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j-nickturner
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The Suicide Squad (2021)
Yikes.
Had high hopes for this because of James Gunn. This was bizarre. It felt like I was watching a cobbled together edit of an awkward dress rehearsal or something.
What a disappointment.
Good Time (2017)
Wow. Just wow.
Just watch it. Go in blind and watch it.
This was a masterpiece.
The Hive (2014)
An ambitious dumpster fire
Takes itself way too serious and thinks its "deep." It's like if Memento was directed by Jaden Smith. Or maybe a juggalo.
Really cool core concept, but abysmal execution on all fronts. Acting, plot points, dialogue, character development, cinematography.... Oof so bad.
But it ends up being a decent unintentional comedy. It's like watching a neon dumpster fire.
Murder Party (2007)
Starts off strong but kinda fizzles out
Overall, I enjoyed this. The characters are pretty funny and so is a good amount of the movie.
But the mid section and the end kinda drag without many jokes or action.
Probably would've made a better short film. I'd say 30 minutes or so could've been cut and the movie would've been better for it. Still worth a watch though!
Hagazussa (2017)
Don't believe the high scores!
TL:DR: Skip this and watch Estonian folk-tale "November" if you want something similar to "The VVitch." The high scores are from try-hards and liars.
This film is beautifully shot. But that is where the positives stop.
There is absolutely NOTHING about this that is unnerving, uncomfortable, or anything that elicits an emotional response of any kind. The atmosphere is not ominous or foreboding. If the soundtrack were removed, you wouldn't even know what tone this film was going for. (and the soundtrack is literally just 4 notes sliding back and forth) Beautiful cinematography means nothing in a film if it doesn't communicate anything other than impressive composition.
It is NOT a picture of an isolated woman's descent into madness. Its just slow moving shot after shot of a depressed woman continuing to be depressed. The only inkling we get that she may be experiencing some sort of "madness" isn't until the 1:30 mark and the credits roll at 1:37. "Oh but that's the point. Its a snapshot of depression and isolation," you say. Then ask yourself if it was a point that even needed making.
Even the minimal description of the film ("Paranoia & superstition in 15th century Europe") is misleading. There is no paranoia at all. And during the 1:42 runtime, only 4 minutes are less have anything to do with superstition.
I am so tired of people pretending like films like this have any sort of depth. Even calling it pretentious just validates the people who claim they see something in it. I understand that art is subjective, and if truly did enjoy this film, more power to you.
However, I think a lot of you are lying to yourselves and others. Defending art just because it is art does nothing. Don't forget that just because something IS art, doesn't automatically make it GOOD art.
In my opinion, all this was is a cheap attempt to capitalize on some of the more successful slow moving folk horror. A director who knows how to work a camera isn't that unique, especially not when that's literally all they have to offer.
Go watch "The VVitch" or the Estonian folk-tale "November" instead.
Stephanie (2017)
Wow!
This is one of the most original horror/dramas I've seen in a long time. Not only is it unique, but it is also extremely compelling and kicks you right in the feels.
Apart from a midsection that dragged on a bit, I really have no complaints. It's not the scariest movie out there but I really don't think it was trying to be. This is story driven and thankfully the story fantastic!
Also, this has one of the best child performances of any movie out there! The character of Stephanie, played by (then) 11/12 year old Shree Crooks, is what really makes this film work. Yes, the plot is fresh and unique, but she is the star of the show!
I won't get into the plot because I think it's best to go in blind. Let's just say its creative with lots of twists and turns. Not to mention a finale that will have you on the edge of your seat and possibly in tears.
Don't expect a super scary film or a fast-paced thriller. But stick with it to the end. It's worth it.
A very strong 7/10!
Girl on the Third Floor (2019)
Moody drama/horror
I enjoyed this a lot more than I thought I was going to. It's far from perfect, but I found it to be a pretty fun watch overall.
The protagonist, played by C.M. Punk, is not your usual main character for a horror movie. He isn't super likable, but that's kind of the point. He's selfish, prone to angry outbursts, but knows how to fend for himself. Punk's portrayal can be a little stiff here and there, but I thought he did fine. I found his character to be a breathe of fresh air compared to your typical inept screaming idiots we are used to seeing.
I thought the pacing was spot on and I never got bored. But this leads to my biggest complaint.
Although I was never bored, I was also never scared. Kind of a bummer.
However the film doesn't take itself too seriously. Especially not during the climax. It is fully aware of how ridiculous and outlandish the conclusion is. In my opinion, this self-awareness actually makes the ending work really well! It's goofy but still pretty messed up..
