“AM I TO BE BLAMED?

They’re chasing me, they’re chasing,

no they must not catch me,

I have enough money now,

Yes! enough for my starving mother and brothers.

Please let me go, let me go home before you imprisoned me.

Very well, officers? take me to your headquarters.

Good morning captain! no captain, you are mistaken, I was once a good girl, just like the rest of you
here. Just like any of your daughters.

But time was, when I was reared in slums. But we lived honestly, we lived honestly in life.

My, father, mother, brothers, sisters and I. But then, poverty enters the portals of our home.

My father became jobless, my mother got ill. The small savings that my mother had kept for our
expenses were spent. All for our daily needs and her needed medicine.

One night, my father went out, telling us that he would come back in a few minutes with plenty of
foods and money, but that was the last time I saw him. He went with another woman.

If only I could lay my hands on his neck I would wring it without pain until he breaths no more. If you
were in my place, you’ll do it, won’t you Captain?

What?

you won’t still believe in me?

Come and I’ll show you a dilapidated shanty by a railroad.

Mother, mother I’m home, mother?

mother?!.

There Captain, see my dead mother.

Captain? there are tears in your eyes? now pack this stolen money and return it to the owner. What
good would this do to my mother now? she’s already gone! Do you hear me? she’s already gone. Am
I to be blamed for the things I have done?
It Was Time

I had to tell him, man. I had to. I needed to. It was time.
It was time for me to be honest about how I feel. That's why I did that. That's why I wrote that poem.
That's why I gave it to him.
I can't take what I'm feeling for much longer. I simply had to tell him. I told him I loved him and didn't
wait for him to say anything else because I knew what he was going to say. I knew that he would say
no. I knew that he wasn't interested. He isn't interested. And he will never be interested.
I told him this:
"I've loved you for so long.
I don't know what else to say.
I feel that it is wrong
if I start with, 'Hey.'
Now, you know that you're the guy I was always referring to
and I'm sorry because I love you."
It was too much for me to handle. I simply had to declare it. Yes, I know I don't have the charms. I
also know I don't have the body. But my love for him can last for eternity.
I love him. It was time for me to say it. It was time.
Yes, I understand that he's attracted to girls I don't have a chance with and that, my friend, is a painful
thing to accept but I've learned to deal with it. I've learned not to mess with the other foot. I know my
boundaries.
I know it.
I just know it.
But it was time for me to let out that girl who has been in love with him since the day I met him. I had
to tell him that I needed him in my arms, that I needed to hear "I'm in love with you" rather than "I love
you."
My life isn't perfect. The sea is prettier than me. The rainbow is more colorful than my heart. The sun
is brighter than my eyes but that is me and that will always be me.
I never meant for things to get all awkward with us. I never meant for that to happen. But it wasn't my
fault that I fell in love with him. I fell in love with the only classmate who actually remembers me, who
actually cares for me, who actually considers me as his friend.
However, it was time.
I confessed. I was honest. I stopped lying for the sake of honesty and for the sake of our friendship.
He was too good for me.
My friend, I love him so much. It's too bad he'll never love me. He'll never want me. He'll never care
and he never will.
I am just the girl with the boring looks. I am short. But I am doing well in school. I am a stick-to-one
person. So why can't he be attracted to me? Simple: because I am not good enough.
I am not that white. I am not that tall. I am not that skinny and I am not that clean. My family is
pressuring me. I have anger issues. I don't know how to control myself. At least, I learned how to hold
back my emotions when I'm around him.
At least, my intentions are clear and clean. I only want what's best for him. And if I'm not good
enough, then I'M SORRY!
At least, I became really honest with him because that's what you wanted, right? For me to be honest
to him? Right? My friend... My friend...
Right... Right...
Oh, who am I kidding? No one will ever love me. And even if I tried finding someone who becomes
infatuated with me, I will not give him a try because that person isn't the guy I've fallen in love with.
That person isn't the classmate I tried taking pictures of when he's not looking. That person isn't the
guy of my dreams.
But... yes... my friend... it was time for me to tell him. It was time.
I KILLED HIM BECAUSE I LOVED HIM

Honorable judge, gentlemen of the jury, people of the Philippines judge me, am I guilty or not guilty?

But before you sentence me to death let me tell you my story.

There was a young girl, seventeen years of age with curvaceous body 36, 24, 26, a long hair and
sizzling eyes being rich as she was she studied at an exclusive school.

Then one night he returned home, he asked for money but I can’t give him for I just gave him last
night, so he walked out the door and the next day he returned home, he was cold as ever and hard as
a stone.

One day his graduation came I was so happy. I expected

Robbie to invite me but he never said a word. I didn’t mind it. I still attend his graduation ceremony
and when his name was called with a degree of medicine a suma cum laude Robi Santillan, I shouted
with glee! When i stood up I was shocked when another girl stood up, and gave that medal to him. I’m
supposed to give that medal and pin that ribbon, because I’m his wife, I’m his wife, right? I AM HIS
WIFE!

