Gizuxipupasumuvid
Gizuxipupasumuvid
*This	isn’t	an	April	Fools’	prank!*I	had	been	vaguely	aware	of	the	“Fifty	Shades”	trilogy,	described	in	this	Maureen	Dowd	column	as	“bondage-themed	romanticas	that	have	evoked	hysteria,	whipping	up	a	frenzy	with	the	housewives	of	Long	Island	and	rippling	out	from	there.”	They	feature	a	dashing	mogul,	Christian	Grey,	and	the	object	of	his	stern
affections,	the	winsome	Anastasia	Steele.	(The	names	alone	scream	“Crushingly	banal!”)Even	though	I	apparently	live	in	the	epicenter	of	this	phenomenon,	I	had	been	prepared	to	ignore	it.	After	all,	I’m	hardly	in	the	target	demographic.	But	I	saw	in	Dowd’s	column	that	the	first	volume,	“Fifty	Shades	of	Grey,”	contains	a	contract,	so	of	course	in	the
name	of	art	I	had	to	check	it	out.Five	minutes	later	and	$9.99	poorer,	there	before	me	on	my	Kindle	was	the	contract	in	question,	in	chapter	11.	If	I	could	be	bothered	to	read	the	book	itself,	I	might	end	up	with	a	more	rounded	view	of	the	Mr.	Grey.	But	based	on	the	ponderous	and	mealy-mouthed	prose	of	his	contract,	he’s	no	hunka	hunka	burning
S&M	love.	
Ms.	Steele	might	be	at	risk	of	falling	asleep	before	the	first	thwack	of	a	riding	crop,	or	whatever.Grey	is	a	telecommunications	mogul,	and	he	has	evidently	absorbed	the	semi-literate	contract	verbiage	regurgitated	by	his	high-priced	lawyers.	Let’s	consider	just	a	few	of	the	contract’s	failings:Section	3	says		“The	Dominant	and	the	Submissive	agree	and
acknowledge.”	Hmm—two	categories	of	contract	language,	neither	of	them	appropriate.	And	what	do	they	agree	and	acknowledge?	That	“all	that	occurs	under	the	terms	of	this	contract	will	be	consensual.”	That’s	language	of	policy,	suggesting	that	all	acts	will	automatically	be	consensual.	I	don’t	think	so.Section	3	also	says	that	“all	that	occurs	under
the	terms	of	the	contract	…	will	be	subject	to	the	agreed	limits	and	safety	procedures	set	out	in	this	contract.”	Redundant!According	to	section	4,	“The	Dominant	and	the	Submissive	each	warrant	that	they	suffer	from	no	…	illnesses.”	Great—there’s	nothing	like	inappropriate	sales-contract	jargon	to	dampen	ardor.	It	goes	on,	“…	including	but	not
limited	to	HIV,	herpes,	and	hepatitis.”	Grey	really	is	a	fan	of	the	knee-jerk	traditional	usages.Section	4	also	addresses	what	happens	“If	during	the	Term	(as	defined	below)	or	any	extended	term	of	this	contract	either	party	should	be	diagnosed	with”	specified	illnesses.	The	term	references	are	redundant.	And	the	“should”	is	archaic.Section	5	says
“Adherence	to	the	above	warranties,	agreements,	and	undertakings	…	are	fundamental	to	this	contract.	Any	breach	shall	render	it	void	with	immediate	effect	and	each	party	agrees	to	be	fully	responsible	to	the	other	for	the	consequence	of	any	breach.”	I’m	not	familiar	with	the	notion	of	“fundamental	provisions,”	except	perhaps	for	purposes	of
severability	provisions.	And	I’m	not	sure	that	in	this	context	rendering	a	provision	void	on	breach	serves	any	purpose.	And	the	parties	agree	to	be	fully	(rhetorical	emphasis!)	responsible	for	breach?	Is	that	somehow	different	to	what	applies	elsewhere	in	the	contract?Section	7	says	that	Grey	“shall	take	responsibility	for	the	well-being	and	proper
training,	guidance,	and	discipline	of	the	Submissive.”	It	was	inevitable	that	Grey	would	overuse	“shall,”	here	and	elsewhere.	Section	7	also	says	that	Grey	“shall	decide	the	nature	of	such	training,”	but	presumably	this	should	be	language	of	discretion,	not	obligation.Section	9	uses	“is	to”	to	convey	an	obligation	of	the	Submissive.	How	many	different
usages	does	Gray	need	to	use	to	convey	obligations?Section	10	refers	to	“expiry”	of	the	Term.	Hmm,	an	English	usage.	The	first	book	is	ostensibly	set	in	the	U.S.,	but	perhaps	Grey	spent	some	of	his	formative	years	in	an	English	boarding	school,	regularly	administering	“six	of	the	best”	with	enthusiasm.Section	15.3	says	that	“The	Dominant	shall
provide	the	Submissive	with	all	necessary	training	and	guidance	in	how	to	properly	serve	the	Dominant.”	Hey,	wasn’t	that	covered	in	section	7,	as	noted	above?Section	15.10	says	“The	Dominant	shall	not	loan	his	Submissive	to	another	Dominant.”	Abuse	of	defined	terms!	Steele	is	defined	as	“the	Submissive,”	so	there	can	be	no	other	“Submissive.”
