Our Last Summer

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/31252523.

Rating: Explicit
Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: M/M
Fandom: EXO (Band)
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Park Chanyeol, Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Kim Jongin | Kai
Characters: Byun Baekhyun, Park Chanyeol, Do Kyungsoo | D.O, Kim Jongin | Kai,
Original Characters, Kang Seulgi
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, mention of infidelity, Not Between
Chanbaek!!, Falling In Love, Meant To Be, Painter Chanyeol, author
baekhyun, Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Slow Burn, Fluff, Mutual
Pining, Slice of Life, Love Confessions, Hurt/Comfort,
Misunderstandings, Chanyeol Speaks Italian, Long Haired Chanyeol,
Age Difference, mention of insomnia, Sexual Tension
Language: English
Collections: BAE2021
Stats: Published: 2021-05-12 Completed: 2021-07-04 Words: 69,753 Chapters:
2/2
 Our Last Summer
by baeconandeggs, mochicheekies

Summary

There was a spark on both sides, an intense sort of pull which disappeared when Jiwoo spoke
up again and reached out his hand. Neither Chanyeol nor Baekhyun were able to stop staring
at each other. It was as if they had so much to say but no time to do so, especially when the
smaller was supposed to reach his own hand out as well, feeling the other's way bigger one
wrap around his slender fingers.

" And you may be?"

" This is Byun Baekhyun, my fiancé. It is a pleasure to finally meet you, Mr. Park."

In which Baekhyun, a lost caged soul, finds Chanyeol, his salvation.

Notes

Prompt: BAE0318
Disclaimer: baeconandeggs/the mods is/are not the author/s of this story. Authors will be credited and tagged after
reveals. The celebrities' names/images are merely borrowed and do not represent who the celebrities are in real life. No
offense is intended towards them, their families or friends. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No
money is being made from this fictional work. No copyright infringement is intended.

Author's Notes: Hi everyone!

This is my first time participating in such a big fest and I am very very nervous.
Nevertheless, I worked on this story for almost five months and I hope it will be to some of
yours liking!! I mean, who can resist long haired Chanyeol and his tender voice?

I also want to thank my betas cinnamon roll and honey bun for sticking with me, helping me
when I felt stuck and never giving up on me and my writing! We made it this far and I'm
super proud of us hehe.

For the atmosphere, have this playlist. It is constructed to lead you through the story and
make you feel comforted! <3

[PLAYLIST]
Okay phew, have fun and thank you in advance, for giving this story a chance!
 Chapter 1

Our Last Summer

South Korea, Seoul

They say money can buy you happiness, either temporarily or for a lifetime. Actually, money
is supposed to do more than that. It should fill a void that used to be a deep cut within one's
heart, keep you going and be some sort of teasing spark that promises endless moments of
love.

It was ridiculous, now that he sat on the way too big couch in a way too big apartment. Floor
to ceiling windows offering him a view that would have been mesmerizing, wouldn't he have
been so focused on the plain silver ring, glistening on one of his slender fingers. Cold and
meaningless, a piece of metal he so dearly wished to be able to just throw away. To let go of
the weight he had to carry around.

There was a slight breeze from one of the windows, touching the soft skin of his powdered
cheeks and turning it a beautiful red. One that highlighted the beauty he was, moles more
evident now that the sun tickled along his light brown hair, down to his neck.

A fake fur coat was wrapped around his shoulders, accentuating the sharp edges of his jaw
and soft lips, dark brown eyes staring ahead into the distance and focusing on a random
house, just to get rid of the emptiness that threatened to take over. The beauty he held and the
expensive clothes he was allowed to wear couldn't be compared to the person he actually
wanted to be.

Someone who wasn't chained down to the ground, no way of being freed, with his eyes
forced to look ahead and witness the future that had been planned for him, replaying over and
over again. His own dreams crushed in the palms of his parents, falling to the ground like
ashes. So vulnerable and small that with one strong wind gust, everything would be gone.

This wasn't the life he wanted or had imagined.

This wasn't happiness, but it was what he got used to, he had to.

Slightly jolting up when he heard the sudden banging of a door, he sat properly and turned
around to see who had joined him, only to sigh and lean his head against one of his tender
hands, lips pursed with distaste, and eyes avoiding the man walking towards one of the
windows.

He was wearing an expensive suit, and his blonde hair was awfully perfect while being gelled
back behind his ears, his side profile presenting a handsome person. Someone he respected
and had known for many years, yet also someone who would never be able to make him
happy.

" I met up with your father, he asked if you are doing well."

" He could have called me if he really cared, Jiwoo. You know that," Baekhyun replied, his
eyes focused on his manicured nails now, noticing a slight crack in one of them, thinking he
would need to make a new appointment sometime. Hearing the hum from the taller man, he
didn't intend to look at him again, but was taken aback when he had reached out with a letter
in his hands.

" What is this?"

" Open it, I want you to read it."

There was no bite in his deep voice, and it made the smaller curious while gently opening the
papers, greeted by an announcement, one he was used to by now.

Dear Mr. Kim,

We are happy to announce the grand opening of your art gallery in our beautiful Amalfi.

The artists you are sponsoring are delighted to present their projects and offer a week-long
opportunity to gather information and experience.

A visit by you would bring all of us joy.

Art Gallery Distancia

" Amalfi? So you will travel to Italy this time?" Baekhyun asked, being used to the other's
business and tasks as well as his work based traveling. Something he usually kept his nose
out of, the whole thing way too complicated and exhausting for the smaller. Yet, this time he
felt like it wouldn't be as easy to escape.

" A three months stay. I will work together with the artists I am sponsoring and see if they
progressed. Furthermore, I will travel to different towns. You will come with me this time
and stay in Almafi, to keep an eye on everything. "

Taken aback by his words, he almost crumbled the letter in his nervous hands, with his
fingers holding the paper so tightly that he was scared of it cutting into his flesh. His throat
felt dry just like his voice, which was stuck within it for several seconds, until he finally was
able to stand up, expensive shoes clacking against the white tiles of the living room.

" Jiwoo, are you serious? Three months is a long time, and you know that I don't like to be
involved in your work. I don't like being involved with you."

Maybe it was harsh, but they both had been living like this for some time now. A relationship
purely because of the money and social status was something Baekhyun had been forced into
years ago. He had known the taller, but his parents had planned more than a simple
companionship.
There was no love or need. No kisses, hugs, no sex.

Nothing.

There had never been, and the smaller started to believe things like that were just written
down in books to make people fall into the trap of thinking it really existed. He obeyed his
parents' wish, he did what they wanted to, but that did not mean he wanted any of this.
Eyeing his fiancé from top to bottom and realizing that he was serious about what he just had
voiced out, Baekhyun huffed his breath and threw the letter onto the floor, heel of his shoes
crushing it into a mess of smudged letters, before he rushed down the hallway to his own
bedroom, knowing he had to tag along anyway.

It had been going on for years, and usually, he enjoyed it because the young man was able to
visit other countries and gather information for his own work, which was writing. Creativity
often found him, but a change of surroundings heightened that experience. Nevertheless,
through the years, he also grew unhappier, seeing it more as being forced to spend time with
the other rather than anything else.

Sitting down on his king sized bed with the pillows all fluffed up and the blanket laying over
the mattress too perfectly, Baekhyun truly wondered if he would ever be able to do the things
he wanted, needed, and seeked. Life had been kind to him when it came to money, but that
was it.

He realized that it couldn't buy him happiness, love and trust, and that ultimately made him
the person he was today.

Emotionless, cold and sad.

A depressed soul which was stuck between two walls, those that continued to press closer
and closer, threatening to ruin him one day.

Maybe Italy would be able to make him momentarily forget the struggles he had been facing,
the only thing he decided to look forward to.

_______________________

Amalfi, Italy

The waves were crashing against the shore loudly like the force of nature they were when he
abruptly woke up, hair a complete mess, and eyes so swollen from the night before that he
was unable to make out his own room.

It was ironic that his alarm went off just as he finally regained full consciousness. The shrill
sound so loud in his ears that he groaned deeply. Nevertheless, he knew today was a special
day, so he didn't waste time laying around and instead got up to open his windows, the fresh
air hitting his bronze skin and making him glow like the sin itself.

His long black hair was stroking along his face, covering his golden brown eyes, while his
feet were tapping over the wooden floor, tank top slipping off of his broad shoulder. The
bathroom was quite messy and he knew he had to clean up soon, right now though, he
definitely had to shave off his stubble.

Yawning and stretching himself, he reached for the letter that was laying on one of the
cupboards, a soft smile grazing over his face while fully knowing the context of it. After
years of painting and trying to make his dream become a reality, there was finally a gallery
with not one, but three of his paintings displayed, the grand opening being tonight. On top of
that he would be allowed to finally meet his sponsor again, and he just knew it would be
nerve wrecking.

Dreams becoming a reality was something that did not happen that often, and he knew he
was still a small unknown artist, but the opportunity he had been given was something he
wouldn't let pass by. Gazing over to the expensive suit he had borrowed, Chanyeol knew it
was a known brand, but he simply had forgotten the name, something he didn't value that
much.

It was the thing he had been dreading the most, not being used to wearing fine clothes and
being in the spotlight, but it was only for today. Only one day and he knew he would survive
this. Growing up poor but with a loving family, he learned to focus on the small things, those
that made him happy, and he was thrilled being allowed to make money with that.

When the clouds turned into a burning pink and the coast slowly cleared from people,
Chanyeol finally finished his look for the night, the brush in his hands small but useful to
keep his hair up in a manbun. The suit seemed to be tailored for his body and his alone,
smoothing along his arms and legs like second skin and making him look like a gentleman.