Not an incredible film, but definitely works hard to set itself apart with an atypical protagonist, (mostly) unusual plot, and a moody atmosphere that moves along at a good pace.
I give it a solid 6/10.
Deep Dark (2015)
A fail on all fronts. Avoid at all costs.
Not funny enough to be comedy.
Not weird enough to be surreal.
Not scary enough to be horror.
Not smart enough to be clever.
Not well acted enough to be convincing.
If this is supposed to be a commentary on art, it doesn't comment on much of anything. If it is supposed to be horror, nothing scary happens. (Etc. I think you see where I'm going)
The runtime isn't even much longer than an hour and it still drags along like a dead horse pulled behind another horse with only two legs. Maybe, mayyyyybe this could've been a decent short film, but I doubt it because the director has nothing to say.
Not to mention nothing really happens. Take 30 seconds to think of what would happen with a talking hole in the wall in a horror movie. Yup, that's all that happens. Actually probably only a few of the things that you are expecting happen. Read the description and you've seen the movie. Actually, the description is more exciting than the film itself.
I love weird, arthouse horror! Thats what I thought this would be.
It isn't. It's just 79 minutes of uninspired nothingness. There is no climax. There is no message. The movie just ends.
Skip it.
Man Vs. (2015)
Starts strong but the ending is a mess
This had so much potential. But pacing issues, a special effects disaster, and a terrible ending completely spoil the fun. Also, it is never, not once ever, scary.
There were a few things that made this feel somewhat fresh as far as the whole lost in the woods with something after you thing. Unfortunately, those fresh ideas don't come together well and the climax is a joke. Like laugh out loud bad.
Now I'm all for a slow burn and that's what I expected this to be. However, when it starts to pick up, it drops the ball big time. Honestly, not much happens, even during the climax. I mean nothing exciting happens... Nothing interesting, nothing new. It completely changes tones and feels like a different movie.
Some films can pull this tone change off, but not "Man Vs." I think to pull this off you need a mind-blowing twist, but there's no twist here at all. The movie THINKS it has a twist... But it doesn't. It's just a logical progression of what the poster tells you is going to happen.
I understand that this was filmed on a low-budget, but if you don't have the budget for good CGI, don't use a completely CGI creature in broad daylight... There are plenty of examples even on YouTube of kids making a scary creature on no budget. The key is to know your limitations and work with them. "Man Vs" ignores its limitations and shoots itself in the foot in the process.
Very disappointing and overall pretty lame. I think as a whole, it is slightly below average. Which is a massive bummer because it could have been great.
The Descent (2005)
Pretty good
I don't think this is a masterpiece like some people do. It's starts off great but by the midway point, it kinda blows it's load. All the tension and build up devolves into a typical, high octane creature feature. The first half feels like horror, second half feels like gory action/adventure. Not necessarily a bad thing, just had potential that I don't think was capatilized on.
However, most of the film is tense, claustrophobic, and gritty. I also think that the characters are well written and well acted. It's manages to be a compelling drama in the midst of all the chaos.
In the end this is more of a dramatic action story with horror elements. The horror aspect stopped being scary after the halfway point and that kind of bummed me out.
The conclusion is fantastic though! All in all, a really well made film!
They're Inside (2019)
Meh
Found Footage "The Strangers" without any of the cat and mouse. The home invaders are just not scary. They barely even toy with the cast... and all their dialogue is cringey.
There are a bunch of scenes of a predator cat (I think its cheetah) stalking its prey with classical music played over it interjected into the film. Ooooo so artsy... Why don't you just show us the actual antagonists stalking their prey. All we get is a cut phone line and a car that won't start. I've seen that a hundred times before in much better movies.
I think they were trying to make it more of a character drama, but even that side of things isn't compelling at all.
Oof... and that ending... What a cringe fest.
Actually now that I'm really thinking about it, the whole thing is pretty bad.
The Monster Project (2017)
Hard to watch. Where they even trying?
Ridiculous overacting and a terrible script.
Found Footage is my favorite genre, but this was absolutely insulting.
This film has no idea what it wants to be. Every cliche in the book makes an appearance here. Including cheap jump scares (with that annoying "BWAAAAAH" sound effect every time they want to startle you). There are soooooo manyyyyy jump scares. The most pathetic part about them, is that they don't even startle you... How can you fail at using the cheapest shock tactic ever invented?! And I even startle easy...
Don't even get me started with the characters and the dialogue. The acting is excruciating, even embarrassing. Christ, what happened here?
This was such a cool idea, but its completely spoiled by some of the laziest execution and messiest script-writing I've ever seen.
You can't even enjoy it as a so-bad-its-good way. It just plain sucks. I hope to God the director just calls it quits after this abomination.