Similarly,	Grey	is	defined	as	“the	Dominant,”	so	there	can	be	no	other	“Dominant.”Appendix	1	says	that	Steele	has	to	keep	herself	“shaved	and/or	waxed	at	all	times.”	Does	she	really	want	to	be	both	waxed	and	shaved	at	any	given	time?	Sounds	painful.Enough!	I	can’t	take	any	more.	If	I	were	Ms.	Steele,	I	would	clap	Mr.	Grey	in	irons	and	vigorously
administer	to	him,	for	his	contract-drafting	sins,	a	taste	of	his	own	medicine.	Get	Form	01.	
Edit	your	50	shades	of	grey	contract	pdf	online	Type	text,	add	images,	blackout	confidential	details,	add	comments,	highlights	and	more.	
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DocHub	User	Ratings	on	G2	Handling	paperwork	with	our	comprehensive	and	intuitive	PDF	editor	is	easy.	Make	the	steps	below	to	complete	50	shades	of	grey	contract	pdf	online	quickly	and	easily:	Log	in	to	your	account.	Sign	up	with	your	credentials	or	register	a	free	account	to	test	the	product	before	upgrading	the	subscription.	Import	a
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grey	contract	pdf	completed.	Download	your	modified	document,	export	it	to	the	cloud,	print	it	from	the	editor,	or	share	it	with	other	people	via	a	Shareable	link	or	as	an	email	attachment.	Make	the	most	of	DocHub,	one	of	the	most	easy-to-use	editors	to	quickly	handle	your	documentation	online!	be	ready	to	get	more	Get	form	We	have	answers	to	the
most	popular	questions	from	our	customers.	If	you	can't	find	an	answer	to	your	question,	please	contact	us.	Contact	us	What	should	a	BDSM	contract	contain?	A	contract	specifies	what	each	party	will	and	will	not	do.	It	explains	exactly	what	each	persons	responsibilities	are	and	what	they	entail.	It	will	also	clarify	a	subs	availability:	is	it	part-time,
long-distance,	24	hours	a	day,	seven	days	a	week,	or	complete	power	exchange?	50	shades	of	grey	contract	word	doc	50	shades	of	grey	contract	template	fifty	shades	of	grey	contract	download	50	shades	of	grey	contract	terms	50	shades	of	grey	contract	from	book	50	shades	of	grey	contract	legal	submission	contract	pdf	50	shades	of	gray	contract	pdf
50	shades	of	grey	contract	pdf	no	No	Download	Needed	needed	50	shades	contract	pdf	fifty	shades	of	gray	contract	pdf	50	shades	of	grey	contract	Related	forms	be	ready	to	get	more	Get	form	50	shades	of	gray	contract	If	you	believe	that	this	page	should	be	taken	down,	please	follow	our	DMCA	take	down	process	here	©	2023	DocHub,	LLC	Dear	two
readers	of	this	blog!	In	light	of	the	interest	that	the	Fifty	Shades	of	Grey	motion	picture	premiere	has	generated,	I	thought	it	appropriate	to	reach	for	the	book	and	search	it	for	some	law-related	material.	Given	the	nature	of	the	book,	I	shall	refrain	from	citing	fragments	that	might	include	sexually	explicit	content.	I	shall,	however,	post	and	translate
phrases	that	could	offer	us	some	insight	into	the	phrasing	of	a	contract	in	the	English	language.	Enjoy!!!	:D	to	REFRAIN	FROM	–	powstrzymać	się	od	(to	stop	yourself	from,	to	forgo)	to	CITE	–	powoływać	się	na,	przytaczać	(to	speak	or	write	words	taken	from	a	particular	writer	or	written	work)	SEXUALLY	EXPLICIT	CONTENT	–	materiały	o	treści
erotycznej	(pornography)	the	PHRASING	of	–	(s)formułowanie	(expressing	something	with	a	particular	choice	of	words)	CONTRACT	Made	this	day_________	of	2011	(“The	Commencement	Date”)	BETWEEN	MR.	CHRISTIAN	GREY	of	301	Escala,	Seattle,	WA	98889	(“The	Dominant”)	MISS	ANASTASIA	STEELE	of	1114	SW	Green	Street,	Apartment	7,