The gallery wasn't far away, and the path he had to walk down was lit by candles and fairy
lights, something the villagers loved to display at any given moment. Those moments were
quite romantic and calm, one thing the tall man used to paint a lot. Right now though, it did
little to relax his nerves, and he tried his hardest to not display it on his face.

Leaning his head against the cold glass window of the expensive car he sat in, Baekhyun
stroked along the necklace he was wearing, falling right across his tender chest, which was
slightly exposed due to the blouse he was wearing. A soft white that accentuated the paleness
of his skin and combined with the fake black fur coat, it made him seem smaller than he
actually was.

That was the exact thing he had craved for though, disappearing within the layers of his
clothes so he would be able to avoid curious eyes. He knew he was pretty, and his fiancé
shamelessly used that to his advantage, treating him like a trophy everywhere they went. It
quickly could make one hate themselves, and Baekhyun sadly enough, already thought about
that a lot.

At least the night view of the beach they passed by was pretty enough to distract him, a
momentary thought of running there and just laying in the sand for hours crossing his mind.
It was summer after all, the nights colder than the heat over the day, but before he could get
lost in his very comfortable thoughts, they reached their destination, a huge gallery with tons
of people walking the streets.

" Baekhyun, try to behave," Jiwoo said before getting out of the car, his voice cold and
uncaring, and yet, it made the smaller chuckle dryly, always being the prime example of a
behaved kid.

Getting out as well and wrapping the coat around himself, he reluctantly let the other man
reach for Baekhyun's hand to place it on his own arm, a gesture only for the eyes of many,
not for themselves. A lot of them were speaking in Italian, logically, but there were also some
who spoke in English, making it easier for him to at least not feel like a complete outsider.

The champagne he had been offered was bitter and terribly slow when it trickled down his
throat, but there followed a comfortable numbness and maybe that was the thing that made
him see everything in brighter colors, especially a certain painting that caught his eyes.

Fields of flowers in every color thinkable, a beautiful dark sky with the moon shining on the
little gifts of earth. He loved art, but this was the first one that made him speechless and
actually feel warmth within his chest, gaze glued to it even though he was being dragged by
his fiancé. They stopped right across it and he only stopped staring when he heard the taller's
voice raise in volume.

There was a man in a black suit right in front of them, back turned while helping a woman
clean up the water she had splashed on the floor, the gentle gesture making Baekhyun smile
while patiently waiting for whatever would happen next.

" Park Chanyeol?" Jiwoo said, and the Korean name made the smaller feel slightly intrigued
about who he actually was when he finally turned around.

There was a spark on both sides, an intense sort of pull which disappeared when Jiwoo spoke
up again and reached out his hand. Neither Chanyeol nor Baekhyun were able to stop staring
at each other. It was as if they had so much to say but no time to do so, especially when the
smaller was supposed to reach his own hand out as well, feeling the other's way bigger one
wrap around his slender fingers.

It was warm, almost comparable to the soft heat of a freshly lit candle. And it was funny, how
that also predicted the danger that came with it, because one wrong move and you could burn
yourself on something so small.

" And you may be?"

" Byun Baekhyun, my fiancé. It is a pleasure to finally meet you, Mr. Park."

There was shock and brief disappointment in Chanyeol's eyes, those soft brown ones that
made the smaller feel lightheaded and glued to his frame, and he could reciprocate that
feeling because if he would have been able to keep their engagement a secret, he would have
done so.
Shaking his hand but then retreating it again, the taller followed the movement and missed
the sweet warmth for a moment, but then decided to stay professional and greet his sponsor
the way he was supposed to, slight bow giving him the chance to stare at the smaller man
some more, secretly.

" That should be my words, Mr. Kim. It is great to meet you and be able to show you just
what you have been sponsoring for the last few years," Chanyeol said, his deep voice
resonating in the gallery and making Baekhyun's ears tingle with a spark of joy.

Trying to ignore his own curiosity, the smaller continued to look around the room and
stopped his eyes on the flower field painting once again, completely ignoring the
conversation that was happening right beside him and instead speaking up, " So, is that one
yours, Mr. Park?"

Shyly meeting his gaze, he looked away quite fast as if he had been burned, his fiancé
oblivious to the way he was acting, while Chanyeol couldn't stop being mesmerized, nodding
his head softly and walking closer to the big drawing. His thick fingers stroked over the
moon and then down to the flowers, momentarily getting lost in the memories of producing
this art piece.

" I drew this a year ago. It is actually a known place on this island, truly inspiring. Also I
would appreciate it if you call me Chanyeol, there is no need for distance through names."

Hearing his words, Baekhyun actually did not quite know what rushed through his veins, but
it was unfamiliar and new, warm overall. A sweet feeling he suddenly craved. He ended up
nodding his head, the glass of champagne grazing his petal shaped lips several times before
he took a small sip, alcohol burning down his throat.

" Baekhyun, I am being called over by the gallery coordinator. You stay here and look
around," his fiancé said, and it wasn't even a suggestion but more of a final decision, the
bitterness on his tongue not coming from the bubbly liquid this time. Chanyeol had his eyes
on him, and the smaller wondered if he even had looked away once ever since they
introduced themselves.

The slight blush wandering over his cheekbones wasn't from the beverage, and he knew it
was obvious. His slender hands quickly fumbling up for his coat to wrap it more around
himself and practically exposing how nervous and uncomfortable he was, making the taller
perk up before walking closer, his eyes and smile gentle and calming.

" Should I show you around?"

And if there was a perfect expression for relief, Baekhyun was wearing it on his sleeves.

" Y-yes, that would be really nice."

The gallery actually wasn't that big, but the paintings displayed were so mesmerizing that it
made up for the rather short experience and Baekhyun, for once, felt at peace. Maybe it was
the friendly people or maybe actually the presence of the other, but he didn't feel dumb, and
he definitely didn't want to disappear into thin air.

Chanyeol was walking a little ahead of him and talking about the things he pointed at,
making the smaller wonder how his life had worked out up till now and how it felt to do the
thing he truly seemed to love, his dream profession. Maybe there was some part of him that
was jealous of his freedom and talent, but on the other hand, there were always two sides of a
coin. Who knew if everything really was as perfect as it seemed.

Placing the champagne glass on a random table he passed by, Baekhyun crossed his arms
over his chest and stopped at a painting which displayed a cornfield and a red car standing in
the middle of it. Quite aesthetic and screaming happiness, something he so dearly wanted to
feel at least once.

" Excuse me, um, Chanyeol. Who is the painter of this one?"

Turning around at the sweet melodic voice of the smaller, Chanyeol gazed over at the
painting and had to bite back a smile, instead getting closer to kneel down and touch the little
sign that was on the bottom of the frame, " It is one of mine. It seems that you took quite a
liking?"

Stuttering for a reply and ending up huffing his breath, Baekhyun removed an invisible string
from his coat, just to seem busy, before trying to avoid the taller's eyes even though that was
quite difficult. Especially when he just seemed to tease him on all possible levels.

" I mean… It is really pretty. Did you have a certain spark when you drew it?"

" I certainly did, but I can't remember. Sometimes I just seem to instantly forget them,"
Chanyeol replied with some brief unknown emotion rushing through his glance, having stood
up properly again while his big hands were now diving into the depths of his pockets. A
movement Baekhyun involuntarily followed, before he flinched.

The sudden calling of his name made him cautious and snap out of the comfortable bubble he
almost had drowned in, eyes sadly enough witnessing his fiancé coming over once more. A
card in between his hands.

" Ah I hope I am not interrupting the tour, but I will have to kidnap Baekhyun now. We have
to greet some more people. It was nice to meet you, Mr. Park, and I'm sure we will meet each
other quite often in the next three months."

Something about those last words left the smaller's heart to skip a beat, the simple smile of
the artist setting his cheeks on fire. He shouldn't have felt the way he did while witnessing it,
but suppressing his emotions was impossible for once, instead moving his hand in a cute little
wave to bid his goodbye.

Chanyeol, on the other hand, bit his full lips while watching both of them leave, the smaller
having left an impact he didn't quite understand and yet craved. Maybe it was instant
chemistry, a forbidden one. Gazing at them until they disappeared in the crowd of people he
turned around to stare at his painting once again.
Three months .

A small smile grazing over his lips while he repeated the words inside of his head.

_____________________

" I will be off for a business meeting, go take a look around town if you feel like it."

The voice actually felt far away, and Baekhyun realized it was Jiwoo when he heard the front
door of the apartment close. Still in bed and under the silk sheets, he had been happy that
there were two bedrooms, his being the one with the view of the ocean. Admittedly, it was
beautiful and so calming, something that actually made him feel like home and not the house
he lived in back in Seoul.

His brown hair was a mess on top of his head, his satin robe slipping off of his tender
shoulders before he shivered briefly due to the morning air. That was also the moment it fully
sank in that he was alone, his fiancé probably gone for the day, and the relief was actually
almost shameful. Yet, he couldn't hide the fact that he was excited about it, immediately
stepping out of bed to walk onto the balcony.

The architecture of this town was mesmerizing, with the houses close to the cliffs, the beach
right beneath him, and the forests on top of hills. Something he would like to see, but wasn't
sure he would be able to in those three months. There weren't many people awake, it seemed,
but his tired eyes found the guy who sat in the sand, paper and coal in his hands while he
seemed to draw whatever was on his mind.

He seemed comfortable and happy, which made his thoughts wander to Chanyeol and his
charming smile, the memory of it setting Baekhyun's face on fire and to instead walk back
inside, trying to forget whatever feeling just surged through his bones. The robe was slipping
off of his small frame even more until he threw it onto the mattress, undressing completely to
step under the shower real quick.

