Absolutely amazed.
I loved the story. The way this story plays out will make your jaw drop when the twist comes in. But, you have to pay attention. If you don't, then there's no point in watching it because you're going to be clueless the whole time.
R.I.P.D. (2013)
pretty disappointed by this movie
I was sooooo excited to see it, but it ultimately fell short of my expectations.
The story honestly moves too fast in the beginning, with little to no character development until 3/4 of the way through the movie, and even that small bit of development was mediocre at best.
Acting was just bleh. Jeff Bridges put on a fantastic performance, as always. His character amusingly resembles that of his part as Rooster Cogburn in the True Grit remake, which was also very good. Ryan Reynolds looks like hes just there for the paycheck, and to add another title to his resume.
Visuals were very cartoon-ish honestly. I don't know, I just didn't like it. I laughed a ton, don't get me wrong, but in a film sense, this movie sucked. Comedy sense, hilarious. It got 5 stars out of 10 from me cuz I got to see it free.
Red Dawn (2012)
Okay it was THAT bad guys. Chill out.
While I agree that with better writing and directing, this film could've been absolutely amazing, it's just a good movie, not an amazing one. There are many things I would've done differently, but it still was an enjoyable watch. Great graphics and effects and very good acting. I think the film moved way to fast in the beginning, but it began to slow down after about 15-20 minutes.
Peck and Hemsworth put on an amazing performance, showing a real sense of "sibling rivalry" between them. Peck also does a great job of depicting his character as all this crap happens to him. I really enjoyed the acting without a doubt. Always been a fan of Hemsworth, Peck, and Hutcherson.
The writing was pretty crappy at times, but not so bad that it makes you wanna leave, just kinda cheesy.
All in all, this is a good one time watch, maybe even 2 or 3. It's a 7 star film for me.
Ted (2012)
if you don't like family guy, beware of this movie.
let me start by saying that I hate family guy. its stupid, boring, and just all around not funny.
that being said, lets get to my review: my friends dragged me to see this film, so i thought "eh what the heck might as well".
106 minutes and 19 dollars later, I just felt....lost. the movie is a spitting image of family guy (and why wouldn't it be, the guy who made family guy voices the main character.) but there's the problem....lame jokes, missed jokes, and no jokes. I wanted to like this movie SOOO bad...and I actually got distracted from the film because I was trying to hard to like it. halfway through I gave up. no hope.
It has a good story, so thats why its getting 3 stars. the comedy and all the "family guy" theme is what took 7 stars away.
if you plan on seeing this movie, I hope you like family guy.
5 Days of War (2011)
amazing action and effects,....horribly executed film
the only reason i am giving this film a 5 is mainly due to the action. The action was incredibly choreographed and excellent special effects. Great Cinematography.
Now, the story, plot, acting, writing, historical accuracy,.....all crap. it was horribly inaccurate and biased toward the Georgians, who actually started the war. it was basically a big fat Georgian propaganda film. both sides committed atrocities in this horrible 5 day war. it wasn't good guy vs bad guy, it was bad guy vs bad guy. If the writers and Director had done any research, they'd know all of this.
next, the story, plot, and writing. the story is just badly planned out, and doesn't really show any background,....mainly due to the fact that this is a huge propaganda Georgia film. The plot was plain and predictable. So, that really made me not enjoy this film. The writing was pretty p_i_s_s_ poor. No background story, the lines were stiff and just not emotional at all.
acting was bad, but not horrendous. I have seen much much worse.
all in all, this movie could have been one amazing work of art and story telling, but they got too focused on the money, which they obviously failed miserably at: $12,000,000 budget, only got $60,000 in the box office. So yeah, overall just a good one time watch when you are ridiculously bored out of your mind
The Hunger Games (2012)
awesome awesome awesome
I am making this a 9, and not a 10, simply because they made it PG13 and not R, to make more money. Yeah sure, they skipped out on a lot of the "specifics" of the child brutality, and the paragraphs of brutal murder and killing, but I'm critiquing the FILM....not the book. If you went to this Film, and critiqued it from the book,....you're stupid.