Haven	Heights,	Vancouver,	WA	98888	(“The	Submissive”)	CONTRACT	MADE	THIS	DAY	–	umowa	zawarta	MR.	CHRISTIAN	GREY	OF	–	Pan	Christian	Grey	zamieszkały	(residing)	(“THE	DOMINANT”)	–	zwany	dalej	Dominatorem	(later	referred	to	as)	THE	PARTIES	AGREE	AS	FOLLOWS	1	The	following	are	the	terms	of	a	binding	contract	between	the
Dominant	and	the	Submissive.	FUNDAMENTAL	TERMS	2	The	fundamental	purpose	of	this	contract	is	to	allow	the	Submissive	to	explore	her	sensuality	and	her	limits	safely,	with	due	respect	and	regard	for	her	needs,	her	limits	and	her	wellbeing.	3	The	Dominant	and	the	Submissive	agree	and	acknowledge	that	all	that	occurs	under	the	terms	of	this
contract	will	be	consensual,	confidential,	and	subject	to	the	agreed	limits	and	safety	procedures	set	out	in	this	contract.	Additional	limits	and	safety	procedures	may	be	agreed	in	writing.	THE	PARTIES	AGREE	AS	FOLLOWS	–	strony	postanawiają,	co	następuje	(the	parties	have	agreed	on	the	following)	A	BINDING	CONTRACT	–	wiążąca	umowa	(a
contract	which	cannot	be	legally	avoided	or	stopped)	CONSENSUAL	–	dobrowolny,	za	obopólną	zgodą	(unforced)	CONFIDENTIAL	–	poufny	(not	to	be	discussed	with	other	people)	SUBJECT	TO	THE	AGREED	LIMITS	–	z	zastrzeżeniem/	zgodnie	z	uzgodnionych/uzgodnionymi	granicami	SET	OUT	IN	THIS	CONTRACT	–	określonych	w	niniejszej	umowie
(specified	in	this	contract)	4	The	Dominant	and	the	Submissive	each	warrant	that	they	suffer	from	no	sexual,	serious,	infectious	or	life-threatening	illnesses	including	but	not	limited	to	HIV,	Herpes	and	Hepatitis.	If	during	the	Term	(as	defined	below)	or	any	extended	term	of	this	contract	either	party	should	be	diagnosed	with	or	become	aware	of	any
such	illness	he	or	she	undertakes	to	inform	the	other	immediately	and	in	any	event	prior	to	any	form	of	physical	contact	between	the	parties.	TO	WARRANT	–	oświadczać	(to	state)	INCLUDING	BUT	NOT	LIMITED	TO	–	między	innymi	(such	as)	THE	TERM	–	okres	obowiązywania	umowy	(the	duration	of	the	contract)	ANY	EXTENDED	TERM	OF	THIS
CONTRACT	–	w	okresie	obowiązywania	umowy,	który	został	przedłużony	(during	the	prolonged	term	of	the	contract)	IN	ANY	EVENT	–	w	każdej	sytuacji/	w	każdym	przypadku	(always)		PRIOR	TO	–	zanim	dojdzie	do	(before)	5	Adherence	to	the	above	warranties,	agreements	and	undertakings	(and	any	additional	limits	and	safety	procedures	agreed
under	clause	3	above)	are	fundamental	to	this	contract.	Any	breach	shall	render	it	void	with	immediate	effect	and	each	party	agrees	to	be	fully	responsible	to	the	other	for	the	consequence	of	any	breach.	6	Everything	in	this	contract	must	be	read	and	interpreted	in	the	light	of	the	fundamental	purpose	and	the	fundamental	terms	set	out	in	clauses	2-5
above.	ADHERENCE	TO	–	przestrzeganie	(following,	abiding	by,	doing	as	the	contract	says)	WARRANTY	–	oświadczenie	an	assurance,	promise,	or	guaranty	by	one	party	that	a	particular	statement	of	fact	is	true	and	may	be	relied	upon	by	the	other	party)	UNDERTAKING	–	zobowiązanie	(a	formal	promise)		UNDER	CLAUSE	3	ABOVE	–	zgodnie	z
klauzulą	nr	3	niniejszej	umowy	(according	to	clause	3)	ANY	BREACH	SHALL	RENDER	IT	VOID	–	każde	naruszenie	niniejszej	umowy	prowadzi	do	jej	unieważnienia	(if	any	rule	is	broken,	the	contract	loses	its	effect)	WITH	IMMEDIATE	EFFECT	–	ze	skutkiem	natychmiastowym	(with	no	delay,	straightaway)	ROLES	7	The	Dominant	shall	take
responsibility	for	the	wellbeing	and	the	proper	training,	guidance,	and	discipline	of	the	Submissive.	He	shall	decide	the	nature	of	such	training,	guidance,	and	discipline	and	the	time	and	place	of	its	administration,	subject	to	the	agreed	terms,	limitations	and	safety	procedures	set	out	in	this	contract	or	agreed	additionally	under	clause	3	above.	8	If	at