There are so many plot holes. Why would an off duty cop still wear a body cam? Why did reciting the lords prayer count as a full exorcism? Why did the black actor agree to such a stereotypical character role? Why is there a soundtrack track? Why did I watch this? Why was this movie made? Etc.
Oh, and oxy doesn't dilate your pupils. It constricts them. Jesus, do some research.
Occult Angel (2018)
Wildy ambitious and triumphant.
People are reviewing this as if it were a big budget Hollywood production. Take it for what it is, make some allowances for the fact that it was made on a shoe-string budget by a young, independent filmmaker.
Yes, the acting is often stiff. Yes, it does often have an amateur feel. But the director clearly has a lot of talent and manages to weave a gripping web of supernatural/occult mystery. (Not to mention plenty of pretty freaky/scary moments.)
This is one of the most unique found footage/mockumentary films I've ever seen! From the get go, I was sucked into the story and there was never a dull moment.
I was incredibly impressed and I'm hoping to see more (possibly even a sequel) from this director. In my opinion, this is an instant classic and breathes new life into a genre filled with a lack of originality.
The Black Water Vampire (2014)
A breath of fresh air for fans of found footage
"The Black Water Vampire" accomplishes everything it set out to do. Not that it has the most original script or anything, but the execution is spot on.
There are no lazy jump scares and the pacing never drags. In my opinion, there was no wasted screen time and I was never bored. It's not super terrifying or anything but there are some good scary moments.
My only complaint is that for some reason... They used a soundtrack... and it wasn't even a good one. It added absolutely nothing to the experience and slightly cheapened the feel of the film. It would've been a lot better off without it.
Oh and the very last scene was a little goofy. But I think they stuck the landing.
If you are a fan of indie FF horror, you will most likely enjoy it. If found footage isn't your jam, it probably won't change your mind. It's worth a shot though!
The Hunted (2013)
Great, but flawed found footage romp
TL;DR: I really enjoyed this one! Solid acting, pacing, atmosphere, and cinematography. Unfortunately, it commits so major FF sins. (Strong 6/10)
"The Hunted" is the directorial debut of Josh Stewart (who also wrote the script and stars in the film). He crafts a dense and moody atmosphere that creates a lasting sense of dread and keeps you glued to the screen. The film manages to be pretty creepy and features two main characters who are, thankfully, not incompetent fools. I was impressed and relieved to see that this wasn't going to be just another typical found footage horror. The script is smart and knows exactly what it wants to be/do. I was never bored and never felt like I was watching an amateur project.
Also, the audio is mixed extremely well! Every bit of audio feels like it was captured by the camera's internal mic. Never once did they just slap a bunch of digital sound effects on in post. At least not that I could tell. This is one thing that helps the atmosphere feel so tense and creepy.
However...
There are 2 key flaws:
1. While the mood is dense, visceral and creepy... Every. Single. Scare... is a jump scare (with large variations/sudden jumps in volume). Yes, the atmosphere is near perfect, but its such a shame that all that build up, all that tension and all of the attention to detail is spoiled by cheap jump scares with little variety. They had so much going for them and they resorted to the oldest trick in the book. Dear filmmakers, jump scares are not "scary." All they do is startle you, not terrify you. So much potential wasted on lazy jumps.
2. For some reason, they used a freakin soundtrack... Why, why, why do so many found footage directors keep slapping on soundtracks? This film could have easily stood on its own without it and it would've been better for it. I will give it credit and say that it was fairly unique and fit the theme of hunters in the woods. But soundtracks Do Not belong in FF. If you want to use a soundtrack, use a traditional narrative style of filming. Period.
Despite these major gripes, I still think the film had enough going for it to mostly transcend its flaws. But it had the potential to be so much more than the final product.
Overall, I'd recommend it to any FF junky. I enjoyed it quite a bit and it is well above the average FF indie flick. Especially when you consider that this is the director's first feature film.
Afflicted (2013)
Above average but not amazing
Cool concept, great special effects, interesting (but not totally satisfying) ending. Unfortunately, the trailer and description of the film spoils 90% of the movie. You pretty much know what's coming so the film is more about the characters/ the journey.
The story concept feels fresh, but I still found it to be a little lackluster and forgettable. I felt that the script had a clear vision for the film, but needed to trim some of the fat. There were a few pacing issues with several scenes that felt kind of redundant. The ending is pretty neat and I could tell what they were going for, but it felt a little bit anti-climactic.
Like I said earlier, the film gave itself away in its marketing. This means that nothing really surprises you because you've already been given too much information about what's coming. While the special effects are impressive, the cinematography is decent, and the acting is mostly solid, that's really all you get.