This movie has a ton of emotion and a lot of "edge-of-your-chair" moments. The directing was superb, and the Acting was absolutely top notch. Jennifer Lawrence and Josh Hutcherson really matched up quite well.
The costume and set designers really did a fantastic job as well. The hideous attire, and furnishings, really made me feel like we were in the absolutely messed up world of the future. I think they could have touched up on how the country got to that state a little more in the beginning,....but 2.5hrs is long enough for me.
Anyways, the Cinematography was very good, most of it looked hand-held to me (which I love, but thats just me) So it really added a ton of suspense. Some people don't like it. I do.
Overall, it was a 10 star film, but it could've had a little bit better dialogue at certain parts. I definitely recommend this film to anyone thinking about seeing it.
Act of Valor (2012)
You people are stupid, its actually a great film
OK, I for one am tired of seeing all these pansy actors on screen trying to act tough when we all know that they got assisstants just off screen getting them coffee. now, we get a movie that actually has the REAL DEAL, REAL NAVY SEALs!!....and you people bash their "acting".
okay, for 1.) the acting, i thought, was actually millions times better than i expected since i was paying attention to what you idiots said (which i will never do again). They are Navy SEALs, not actors. we all knew it wasn't gonna be a Oscar nominated film for acting....retards. The acting wasn't even that bad. so shut up.
2.) the action is absolutely amazing. I was transfixed during the action. Like, it has some of the best action scenes I have ever scene due to the SEAL actors. And some of it was very emotional, I had a knot in my throat at the end.
So, next time you see a film with all Navy SEAL actors,....don't expect to see a "Morgan Freeman" acting film. Expect to see something real.
Halo: Helljumper (2012)
just, eh. something to watch when your really bored.
okay, i get that this is a fan made series and all, but come on guys, you can do so much better than this. ill try to list the pros and cons orderly.
Pro's:
-great costuming. obviously spent a ton of time on that. -decent acting. -good music. -good quality video and sound -surprisingly good alien and battleship animation
Con's:
-cinematography sucks. I feel no excitement for the action scenes. The choreography difference between static, dialogue, and action scenes is just not there, its all the same. they focused more on the costumes and less on what was actually important, the film itself. -the SIMPLE effects are atrocious. (muzzle flashes, plasma, simple, simple things I learned to do better when I was 10.) You would be surprised how the little things can be of such BIG importance. -some acting is bad, but thats to be expected.
All in all, this is just rated as a 2, even as an independent film. they just didn't focus on what was important, which was the story and the film itself. The ONLY reason this is rated so high is because of all the little Halo nerds who know nothing about film. Take this review to heart since its from an actual aspiring Filmmaker and not a little kid getting a hard on because its Halo
The Vow (2012)
Clichéd and cheesy but still a good film.
okay, so i went with my gf to see this, since i drag her to every war/action film that i can. this film is very clichéd and cheesy, but hey its actually a good movie. your going to see a romance movie,....their all the exact same dude. girl is in love, something happens, girls not in love anymore, guy wins her back, happy ending for all. its just how romance works.
but, since i want to be a film director, I have to be honest. SOME of the performances played by Tatum and McAdams are great and awesome and fantastic,....but ever since i left the movie I have been noticing things. a lot of the emotions and feelings are very forced, and you can see it in their faces. I mean, at least do another take of the scene and get it right? but anyways,...
most, if not all, of the actions that Paige makes after the accident are predictable as all Hell. You KNOW what will happen before it happens. But, its a romance chick flick, what were you expecting?
and lastly, every single one of these brain injury, memory loss love stories are so clichéd in the fact that every doctor plays stupid about it. If you are gonna be a brain doctor, I am pretty sure that brain injuries are the first to learn on the list. I don't know, maybe its just me.
all in all, its actually a good film