any	time	the	Dominant	should	fail	to	keep	to	the	agreed	terms,	limitations	and	safety	procedures	set	out	in	this	contract	or	agreed	additionally	under	clause	3	above	the	Submissive	is	entitled	to	terminate	this	contract	forthwith	and	to	leave	the	service	of	the	Dominant	without	notice.	9	Subject	to	that	proviso	and	to	clauses	2-5	above	the	Submissive	is
to	serve	and	obey	the	Dominant	in	all	things.	Subject	to	the	agreed	terms,	limitations	and	safety	procedures	set	out	in	this	contract	or	agreed	additionally	under	clause	3	above	she	shall	without	query	or	hesitation	offer	the	Dominant	such	pleasure	as	he	may	require	and	she	shall	accept	without	query	or	hesitation	his	training,	guidance	and	discipline
in	whatever	form	it	may	take.	ENTITLED	TO	TERMINATE	THE	CONTRACT	FORTHWITH	–	przysługuje	jej	prawo	do	natychmiastowego	rozwiązania	niniejszej	umowy	(can	get	out	of	this	contract	straightaway)	WITHOUT	NOTICE	–	bez	uprzedniego	powiadomienia	(without	having	to	inform	someone	in	advance)	AS	HE	MAY	REQUIRE	–	zgodnie	z	jego
potrzebami	(according	to	what	he	needs)	COMMENCEMENT	AND	TERM	10	The	Dominant	and	Submissive	enter	into	this	contract	on	The	Commencement	Date	fully	aware	of	its	nature	and	undertake	to	abide	by	its	conditions	without	exception.	11	This	contract	shall	be	effective	for	a	period	of	three	Calendar	Months	from	The	Commencement	Date
(“The	Term”).	On	the	expiry	of	The	Term	the	parties	shall	discuss	whether	this	contract	and	the	arrangements	they	have	made	under	this	contract	are	satisfactory	and	whether	the	needs	of	each	party	have	been	met.	Either	party	may	propose	the	extension	of	this	contract	subject	to	adjustments	to	its	terms,	or	to	the	arrangements	they	have	made
under	it.	In	the	absence	of	agreement	to	such	extension	this	contract	shall	terminate	and	both	parties	shall	be	free	to	resume	their	lives	separately.	COMMENCEMENT	AND	TERM	–	początek	i	okres	obowiązywania	umowy	(the	beginning	and	duration	of	the	contract)	TO	ABIDE	BY	THE	CONDITIONS	–	podporządkować	się	warunkom	(to	follow	the
rules)	THE	EXPIRY	OF	THE	TERM	–	termin	wygaśnięcia	umowy	(coming	to	an	end)	IN	THE	ABSENCE	OF	–	w	przypadku	braku	(if	there	is	no)	AGREEMENT	TO	SUCH	EXTENSION	–	zgoda	na	przedłużenie	okresu	obowiązywania	umowy	(saying	yes	to	making	the	contract	last	longer)	THIS	CONTRACT	SHALL	TERMINATE	–	niniejsza	umowa	zostanie
rozwiązana	(this	contract	will	lose	its	effect)	[...]	CONCLUSION	21	We	the	undersigned	have	read	and	understood	fully	the	provisions	of	this	contract.	We	freely	accept	the	terms	of	this	contract	and	have	acknowledged	this	by	our	signatures	below	________________________	The	Dominant:	Christian	Grey	Date	________________________	The	Submissive:
Anastasia	Steele	Date	WE	THE	UNDERSIGNED	–	Podpisani	poniżej	(those	who	signed	the	document	below)	PROVISIONS	OF	THIS	CONTRACT	–	postanowienia	niniejszej	umowy	(terms	of	the	contract)	HAVE	ACKNOWLEDGED	THIS	BY	OUR	SIGNATURES	BELOW	–	co	potwierdzamy	własnoręcznymi	podpisami	(confirm	that	by	signing	the	document)
APPENDIX	1	RULES	[...]	Exercise:	The	Dominant	shall	provide	the	Submissive	with	a	personal	trainer	four	times	a	week	in	hour-long	sessions	at	times	to	be	mutually	agreed	between	the	personal	trainer	and	the	Submissive.	The	personal	trainer	will	report	to	the	Dominant	on	the	Submissive’s	progress.	Personal	Hygiene/Beauty:	The	Submissive	will
keep	herself	clean	and	shaved	and/or	waxed	at	all	times.	The	Submissive	will	visit	a	beauty	salon	of	the	Dominant’s	choosing	at	times	to	be	decided	by	the	Dominant,	and	undergo	whatever	treatments	the	Dominant	sees	fit.	All	costs	will	be	met	by	the	Dominant.	[...]	APPENDIX	–	załącznik	(an	enclosure)	SHALL	PROVIDE	THE	SUBMISSIVE	WITH	–
