mgrebenstein
Joined Mar 2014
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Ratings2.9K
mgrebenstein's rating
Reviews3
mgrebenstein's rating
Should be illegal to produce something like this. Gomez is born in 1992, Seeley in 1982. 10 years. 15&26 (or something to that effect). I wouldn't want any person seeing this and thinking it's okay. It's not okay.
The format of the story is working, though not innovative or surprising in any way. Has potential to be fun, you know, dancing, pop star stuff, a first love kind of story. Doesn't work at all if you think about the protagonists. There even is a scene where he sees a video tape of her as a small child praising him in a childish and seemingly 'embarrassing' manner. What's embarrassing is this film and the fact it was made and considered a legitimate attempt to making a teen flick.
**** Warner.
The format of the story is working, though not innovative or surprising in any way. Has potential to be fun, you know, dancing, pop star stuff, a first love kind of story. Doesn't work at all if you think about the protagonists. There even is a scene where he sees a video tape of her as a small child praising him in a childish and seemingly 'embarrassing' manner. What's embarrassing is this film and the fact it was made and considered a legitimate attempt to making a teen flick.
**** Warner.
that this movie is titled "Captain USA - The Iron Soldier" here in Germany. Everyone who paid attention to this piece of c**p (and I pity every soul who witnessed Iron Soldier) should have noticed that its plot is, in fact, set in Canada. One "important" guy even wears a uniform with "Canada" on it and you clearly can recognize the Canadian flag near the end of the movie.
Wait? That's a review? Yes it is! This text started as a comment but I quickly realized that this little anecdote sums up the overall quality of the movie very well. If you have friends who consider Uwe Boll the worst director ever, you should introduce them to His Infernal Majesty of Bad Filmmaking: Brett Kelly (the guy who made Rise of the Black Bat would be a candidate worthy of mention, too).
Seriously: This movie isn't full of plot holes, its plot is one gigantic hole and I'm still searching for the edge. Bad acting. Bad writing. Bad directing. You there, reading this review! Imagine if we team up and try to make a movie with a few friends who are interested in participating in it. We don't really have a script, we just shoot it. Guess what? It would be award-worthy compared to Iron Soldier (unless you are as artistically skilled as Ashton Kutcher).
I'd regret the fact that I paid 0,99 (1,23 USD, 11/29) for it if it weren't as humiliatingly entertaining as it was.
Greetings from Germany & keep enjoying the trash, fellows
Wait? That's a review? Yes it is! This text started as a comment but I quickly realized that this little anecdote sums up the overall quality of the movie very well. If you have friends who consider Uwe Boll the worst director ever, you should introduce them to His Infernal Majesty of Bad Filmmaking: Brett Kelly (the guy who made Rise of the Black Bat would be a candidate worthy of mention, too).
Seriously: This movie isn't full of plot holes, its plot is one gigantic hole and I'm still searching for the edge. Bad acting. Bad writing. Bad directing. You there, reading this review! Imagine if we team up and try to make a movie with a few friends who are interested in participating in it. We don't really have a script, we just shoot it. Guess what? It would be award-worthy compared to Iron Soldier (unless you are as artistically skilled as Ashton Kutcher).
I'd regret the fact that I paid 0,99 (1,23 USD, 11/29) for it if it weren't as humiliatingly entertaining as it was.
Greetings from Germany & keep enjoying the trash, fellows