Dr.

Pfish’s Fireplace Surprise

“Refreshing”— Emily Pevis — Snotsgate

Dr. Pfish’s Instant Headache

FISH • DE AT H S
& CIG A R ETTE “Refreshing”— Emily Pevis — Snotsgate

NO 317. SWILL TOURIST BUREAU: EEL DAY [PRICE, ONE HALFPFENNIG]

I N THE DEEP, UMBRAL

DARKNESS OF THE PIT, THE
FIRES OF INDUSTRY BURN.
Turnip28: Swill v04a
The following is a living document
Work-Life Balance
In the stifling heat and oppressive gloom
containing all the rules you need to fight of the public toilets, Phle’gm assembled
The foul subterraneous city of Swill skirmish battles set the city of Swill and his urinal cakes. The Workhouse had
sits on an ocean of oil, its smog-choked in the world of Turnip28. branded the cakes ‘New and Improved,’
slums, soaked black by belching What is Swill? of which Phle’gm was dubious. Stamped
smokestacks, weave a suffocating A Victorian adventure in a city obsessed with the face of a grinning halibut and
labyrinth of rowhouse horror for twenty with fish, death, and cigarettes. boasting ten percent more swill—that
thousand wretches. foul oily substance from which the
Turnip28: Swill is the skirmish expansion city took its name.
Terrified whispers spread through to the Turnip28 miniatures wargame. The
narrow streets. Foul creatures stalk city of Swill is a brand new setting with
the slums. Shadowy figures flock to the incredible narrative-focused rules using
ranks of the workhouse monasteries, only a handful of miniatures.
their presence, a dark omen of things to
come. Factory cult citadels, the masters Tinned Veg: Players of Turnip28 can also
of Swill, dormant for centuries, have use their Regiment in Swill, taking their
awakened, and have begun to flood the Toff and a small collection of idiots on
city with their bloodthirsty followers. tour to the city under the earth.
A new age of unimaginable chaos and While the rules to play games of
industrial revolution has begun. Turnip28: Swill are contained herein,
Workhouses, heaving with pitiful if you are keen to know more about
labourers, fishwives, and flensers— the world of Turnip28, seek
poisoned in mind and body, fight out the Core Rules and the
merciless street fights in the pitch black accompanying Swollen Maglette.
alleys as they wrestle for control. Broken, Each packed with worldbuilding
wracked, and twisted by mutation— fiction, community modelling
they gut each other like pilchards in guides, and fantastic art
a desperate attempt to appease their immersing you in the
factory cult overlords, and sell more fish. root veg apocalypse.
Print-friendly versions of
Swill screams with the cries of invention. all of these documents are
Psychokinetic tinned meats made available free at:
from the body parts of antediluvian www.patreon.com/Turnip28
aristocracy rattle in their iron
prisons, fueled by oil, metal, and hate.
Shuddering scab tanks grind down
ginnels overflowing with tar, sScab
steamers scuttle themselves on the oil
slick foreshore and shoals of sprats,
in unprecedented numbers, swarm in
the shadows.
Dark clouds gather over Cist. Dying
travellers fatally wheeze sorry memories
of the abyss. Croaking klaxon crows call
out to the most foolhardy Regiments.
Gather your troops, fix bayonets, and
descend to the pit city of Swill.