His body felt cold and sensitive, even though it was quite hot outside which ultimately made
him choose only a light blouse and jeans, quite unusual but needed for the day. There was
always some sort of extravagance he carried around, his life having taught him how to act
and look to seem perfect and yet, he seemed to feel more comfortable in jeans than those
pants he usually wore.

Letting his hair be the soft mess it was, he wore some brown fitting shoes and a small bag to
carry his keys before stepping outside and being greeted with the sun burning down onto his
skin, not being used to this sort of weather nor the people. They were all quite friendly and
gentle, which made it easier to show that he didn't know his way around. And that missing
knowledge ultimately led him to a small supermarket, the lemons displayed outside being
huge.

Literally bigger than any he ever saw at a store back home, slender fingers reaching out to
pick one up and look at it a bit more detailed. His thirst for lemon juice suddenly was quite
big and it made him awkwardly gesture for the cashier who came rushing over with a soft
grin.
" Excuse me, do you speak English?" He asked, only receiving a small head shake which
made his face flush red, the embarrassment, of not being able to properly communicate, huge.
His English wasn't the best in the first place, and he wondered if he even asked correctly,
eyes nervously looking around when he suddenly felt a presence beside him, shadow casting
over his frame.

" Baekhyun? Do you need help?"

Chanyeol stared at the smaller with an almost teasing gaze, and he did it purposely, finding it
adorable how conflicted the smaller man seemed to be. Baekhyun, on the other hand, just got
even redder which wandered down his soft neck and chest, hand involuntary letting go of the
lemon, the taller catching it midair.

" C-Chanyeol. Um, to be honest I wanted to buy lemons but I can't speak Italian…" he
replied, stroking his glowing brown locks behind his ear subconsciously, but gaining the
attention of the tall man, who looked even more handsome than the day before, dimpled
smile so comforting and gentle.

" Tre limoni per favore. "

" Ovviamente, solo un momento."

Feeling his chest tighten for a second while listening to his voice, Baekhyun watched them
both interact and the taller pay for the fruits, his brain not fast enough to react and instead
accept the paper bag Chanyeol gave him.

" It's on me, those are really good. What are you doing here anyway? And where is your
fiancé?" the taller asked, hands in his pockets while he squeezed his eyes together due to the
sun. It made the smaller feel lucky that he was turned away from the huge ball of warmth,
gaze wandering from his lemons over to the other.

" He is in a business meeting, so I thought I could explore the town a bit, but as you can
see...I'm a bit lost."

Watching the tall man start walking over the street towards the beach, he didn't know what
came over him but he immediately followed like a lost puppy, which he more or less was.
Chanyeol was only wearing a tank top and some shorts and it was extremely hard to not stare
at his muscular arms and the sweat that made his bronze skin glow.

Truly a beautiful person.

For a second he wanted to ask where he was going, when he saw the other man stopping and
taking his shoes off to walk over the sand, his head almost immediately imagining the feel of
it and who was he to not follow, when his day had no plans anyway? Carefully slipping out of
his own ones he held them in his left hand and the bag in the other, rushing to his side only to
be met with silence, a comfortable one at that.

" Say, am I allowed to ask how old you are, Chanyeol?"

The black haired man suddenly had his eyes on him, a curious gaze wandering through them
before he leaned down to pick up some sand and letting it rain through his palm, movement
relaxed, " Of course, you can ask me. I'm twenty-five. "

" Oh, then you are as old as Jiwoo and also older than me, interesting. You look pretty young
to be honest," Baekhyun replied while wiggling his toes through the warm sand, a sort of
feeling he seemed to miss even though he had never felt it before.

" Can I also ask you something?"

Nodding his head at Chanyeol's question, he watched the other walk closer to the water and
stop right in front of it, the waves crashing over his feet like gentle strokes. Maybe he wasn’t
supposed to feel so content and calm with someone he barely knew, but Baekhyun couldn’t
have cared less when it made him this comfortable.

That was at least, until he heard the question.

“ Are you content with your life?”

Almost dropping the bag with lemons, he kneeled down to place it on the sand and took some
minutes to avoid the tall man’s eyes, his words shaking him to his core but not because he
liked it. That was a question he had asked himself as well, many times, but he stopped at one
point because the answer had always been the same. No.

Reaching his hand out to touch the water, he knew Chanyeol was eyeing him, and the older
man definitely thought it was weird that he took so long with his reply, while Baekhyun’s
fingers stroked the wet sand to calm his own nerves. The reflection of the sun on the sea was
beautiful, mesmerizing almost, but the smaller knew there was a limit to everything, which
ultimately made him stand up again.

“ What an odd question to ask, but...I’m not sure,” he said, briefly looking if his bag was still
standing in the sand, before meeting the other’s gaze, and he immediately regretted it.
Chanyeol seemed like he could see right through him and his tense nerves, the truth laying on
his tongue, just waiting for the right moment to be spoken into existence, " What do you
define as content ?"

" Well, being happy and satisfied with your life, for example. "

And that was the exact moment Baekhyun just had to sigh loudly, hands shaking from the
way he tried to hold back whatever emotion was running through his veins. Something that
battled the waves when it came to noise, his heart beating louder than the sea which was so
much bigger in comparison.

" Let me ask you, Chanyeol, do I look happy in your eyes?"

There was a long second in which Chanyeol looked at the smaller, his golden eyes so soft and
focused while examining Baekhyun's face. He didn't know him, he didn't know anything
about his life or likings, but he knew when someone was unsatisfied or simply just sad, and
he could see both of those things in the other's expression.
" I-" he started to reply, but ended up being interrupted by a loud ringing of a phone,
Baekhyun shrieking up as if he saw a ghost before reaching for the mobile device and
answering the call.

" Hello?"

"Baekhyun. I'm back, where are you? Did you get lost ?" Jiwoo asked, voice cold and
uncaring. He was used to this sort of conversation, but that didn't mean it didn't hurt.

" No I didn't. I am at the beach, why?"

"We have a lunch appointment in two hours. Come back."

Ending the call without replying again, he pushed the phone back into his pants and reached
for his bag, Chanyeol's gaze on him. Baekhyun had to admit that the tall man emitted a calm
aura, one he never had felt before not even with his own parents. There was some sense of
understanding and that ultimately made him just bow slightly, the disappointment probably
visible on his face.

" I'm sorry, but I will have to leave you now. Thank you again...for the lemons!"

About to leave, the smaller could sense there was some unspoken question between them,
hanging midair and so close to just grab and make it burst. It wasn't usual for him to even
care or reciprocate something out of own intentions, but if Chanyeol wanted to say
something, he wanted to hear it no matter what, " Do you want to ask me something?"

" Ah...No, it's okay. I will just ask you the next time we see each other."

Together with the loud waves behind them, his heart did a flip he didn't want and needed.
One that made his chest hurt at a spot he thought was frozen. A feeling he had only felt once
in his life and yet the taller seemed to make it appear with ease. Ridiculous.

" Then, until next time."

And while walking back through the soft sand, leaving the artist behind as well as the warmth
of the sun, Baekhyun realized that this trip, maybe, was the best decision Jiwoo ever had
made. Not for them two but for the smaller to grow and find back to his spirits. It was only
the second day, but there was something that made him feel like it would only get better and
he sincerely started to hope for that.

____________________

Having lunch with the other man was something he actually despised a whole lot, simply
because he was treated like a price he had to display, the almost unironical ownership that
was unspoken between them. And when it were business meetings, Baekhyun felt even more
like an outsider, his opinion not asked, thoughts well hidden in the back of his head.

That evening wasn't any different, and it was way more difficult due to him only
understanding half of it. Honestly speaking, he was tired of those situations, viewed as the
dumb fiancé who was probably only good for a quick fuck. Something he didn't even want to
imagine to happen between them. Not now or ever. Just having to feel Jiwoo's hands on him,
for show, was already enough to make his gag reflex known, and the other man knew that.

Waking up for the third day, on this unknown island with secrets he so dearly wanted to
explore, Baekhyun sighed in content when he realized he was alone, his fiancé probably off
for breakfast with one of the artists. He did not need to attend all the time, and he used those
moments of freedom for himself and his mind. Health was something he appreciated a lot,
even though the sleeping pills on his nightstand laughed at him in despise.

Insomnia.

There were periods of time in his life, where he suffered from it badly, to the point he was
forced by the doctors to take a break, to finally try to find back to the ground. Nowadays, it
was still present and robbed his dreams, the pills being his escape from the harsh reality.
Frustratedly pushing the bottle into the drawer, he got up and stretched his arms over his
head, realizing that the weather could turn bad on an island as well.

Dark clouds were proceedingly getting closer, the waves restless and loud, but something
about the darkness calmed him down. It made him feel grounded and that ultimately led him
to sit on the couch in the living room, after being done with his morning routine. Only
dressed in soft silk shorts and his black robe, enough to keep his body hidden and also not too
warm for the current temperatures.

Actually, Baekhyun loved to feel expensive fabrics sliding over his skin, the only thing he let
this close to himself at this point. He treasured himself and he knew his worth, yet there were
moments of weakness, especially when he was together with Jiwoo. That man truly had not
an ounce of love or respect in his body, his self-love practiced a bit too much.

Slightly flinching when the sudden rain crashed against the windows so loudly that it
sounded like thunder, he placed his hot coffee on the small table and got up, ribbon around
his waist loosening the slightest bit. Closing both of the big glass doors, he gazed out onto the
terrace for a while longer until he heard the doorbell ring and that definitely made him
curious.

Without thinking twice, he walked over and was sure to be met with his fiancé, who maybe
forgot his keys, but what he saw was a slightly wet Chanyeol, long black hair messy on top of
his head. And the same second their eyes met and he could see the taller letting them wander
down his body briefly, he also noticed that his robe wasn't covering every part of his chest
due to the earlier incident, revealing a small part of his porcelain skin.