zobowiązuje	się	zapewnić	Uległej	(promises	to	give	the	Submissive)	AT	TIMES	TO	BE	MUTUALLY	AGREED	BETWEEN	–	w	terminach	uzgodnionych	pomiędzy	(when	it	is	suitable	for	both)	AND/OR	–	lub	AT	ALL	TIMES	–	w	trakcie	obowiązywania	umowy	(while	the	contract	is	on)	OF	THE	DOMINANT’S	CHOOSING	–	który	wybierze	Dominator	(chosen
by	the	Dominant)	TO	BE	DECIDED	BY	THE	DOMINANT	–	które	zostaną	określone	przez	Dominatora	(which	will	be	specified	by	the	Dominant)	THE	DOMINANT	SEES	FIT	–	które	Dominator	uznaje	za	odpowiednie	(which	Dominant	finds	to	be	proper)	ALL	COSTS	WILL	BE	MET	BY	–	wszystkie	koszty	poniesie	(…	will	pay	for)	Let’s	Read	Fifty	Shades	of
Grey	Contract	(	Explained)	part	2.	It’s	a	double	post	day!		Because	I	decided	to,	that’s	why!		And	because	nothing	happens	in	either	chapter,	so	really	it’s	like	getting	zero	chapters	for	the	price	of	two!	(And	because	I	really	want	to	do	more	original	writing,	and	I’m	hoping	getting	more	FSoG	out	of	the	way	will	motivate	me	to	do	that.)	I	hope	you	like
fakey,	blatantly	illegal	legal	documents,	because	most	of	this	chapter	is	one	of	them!		In	its	entirety!		Right	down	to	the	signature	page	and	appendices!		Because	EROTICA!	Content	warnings	for	this	chapter:	A	legal	document	that	somehow	still	manages	to	incorporate	emotional	and	physical	abuse	and	total	disregard	for	consent.		Also	forced
exercise.	CONTRACT	Made	this	day_________	of	2011	(“The	Commencement	Date”)	BETWEEN	MR.	
BIG	McLARGEHUGE	of	301	Escala,	Seattle,	WA	98889	(“The	Dominant”)	MISS	ANASTASIA	STEELE	of	1114	SW	Green	Street,	Apartment	7,	Haven	Heights,	Vancouver,	WA	98888	(“The	Submissive”)	98889	and	98888	aren’t	real	zip	codes.		I’d	cut	E.L.	James	some	slack	and	say	“well,	it’s	like	putting	555	in	a	phone	number,”	except	that	Escala	is	a
real	building	in	Seattle.		It’s	in	zip	code	98101.		So	it’s	sort	of	weird	to	make	one	up.	
	(Vancouver	zip	codes	are	in	the	986XX	range.)		This	isn’t	really	bad,	just…	unnecessarily	inexplicable.	Oh,	I’m	just	stalling.	Let’s	get	into	this	beast.	THE	PARTIES	AGREE	AS	FOLLOWS	1	The	following	are	the	terms	of	a	binding	contract	between	the	Dominant	and	the	Submissive.	Did	I	mention	this	thing	goes	on	for	fifteen	pages?		There’s	sub-
clauses	and	cross-references.		Never	mind	D/s;	I	think	Bark	DangerStomp	has	a	full-blown	lawyer-play	fetish	going	here.	2	The	fundamental	purpose	of	this	contract	is	to	allow	the	Submissive	to	explore	her	sensuality	and	her	limits	safely,	with	due	respect	and	regard	for	her	needs,	her	limits	and	her	wellbeing.	If	you	care	so	much	about	her	needs	and
limits,	maybe	you	should’ve	consulted	her	at	some	point	in	the	process	of	writing	this	monstrosity?		Handing	someone	a	fully-written	contract	and	going	“of	course	you	have	a	choice!	you	can	sign,	or	not	sign!”	isn’t	exactly	negotiation.	3	The	Dominant	and	the	Submissive	agree	and	acknowledge	that	all	that	occurs	under	the	terms	of	this	contract	will
be	consensual,	confidential,	and	subject	to	the	agreed	limits	and	safety	procedures	set	out	in	this	contract.	“Consensual”	isn’t	a	magic	word.		You	can’t	just	declare	something	consensual.		The	other	person	would	have	to	actually	consent	to	it.	5	Adherence	to	the	above	warranties,	agreements	and	undertakings	(and	any	additional	limits	and	safety
procedures	agreed	under	clause	3	above)	are	fundamental	to	this	contract.	Any	breach	shall	render	it	void	with	immediate	effect	and	each	party	agrees	to	be	fully	responsible	to	the	other	for	the	consequence	of	any	breach.	You’d	think	someone	who	was	so	into	playing	lawyer	wouldn’t	write	a	clause	this	garbled.		“The	consequence	of	any	breach”	is
