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Orozco el embalsamador (2001)
A Somber Reflection on Violence
Orozco the Embalmer (2001) 6/10: This documentary offers a gritty and sorrowful look into the life of an embalmer in Colombia, a country fraught with violence. While it's not technically horror, the raw footage of Orozco performing his craft on countless murder victims is deeply unsettling. The film focuses more on the context of death than the embalming itself, highlighting how violence permeates everyday life in a dangerous environment. The relentlessly bleak mood is somewhat undercut by the awkward, grating soundtrack, which feels out of place. As the film draws to a close, Orozco's story ends on a mysterious, unresolved note, making it even more haunting. It leaves viewers contemplating the brutal realities and complex emotional weight Orozco must bear and what the heck happened to him really. While the documentary is thought-provoking, the slow pace and tonal dissonance from the soundtrack might not be for everyone.
Milk & Serial (2024)
Found Footage Done Right
The film's atmosphere captures a raw, gritty vibe, blurring the line between what's playful and what's unsettling. It's smartly paced, offering just enough time to figure out the ambiguity before diving deep into the darker side of things. The interplay between the characters creates an engaging dynamic, and the found-footage style enhances the believability, making it feel like you're unraveling the truth alongside them. The tension builds gradually, but once the facade drops, it gets uncomfortable in the best way. It's refreshing how it doesn't overstay its welcome, staying concise while maintaining suspense. "What do you mean you don't like it?"
The Fog (1980)
Chilly Revenge on the Coast
The setup is interesting enough-a coastal town celebrates its centennial just as a mysterious fog rolls in, bringing with it a vengeful leper spirit. The plot revolves around a curse, and now the ghosts return to collect six lives as retribution. While the concept of ghostly revenge is cool, the movie's slow pacing left me disengaged at times. There's tension, sure, but the characters' responses to the fog felt a little underwhelming. I wanted more depth in their reactions to the horror surrounding them. Maybe it's just that I didn't connect with the mystery as much as I'd hoped, despite some solid scenes and eerie atmosphere. The Mist is more like it in terms of execution and tension.
Stir of Echoes (1999)
Thriller with Supernatural Hints
The story follows a guy who gains psychic abilities after being hypnotized, leading to eerie visions linked to a local mystery. While there are supernatural aspects, the film leans heavily into the thriller genre rather than horror. The protagonist becomes fixated on uncovering the truth behind these visions, uncovering dark secrets in the process. A standout scene involving a chilling hypnotism sets the tone, but the film struggles with pacing afterwards. There are moments of tension and suspense, but overall, it may not grip you all the way through if you're looking for consistent scares. Still, the mystery has its merits and keeps you guessing until the end.
Stream (2024)
Fun Concept, But a Bit Overlong
The film mixes familiar horror elements with a fresh concept, offering some inventive scares. However, it struggles to maintain consistent momentum. A tighter narrative or some more dynamic pacing could have made this feel sharper. Some moments stand out and suggest it could have been something bigger if explored further. It's not the kind of movie you'd rave about, but it's entertaining enough to watch with a group or for a late-night horror fix. Despite its length, the unique premise and occasional eerie atmosphere kept me curious about how things would unfold, though it didn't always deliver.
Vampire humaniste cherche suicidaire consentant (2023)
Unique and Surprisingly Heartfelt
This film offers a fresh twist on the vampire genre, blending heartfelt moments with a unique premise. It does a great job at balancing humor with darker themes, making it more than just a quirky concept. The characters feel well-developed and help keep you engaged, even through some slower sections. While the pacing lags here and there, the overall experience is enjoyable and keeps you rooting for the protagonists. The unexpected warmth in the relationships gives the movie a charm that sets it apart from more traditional vampire stories. Definitely worth checking out if you're after something a bit different!