The thing was, Baekhyun didn't care and that scared him immensely. He didn't even mind in
the slightest that a stranger witnessed part of his naked unblemished body, he rather bathed in
the attention like a star on stage, receiving standing ovations. And Chanyeol definitely gazed
at his chest, and he also definitely saw the glimpse of a tender pink nipple grazing against the
silky fabric, his heart hammering against his chest for various reasons.

" C-Chanyeol? What are you doing here?" He asked, voice cracking because he genuinely
was surprised, eyes wandering over his sinfully wet arms down to his hands, seeing the letter
he was holding. It was perfect, no crinkle or stain, knowing he protected it well while rushing
over.

" I'm sorry if I turned up unannounced, but is Jiwoo at home?"

Softly shaking his head, he moved to the side to show the apartment being empty, his hand
now finally reaching for his robe to hide the exposed skin once more and offer some room to
step inside, " Do you want to come in and wait for him to return? The rain is really bad right
now."

It was an awful excuse to have his presence closer for a bit longer because it was obvious that
the taller didn't mind getting wet. After all, it was almost 20° outside, no cold to fear.
Showing Chanyeol where to take off his shoes, he walked to the bathroom, small feet
wandering over the white tiles and coming back with a towel for the other's hair. And he
really just had good intentions, but he regretted it the moment the taller opened his bun, long
silky hair falling over his face so beautifully that he was in trance for several seconds.

He wasn't supposed to feel like that and it ultimately led him to sit down on the couch once
more, slim legs crossing over each other. The coffee was still hot, and it felt good between his
palms, eyes briefly closing to get into that feeling, before he gazed back at the taller, taken
aback when he already was staring at him.

" Can I ask what that letter is? The one in your hands?"

" Oh, of course you can. It is an invitation for dinner," Chanyeol replied, his big hands
holding the small paper in between his fingers, towel now wrapped around his neck. And his
eyes, well, they were still stealing glances at the beautiful man he was talking to. Those
which he actually should keep to himself, simply because this was dangerous territory he was
playing in.

" Dinner? I guess to talk about your art and process?"

Placing his cup down onto the table after he finished his coffee, Baekhyun offered the other a
seat right across from him, eyes constantly glued on his body and the way he moved. There
was just something ethereal about him, exotic almost and that part made the smaller be so
curious and intrigued. They were all alone in this huge apartment, a storm outside and yet it
felt like the space between them wasn't even big enough to fit them two into it.

A thought that had crossed his mind the first time they had met as well. Shockingly to say the
least.

" Exactly. I know he is probably busy, but I would like to talk to him and invite him to dinner
in a small pizzeria I've grown up with. You are very much considered for the invite as well.
Only if you want to tho-"

" I want to," he replied way too eager and fast, tongue stumbling over his small lips before he
could even process his own words properly, which left his cheeks to burn like the sun,
redness stroking over them almost tenderly, " I mean, I love pizza. I would love to tag along."
Hearing this and knowing it was an opportunity to escape his monotonous structured life
especially now that he just sat it out at the rented apartment, Baekhyun jumped on that offer
even if he now looked like a complete fool. One that was staring at Chanyeol like he was his
savior, ridiculous actually.

" That is good to know then. I can give you the letter as well, so you can give it your fiancé,"
the taller suggested, hand reaching out to lay the papers down on the table, but he actually
didn't want to leave just yet, and the smaller obviously thought the same when he suddenly
stood up in his beautiful robe, the black accentuating his skin. He really was gorgeous but he
seemed to carry so many secrets.

Following the way his legs moved against the silk, he watched him grab a glass and pour
water into it, hand shaking the slightest bit, maybe out of nervousness. Baekhyun, though,
knew it was because he was excited. Excited about the other being present and them talking,
which made his day out to be already one of the better ones.

" It was awfully rude of me to not offer something to drink, so here you go," he replied,
slightly leaning down and knowing his chest was exposed for that one second he was in that
position, cheeks not having calmed down from the redness.

The weather was relaxing slowly, with the clouds growing lighter, but he seriously didn't
want him to leave, not yet. Sitting back down and crossing his arms over his chest, he eyed
Chanyeol and watched him drink before remembering their conversation from the day before,
lips tingling with curiosity, " Say, what did you want to ask me yesterday? Perhaps you can
tell me now?"

It had kept him up at night for a bit longer, if he was being honest. The stare he had been met
with having been so soft and focused that he just wanted to know what had laid on the tall
man's tongue. Maybe he was overthinking, but he had imagined a lot of scenarios, blame his
profession of being a writer for doing that. And now that he sensed an opportunity, he truly
wanted to just dive in without regrets.

" Oh right. I don't know how to voice it out," Chanyeol started to say, the glass in his palms
cold, yet his hands sweated profusely. His whole life was filled with his pull towards art, his
need to frame memories that burned into the back of his head like fireworks. It was an
addiction, and the moment he met Baekhyun and looked into his eyes for the first time, he
knew he wanted him to be part of those memories.

What he also knew and what he sensed was that the younger man was nothing less but
difficult and probably distant. At least that was what it felt like, knowing his question would
be a roll of a dice, luck only being on his side if he truly had a good day. The more he thought
about it, though, the faster the time went by, Baekhyun's curious eyes on him until he had
enough courage to speak up once more, " Would you be okay with me drawing a portrait of
you?"

Taken aback by his words and not knowing how to properly react, the brown haired man
rubbed his fingers along his arm in thought, lips suddenly feeling dry. He had been told that
he was a true beauty his whole life, over and over again by different people. Those who were
powerful and rich, their opinions nothing short of unimportant, and it shrunk down his
confidence of really accepting the fact that he indeed was handsome.

He knew portraits usually were an expensive game of art, something to hold on to and look
back to. But why was it so hard to accept the fact that he was now the center of attention?
Chanyeol seemed so genuine about it, and he also was so gentle and sweet when they talked,
but still, he was scared. Scared of exposing something he didn't want a stranger to see.
Something he’d rather kept to himself and that ultimately made him think way too hard.

" It is an honor, really, but I don't think I am suitable for something like this. Portraits are a lot
of work, and am I really worth it?"

His words hurt him a way he thought he already forgot to feel, soft lip captured between his
teeth while he stroked up and down his arms and there wasn't even time for a reply when the
front door opened to reveal Jiwoo, clad in an expensive suit and a umbrella in his hands. He
didn't seem to notice the situation going on until he saw Chanyeol sitting in the corner. His
usual stoic expression turning into that of a smile.

" Oh,, we have a visitor," he said, walking over to where they were sitting and eyeing
Baekhyun so intensely that his skin started to be covered with goosebumps. Some sort of
disappointment and judgment in his eyes, " Baekhyun, you should have dressed
appropriately, but I guess you didn't have the time."

The mockery was obvious, but his words also made the smaller feel disgusted with himself,
knowing Jiwoo meant that he had shown skin and not little of it. Sometimes, he truly affected
his moods and right now, it hurt, because Chanyeol was there, watching the scene unfold and
the burning redness on Baekhyun's cheeks wander down to his neck and ears.

" I will e-excuse myself then, have a good day, Chanyeol."

His words were spoken without giving any of them a chance to intertwine, his feet carrying
him back to his bedroom within seconds, eyes hurting from the angry tears threatening to fall.
He was used to being ridiculed and unmasked, and it usually didn't bother him at all, but why
did an innocent and sweet man have to witness it? And why did Chanyeol look more hurt
than Baekhyun himself?

Locking the door to just have his space and quietness, he grabbed a pillow and his blanket,
before laying it down in front of the terrace door, his body following suit to climb under it
and gaze at the ocean and the dark clouds while he covered himself with the warm fabric.

Sleep sounded nice even if the day wasn't over just yet, but if it meant he could escape this
weird feeling he had in his chest and also forget about the embarrassment from only moments
prior, he wanted to engulf it, eyes slowly falling shut until all he saw was darkness.

__________________

It had been a day like any other when his world had tumbled to the ground. Funny actually,
when knowing that it never had been safe anyway. His parents loved him, no question, but
they also saw him as something they had to shape and form to their liking, making him do the
things they weren’t able to in their own lives. In his early days, he already knew he liked boys,
and he also knew he wanted to be an author in the future, both things they had accepted.

But for a prize.

Fame, fortune and money were the things that his family saw as important and necessary,
and Baekhyun honestly never had learned what actual love or happiness felt like. The things
he often wrote about while actually not even understanding or having experienced half of it.

There had been the slightest spark of hope, really minimal, when he had been introduced to
Jiwoo for the first time. Their hands meeting in a soft handshake and actually honest smiles
having been exchanged. But knowing that they would be engaged for the social status and the
gain through that, had thrown his beliefs out of the nearest window. And it proved to be right
when they never really connected on an intimate level nor on a friendly one. It was cold,
almost icy, and it rotted his soul over the years.

When the time had come, they moved in together. An apartment with separate bedrooms, their
eyes never meeting and if they did, then out of accident. Baekhyun lost that spark again, the
hope and need, and it turned him into the person he was today. Unapproachable, depressed
and most importantly, alone. His soul was wandering around in search of someone who
actually wanted to understand him and try to, a dream that shrunk over the past years.

And he knew he could seem arrogant, cold and perhaps even mean, but those were things he
had never wanted to represent, and deep down, there was still the happy and hopeful child
with the need of self expression and a love seeking heart. He never let go of that part of him
just because he prayed for the day it could actually be awakened and to his surprise,
nowadays, he felt like that wasn’t as impossible as he had thought.