that	the	contract	is	void;	i.e.,	Ana	doesn’t	have	to	follow	orders,	and	Buff	ChunderStorm	doesn’t	have	to…	well,	he	doesn’t	really	have	to	do	anything	under	the	contract	anyway,	so	he’s	free	to	continue	not	doing	anything	for	her.		That’s	all.	There’s	nothing	else	to	be	responsible	for.	I	think	the	idea	here	is	that	Clam	ThudBlast	could	make	shit	up	and
say	“I	decided	you	have	to	get	one	thousand	lashes	and	give	me	twelve	blowjobs	as	the	consequence	of	your	breach,”	but	the	contract	as	written	does	not	allow	for	that.	8	If	at	any	time	the	Dominant	should	fail	to	keep	to	the	agreed	terms,	limitations	and	safety	procedures	set	out	in	this	contract	or	agreed	additionally	under	clause	3	above	the
Submissive	is	entitled	to	terminate	this	contract	forthwith	and	to	leave	the	service	of	the	Dominant	without	notice.	Or,	you	know,	any	time	she	goddamn	feels	like	it.	
13	The	Dominant	reserves	the	right	to	dismiss	the	Submissive	from	his	service	at	any	time	and	for	any	reason.	The	Submissive	may	request	her	release	at	any	time,	such	request	to	be	granted	at	the	discretion	of	the	Dominant	subject	only	to	the	Submissive’s	rights	under	clauses	2-5	and	8	above.	OH	BABY	CROSS-REFERENCE	ME	HARDER.	The
second	sentence	is	not	just	wildly	illegal	and	immoral,	but	inconsistent	with	the	contract	itself.		If	she	breaches	the	contract,	it’s	void;	therefore,	if	she	breaches	by	leaving	the	relationship,	her	penalty	is…	not	being	in	the	relationship.		Obviously	this	is	a	good	thing,	but	it’s	fucking	unsettling	that	it’s	a	loophole	in	a	“you	can’t	leave”	clause	instead	of
directly	granted	in	a	“you’re	free	to	leave”	clause.	15	The	following	service	provisions	have	been	discussed	and	agreed	and	will	be	ad-hered	to	by	both	parties	during	the	Term.	
Both	parties	accept	that	certain	matters	may	arise	which	are	not	covered	by	the	terms	of	this	contract	or	the	service	provisions,	or	that	certain	matters	may	be	renegotiated.	In	such	circumstance	further	clauses	may	be	proposed	by	way	of	amendment.	Any	further	clauses	or	amendments	must	be	agreed,	documented	and	signed	by	both	parties	and
shall	be	subject	to	the	fundamental	terms	set	out	at	clauses	2-5	above.	This	chapter	makes	me	feel	like	scrolling	to	the	bottom	and	clicking	“okay”	so	I	can	just	get	my	goddamn	iTunes	update	already.	15.22	The	Submissive	shall	not	look	directly	into	the	eyes	of	the	Dominant	except	when	specifically	instructed	to	do	so.	The	Submissive	shall	keep	her
eyes	cast	down	and	maintain	a	quiet	and	respectful	bearing	in	the	presence	of	the	Dominant.	This	is	just	one	of	many	clauses	detailing	how	she’s	supposed	to	take	beatings	without	complaint,	obey	orders	without	question,	etc.,	but	for	some	reason	this	is	the	one	that	pushed	me	over	the	“oh,	FUCK	YOU”	line.	The	weird	thing	is,	I’ve	done	eye	contact
restrictions	in	real	life	and	it’s	been	hot.		(Albeit	for	the	length	of	a	scene.	If	I	had	to	go	around	Rowdy’s	house	all	the	time	with	my	eyes	demurely	downcast	I’d	probably	bump	into	things	a	lot,	and	“hey	honey,	do	you	need	anything	from	Home	Depot?”-type	conversations	would	become	really	weird.)		But	seeing	it	here	makes	me	want	to	death-glare
straight	in	Dash	BugZap’s	eyes	while	yelling	“nyahh!	you	can’t	stop	me!		nyahh!”	The	Dominant	shall	provide	the	Submissive	with	a	personal	trainer	four	times	a	week	in	hour-long	sessions	at	times	to	be	mutually	agreed	between	the	personal	trainer	and	the	Submissive.	