Hostile Dimensions (2023)
Confusing and Overstuffed
This film tries to explore the idea of doors as portals into different dimensions but ends up feeling longer than necessary. The plot becomes muddled, making it hard to track which character is which and what everyone's goals are. Some moments had potential, but they got lost in the chaos. The characters didn't feel fleshed out, which made it difficult to engage with their journeys. While I appreciate the attempt at creativity, it ultimately fell flat and didn't leave a lasting impression. It's an okay watch, but definitely not my favorite. I found myself waiting for something more exciting to happen, but it just didn't deliver.
Slice (2018)
A Silly Slice of Fun
This movie is a playful blend of comedy and horror that asks for some suspension of disbelief right from the start. It has a lighthearted, '80s horror vibe that's not particularly scary but doesn't lean too heavily into the joke either. The humor often hits the right notes without feeling forced, thanks to the fantastic cast of some of my favorite comedy actors. Their comedic timing and delivery elevate the material, making the experience all the more enjoyable. While it might not be groundbreaking, it's a fun ride that delivers laughs and entertainment. Perfect for a casual watch with friends who appreciate quirky humor, this film is a delightful escape that's easy to enjoy without overthinking it!
Visceral: Entre las cuerdas de la locura (2012)
BDSM shock value only
Not for the squeamish. It's an intense gore-fest that blends boxing with complete psychotic breakdowns, and it doesn't hold back. The violence is extreme, and the plot gets lost in the chaos. It feels like it's more about shock value than telling a cohesive story. The practical effects were impressive in their gruesomeness, but at some point, it became hard to care about the characters. I could see how this might appeal to hardcore fans of extreme horror, but for me, it leaned way too far into torture and madness without much substance to balance it out. The constant overdone gore and disjointed scenes left little room for actual tension.
The Scary of Sixty-First (2021)
Unsettling, But Not in the Right Way
While the giallo influence may have been intentional, it didn't land for me. The conspiracy-driven plot combined with ritual horror was more frustrating than eerie. The constant tonal shifts, including the off-putting audio choices, made it feel more awkward than unsettling. I kept wondering if the weirdness was part of the charm for fans of this style, but it just didn't click. If you're into offbeat horror that pushes the boundary of strange, it might be for you, but I found myself distracted by how rough it all felt.
Even with its strange premise, it felt like it was trying too hard to shock rather than build suspense. The Epstein conspiracy angle didn't add depth, and I kept waiting for something to pay off that never did. Overall, it's a miss for me.
Hell Hole (2024)
A Wild Ride of Absurdity
Leans fully into its absurdity, delivering a campy monster that's hilariously phallic. The laws of bodily physics are nonexistent, and the characters make baffling decisions. Rather than taking the sensible route-like in "The Autopsy" from Guillermo del Toro's Cabinet of Curiosities, where burning the host body was the smart move, everyone here stumbles through with weak judgment. The soundtrack only adds to the forced mood, making things even more ridiculous. While the comedic tone was intentional, it didn't quite land for me. If you're looking for cheesy fun with a horror twist, it's a wild ride worth the laughs, but not for everyone.
Route 666 (2001)
Ghosts, Zombies, and Confusion Collide
While it's technically a zombie movie, it leaned more into a haunted road, ghost revenge story that was hard to get into. It was hard to stay engaged when the characters did things that made no sense, making it tough to suspend disbelief. The mix of ghostly revenge and action felt off, and even the scares were underwhelming. The pacing dragged, and the moments that were supposed to be tense just came across as flat. It tries to combine horror and action but never quite gets anywhere. The characters' bizarre decisions only made it more confusing. Unless you're into quirky early 2000s B-movies with some head-scratching moments, it's one to skip.
Ren tou dou fu tang (2001)
Super Weird and Sloppy
This one's a strange ride. The quality feels like something out of the 80s, even though it came out in 2001. I understand it's based on the Hello Kitty murder case, but the way it was put together feels scattered. Random scenes pop up that have nothing to do with the main story and feel totally out of place. It's a messy mix of unsettling moments and confusing side plots that never fully come together. Even as a shock horror film, it doesn't land the impact it should have. It could've worked better with a tighter focus on the true crime aspect or at least some more cohesive direction. Definitely a peculiar watch.