The weather was unpredictable and it was once again, obvious, when the day started with
roaring sunshine, no signs of the storm that had crossed the ocean the day before. His eyes
were hurting from the tears he held back the whole night, too proud to cry because of the
blunt exposure Jiwoo had put him under. Now, he was holding a glass of red wine in his
slender hand, lips turning a brighter color due to the alcohol influence. His legs were covered
in soft black pants, loose around them this time because it felt good when the air hit the skin,
a fitting black blouse exposing his collarbones.

Baekhyun looked expensive, but when did he not? His eyes were decorated with silver glitter,
accentuating the brown color of them, hair as soft as ever and for the first time since they had
landed on the island, he did not reach for his usual fur coat, knowing it was way too warm for
that. Still, there was less to focus on, and it led his eyes to stare at his plain engagement ring.
It wasn’t even shiny anymore, he never invested the time to let it be cleaned, because for him
it was an accessory, something he didn’t feel a thing for and would it suddenly get lost, he
would not care.

“ Are you ready?”

“ I’ve been ready for over an hour now, Jiwoo. You took way too long in the bathroom.”

With every sip of the dark red liquid, his tongue got loose as well, and it proved to be right
because the other tall man seemed pissed, his blond hair so full of gel that Baekhyun wanted
to laugh. He didn’t, though, and instead stood up to follow his fiancé out of the door, a car
waiting for them downstairs, “ Keep your sarcasm to yourself for today, Baekhyun. I told you
several times that it is not welcomed during meetings, and just because you decided to drink
does not justify your behavior.”

The smaller did not have an alcohol problem, he really didn’t, but it was like a punch to his
chest, hearing those words and making him indeed look like someone who was addicted.
Words were laying on his tongue, mean ones and would it have been any other business
partner, he would have spit them into Jiwoo’s face, but it was Chanyeol, and he took a liking
to the tall man and his art, making him silently sit down in the car and stare out of the
window like he loved to, a welcomed distraction for the uncomfortable feeling in his
stomach.

The restaurant, they halted in front of, was truly small just like the other had told him, but the
atmosphere was amazing and the scent of food made his lips tingle with hunger, eyes
suddenly way livelier when they saw Chanyeol standing outside in just a white button up and
black pants, so legere yet handsome. Refusing to take Jiwoo’s hand this time, he stepped out
of the car and walked over the short street himself, eyes meeting those of the other’s.

“ Good evening, Baekhyun, and good evening, Jiwoo, I hope you both are hungry,” Chanyeol
smiled, his eyes gazing more at the smaller than at his actual sponsor, big hands shaking both
theirs but holding Baekhyun’s way more gentle. Guiding both of them inside, they sat down
at a table right across the bar, an old wooden one fitting the overall rustical interior.

Looking around the restaurant, the smaller noticed not many people being present, but those
who were, looked so content and calm, brief jealousy raking through his body up to his
already red cheeks and that was also the same moment a waiter came with a bottle of red
wine,“ Can I offer a glass of our primitivo?”

“ For me, yes, not for my fiancé though, he already had a bit too much,” Jiwoo joked before
Baekhyun even had the chance to speak up, the atmosphere light around them, but an actual
humiliation making his eyes glossy from the way he was feeling, especially when seeing how
Chanyeol stared at him, both confused and interested. It was more than embarrassing, and he
did not even know how to justify the truth, why did he want to do so in the first place? When
the tall artist was just a mere business partner.

“ For me as well then, one glass of your wine,” Chanyeol added, hands having rolled up his
sleeves, while loose strands of his long hair were hanging over his sharp features, his lips
curled into a smile when his eyes met Baekhyun’s, “ And one Limoncello for him, please.”
“ Limoncello?” the smaller asked, once the waiter had left, his curiosity bigger and faster
than his brain could process, whole body avoiding to even press the slightest against that of
his fiancè’s.

“ A liquor made out of lemons and only the size of a shot, so you can at least take the first sip
of this evening with us.”

“ That is nice of you, Chanyeol,” Jiwoo said, but it was obvious that he seemed to be slightly
ticked off about the whole situation. Baekhyun knew him, and he knew the eyebrow twitch
he did when he was close to being pissed and yet, he couldn’t bring himself to feel bad about
it or guilty, the other’s gesture of ordering for him speeding his heartbeat up.

After ordering spinach pizza and two different sorts of pasta the taller had suggested,
Baekhyun was left with the last small piece of dough which he continuously moved over the
space of his plate, one ear listening to the conversation of the other two older men. His eyes,
often time, found those of Chanyeol, a simple friendly gaze but enough to make him think.

Think about the artist and his talent, his gentle way of speaking and acting and also being the
complete opposite of the men the smaller had met in his life so far. It was most probably the
alcohol speaking because the small limoncello he had drunk was strong, his thoughts being
quite loose at this point.

Legs bouncing under the table with nervousness and anxiety, he felt like an outsider, the
reflection in the window showing a depressed man who seemed to hide all the pain and
sadness under his makeup. Ridiculous actually, how easily it was for Baekhyun to see himself
in a bad light, lips forming a sour smile that ended with a tired giggle.

One of his hands was still holding the small glass, pointer finger moving over the rim when it
suddenly was grabbed, realizing that Jiwoo was stopping him from moving, " Can't you show
the least bit of respect for our guest, instead of laughing to yourself? I know you don't want to
be here, but this is still my job."

Listening to his whispered words, he couldn't help but be affected in a bad way, eyes burning
due to him not blinking them for several seconds, his hand uncomfortably in the hold of his
fiancé. His words were harsh and embarrassed him, even though he knew Chanyeol probably
didn't hear it, but he just couldn't avoid feeling like a wreck.

There had not been one single positive remark in the years they had known each other, not
one, but why did he have to make him feel like this in front of someone else? Especially
someone who should not be involved in the dirty and ruthless deal they were actually living
by. If it would have been any other situation, Baekhyun would have countered like he always
did, but not this time.

Not when he knew he was close to crying, the alcohol empowering his emotions and
especially when Chanyeol was already more than confused, his eyes telling a story the brown
haired man wasn't able to read. And instead of continuing like everything was okay, he stood
up, blouse exposing his chest a bit more while he frantically stroked his hair behind his ear,
an act of nervousness.

" Please excuse me, I-I need to use the restroom."

It was weird and obviously more than a fight. Chanyeol knew that and worriedly watched
Baekhyun leave towards the toilets, focus momentarily on the way he stumbled his way to
the door, ready to just stand up and help him, when Jiwoo cleared his throat, a glass in his
hands.

" You know, relationship things. He can be quite extreme sometimes, high maintenance and
such. I'm sure you noticed, " he chuckled as if it was the funniest story he had ever told
someone, but the taller knew better than ridicule him and instead forced out a brief smile.

" I don't have experience with engagements, but I'm sure you will be able to talk it out. We
have reached the end of our dinner anyway, which brings me to a question."

Drinking the last bit of his wine, Chanyeol dabbed the corners of his mouth, not breaking the
eye contact with his sponsor before putting on an act of respect and support, eyes gleaming
with unshed hope, " I wanted to draw your fiancé. Only a portrait of course, for my new
project, but he is quite against it, it seems."

" Oh, a portrait? Well, isn't that a wonderful thing. He can be difficult, but I am sure it would
be a good idea to talk to him again, and I agree to this, in case you wanted to hear my
opinion. It will be good publicity to work together with the people I sponsor."

Some parts of his words seemed derogatory, painting Baekhyun out to be only useful for
situations like those, and Chanyeol wasn't sure if he was imagining it or if it was the truth.
Which is also why he didn't notice the smaller walking over until he stood in front of the
table, hands shaking and hiding behind his back.

" I don't feel so good, I would like to leave. I'm sorry, Chanyeol, for being such a nuisance
and ruining the evening. I will make it up to you at some point," Baekhyun said, ashamed
about the disheveled way he looked, eyes casted down. And that also marked the end of the
evening when Jiwoo got up as well and they bid their goodbyes, a car waiting outside for
them.

But before Baekhyun could even get into the car, he heard the tall man's voice calling him
again, the white shirt he was wearing now unbuttoned to the first part of his chest, " I...I hope
you will think about the portrait and give me a reply till the end of the week. It would be
wonderful to work together."

And as quick as the city lights were reflecting in his window, his thoughts were running wild,
alcohol and tiredness ruining the possibility of a proper thought. Maybe a drawing of himself
wouldn't be too bad, but what truly was holding him back and what he didn't want to admit
out loud was the chance of being alone with Chanyeol and that weird feeling in his chest to
reappear.
The evening ended quicker than he had wanted it to, knowing it meant a lot to the other artist,
but just the fact that Jiwoo once again treated him like trash, ruined the whole experience.
The booked apartment was dark when they arrived, and he immediately took off his shoes
while his eyes subconsciously gazed towards his fiancé, the one who seemed unbothered by
everything.

Briefly watching the sea and the quietness it was surrounded by, Baekhyun calmed down
from the intense nausea that had climbed up his throat back in the restaurant, doubled by
embarrassment and shame. There was absolutely no way Chanyeol didn't by now realize that
something was wrong about their engagement or at least strange, and he found himself
thinking about the other man once again.

An occurrence that has been happening a lot since they first met.

" Was it necessary to call me out like that, Jiwoo?"

" Why? He is just a customer of mine, it's not like it would matter, right?" He said, disinterest
evident in the way he talked and acted, his lips soon holding the slender roundness of a
cigarette. Something that sent a wave of new disgust throughout the smaller’s body.

" You're an asshole, and you always will be one."

