UNIT II: Understanding Love
1. What is Love?
Definition:
Love is a multifaceted emotional and psychological experience involving feelings of
attachment, passion, care, and commitment. It plays a central role in human bonding,
intimacy, and relationship satisfaction.
Types of Love:
● Romantic love
● Companionate love
● Passionate love
● Platonic love
● Familial love
Love differs across cultures and individuals. In psychology, multiple theories attempt to
explain how love develops, is experienced, and is maintained.
2. Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love
Key Idea:
Love has three core components:
● Intimacy: Emotional closeness, bonding, warmth
● Passion: Physical attraction, sexual desire, excitement
● Commitment: Decision to maintain a long-term relationship
7 Types of Love According to Combinations:
1. Liking (Intimacy only)
2. Infatuation (Passion only)
3. Empty Love (Commitment only)
4. Romantic Love (Intimacy + Passion)
5. Fatuous Love (Passion + Commitment)
6. Companionate Love (Intimacy + Commitment)
7. Consummate Love (All three: ideal love)
Application:
● Helps analyze the nature and quality of romantic relationships
● Shows that relationships can shift between categories over time
3. Lee’s Colors of Love (Love Styles Theory)
Lee proposed 6 love styles that represent people’s unique approaches to love:
1. Eros (Passionate Love): Intense physical attraction, immediate connection
2. Ludus (Game-playing Love): Love as a playful, non-serious activity
3. Storge (Friendship-based Love): Slow-developing, based on companionship
4. Pragma (Practical Love): Logical and criteria-based (Storge + Ludus)
5. Mania (Obsessive Love): Possessive, emotionally dependent (Eros + Ludus)
6. Agape (Selfless Love): Altruistic, giving, sacrificial (Eros + Storge)
Utility:
● Explains individual and cultural variations in romantic preferences
● Used in love style questionnaires to assess romantic patterns
4. Two-Factor Theory of Love
Developed by Schachter & Singer
● Love is a combination of physiological arousal and cognitive interpretation.
● Arousal can be from any source (exercise, fear, excitement) and interpreted as
romantic if in a relational context.
Experiment Example:
● Bridge Study: Men misattributed fear-based arousal (from crossing a shaky bridge)
as romantic interest.
Conclusion:
● Physical arousal increases perceived romantic attraction.
5. Prototype Theory of Love
Concept:
● Love is not defined by a strict checklist but by prototypes or central features (trust,
caring, respect, emotional support).
● People recognize love when relationships share similarities with these core features.
Importance:
● Allows for flexibility in understanding diverse forms of love
● Validates cultural and personal variation in love definitions
6. Companionate vs Passionate Love
Passionate Love:
● Intense, emotional, and physical attraction
● Usually found at the beginning of romantic relationships
● High arousal and obsession
Companionate Love:
● Deep affection, comfort, emotional intimacy
● Found in long-term relationships and marriages
● More stable and enduring
Transition:
● Over time, passionate love may decline, while companionate love strengthens
7. Sexuality and Love
Sexuality as a Component of Love:
● Intersects with identity, physical connection, and emotional bonding
● Sexual behavior reflects personal, relational, and cultural values
Sexual Scripts:
● Societal norms guide sexual behavior
● Can vary by gender, orientation, and culture
Sexual Communication:
● Critical for consent, satisfaction, and maintaining intimacy
Development:
● Adolescents explore sexual identity and expression through relationships
● Love and sexual intimacy become more integrated with emotional maturity
8. Cultural Differences in Love and Sexuality
● Individualistic Cultures (e.g., USA): Emphasis on passionate love, self-expression,
autonomy
● Collectivist Cultures (e.g., India, Japan): Emphasis on familial duty, arranged
unions, and social harmony
Studies show:
● Passionate love is nearly universal but expressed and prioritized differently
9. Diagram Descriptions
Sternberg’s Triangle Diagram:
● Triangle labeled with each component at a corner (Intimacy, Passion, Commitment)
● Arrows show different love types based on combinations
Love Styles Chart:
● Matrix showing primary and secondary love styles (Eros → Mania, Storge → Agape)
Passionate vs Companionate Table:
Feature Passionate Love Companionate
Love
Emotion Intensity High Moderate
Stability Unstable/Short-term Stable/Long-term
Focus Physical arousal Emotional intimacy
Conclusion:
Love is a complex psychological phenomenon influenced by biological, emotional, cultural,
and social factors. Understanding different theories and styles of love provides a deeper
insight into how people form, maintain, and experience romantic relationships.