The Visitor (2022)
Right in the Middle
This movie lands squarely between good and bad-nothing too special, but not terrible either. The story was fairly easy to guess, and it didn't leave much of a lasting impression. It's the kind of film you can watch without feeling strongly one way or the other. While it had a few engaging moments, it never really managed to elevate itself beyond a straightforward, average thriller. The performances were decent, and the cinematography had its moments, but overall, there just wasn't much that set it apart. It's fine if you're in the mood for something simple and undemanding, but don't expect anything groundbreaking.
Prisoners of the Ghostland (2021)
Visually Unique but Unbalanced
Bizarre Japan-Western aesthetic which could have been interesting if not for how every single Asian character was relegated to the background. The primary and secondary roles were all white, with one North African exception. Nic Cage brings his typical intensity, but ultimately, this movie just felt like a fun little action-fantasy rather than anything with depth. Despite its horror label, it doesn't deliver on that front-it's more of a wild, genre-bending ride with some memorable visuals and over-the-top moments that are entertaining if you don't take it too seriously. A good watch for a Nic Cage night, but not much beyond that.
The Once and Future Smash (2022)
A Fine Tribute to Cult Horror
This film was a fine experience overall, especially if you're into quirky meta-commentary about cult horror. It centers around the fictional legacy of "End Zone 2" and succeeds in crafting a world that feels steeped in nostalgia. For me, the real highlight was seeing Michael St. Michaels again-his presence added an enjoyable and familiar touch. The interviews with real people from the horror world gave it an authentic vibe that horror fans will appreciate. While it may not be revolutionary, there's a certain charm to "revisiting" these characters, and it's a solid watch for fans who enjoy a niche, self-aware take on genre history. Even if it wasn't completely for me, it still has its merits.
Art of a Hit (2024)
A Film with Unique Moments and Charm
I found it through my library on Hoopla, which I think is really cool and notable-it's great when smaller films are accessible like that. The concept of "Art of a Hit" is intriguing: a quirky producer, a band hoping for their big break, and a mysterious castle setting. There are moments of suspense, with the producer delivering surprise appearances that add a bit of fun to the story.
Though the pacing felt a bit slow for my taste and I found myself getting bored, it's evident that a lot of effort went into bringing this idea to life. The film has unique quirks that make it charming in its own way, even if it didn't quite keep me fully engaged throughout. For those who appreciate unconventional storytelling and distinct atmospheres, it could be a hidden gem. While I personally didn't connect with it as much as others seem to, I recognize that this film may resonate more with certain audiences. It serves as a reminder that film ratings are subjective, and what might not click for one person can be a rewarding experience for another.
El hoyo 2 (2024)
A Solid Return to the Tower of Despair
Good revisit to the tower prison and the aftermath of the first movie. It maintains the unsettling atmosphere of the original while expanding on the story's lore, diving deeper into the social dynamics and moral decay within the prison. The new characters bring a fresh perspective, and the themes of inequality and survival are just as impactful, though some plot points felt a bit confusing. Also, no one can tell me Perempuán wasn't Natalie Jean and Zamiatin isn't Henry Zebrowski. I started watching in English dub for about 15 minutes, thanks to Netflix's auto-settings, before I remembered the original was in Spanish-switching back made it much better. After finishing, I looked up the wiki for more clarity on the plot, but the description was vague, which led me to check the release date and realize it had just come out yesterday. Oops! Someone remind me to revisit that page later. Overall, it's a worthy sequel, capturing the bleak essence of the first film while pushing the narrative forward, even if it doesn't quite reach the same level of intensity.