Trying to escape the thick tension and the deathly smell of smoke, he stopped when he saw
Jiwoo walking closer, his eyes telling a story he wasn't able to read this time. He actually
always was horrible to read, the only thing certain being that he was nothing more than
unnecessary baggage in Baekhyun's life, " He asked me if he could draw a portrait of you.
Just agree, will you? It's a good opportunity for publicity."

His words only repeated the one thing he feared at the moment, the possibility of spending
even more time with Chanyeol and probably worsening that feeling in his chest. The one
which made his fingers all tingly and his heart race. He didn't like feeling like that after being
used to the sad hollowness that continued to threaten to take over his body over the years. On
the other hand, though, the comforting wave that always crashed against his created rock of
insecurities, was so tender and warm. Something he indeed didn't feel in years.

" I will think about it, Jiwoo. Three months is a long time, enough for him to paint me. Don't
you think so? No need to rush this like you always do."

He wanted his words to be the last thing shared between them and that ultimately made him
turn his back and leave the room, just thirsting for the comfort of his bed and the sounds of
the waves. This being a thing he started to love more than the constant traffic outside his
window back in Seoul. The grey clouds are almost forgotten in comparison to the endless
blue skies.

__________________

The first week on that island passed by without them meeting again, four whole days in
which Baekhyun wrote down everything that sparked his creativity. Often time leading to
brown eyes and a charming smile, which left him flustered and confused. Chanyeol did
something to him, he opened up the parts he was trying so hard to hide, and he, honestly, did
not know if he liked or hated that. They've only known each other for a week, no one could
have such a fast and heavy impact, right?

It was that one sunny Tuesday when he chose to go outside and buy peaches, only wearing
jeans and a red blouse this time, when he saw Chanyeol.

Chanyeol, who was sitting on the street in a shirt full of paint splotches, hair in a messy bun
and hands covered in chalk. There were children sitting around him and drawing whatever
came to their mind onto the beton, but Baekhyun couldn't tear his eyes away from the man.
The gentle energy and true happiness he radiated was so strong and intense, pulling him in
almost subconsciously.

It wasn't until he was standing beside him and their eyes met, that he realized he had walked
over, cheeks flushing a beautiful red, one that made the taller be mesmerized for the
umpteenth time, " Long time no see, Baekhyun. How have you been?"

It was as if he was unable to reply, only now noticing how he had been acting, hands shaking
due to the nervousness and fisting the material of his blouse, not caring about wrinkles. There
were no cars passing by, and he momentarily let his eyes rake over the drawings on the street,
seeing a big dog and a lot of crazy shaped flowers, beautiful in their own way.

" Hello. Um, I have been good, thank you for asking. I didn't think I would meet you here,
though. What are you painting?" He asked, curiosity leading him to push back his brown
locks so he would be able to properly look at the drawings once more. And it really was
beautiful, while all of the kids gave him a little wave of their hands, one he returned quietly.

" That is good to hear. I have a date with the children of our kindergarten. Once every two
weeks, we draw something together. Today, it's the streets, " Chanyeol explained, eyes briefly
looking at his wristwatch only to stand up and clap his hands together, laughing when he saw
that Baekhyun had slightly jumped due to the noise, " That's it for today kids! Go pack up
everything you took with you, and we will see each other in two weeks."

There was loud groaning and disappointment and for the first time in forever Baekhyun
smiled, but it disappeared as quickly as it had appeared, leading the taller to think it was a
fever dream. One he would love to experience once again. Instead of giving in, the younger
one noticed the chalk over Chanyeol's stubble, slowly moving his hand up to point at it, "
You've got it everywhere on your face."

He looked absolutely endearing actually, with blue and pink on his cheeks, his appearance
seemingly did not matter to the tall man and that ultimately made Baekhyun stare down at
himself and his perfectly styled blouse, just like the jeans and polished shoes. It made him
wonder, had there ever been a moment in his life where he got dirty and didn't care?

" Oh, I probably smeared it on my face subconsciously, " Chanyeol replied with an awful
attempt of rubbing his also colored fingers along his face, trying to purposely make the
smaller smile again, but he realized that was harder than it seemed.
Reaching for the satin tissue he carried around with himself, Baekhyun handed it over while
his soft fingers slid over the fabric one last time, knowing it was in good hands. Literally. The
children were leaving one by one now until they all walked up the long streets towards the
kindergarten, which the smaller had noticed a few times already, the two of them suddenly all
alone on the alley way.

Staring at the other while he cleaned his face, he knew it was obvious and he also noticed
Chanyeol's eyes meeting his own every few seconds, but it wasn't uncomfortable, no, rather
than that it was nice to be in the company of someone that didn't seem to judge him and he
knew the thing he had stuck in his head for several days now, wanted to be spoken into
existence.

" It is actually nice that I met you here because I wanted to answer your question from the
other day."

" Oh, about the portrait?" The older artist asked, hands now rubbing over the silky fabric to
remove most of the chalk he had on them. There always had been the slightest spark of hope
for a positive reply, fully knowing that Baekhyun was extremely distant and seemed shy. But
every person had a story to tell and Chanyeol couldn't demolish the fact that he was heavily
intrigued by the smaller's.

" Yes, about that...I would allow you to draw me. I mean, it would be okay with me, but I still
don't know if I am a suited candidate. I don't have experience with paintings."

Eyes briefly found the view of the ocean in the distance, the calmness of it and the slight
breeze ruined his perfect hair, but it felt good. Baekhyun knew he had eyes on him, he knew
the older man was gazing at his face and he absolutely hated that such a small act turned his
cheeks to a rosy red color.

" To be honest, you are very distant, Baekhyun. Which is not a bad thing at all, but it's harder
to work with someone who is uncomfortable or stiff than with someone who can relax. "

Those words cut quite deep, he had to admit that to himself and he also knew exactly what
the other meant, only showing how transparent he actually seemed to be. Maybe he was
embarrassed about that or worse, ashamed but there was no bite behind his words, no
judgement. Totally different from the way Jiwoo acted around him and that made him agree.

" So you agree that I am not suitable?"

" Yes and no. You are more than suitable, trust me, but you are not comfortable enough which
is why I want to suggest something," Chanyeol replied, while folding the small tissue and
keeping in mind that he had to wash it before returning it, actually debating how to do that
properly without ruining the fabric.

" What would that be?"

Head crooked the slightest towards his shoulder, Baekhyun didn't even realize how cute he
looked in the other's eyes, his behavior almost childlike while they talked about a serious
topic. There was the small grocery store at the corner and also the peaches he definitely
wanted to buy, but right now his attention was on the other.

" How about we get to know each other better? I think that would help you immensely, and
then, we can still see if it works or not?"

His idea was justified, and Baekhyun was momentarily thrilled at the prospect of spending
time with the artist, but he was also intimidated, knowing he would, sooner or later, show a
side of himself he tried to hide for ages. And that probably without even noticing.

" Okay that sounds good actually. What do you suggest for the start?" He asked, head
nodding twice before he crossed his arms over his chest in order to hide his body, out of habit
though and definitely not because of the other man in front of him.

" How about fresh peach iced tea and a studio tour?"

Baekhyun had expected anything when it came to the prospect of Chanyeol's apartment, but
what indeed greeted him was beautiful. His small house was situated on top of the cliffs,
exactly the opposite direction of their rented apartment, the view over the ocean even more
mesmerizing. It was an old building, but it had its charms especially when it came to the art
room he was introduced to.

Paintings were standing and hanging everywhere with a terrace looking over the ocean. The
sunlight shown through the long white curtains, and Baekhyun swore he had never felt more
comfortable than in that moment. Chanyeol was standing behind him, a bag of peaches in
between his hands while he smiled, amused at the way the smaller acted.

" This is really inspiring, Chanyeol. It's beautiful. You draw everything in this room?"

" Except the big ones you saw in the gallery. Those I draw outside at the beach. It calms me
down," he admitted, briefly waving his hand for Baekhyun to follow before they both walked
into the tall man's kitchen. It was clean and tidy, a table in the middle of the room with a box
of fruits, while there was a tea kettle on the stove. Chanyeol set the bag with peaches down
on the counter, one of them rolling out and dropping onto the floor towards the smaller,
stopping only when it hit his shoe.

It left him to reach down and pick it up, the sheer size of it covering both of his tiny hands
while he rubbed the bumpy surface, nervousness still present even if he tried to not show it
on the outside, " I really like your apartment. It's so spacious and yet not too big."

Walking closer to place the peach back to where it had rolled away from, he watched
Chanyeol reach for a pot and sugar, his big hands acting so gently yet focused. And it took
him a whole second to realize that this wouldn't be needed for iced tea, " What are you
doing?"

" I will make the peach iced tea for us, I think that will quite fit your taste, and it's something
I am used to making so I won't ruin it," Chanyeol explained and something about the dryness
of his words and the joke hiding behind them just made Baekhyun grin briefly, the mix of
both lightening his overall gloomy presence.
" I see. Well, I can't speak for your talent to cook and make drinks, but I, for myself, am
terrible. I, sadly enough, can't cook at all. Rice is the only thing I don't ruin."

Logically speaking, he would have never admitted that to just anyone, his pride and role in
society way too important to ruin it with small useless facts like those, but in the presence of
the taller, it just felt right to be the way he wanted to and not the one he was playing for the
eyes of many. While thinking about that, he also followed the other's hands and the way they
reached for a knife and a little cutting board, fingers twitching to help, " Can I do something
as well?"

" You can cut the peaches into thin slices, okay? Also only rice? Is that the reason your fiancé
is so well built?" Chanyeol joked while handing both the knife and board over to the smaller,
noticing the slight emptiness that moved over his beautiful brown eyes, and he wondered if
he just completely messed up, or if it was something different that had crossed his busy head.