	Having	her	check	off	“ankles	are	okay,	no	knees	please,	elbows	are	okay…”	is	not	going	to	give	you	the	necessary	insight	into	her	body	mechanics	and	preferences.	What	is	the	Submissive’s	general	attitude	about	receiving	pain?	Where	1	is	likes	intensely	and	5	is	dislikes	intensely:	1	–	2	–	3	–	4	–	5	How	much	pain	does	the	submissive	want	to	receive?
Where	1	is	none	and	5	is	severe:	1	–	2	–	3	–	4	–	5	So…	if	she	circles	5	and	then	1,	does	that	actually	change	anything?	My	head	is	buzzing.	How	can	I	possibly	agree	to	all	this?	Well,	you	don’t	have	to	if	you	don’t	want	to.		That’s	actually	the	whole	point	of	this.	I	shudder	at	the	thought	of	being	flogged	or	whipped.	
Spanking	probably	wouldn’t	be	so	bad,	humiliating	though.	And	tied	up?	Well	he	did	tie	my	hands	together.	That	was…	well	it	was	hot,	really	hot,	so	perhaps	that	won’t	be	so	bad.	Flogging,	whipping,	and	spanking	are	all	things	I	do.		And	I	do	them	because	I	want	to.		Because	I’ve	dreamed	about	them	since	before	I	even	dreamed	about	sex.		Because
when	I	do	them,	I’m	flying,	and	when	I	don’t	do	them,	I	crave	them.		If	my	feelings	about	them	were	“they	don’t	sound	so	bad,	I	think	I	can	cope	if	I	have	to,”	I	wouldn’t	fucking	do	them.	I	can’t	look	him	in	the	eye.	How	weird	is	that?	
The	only	way	I	ever	have	any	chance	to	see	what	he’s	thinking.	Actually,	whom	am	I	kidding,	I	never	know	what	he’s	thinking,	but	I	like	looking	into	his	eyes.	He	has	beautiful	eyes	–	captivating,	intelligent,	deep	and	dark,	dark	with	dominant	secrets.	I	recall	his	burning	smoky	gaze	and	press	my	thighs	together,	squirming.	
And	I	can’t	touch	him.	Well,	no	surprise	there.	And	these	silly	rules…	No,	no	I	can’t	do	this.	I	put	my	head	in	my	hands.	This	is	no	way	to	have	a	relationship.	It’s	okay	to	think	that,	Ana!		It	sounds	like	this	is	wrong	for	you!		Which	is	fine!		You	don’t	have	to	if	you	don’t	want	to!	My	subconscious	sounds	sane	and	rational,	not	her	usual	snarky	self.	My
inner	goddess	is	jumping	up	and	down,	clapping	her	hands	like	a	five-year-old.	Please,	let’s	do	this…	otherwise	we’ll	end	up	alone	with	lots	of	cats	and	your	classic	novels	to	keep	you	company.	So	that’s	why	she	agrees	to	this.		Because	she	thinks	her	only	choices	in	life	are	to	be	owned	and	beaten	or	to	be	alone	forever.	
	God	that’s	sad.		Nothing	about	this	is	fucking	okay.	You	know,	cats	and	classic	novels	can	be	very	pleasant.	Sounds	downright	cozy	to	me.	Maybe	if	I	just	sign	up	for	the	sex…	would	he	go	with	that?	I	suspect	not.	This	is	so	incredibly	not	the	voice	of	someone	who	is	enthusiastically	consenting	to	BDSM.	Does	E.L.	James	think	all	submissives	and
bottoms	are	like	this?		That	we	just	put	up	with	the	domination	and	pain	so	we	can	be	in	a	relationship	at	all?	This	is	getting	unbearably	sad.	“There’s	a	man	here	with	a	delivery	for	you.	You	have	to	sign	for	it.”	[…]	“It’s	a	MacBook	Pro.”	“Of	course	it	is.”	I	roll	my	eyes	.	“These	aren’t	available	in	the	shops	yet,	ma’am,	the	very	latest	from	Apple.”	Growl
PreenCock	somehow	manages	to	be	creepy	and	controlling	even	when	he’s	giving	presents.	