Overall, it's an enjoyable watch. Definitely better than most found footage, but not all that memorable. A solid popcorn indie offering, but nothing spectacular.
Followers (2017)
Not as bad as some say but...
...I agree that it should've been a short film. The story could've been told in half the time and would have been way much effective.
I also think the film tries to do waaaay too much. However, I think its definitely a commendable effort with a smart script (apart from pacing and a few preachy moments). The way the film connects some of the events are kind of clever, but it ultimately serves no real purpose. But I appreciate that the filmmakers actually spent some time developing the characters. (They just spent way too long doing it.)
"Followers" is no where near the train wreck that others are saying it is. Unfortunately, the bloated pacing and the amount of story beats/plot points crammed in hold it back from being great. I know saying it should've been shorter and then saying it has too much going on might sound contradictory. If you watch it you'll understand.
Overall, I give props to the makers for trying to set their project apart from the rest of indie found footage. It just doesn't hold your attention or stick the landing.
Cause of my Death (2016)
Terrible Script/Execution. Avoid at all costs.
TL;DR: Don't bother. There isn't a single redeemable quality to be found.
This indie "horror" drama from writer/director/editor Mark Mos is one of the worst attempts at found footage I have ever seen. The film is boring, features a laughable script, and fails on all fronts.
There are soooo many scenes that do absolutely nothing to advance/enhance the plot. The acting is stiff and awkward (especially the red head who can't seem convincingly scared to save her life). On top of that, the characters are poorly written and kind of annoying. Most of the dialogue is just plain stupid.
When the twist is revealed, you will be laughing your butt off. It's delivered in such a stiff and so-bad-its-funny kind of way. I really don't even know how to describe to you how lazy and stupid the twist feels. I'll admit it was a decent idea, but like all other aspects of the film, it is a total fail.
The editing is nonsensical, confusing, and amateur. There are countless interjections of the same exact static and white noise effect. So many in fact, that I lost count after the first 30 minutes. I wouldn't be so critical if the director was new to the film industry, but his IMDB page says he's been active since at least the late 90's. I haven't seen any of the other projects he has worked on, but "Cause of my Death" appears to be a failed effort from a completely talentless director. (Oh excuse me... director, writer, AND editor...)
We need to talk about the soundtrack... Oh man is it bad. Not only does a soundtrack have no business in a found footage movie, but it significantly cheapens the atmosphere of an already low-grade movie. It's like a bad 80's b-movie and some low-tier, homemade acid house or something.
Terrible film from a no-talent director.
Hide the Monster (2016)
Fresh, creepy, and engaging
I really liked this little found footage indie gem! It's a fresh take on a tired trope (spooky kid) and it's a really enjoyable/creepy watch.
The ending had a cool twist, but was sort of executed a little poorly. It isn't the most satisfying, but I still admire it for knowing how to tie up the story. I probably would have given it an 8/10 if the ending had been a little more consistent with the tone of the rest of the movie.
Overall, I thought this film was great! Give it a try if you like low-budget FF horror.
Digging Up the Marrow (2014)
This is a vanity project disguised as a mockumentary
TL;DR: 3/4 self promotion of director Adam Green and his other works. 1/4 lazy adaptation of Clive Barker's "Nightbreed"
This was a mess. The only saving grace of this movie is the amazing artwork/ creature design of the incredibly talented Alex Pardee. Oh and Ray Wise was pretty great. Unfortunately, that wasn't enough to make the film enjoyable.
There is literally a montage of Green signing autographs... The beginning of the film is supposed to be meaningful. He gets lots of horror celebs to give a short testimonial about their love of the horror genre. But it is really just a montage of Green showing off his connections. This movie screams "Oh look at me! Aren't I cool? I have tons of fans and know lots of famous people."
Half the movie is just Adam and friends wearing t-shirts from his movies surrounded by posters of his movies with a computer screensaver of his movies... Absolutely shameless. There are so many inconsistencies in tone because Green can't stick to the narrative and just has to keep shamelessly showing off and self-promoting.
If he wanted to make an effective mockumentary, he should've cast other actors and left himself out of the spotlight. But he just couldn't help himself. This is a vanity project wearing the guise of a horror film.
Adam Green has always seemed like a hack to me. This film further solidifies that feeling. He comes across as a self-important egomaniac. In interviews he always defends the plot holes and lazy filmmaking decisions of his movies with circular reasoning and 4th wall tapping. Dude, just because you make a self-deprecating joke about portions of your movie or personality, does NOT give you an excuse to keep using lazy scripts and have a sloppy attention to detail.
What a waste of Ray Wise and Alex Pardee...