1
Phle’gm always seemed to have the worst Descend into Darkness Tokens: Players will need a selection of
of it. For as long as he could remember, Swill Miniatures: In Swill, players distinguishable tokens to play a game of
which was about half the time it took to command a pathetically small Swill:
really clean the swill out of your ears, Workhouse of about 5-10 miniatures, • Panic Tokens: The Workhouse you’ll be
he’d been cursed with bad luck. each represented by a single 28mm working for is full of terrified mutants,
Absentmindedly, Phle’gm picked a cake model with their own hopes, dreams, and to represent their mounting panic
and crippling company debt. They can during a skirmish, players will need a set
off the conveyor and gave it a chew.
be built from official Swill 3D prints or of small tokens, one for each member of
He had to admit, despite the recent their Workhouse. Players could use oily
reduction in icing, they really did taste whatever historical and fantasy kits the
black glass beads, small pebbles stolen
like urinals. player can dredge up.
from the beach, or any other suitably
Link to shop goes here: small but noticeable game pieces.
Without warning, a tremendous gurgling
of the pipes shook the loos. Jets of boiling Phle’gm dragged the gangly newcomer • Powder Smoke Tokens: Black powder
steam sent Phle’gm sprawling, smacking around the Swill Tourist Bureau gibbets, weapons produce noxious plumes of
his nose on a nearby sink. Torrents of smoke when fired. To represent this, a
featuring an incredible cast of characters
foul liquid sprayed into his eyes, forcing player may need some powder smoke
rotting in their cages. tokens. Players could use bits of cotton
his head between the hot and cold tap.
The toe wriggled from beneath Phle’gms wool, stuffing, or white glass beads.
And suddenly it was over. coat and helped itself to a selection of • Order Tokens: Sometimes a hard-fought
Wiping away the filth, Phle’gm recovered amusing postcards. battle can get particularly muddled.
and gazed upon the cause of the Players may wish to have a set of tokens
If Turnip28 is the depressing sitcom of for each of their models to show which
commotion, lying unashamedly in the wargaming, Swill is the badly written have activated in a round. It is not
bowl. It was a toe. sketch show. The rules encourage players essential to play with order tokens, but
“Flipping heck.” to make their Workhouse truly unique. they are useful to have on hand.
With only about 5-10 models to build
Opening his work coat and rummaging • Wounds: Players will need something
and paint, this is an excuse to explore the
for a place among the severed hands, to represent ghastly wounds their
strangest corners of the Turnip world. characters suffer over the course of a
odd cigarettes, smoked fish, and rudely
game. 1 blood red D6 per miniature
shaped artillery shells, Phle’gm found The Slums of Swill
works best.
a spot and fastened the toe among his To be born in Swill is to know that you
forest of charms. are nothing, doomed to grease the geared Objective Markers: Some scenarios
wheels of damnation. To be one among may ask players to place up to 5
The voice of the Berk upstairs yapped objective markers. These represent the
from a distant gantry. thousands in a bizarre and hateful world
of perpetual night. unbelievably awful jobs that the Factory
“Phle’gm. We’ve got weirdo from the Cult insists your Workhouse takes
surface coming tonight. He’s apparently Every game of Swill will take your care of.
quite the nob, and it’s your job to show Workhouse to a different part of the
city, from the offal-filled fish markets to These could be gutters that need cleaning,
him round.” chimneys that need sweeping or piles of
the noxious lantern heights of Moffton.
“Maybe my luck is finally changing,” Each part of the city and each game the dead that need shovelling.
thought Phle’gm. is represented by a 24” x 24”square Objective markers are represented by
Buried within the depths of the coat, the playing surface covered in a patchwork 32mm-diameter circular bases. Players
toe wiggled. of crumbling rowhouses and gutted fish, are encouraged to decorate objective
sitting on a lake of corrupted oil. markers with something thematic.
Dice: The game is played with six-sided Construction signs, fishmongers’
dice, abbreviated in these rules as D6. chalkboards and tattered advertising
Players will need a good two handfuls of posters are a favourite, with players
D6s, about 20 should do. switching them out with their opponent
when they are captured and lost.
Made to Measure: Like Turnip28, Swill
uses inches to measure distance, so it is
recommended that players bring a tape
measure with an inch scale.
The game can be played using
centimetres instead of inches, by
substituting 1” for 2.5cm.

2
Print and Play: Basing:

X+ Characteristics:

www.patreon.com/Turnip28
Th
G fiThffffifft PffflfiftflfftTh
Models: Improbable Rolls:

Basing in Turnip28:

Characters:

Modiers:

Character Proles: Base-to-Base contact:

Characteristics:

Rolling Dice:

T’urbot Base Size:

M A I W V
Re-Rolls:

Movement (M):

Attacks (A):

Inaccuracy (I):

Roll Os:
Friends and Enemies:
Wounds (W):

uV lnerability (V):