With that unpleasant thought fain when he returned home that night, I confronted him. “Robbie, who
was that girl?” I asked. He answered, “It’s none of your business” he said but Robbie I’m your wife,
“You’re just my wife” Robbie how could you do this to me? I gave up my studies and worked as a
sales lady and this? This is how you payback? “I have to leave”, he said and when he had packed his
this things I decided to get my 45 mm revolver.

“Robbie, you can’t just leave me” (pointing the gun to his face) “You can just leave me, Robbie.” “You
can’t just do this honey. be calm, be calm”…….”No, no, no you can’t just leave me, Robbie. You can’t
just do this”.

But he still decided to go and I did threw worst in my whole painstaking life “Mr. Robbie Santillian with
a degree of medicine a Suma cumlaude you will pay all my labors and sacrifices

“BANG! , BANG! I shot him Robbie…….I had killed him…….I had killed him with my bare hands…..
huhuhu… I’m so sorry.

And now honorable judge gentlemen of the jury people of the Philippines judge me am i guilty or not
guilty?
"ME AGAINST YOU"

I can't breathe in this white uniform. It's so tight. Release me.

Well, Thank yo for your kind words. I know, right. I already

expected this. I'm not surprised.

Oh! I haven't introduced myself to some of you. For those who don't know me, which only a few don't,
I'm Genuino Ontangco, a smart young man or I should say, a genius. Do you need someone to
answer your problems? I'm the perfect person to approach. You asked why? Because, I know
everything. Give me those equations, I'll simplify it. Give me those problems, I'll solve it. Give me that
piece, I'll correct it. Oh............ It feels good to be a genius

Sometimes I wondered, maybe if I was born a long time ago, then I would have created all the
inventions in this world. Maybe yes! Maybe.................yes! Why can't I? I know everything,
remember? Hahahahaha

My mother calls me Gene, my nickname. She has been my inspiration, or i mean assistant ever
since. How can she be my mentor? I know a lot more than her! My father, Oh! i don't know him. I
refuse to know him. Some people told me, he was a criminal, a thief, a man of pure evil, a product
which sent him to jail.

Some people told me, he has changed. I don't believe them. I tend to react when they connect him to
me. I can't stand it.

I hate those people who stand in my way, and does something without my approval. Only I, know
what's right.

"Mom!!!! Where's the documents in my table?" I asked.

"Oh! I thought that's a trash, I already threw it away." She answered

"I told you never to touch anything here, you stupid moron!"

"I'm still your mother young man! You can't say that to me"

"Why can't I? I know more than you coz you're a brainless idiot!

Yes! That's true!"

Then, she slapped me in the face. I punched her hard, and laughed as she dropped to the ground.
You should have seen her face while she fought for her life! She's dead!

Hahahaha. What a relief.

Oh! Here they are again! Stop! I can't breathe in this white uniform. It's so tight.

Release me! I should be free.

Release me!
Release me!
Release me!
Please... not HELL

Huh? Where am I? What is this place?

Fire? Fire? A Lake of Fire? Everywhere!
Ouch! Water… I need water, please.
I hate being here, this place is so hot, I’m hurting.
Oh no! no… worms!… Stay away from me.
You damn worms!
No! Don’t eat my flesh. Stop!

Where am I? Why I’m here! I…I- don’t belong here.. Get me out of here.
Don’t you know me? I’m Cass Alanan. A superstar, A world famous model and a President’s
daughter. I’m rich, beautiful and most of all powerful. What? Am I happy? You’re asking me if I’m
happy..? Of course, I am, I have all the riches in this world.

Riches… but not peace, not joy, not even love… But who needs that? I don’t need that… i’m rich I
can buy anything and everything I want.
My parents were always busy, they don’t love me.

My friends… well, they’re just a bunch of losers. They want me because they can use my money and
my fame. No joy, just a bunch of… Loosers and USERS!

And my boyfriend? huh! Another USER! I thought he is the only person in this world who can love me.
But, well, just last night that idiot went out with another girl. and Guess what? I saw them… making
out! You know what, he told me that he hates me and all he wants is my body and my money! USER!
Damn user!

They abandoned me. Left me with no love, no joy, no peace and no life.
On my way home, I met a Pastor – no, a crazy person in the park. He told me about Jesus… (Laugh)
“Jesus? Who is he? I don’t need him! I don’t care about him. He is just a fiction. You don’t understand
me, no one does and no one cares. Of course, you don’t. All you need is my money. Get out of my
sight!”

There’s no hell… You know what’s the real hell… my life!”

I walked out, left that Pastor and went home.

Alone and abandoned. Shuttered and Busted. Miserable and Broken.
I opened my cabinet, then I saw something… a beautiful escape, the most magical thing in this world
for hurt people like me. Then, I hear a whisper…

“One shot will finish your damn life”.

