Four summers ago I spent my entire summer living on the shores of Lake Sebago in the
middle of the woods in Maine. This was my first time going away from home for the entire
summer, and I was nervous and rather mad about going away. I was nervous because I didnt
know anybody who was going to camp. I was also mad at my parents for abandoning me in the
Ali Preston 12/8/2015 12:02 PM
Comment [1]: This
essay
is
a
work
of
expressionism,
which
Fulkerson
talks
about
in
his
article.
I
know
that
I
really
enjoyed
writing
this
essay
because
I
felt
like
I
had
more
freedom
to
be
able
to
talk
about
myself
and
something
that
I
am
incredibly
passionate
about.
middle of the woods far from home without any form of communication other than snail mail.
The day my parents dropped me off at Camp Wohelo I was completely bewildered by the
entire idea of what was about to happen. As the day went on, however, I became more familiar
with the camp and started to make friends. I also found that surprisingly I had starting thinking to
myself that maybe spending the summer in Maine wouldnt be so bad after all. My cabin had the
best view of the lake of any of the cabins in camp. My cabin, Loons, sat right above the dock
looking out over the entire lake at night we would sit out on the dock and watch the sunset.
Sailing became one of my favorite activities at camp. I took sailing classes and even
joined the racing team. Toward the end of the summer, Wohelo was hosting one of the biggest
Ali Preston 11/29/2015 4:07 PM
Comment [2]: I
would
make
this
two
sentences.
I
would
put
a
period
after
lake.
And
then
maybe
talk
about
the
sunsets
and
how
they
looked
reflected
on
the
water.
sailing regattas. I had been working hard all summer to be able to sail in this regatta. I wanted to
sail in it more than anything because being chosen to sail in our regatta was a huge honor. All of
us had all been working hard to prove that we should be the ones to sail and represent our camp.
The night of the selections of what crews would sail in the regatta came. We all gathered
nervously in the meeting building as the counselors announced the skippers and the crews for the
regatta. Two by two they called off names. They halfway through and my name still hadnt been
called. I was beginning to get even more nervous. The counselors were down to the last two
names, and those of us who had not been called were sitting on the edge of our seats. First, the
counselors announced who would be the skipper. After that they announced the crew, and that is
Ali Preston 11/29/2015 4:08 PM
Comment [3]: I
forgot
to
add
were
when I heard my name. I was so proud of myself and really felt as if I had accomplished
something.
The next day was the day of the regatta. When I woke up I could already hear the wind
Ali Preston 11/29/2015 4:18 PM
Comment [4]: I
would
use
an
exclamation
point
to
help
emphasize
how
excited
I
really
was.
howling and knew it was going to be a very windy day for sailing. Getting out of bed I looked
across the lake; everywhere I looked the lake was covered in mini white capped waves. The lake
looked angry as if it was teasing us, daring us to try to keep our boats from capsizing while
sailing. My race wasnt until the end of the day. I sat on the beach and watched as countless
people from different camps capsized and broke boats. By the time my race was about to start, I
was so nervous that I was starting to feel a little sick. I knew my skipper was one of the best, but
I was unsure about whether the combined weight of the two of us would be enough to keep the
boat from capsizing. As soon as the race started, however, I calmed down a little and began to
trust my skipper and our sailing ability. Going around the last buoy we were in second place,
fighting to keep our position. Although we ended up losing our place, we still had fun, and we
learned to trust each other and ourselves. We also learned that in life challenges may appear out
of nowhere causing us to lose ground, but these are something we need to learn to cope with and
recover from.
At camp, I learned to try new things and to control my fear. Camp also helped me to learn
to adjust to different situations. It taught me to use what I know and to depend on myself for
things. Moreover, the experience helped me to become more independent. I think that camp also
really helped me to be able to deal with changing schools to Lancaster Country Day for my
freshman year. Although I still did have a few challenges adjusting to the major change and new
situation, prior to going to camp I would have taken longer to adjust and become happy in my
new situation. Abandoning me at Wohelo was the best thing my parents could have done for
Ali Preston 11/29/2015 4:10 PM
Comment [5]: That
might
be
my
only
every
use
of
a
semicolon
in
a
paper.
I
never
really
learned
how
to
use
them
in
school,
so
I
never
feel
comfortable
using
them.
Ali Preston 11/29/2015 4:21 PM
Comment [6]: I
LOVE
THIS
SENTENCE!
I
think
this
is
one
of
the
strongest
sentences
that
I
have
ever
written.
It
really
gets
the
point
across
and
creates
a
picture
of
how
horrifying
that
lake
looked
that
morning.
Also,
I
was
convinced
that
there
was
a
lake
monster,
so
I
really
didnt
want
to
capsize
my
boat.
Ali Preston 11/29/2015 4:11 PM
Comment [7]: Our
boats
were
really
old
and
easy
to
break.
They
looked
like
giant
floating
bathtubs.
Ali Preston 11/29/2015 4:12 PM
Comment [8]: In
my
original
essay,
I
talked
about
how
we
lost
our
place,
but
I
had
to
edit
it
out
to
make
it
shorter
for
the
college
essay.
I
wish
I
could
find
that
draft.
Somebody
hit
our
boat
and
refused
to
take
their
penalty,
which
is
how
we
ended
up
getting
third.
Ali Preston 12/8/2015 12:04 PM
Comment [9]: Not
having
enough
room
to
get
your
point
across
is
incredibly
frustrating,
especially
when
you
are
trying
to
give
somebody
a
glimpse
of
yourself.
However,
because
I
was
writing
for
a
specific
audience
I
had
to
follow
their
guidelines.
me. I learned that meeting new people and being thrown into new situations isnt a bad thing; its
just part of life. Wohelo helped prepare me to face new situations like transferring to Lancaster
Country Day School, starting my job as a lifeguard and swim instructor, or going off to college
with confidence.
*This is my favorite piece of writing that I have ever done. I feel like my voice as a
writer really started to come out in the essay. The original intent was to write a personal
narrative about any topic that we wanted to. This was originally written during my sophomore
year of high school, but them edited during my senior year to use as my college essay. There
are some aspects of this essay that I would do differently now, however I still absolutely love
this personal narrative and I am very proud of it.
Ali Preston 12/8/2015 11:57 AM
Comment [10]: I
used
a
second
one!
Even
though
Williams
does
not
agree
with
traditional
grammar
instruction,
sometimes
I
wish
I
had
been
given
more
of
it.
That
way
I
might
have
a
better
handle
on
some
confusing
punctuation.