And it also took Baekhyun all of his confidence and trust to not laugh along and instead spill
the truth, somehow just knowing that the artist wouldn't judge or talk about it in town.

" We don't eat together, Chanyeol. He often comes back home when I'm already fast asleep,"
he replied, slowly and carefully slicing the big peaches he had unpacked, while seeing the
water heating up on the stove, steam covering the small kitchen.

" Oh, but isn't that terribly lonely?"

Maybe the question was not suited for the situation and more so, not respecting their purely
business relationship, but something inside the taller's heart yearned for wanting to be there
for Baekhyun, to at least help him relax his mind and body, because it was quite clear that he
always seemed tense and nervous, " I am sorry if I crossed any boundaries with th-"

" It's okay," Baekhyun interrupted him, seeing the surprise in his doe eyes and actually
holding back his adoration for them. This was roughly the fourth time they had met and
talked and yet, the younger man felt like he could tell him the truth. It wasn't as if it was a
secret no one was supposed to know, but Jiwoo needed this perfect attire of their relationship,
this spark of jealousy he loved to erupt in other people's bodies.

However, due to the situation at the restaurant and their rented apartment, Baekhyun knew
that Chanyeol probably started to be the least bit suspicious, his behavior telling more than a
thousand words. And honestly speaking, the smaller found that quite endearing, " I am sure
you noticed, but our engagement is not like others."

" Well, it is not my intention to dig deeper and reveal your secrets, Baekhyun, but yes. I
noticed that you don't seem as happy as you deserve to be."

A part of Baekhyun just wanted to cry at the softness he seemed to hold for a mere stranger, a
business partner's soon to be husband, but he composed himself and instead stopped cutting
the peaches, eyes momentarily gazing out of the window, before he met those of Chanyeol, "
You wanted us to get to know each other better, right? Maybe at one point I will be able to
tell you, but for now, you should really tell me if I am cutting those peaches the right way."
There was a certain amount of fun in his words, one which he purposely voiced out because
he felt so at peace in that tiny kitchen, having the ocean right outside the window and
someone like Chanyeol standing beside him, making him feel welcomed and good. And it
made him more than happy to know that the older man laughed because of him, one of his
big warm hands finding the knife to carefully cut a thinner slice than Baekhyun's, their
fingers touching only briefly.

" Do it like that. That way they will fit better into the pot."

Baekhyun would have lied if the simple touch of the other's rough fingers didn't make his
skin turn warm, a feeling he wasn't used to, rushing through the length of his veins right up to
his heart to make it beat a tad bit faster. But he knew how to compose himself, and he also
knew Chanyeol was quite smart, so instead of wanting him to notice, he nodded his head and
continued to stare at the board, lips caught between his sharp teeth.

" Okay, I got it! But what do we need to do next?"

" We need to brew black tea and cook the peaches, I will leave it up to you. What do you
want to do next?" Chanyeol spoke up, eyeing the smaller and his nervous antics, which made
him so adorable. He noticed that he seemed affected by their shared touch, and he would
have lied if he said he didn't enjoy the softness of Baekhyun's skin. But he also knew, he had
no right to think like that, and right now, it wasn't the best moment for anything of that sort.

" Then I will do the tea! I just need to brew it the way I am supposed to, right? Hot water and
then mixing the herbs?"

Waiting for a nod from the taller, he hummed in satisfaction when he agreed, hand reaching
out for the kettle to fill it up and place it back on the stove, their bodies now closer than ever
due to them standing right beside each other. That way, though, Baekhyun was able to watch
the older man stir the peaches and add sugar, the sweet smell filling up the room and invading
his nostrils like a drug.

Something about the situation was surreal as well, simply because Baekhyun didn't do things
like this. He never did. But now that he got a taste of having fun, he wanted to feel it for a bit
longer. And as if he wasn't distracted enough already, he didn't even notice he had been
staring. Only when the kettle screamed like a nearing train, did he blink his eyes and turn the
stove off, hands tingly from the idiocy that ran through his body.

" It's done, Baekhyun. Can you move it over here and pour it into the huge glass bottle? We
will have to wait for it to cool down," Chanyeol softly ordered, he himself having turned off
the stove with the peaches to let them set as well. Making sure that the younger man wouldn't
burn himself, he stared at him and only stopped when the tea was transferred, body now
leaning against the counter, arms crossed.

" So, we have to wait now?"

" Exactly. Do you want to go out and sit on the terrace with me? I have some snacks we can
eat."
-

Maybe there had been instances where he had felt comfortable in his life way before this,
where he felt like he could fall asleep and wake up wrapped in warm blanket, but it was quite
difficult to remember them when he was currently being warmed up by the sun, hand holding
some peanuts which were covered in paprika powder.

Chanyeol was sitting on the other side of the tiny table between them, arms behind his head
while his eyes were closed and the smaller hated himself for letting his eyes wander over the
whole expanse of his arms, the golden teint of his skin so beautiful that he just couldn't rip his
eyes away. Simultaneously though, he sensed that he was not as smart as he should have been
because the moment the other turned towards him, he flinched, peanuts falling through the
wood down onto the cliffs.

" Did I scare you?" He snorted, amused at Baekhyun's flustered state and the red powder all
over his hands, seeing that he struggled with moving them normally. Luckily, he still had the
tissue in his back pocket, pulling it out to gently touch the smaller's slender hands and rub
over his palms, removing it as best as possible, " This is quite unsightly for someone as
extravagant as you, isn't it? Let me help you."

He knew he was being made fun off, and he knew he really was this perfect and untouchable
person and yet, he let Chanyeol touch him and clean him up, lips trembling from the need to
just smile so brightly because he was happy, really seriously happy. But he didn't want to
drag down his walls, instead just humming and looking at his hands after the other was done.

"Thank you very much, I usually don't eat this messy, I don't know what went through my
head."

There was an understanding smile on the older man's face, one that told him everything was
fine, and he actually enjoyed it way too much when he could still feel the warmth his fingers
had left on his palms, tissue now full of chalk and paprika. That was the same moment they
got up as well to go back to the kitchen, tea having cooled down by now.

" Okay, now let me show you the real magic of making iced tea."

Reaching for two big glasses, Chanyeol filled them both with ice cubes and poured the peach
juice into it as well, adding the slices for aesthetic purposes. Only to finish it up with the
black tea and two wooden straws, making Baekhyun thank him for offering the glass and
taking a small sip. What he had thought would be either too bitter or too sweet, was the
perfect mix between those two, and it set his taste buds alive, eyes growing in size and
momentarily forgetting his stoic attitude to smile, " This is so good, Chanyeol. I love it."

" Hm, I'm glad you do. I can make it for you again some time."

" That would be nice," Baekhyun replied, most definitely melting at the deep voice and yet
soft meaning of his words, friendly attitude making him feel so welcomed. Overall, this day
seemed to turn to his favorite one ever since they had landed days ago. The sun decided to set
lower and made him realize how much time actually had passed by.
5 hours.

It also reminded him that he didn't tell Jiwoo where he had gone, not that it would have
mattered anyway, but he definitely didn't want to end the day with an unnecessary argument.
Finishing his drink, his hand stroked along the surface of the counter while his eyes found
Chanyeol's, but this time he caught him staring, and it made both their cheeks turn a light red.

While it should have been awkward or embarrassing, it wasn't even close to any of those
emotions.

" It was really nice of you to take me here, Chanyeol. I think this will help me to be more
comfortable, but I need to leave now, it's getting late."

" I thought so already. Should I bring you back to your apartment?" Chanyeol asked, being
the gentleman he painted himself out to be and making Baekhyun feel so comforted and
cared about, head subconsciously nodding to reply to his question because if it meant they
could talk for a bit longer, he would not let it slide.

Now that the sun started to disappear behind the tons of water that covered the earth, the
younger man regretted not having taken a jacket with himself, slightly shivering the more
shadows fell upon him. Chanyeol noticed that, but he knew there was not much he could do,
not when they were arriving at the apartment and Jiwoo was already at the door.

" There you are. And Chanyeol as well."

" Good evening, Mr. Kim."

Tension was only between Jiwoo and Baekhyun himself, their eyes meeting in a way of
confusion and disinterest, but the smaller knew Chanyeol would pick it up quite fast, hand
gently touching his shoulder before biding his goodbye, " Thank you for walking me home."

" Anytime. I guess we will see each other soon then."

Watching the taller leave, he walked up the stairs and pushed past his fiancé, not in the mood
for talking, as if he ever had been once since they knew each other. Instead of that, he took
off his shoes as well as his wristwatch, ready to just order dinner and go to his room when he
noticed the other's eyes on him.

" Say what you want to say. "

" Did you meet up with him for the portrait? You know he is a great artist, it would be good
publicity if you did."

There was not even the slightest care about what Baekhyun wanted, even if he was okay with
the drawing, and it made him feel just as disgusted as always, eyes rolling to the back of his
head and he decided to briefly turn around, nodding his head.

" I did, and I will let him draw me. I would appreciate it if you stop annoying me for today."
And without giving him a chance of replying, he left, knowing there wouldn't have been stuff
to talk about anyway.

-----------------

" You dressed up quite nicely for a mere meeting."

As if living in the same apartment and breathing the same air as Jiwoo, wasn't already
enough, he also was forced to listen to his constant comments and unnecessary statements.
The morning actually had started pretty well, the weather was amazing and his mood also
seemed to be lighter than the last few weeks, fully knowing it was because of the day he had
spent together with Chanyeol.

Not ultimately because of the man himself, but simply because he had been able to relax and
not worry about the constant eyes on him as well as the need to be perfect. The artist seemed
to be the first person in his life, who did not care about appearance or behaviour and that led
to a really good rest in his way too big bed. And maybe, just maybe he wanted to look pretty
and feel pretty, which is why he had put on some more makeup than usually. Just around the
eyes.