Yes right! I pinned it to my temple, then the next thing I know…

“Hell? I heard the Pastor saying about it. A place without Jesus.. Full of fire and flesh eating worms.
He said… “Jesus is the only way, the truth and the life” But I never listened.

This is hell, It’s true.

The Lake of Fire
A place for sinners.
A place of never ending punishment…
Oh no… No! No! No!
"The Plea of an Aborted Fetus"

LET THIS PRECIOUS ANGELS LIVE!

"SET ME FREE. LET ME LIVE, I DESERVE TO BE BORN, I WANT TO LIVE. FOR HEAVENS
SAKE, HAVE PITY."

Ladies and Gentlemen, dear fathers and mother, listen to my plea, listen to my story. I could have
been the 17th Lady President of the Philippines Republic, had you given me the chance to live, had
you not deprived me of my life, had you not taken away my privilege to be born.

Some eleven years ago, a healthy ovum started to generate in the womb of a woman with six other
children. My coming should be a herald of joy, a symbol of love incarnates but to my mommy it was a
burden, a problem, an additional mouth to feed. To Dad, it was a mistake, an effect of Mom's
carelessness for not taking the contraceptive pills.

One gloomy day in June, my unexpected coming was confirmed. It was a painful decision. I could
sense the imminent danger as Mom got inside the abortion room. I was an unwanted child. No one
loved me. No one cared. I was a rejected being, a tiny lump slowly forming into human being with
human soul. I was already alive, kicking, struggling. My heart was already beating and my thumb had
already the unique mark. As I was holding to my mother's womb a splash of heat came all over me. I
writhed in extreme pain.

-- "Mom, why have you done this to me? Am I not the flesh of your own flesh, the blood of your own
blood?"

The rubber suction caught my tiny limbs and mercilessly twisted it slowly cutting it from my body. I
struggled for my life. 1,2,3 and the first part of me came out.

-- "Mom, why have you permitted this? Am I not Dad's pledge of love to you?"

Then it was followed by another rubber suction sucking the other part moving it with force until both
were fully amputated.

-- "Mom, why have you done this to me? Am I not God's image you promised to love and protect?"

Then i felt shaken once, twice, several times until I do not know anymore what has been going
around. I gushed forth my last breath...

Then came the final blow, my head - the abortionist termed as No. I was totally cut from my torso:
total annihilation.

GONE IS MY CHANCE TO LEAD A HEALTHY NORMAL LIFE.

GONE IS MY CHANCE TO BEHOLD THE MANY LOVELY THINGS GOD CREATED FOR US.

GONE IS THE PROMISE OF A BLISSFUL LIFE.

“Conscience”

I wept, I cried so hard.

But these tears can’t bring back my sister to life.
My being brought here by my conscience.
I want to ask forgiveness. But can she still hear?
O heart, forgive me for what I have done, please bring peace to mind.

Dry leaves were crushed down below.

As if to freshen my memories that her life perished because of my selfishness.

She was my only sister. Since our childhood, I always believed that I was the favorite of our dad. One
night, while I was facing all about to the mirror, with my micro mini, I puffed powder, when I saw
Luisa’s face, reflecting in the mirror. "You can’t get out tonight, Lucille." I heard a threatening tone
from her. I turned to her, but I can’t resist at her sharp stare at me. "And who says so, my dear
sister?" "We are to celebrate Momma’s death anniversary, you know that, don’t you?" In a relaxed
and condescending voice, I replied "well I don’t care. I’m going out to party tonight!"

Then I heard a knock on the door. I shouted "Help Papa!" for I knew that it was he. I pulled my hair, I
tore my dress away as I was attacked by a squad of monstrous creatures. When the door opened the
site Papa saw was that Luisa was holding my neck who was trying to make a rescue. But I cried so
hard that made Papa grew to the height of anger. He threw Luisa to the corner, where the head of my
poor sister was hit at the edge of the chair.

I slowly rejoiced for I have made a successful revenge. But when she lifted, I saw a different sparkle
in her tearful eyes. "Ha ha ha ha ha!" O my, Luisa, she went out of her mind. I was not able to move,
as well as Papa. Both of us were motionless. And before we returned to our senses, Luisa ran to the
door and proceeded to the open gate of our house. We followed her calling out her name. "Luisa!"
"Sister!" "Luisa" "Sister" "Luisa the Truck!" "Don’t cross the road, Luisa, the truck don’t Don’t DON’T!"

The next sight I saw was that Luisa was thrown five meters away from the truck. I ran to her and
embraced her. Blood was all over her face. In a low but distinct voice she murmured, that made my
heart break so much. She said, "Lucille, please be a good girl. I love you. Please be a good girl ‘coz
Papa loves you very much."

"Luisa? Luisa?

Sister… sister!!!"

From that moment, I cried so hard for killing my only sister, who loved and cared for me, even at the
last moment of her life.

Now can you blame me, for asking God to forgive me?
Forgive me dear God, Forgive me!