3
Targeting: The city’s streets swim in Measuring: Swill allows players to Playing the Game
lung-rotting smog, barely illuminated measure at any time, in any situation. It Scenarios: Every game of Swill is some
by viridescent lamp light. To simulate is always acceptable for a player to check truly horrible job undertaken by your
fighting in these dreadful conditions, if their models are in or out of range Workhouse, and is played using one of
players MUST always target the closest without penalty. the many scenarios.These can be found
enemy model within line of sight. starting on page XX.
When measuring the distance between
Unless specifically stated, anytime a rule two models, it is always between the two Each Scenario will provide players with
asks the player to pick a target, they must closest points of their bases. the table size, terrain layout, victory
always choose the closest enemy model conditions, and deployment rules
Range: Sometimes a rule will refer to
within line of sight (see page xx). required to play.
a model’s range, such as a character’s
If there are multiple models an equal command range or weapon’s range. A It is recommended that players play
distance away, the active player may model’s range is the maximum distance their first few games of Swill using the
choose which to target. Players may it may target another model, given in Scenario: In the Gutter (page xx). Its
never divide their shooting attacks inches. straightforward rules will help players
between multiple targets, nor may they get to grips with their Workhouses with
Within: To be within range, it is enough
attempt to charge multiple targets at the minimal distractions, and hopefully clean
for any part of a model’s base to be
same time. the place up a bit.
partially inside that distance.
If the closest enemy model is not within Workhouses: In Swill, each player takes
To be within an area, it is enough for
line of sight, then the player must choose control of a desperately impoverished
any part of a model’s base to be partially
the next closest model in line of sight. Workhouse, made up of a selection of
inside that area.
Targeting Knocked Down Models: long-suffering characters broken down
Wholly Within: For a model to be into Snobs and Followers.
A knocked down model can never be
wholly within range, a model’s entire base
targeted so long as there is another Snobs:
must not be any further away than the
standing enemy model within range and • First, every Workhouse must have
maximum range.
line of sight. its leader, known as the Berk. This
For a model to be wholly within an charismatic murderer in a top hat leads
Line of Sight: Line of Sight (LOS) is an the Workhouse in their obsession to sell
area, its entire base must be inside the
imaginary line drawn from the eyes of a more fish.
area described.
model to its target. If a model could see
any part of another, then that model is in These rules apply every time “wholly A Workhouse may only ever have
one Berk.
LOS, if the target model is hidden, it is within” or “within” are mentioned in
not in LOS. the rules, whether it mentions models, • Secondly, is the spectacularly violent
objectives, or other game pieces. Rotter. The Workhouse floor boss and
Swill uses ‘true line of sight’, where a as dense as bricks. There are hundreds
player is encouraged to get down to table “You here on holiday then?” asked of Rotters in Swill: fishmongers,
level and see the game from their model’s Phle’gm, pulling the bones out of ironmongers, filthmongers and
point of view. If a figure is modelled in his chocolate. cheesemongers to name but a few. All
a way that would make this difficult, or masters of their craft, and not much else.
“Something like that,” coughed the
if you prefer a more competitive game, A Workhouse starts with 1 Rotter.
stranger.
draw a line from an imaginary point 1”
above the centre of the figure’s base to Turnip28: Swill players should always
its target. strive to be the best players they can be.
While that means mastering the rules
360° View: Models in Swill have a
and creating outstanding models, it also
360-degree field of view at all times,
means playing with integrity and respect.
and so can potentially target any model
around them. While it is not required, Put the enjoyment of your opponent first
players are always encouraged to face at all times, no matter how much you
models in the direction they are shooting might covet their cans of tinned fish.
or charging, during their movement.
Some of the most cool art goes here