The Psychics (2019)
Excellent mystery/thriller!
TL;DR: Go in blind and give it a shot! Solid mystery with a great climax. (For fans of low-budget indie Found Footage. But even if FF isn't your jam, I think everyone should try it.)
I was really impressed with this Norwegian indie offering! The script is fully fleshed out with plenty of twists and turns. It cleverly keeps you guessing and tuned in to what's happening. You will constantly be coming up with theories of what's coming next, but you are never certain of what is going on unless the film wants you to know. Not to say that you won't be able to figure certain things out, but you'll have so many theories floating around in your head by the time it happens. And there are certain things that you will just not see coming.
The plot is patient, but focused. Although it is a bit of a slow burn, the pacing never felt like an issue. It moved along fast enough to keep you engaged, but slow enough to let you digest what is happening and keep you on your toes. I was glued to the screen the entire time.
The ending ties everything together nicely and satisfies your curiosity. Finally, a found footage movie that actually knows how to end. Most of these things just kind of fizzle out by the end and leave a bad taste in your mouth. But as I said before, the writer/director knew exactly how he wanted his story to go and it shows in the conclusion.
The performances from the actors are fantastic, especially when considering that this film practically had no budget (from what I understand). I can't think of a single moment of a stiff delivery or distracting dialogue.
My only complaint would probably be the dreaded shaky cam towards the beginning, but it actually did seem to serve a narrative purpose. I just found it a little off putting. Don't worry, the rest of the film features great cinematography. As a matter of fact, some of the shot compositions are beautiful. There was one scene in particular that impressed me where a character is being very stern. The way the shot is set up, with the sunlight accenting her eyes, really helped drive home the serious nature of the scene. It's not often that you get a director of a found footage movie who pays such close attention to detail.
All in all, this an excellent supernatural mystery/thriller from a very talented director. I enjoyed every minute of it and I'll be keeping an eye out for future projects from him.
La Entidad (2015)
Started strong but ran out of ideas
"La Entidad" is well shot, well acted, and most of the special effects are decent. The story had potential, as did the twist, but it quickly becomes repetitive and easy to predict.
There is next to no variation in the scary parts. The same thing just happens over and over and over again to the point where you become desensitized. It loses all effectiveness before the halfway point. Clearly, the creators had a good idea for a premise but should have spent more time fleshing out the script.
Another case of a half-baked feature length found footage film that should have only been about 45-50 minutes long.
Another thing that bothered me was that nearly every time the camera cuts to another POV or scene, there is a quiet burst of digital white noise. It got annoying really quickly and served absolutely no purpose. Also, the sound of the entity was not mixed into the audio well. It was clearly just digital effects added in post. There is a way to make it seem like its actually happening within the world of the movie, but it was just your typical "spooky whispering" with lots of reverb and cliche monster noises slapped on top of the recorded audio.
Not terrible, but kind of a waste of time.
The Bell Witch Haunting (2013)
Painfully below average.
I love found footage, but this movie blows chunks. It has nothing new to offer and the use of obvious digital sound effects that don't come from the cameras internal mic drove me crazy. Quintessential "Oh we can just add it in post" type directing.
Considering the source material, you'd think the director would've put more effort into using it. But no, its just a poorly assembled, repetitive mess that uses every tired old cliche from the genre to pad the runtime. (Some of which is laughably stupid. I'm looking at you Mr. Electrician) However, the lack of originality is not the real problem here. Cliched tropes can be executed well. The problem is that they don't really mean anything. It's just a bunch of set pieces that feel pointless and lazy. So when things happen, you just can't be bothered to care.
This is a painful example of a lazy script capitalizing on a famous legend and a cheap format. Feels like the legend of the bell witch source material was just used for an easy cash grab. The lore was barely even explored. It basically amounted to "hey there was a witch here once." Ok... what did she want? Why is she still messing about? What kind of stuff was she doing when she was alive? "Nah she's just a ghost or whatever." ... ... ... (-_-) ...
MOVIES LIKE THIS ARE WHY PEOPLE DON'T GIVE FOUND FOOTAGE A CHANCE.
Disgraceful.
Always Watching: A Marble Hornets Story (2015)
Youtube series is way better
I'm a pretty big fan of the "Marble Hornets" YouTube series. Gotta say though, this was a pretty big letdown.
None of the personality, intrigue, or clever storytelling of the original series makes it into the movie.
Average at best. But considering how strong the OG stuff was, this is a pile of crap.
Frazier Park Recut (2017)
A little too predictable
Clever in parts, but it gives itself away pretty much from the get go.
Interesting enough to warrant a watch, but it isn't very satisfying.