The Devil Inside (2012)
Another Forgettable Exorcism Flick
Got really bored on this one. "The Devil Inside" is the same exorcism movie you've seen a million times, complete with all the tired cliches. The demon knows everyone's names, brings up all the bad stuff they did, and then mysteriously kills everyone-nothing new to see here. The lack of originality makes it feel like a rehash of better films, with no real scares or fresh takes to keep you engaged. The uninspired story and predictable twists make it more of a slog than a scare, leaving you waiting for something that never delivers. Even the ending is abrupt and unsatisfying, adding to the disappointment. Yawn.
Bats (1999)
A Fun, Self-Aware Creature Feature
A little hard to pay attention to at times, but "Bats" has its good moments. It's a classic creature feature that doesn't take itself too seriously, leaning into the campy charm of its premise. The film embraces genre tropes with a self-aware approach, often tagging scenes with a metaphorical "just kidding" that adds to the entertainment. Though it might not hold your focus the whole way through, it delivers enough laughs and thrills for fans of lighthearted horror, especially those who enjoy nostalgic '90s monster movies. The playful tone keeps it engaging, making it an enjoyable, if not entirely gripping, entry in the genre.
Dear David (2023)
From Creepy Start to Unintentional Comedy
Started kinda neat, with an intriguing setup that captures the unsettling atmosphere of its origins, but "Dear David" gradually veers off track. As the story unfolds, the tension diminishes, replaced by unintentionally funny moments that turn the scares into laughs. By the time the very silly ending arrives, it's hard to take any of it seriously. While fans of the original viral thread may still find some fun in the familiarity, it ultimately feels more like a nostalgia piece than a genuine horror experience, lacking the impact needed to stand on its own. Still not as bad as most people say though.
The Substance (2024)
A Refined Take on Body Horror
The bloated and beautifully mutated embodiment of true body horror-a masterful blend of plot, gore, and purpose that elevates the genre. It's a well-crafted cocktail for those tired of the bottom-shelf shots of meaningless splatterfests. Every grotesque detail serves a narrative function, making it a must-watch for fans who crave more depth behind the visceral imagery. While it's a little on the nose at times, its never too blunt with its allegory on women's struggles in entertainment and keeping current. It's a disturbing yet thoughtful experience that stays with you long after the credits roll.
Terrifier 2 (2022)
Bloody Spectacle That Overstays Its Welcome
There are some great additions, like the eerie Little Pale Girl, but it suffers from serious pacing issues. The runtime is almost 40 minutes too long, and the story could have been tighter without losing impact. The practical effects are well done, delivering impressive splatter, but much of the excessive gore fails to further the plot. The movie delivers the over-the-top violence fans expect, but the excessive length makes it feel bloated at times. I found myself bored with the weird pauses and predictable moves. Overall, it's a bloody good time, but it could benefit from some sharper editing.
Creepypasta (2023)
Channel Zero sans spirit
It's disappointing when adaptations like this stray from the essence of classic creepypastas. There's already a GREAT anthology of creepypastas and it's called Channel Zero. The original stories had intricate narratives and psychological depth so I have no idea why someone (several someones) thought they could use the namesake Creepypasta for something as dull as video after video of overcooked jumpscares and dragging victims into the darkness. Maybe one or two of the vignettes was fine (the flashlight one comes to mind) but even then I would not recommend this to anyone who came for the pasta. I don't think a single one of these was based on a real classic creepy pasta. If they really wanted to use "Creepypasta" they really should have leaned the other way and made "who was phone" and stories of that ilk.
Seoulgoedam (2022)
Unsatisfying
All the tiktok and instagram videos hyped it so hard and then when you finally get to watch it, it's just one disappointing ending after another. Each story idea is good but then they are all told in a rush and you're left thinking "ok maybe the next one is worth it" and it isn't. Perhaps the only ones that are just fine are "Tunnel" "Necromancy" and "A Mannequin". Maybe I'm missing something but all the other ones are either so unclear or so missing the mark on originality that they fall short. I was really hoping for one to get me like "WHOA what a great story" but it was just kinda... wack.