4
Followers: Factory Cults: Once a Workhouse has Players may wish to embellish their
Wretches: been assembled, players may choose one table with visual elements, such market
Next, most Workhouses can barely scrape of the many squabbling Factory Cults to stalls, curious swill inhabitants, or other
together enough to feed themselves, and must swear fealty to. Factory Cults provide a suitable scenic pieces. These visual
rely on the street smarts of a host of miserable
thematic and exciting way to play Swill, elements should not have any effect
mutants to survive. These are the Wretches
of Swill. Unenviable figures, enthusiastic and
adding unique characters, equipment and on gameplay and should be clearly
barbarically cruel so long as they can have a strategies. Due to the added complexity distinguished before play begins.
smoke break. of Factory Cults, it is recommended that
Deployment: After the board has
players play a few games using only their
• For every Berk in your Workhouse, you been set up, players will deploy their
starting Workhouse before adding them
can afford to hire any TWO Wretches. Workhouses on the board. Depending
to their games. A full list of Factory Cults
• For each Rotter in your Workhouse, you
on the Scenario, players will have a set
can be found on page XX.
can afford to hire ONE Wretch. of deployment rules to follow, telling
If you’ve taken a few nervous looks at the them how and where they may place
Twerps: Factory Cults and scenarios at the back their models. If the Scenario says it has
Finally, and unfortunately is the Twerp, of this book, it may bring on feelings of Standard deployment, it will follow the
a snivelling brat sent down from the abject misery and confusion. steps below.
Factory Cult. Fantastically overconfident,
unqualified and a danger to anyone Don’t Panic! We’ve been through Starting with the player with the
around them. this before. Initiative, players take turns deploying
a single character in their deployment
• There’s always a Twerp. Swill has been designed to be played in a
zone, until all characters are deployed on
modular fashion.
• A Workhouse MUST have 1 Twerp. the table.
Players are more than encouraged to • The Deployment Zone is an area of
Once a player has emptied their pockets,
take only what they want from the the board specifically designated by
pawned the family gurnard, and hired
system, playing at a level of complexity the Scenario. Some rules may allow a
their last Wretch, their starting Swill
they enjoy. If you prefer to play without player to deploy models outside their
Workhouse is complete.
Factory Cults or scenarios, go for it! deployment zone, independent of a
Comprehensive instructions for If a rule doesn’t quite capture your Scenario’s rules.
equipping your Workhouse characters, imagination, and your group agrees, feel • A model deployed on an objective or tin
along with all character profiles, can be free to modify or remove it entirely. is considered to have captured it.
found starting on page (xx).
Try inventing your own Factory Cult to Once all characters that can be
Offal Clogs Street as The Moffton represent your Swill collection. It’s a lot deployed have been deployed, the battle
Ripper, Local Serial Killer and Quantity of fun. can commence.
Surveyor, Strikes Again.
Cool art goes here A Scab Steamer burst from beneath a
“Typical,” Moaned Phle’gm, shoving warehouse, the remains of mangled
Rounds: Swill is played in rounds. A
the latest edition of the Bilge, bodies flopping from its funnels.
typical game lasts 4 rounds. In a round
Swill’s Illustrated News, under the Phle’gm, the Stranger, and the Toe
of Swill, players take turns ordering their
aristocrat’s nose. huddled under brollies from the shower
characters until every model on the
A player’s starting Workhouse battlefield has each received 1 order. of gore and floorboards.
will contain: “Nice weather for sprats,” muttered
Initiative: At the very start of a game
1 x Berk of Swill, before all things, players must the Stranger.
roll-off to discover which player has the In Swill, being in the wrong place at
1 x Rotter
Initiative. The player with the Initiative the wrong time can lead to a quick and
2 x Wretches will get first pick when deploying their painful death. Players should aim to
models and gets to choose which model deploy their models carefully, using the
1 x Twerp
to activate first every round. terrain to their advantage, keeping their
It is recommended that players fight a few models safe in cover with their eyes on
The player who wins the Initiative keeps
skirmishes with their starting Workhouse the enemy.
it for the rest of the game.
to get comfortable with the core rules.
Set Up: Before placing any models, Cool art goes here
When the player feels ready, they can don
the table must be set up to the
their sprat kicking wellies and venture
Scenario’s specifications.
into the city streets and embark on their
Campaign of violence. Rules for running Terrain and any objectives are placed at
a Swill Campaign can be found starting this time, as well as any Factory Cult-
on page XX. specific terrain pieces.

5
OThfiffThffi ORDERS SEQUENCE Make Ready:
Starting with the player who has
the Initiative,

Command Range:

Berks: 6” Rotters 3”

Remember:

Starting with the player who fftnished

activating their Snobs fftrst,

Note:

6
OThfiffThffi Lfftffifl Blunders: Mftfffffl
Orders:

FIRE!

BLUNDER:

Scenario Blunders:
MOVE AND SHOOT!
1” rule:

Terrain:

Scenario
BLUNDER: Blunder

LEG IT!