	The	message	isn’t	“you	should	have	nice	things!”,	it’s	“I	have	money	and	power	and	you	are	indebted	to	me!”	“Well,	this	has	full	wireless	N,	and	I’ve	set	it	up	with	your	Me	account	details.	This	baby	is	all	ready	to	go,	practically	anywhere	on	the	planet.”	He	looks	longingly	at	it.	Ooh,	wireless	N!		I	love	that	stuff.	(Is	she	trying	to	say	802.11n?	That’s
the	closest	I’ve	got	to	that	making	sense.)	And	practically	anywhere	on	the	planet!		That’s	really	nice.		I	can	only	take	my	laptop	some	places.		It	disintegrates	in	Australia	and	most	EU	countries.	“Me	account?”	“Your	new	email	address.	”	I	have	an	email	address?	He	points	to	an	icon	on	the	screen	and	continues	to	talk	at	me	but	it’s	like	white	noise.	I
haven’t	got	a	clue	what	he’s	saying,	and	in	all	honestly,	I’m	not	interested.	Just	tell	me	how	to	switch	it	on	and	off	–	I’ll	figure	out	the	rest.	Most	of	Ana’s	dialogue	makes	her	sound	younger	than	her	age,	so	it’s	jarring	to	have	her	suddenly	acting	like	my	86-year-old	grandmother	asking	how	to	rewind	a	DVD.	[after	some	emails	between	Dog	ThrashBait
and	Ana	that	are	too	painfully	inane	to	relate,	except	that	she	says	she	didn’t	want	the	computer	and	he	of	course	completely	fucking	disregards	that]	He	emailed	me.	I’m	like	a	small,	giddy	child.	And	all	the	contract	angst	fades.	As	I	wash	my	hair,	I	try	and	think	what	I	could	possibly	ask	him	via	email.	Surely	it’s	better	to	talk	these	things	through.
Suppose	someone	hacked	into	his	account?	I	flush	at	the	thought.	She’s	in	the	bathroom	at	this	point,	so	I’m	not	sure	what	kind	of	“flush”	she	means.	(I	did	a	search,	and	this	book	uses	the	word	“flush”	exactly	100	times.	I	haven’t	checked	on	“blush”	and	“turn	red”	and	so	forth,	but	basically	it	would	be	more	efficient	if	Ana	told	us	all	the	times
she	wasn’t	going	tomato-faced.)	I	don’t	know	if	all	this	weirdness	around	email	is	unintentionally	revealing	E.L.	James’s	attitude	toward	technology,	or	if	it’s	yet	another	thing	for	Ana	to	be	naive	and	helpless	about.	José	is	punctual.	He	comes	bounding	into	the	shop	like	a	gamboling	dark-eyed	puppy.	
“Ana,”	he	smiles	his	dazzling	toothy	all-Hispanic-American	smile,	and	I	can’t	be	angry	with	him	anymore.	*cringes*	(I	can’t	believe	it	took	me	this	long	to	figure	out	that	Jose	is	Jacob.		The	“puppy”	line	gave	it	away.)	[Big	McLargeHuge	to	Ana]:	I	do	hope	you	had	a	good	day	at	work.	[I’m	sparing	you	the	way	the	emails	are	written	out	in	the	book,	which
includes	the	date	and	time	stamps,	subject	lines,		salutations,	and	Christian	Grey’s	fucking	email	signature.	Every	time.		And	there’s	like	twenty	emails	in	this	chapter.]		[Ana	to	McLargeHuge]:	Sir…	I	had	a	very	good	day	at	work.	Thank	you.		[McLargeHuge	to	Ana]:	Delighted	you	had	a	good	day.	
While	you	are	emailing,	you	are	not	researching.	God	what	a	dick.		It’s	like,	he’s	an	abuser,	but	on	another	level,	he’s	also	just	a	dick.	I	type	Submissive	into	Wikipedia.	Half	an	hour	later,	I	feel	slight	queasy	and	frankly	shocked	to	my	core.	Do	I	really	want	this	stuff	in	my	head?	Jeez	–	is	this	what	he	gets	up	to	in	the	Red	Room	of	Pain?	If	you	actually
type	“Submissive”	into	Wikipedia,	it	redirects	to	“Deference”,	which	mostly	discusses	the	term	in	sociological	contexts.		But	at	the	end	it	does	mention	BDSM:	“In	interpersonal	relationships,	some	people	prefer	or	are	willing	to	adopt	a	submissive	role	in	sexual	activities	or	personal	matters.	
The	level	and	type	of	submission	can	vary	from	person	to	person,	and	from	one	context	to	another;	and	also	is	dependent	on	the	other	partner	being	willing	to	assume	control	in	those	situations.	Some	people	can	include	occasional	acts	of	submission	in	an	otherwise	conventional	sex	life,	or	adopt	a	submissive	lifestyle.”	I	don’t	know	about	you,	but	I’m
shocked	to	my	core.	Feel	free	to	comment	and	vist	facebook	group:	letstalkrelationships	50	shades	of	grey	contract	free	download	submission	contract	pdf	50	shades	of	grey	contract	pdf	free	download	christian	grey	contract	50	shades	of	grey	contract	legal	fifty	shades	of	grey	contract	appendix	4	fifty	shades	of	grey	contract	rules	fifty	shades	of	grey
contract	download	50	shades	of	gray	contract	pdf	50	shades	of	gray	contract	50	shades	of	grey	contract	pdf	download	fifty	shades	of	grey	contract