Small Obstacles:
BLUNDER:

CHARGE!

Remember:
BLUNDER:

7
Climbin’: SHOOTING
Dangerous Terrain: ENGAGEMENT SEQUENCE
Starting with the player who
is shooting,

aH zard Tests:

uJ mpin’:

(M)

Remember:

SThfififfffifftfl
Fallin’:

Splat!:

Note on Casualties:

8
Weapon’s Range: SHOOTING ATTACK SEQUENCE Shooting At Models in Cover:
For a unit’s Shooting attacks,
Shooting At Models in the Open:

Remember:

Shooting Targets: uV lnerability Rolls:

Shooting at n
K ocked Down Models:
Wounds:

Return Fire:

Injuries:
Shooting Attacks: Remember:

Powder Tokens:

INJURY TABLE ThD6fi

2-6= n
K ocked Down:

Inaccuracy Rolls:

1 = Death:

Cover:

9
n
K ocked Down: CThfiffffifftflffi Leap of Faith:

CHARGING SEQUENCE
Stand and Shoot:
To charge a model,

n
K ocked Down Near a Ledge:

Blunder:

Ordering n
K ocked Down Models:

Removed from the Table:

Charge Targets:
Winners and Losers:

Charging n
K ock Down Models:
Charge Range:

Note:

Charge Distance:

10
Failed Charges: MELEE SEQUENCE MELEE ATTACK SEQUENCE
Starting with the player that charged, For a unit’s Melee attacks,

MThfiThTh

increase the Pffifftflft

Attacks of both models by +1
affer every bout.

Remember:

Melee Attacks:

Panic and aH zard Tests:

11
RThfiffThffififftflft Retreating and Terrain: Fundamentals:

Remember:

RETREAT SEQUENCE

To move a retreating model, Slums:

Retreat Distance: RThTh

 ff

Ruins:

Detritus:

Remember: TThffffffifftfl

Directly Away:

Moving Retreating Models:

12
PThfiffffifftflffift Sfftfi
 ft
 : Special Note:
Playtesting:

I Tfft Gffiffifft
Street ghting:

Objectives:

Capturing Objectives:

Objectives:

iV ctory Conditions:

Scenario Blunder:

13
Th
H fiThffffi Yfftflfi Wfftfiftfftfl ’G ous FOLLOWERS
Base Size:
’G ilm
M A I W V Base Size:
e full Swill Rules will contain a
plethora of creative ways to build your M A I W V
Workhouse but for this version, please Equipment:
test out these two starter Workhouses. Equipment:
All stat changes, including any from
equipment or skills (for example close W’eevley
combat weapons) have NOT been Base Size:
A’dde
adjusted on their prole. M A I W V Base Size:
Fffiffi’ Pfi M A I W V
Equipment:
CHARACTERS
Equipment:
Snobs Bullied:
Sl’ardinnius Fegg
Base Size: T’uppfreid
Command Range: W’imples Base Size:
M A I W V Base Size:
M A I W V
M A I W V
Equipment: Equipment:
Equipment:
On Your feet!: Uncomfortably Stubborn:
Wellies:

Dfi PTh’  Iffff

  Butchered:

CHARACTERS
Snobs EflThff
’G ull Reikspitte
Base Size:
Bottlecap Spectacles: Command Range: Revolver Weapons
M A I W V

Equipment:
Weapon’s Range:
B’lenn Roth
Clamberjack: Shots:
Base Size:
Command Range:
M A I W V
Longshanks: Close Combat Weapons
Enormous:

F’lattie Blotts
Base Size:
Command Range:
M A I W V
FOLLOWERS

L’imp Equipment:
Base Size:
M A I W V Butcher:

Equipment:

14
Designer Notes
Thank you so much for giving the
swill public playtest a go, there’s
much to improve on. If you have any
thoughts and feedback, please send it
to Turnip28vegbox@gmail.com.
At the moment the retreat mechanic is
clashing with the knockdown mechanic.
These need unifying so they enhance the
gameplay rather than clog it up.
These two elements aim to create a sub
game, within the combat simulation.
Think of turnip’s snooker-like retreat
mechanic inside its combat sim.
Is there another interesting subgame
that could fit here that involves moving
models about and having them fall
off ledges.

15