But of course the other had to notice, he always did.

" And? What is bad about that? It's not like I never did that before, I am always top notch."

" Snappy."

Rolling his eyes and just praying for the taller one to disappear from his eyesight, Baekhyun
was glad when his phone rang, indicating the meeting of the day. Most of the time, he didn't
participate in them, only the important ones because during those Jiwoo had the chance to
display what he owned. It was bothersome, but nothing he wasn't used to, and at least now, he
seemed to have a distraction worth their time spent in Italy.

Dressed in a black shirt and equally as black loose pants, he did not wear business shoes for
the first time in forever and instead chose sandals, those in which he would definitely feel the
sand, if they decided to go to the beach. Honestly speaking, he did not really care what they
would do, he was just relieved to be able to escape the suffocating air of their rented
apartment.

Deciding to walk the distance to the other's house, he memorized the route quite well, and he
actually was surprised about it because usually he drove by car. Being able to breathe the
fresh air and greet the random people on the street was the difference he had been craving.
Even though they had not decided on a certain time to meet up, Baekhyun felt like it would
be okay to just go to his house, nothing in his head being able to prepare him for the way he
would be feeling in just a few seconds.

Because what he saw in front of Chanyeol's apartment, was a beautiful young woman, hair as
black as the night, lips covered in a mesmerizing red and the smile she was carrying around
seemed so loving. The artist on the other hand was leaning against his door frame, arms as
muscular as ever while they were crossed over his chest, hair not in a bun this time but falling
across his shoulders.

They seemed engaged in their conversation, and Baekhyun had no clue what to do with his
hands, moving them nervously against each other. Something about the situation did not sit
well with him, and he hated that he actually was able to produce such strong feelings.
Knowing he would be noticed sooner or later, he took all of his confidence together and
walked closer, his and Chanyeol's eyes immediately meeting and the older simply just had to
stare at the beauty of the smaller man.

" Baekhyun, hi. You're early."

" I'm sorry, I-I didn't mean to interrupt," he apologized and finally dared to look at the
woman, who was now standing beside him. Almost the same height and such nice features,
beautiful indeed and he couldn't avoid feeling slightly intimidated, " Hello, it is nice to meet
you, I'm Baekhyun."

" It is nice to meet you too, and you did not interrupt. I was about to leave anyway," she
replied, voice like honey and all those good things while the wind stroked her defined
cheekbones, " I am Seulgi by the way, the tall guy here is my best friend and I heard you have
a meeting today? So I baked some cookies and brought them over."

It was terribly obvious how relieved he was about hearing the word friend, the harsh
squeezing in his chest stopping once more only to make room for embarrassment. He wrote
about situations like that in books, but experiencing them first hand was way worse. Brushing
a hand through his brown locks, he noticed Chanyeol's gaze on him, and it made him
unbelievably shy, glad when the taller decided to break the silence.

" Thanks again for the food and we will see each other soon, don't forget about the special
event at the gallery!" Chanyeol spoke up, almost shushing Seulgi away while his eyes never
left Baekhyun, gazing at his rosy cheeks and manicured nails. He was even prettier than
usual, if he was allowed to think that and it threw him overboard just thinking about the effort
he probably put in only for their meeting, " Come inside Baekhyun, I want to show you
something."

Just like the day before, the comforting air in the room was amazing, the light of the sun
filtering through the white curtains and reflecting on the furniture as well as the painting right
in front of them and that definitely caught Baekhyun's attention the most, " Oh, a portrait?"

" I wanted to show you how I usually draw them, so you have an overview of things as well
as the possibility of getting used to this," Chanyeol explained, while putting the cookies, his
friend had brought, into a bowl on the kitchen table. He knew Baekhyun probably was still
nervous about everything, and he sincerely hoped this would ease it. Even if it was just for a
while.

" That is very considerate of you, it is beautiful by the way, the portrait. Who does it show?"
" My Mom..."

Noticing the slight undertone in the taller's voice, Baekhyun finally decided to look at him,
only to notice the brief sadness, and he felt bad for asking in the first place. Of course, he
couldn't have known, but he did not like that expression on the artist's face, his eyebrows
furrowed so sternly that it ruined his handsome face and he had the desire to rub it away with
one of his cold thumbs. Something he wouldn't have dared to do, " I'm sorry, was that an
uncomfortable question?"

Watching Chanyeol shake his head softly, before tying his hair up in a bun, he subconsciously
bit his lips, knowing it was completely out of place in the current situation, but he could not
suppress the desire to rake his fingers through those soft strands, throat bopping once to
swallow down his needs, " No, please don't worry. It's just, I miss her. She is not gone, I'm
sorry if it sounded like that, she is just out of reach for me, overseas in Korea.”

Nodding in understanding, Baekhyun reached out to take a cookie from the bowl, slender
fingers breaking it into two pieces before he bit into it and he knew the he had crumbs on his
mouth, but for the first time in forever he did not care about his appearance, " I can
understand that. My relationship with my parents in general is not good, but I want to thank
you for showing me the painting. I really am intrigued to see how I will turn out to look like."

" Beautiful."

" Huh?" the smaller gasped, hand dropping the food, he was holding, to the wooden floor
because, did he hear that correctly? He knew many people saw him as someone who was
beautiful and he constantly heard it at events as well, but this, this was completely different.
It made his heart skip a way he never would have expected, crave something he wasn't
allowed to and he just knew his cheeks were a crimson red and Chanyeol enjoyed being able
to get such a reaction from the smaller because he was true to his words.

" You heard that right. It will look beautiful because you are. As an artist I noticed the
potential almost immediately, you really are a beautiful person, Baekhyun. I hope you know
that," he answered nonchalantly even though he knew it made the other all flustered and shy,
but he liked teasing him way too much.

Hearing those words, the brown haired man closed and opened his mouth several times like a
fish, before deciding to reach for the cookie on the floor, enough time to calm down from the
sudden heat that ran up and down his spine, terribly strong at that. Compliments always left
him cold, this one made him want to scream in ecstasy.

" I… Thank you for saying that, it's really nice of you," he replied, knowing it was a weak
response, but he just didn't know how to react or behave, eyes shifting up and down
Chanyeol's body, not fixed on one spot. On top of that he could hear the taller's laughter and
he also saw him chuckling into his fist while he walked back towards the counter, teasing
undertone obvious, but he wasn't even capable of being angry.

" Anyway, the thing I want to make with you today is pasta. Do you like that?"
Hand touching his cheeks in order to feel if they were just as hot as he thought they were, he
nodded his head, being a huge fan of the dish and overall noodles. Easy dinner and enough to
fill his stomach most of the time. What surprised him, though, were the ingredients on the
counter, starting with flour and ending with eggs.

" Oh, from scratch?"

" Exactly. It is fun, we make dinner for ourselves, and we can talk that way as well."

Briefly smiling at his words, the smaller honestly was excited even though he knew his
cooking skills were, let's say, horrible. The fact that he had told Chanyeol that and he
suggested trying this together now, weirdly enough. made him feel cared about.

" Good thing I told you that I can only cook rice. You need to be my teacher for today."

And even if he did not intend his words to sound as daring as they turned out to be, he didn't
regret it because for the first time since they met each other, Chanyeol was the one flustered,
awkwardly clearing his throat. He knew better than to dig deeper and continue the little
teasing he was capable of, instead moving his head to the side to stare at the taller
endearingly, "What do we need to do first?"

It wasn't as if Chanyeol never had been flirted with, but Baekhyun did it subconsciously and
that made it way worse, affecting him and the not allowed skipping of his heart, the sound
within his ribcage being so loud and terrifying. But he knew he had to calm down and he did
when his eyes fell on the other's hand, the silver ring plain yet heavy when it came to
meaning.

" Okay so, first we need to make a little mountain with the flour we have. Watch this," he
smiled, gently and carefully pouring the dry whiteness onto the surface of his counter, his big
rough hands keeping it together so it wouldn't get messy. There was this brief spark he felt
when he saw Baekhyun stroking his hair out of his face, the shimmery eyeshadow making his
eyes look almost sensual and it led him to gently pull him by his wrist, not thinking about the
consequences.

They ended up with the smaller in between Chanyeol's arms, the warmth he provided
spreading all over Baekhyun's body without them touching. It was weird because they simply
were trying to make pasta, but the situation just screamed for something way more domestic,
and it made him terribly nervous, hands grabbing the counter for leverage, " Okay, what
now? "

" Now you grab the eggs and crack them carefully into the middle of the flour."

Feeling the taller's breath ghost against his cheek, everytime he moved his lips to speak,
Baekhyun held the shudder back, which wanted to rake through his body. One that would
have been too obvious and especially expose what he actually felt like. It was no secret by
now that he indeed felt attracted to the other, the comfort indescribable even if only some
days had passed by. They both knew it, and they also both felt the small spark.
Which is why he enjoyed this situation way too much, feeling small within strong arms while
he cracked the eggs carefully in between his thin fingers. It actually was a lot of fun, and it
probably was obvious in the way he acted, eyes glistening with childish needs.

" I cracked the eggs, what's next?"

Watching the artist move away to stand beside him, Baekhyun gasped so so quietly that he
didn't even realize it himself because from one second to the other, the taller had laid his
hands on top of the smaller's, touch so warm and comforting that he felt the blush creeping up
his glowing cheeks once more and he didn't seem to plan to let go of them anytime soon.

" Now you mix and knead the dough. Do you think you can do that?"

" I do think I can, it's not like I am afraid of messy hands," he replied, daring to be the least
bit cheeky, and it honestly felt like years the last time he acted like that. If he had been scared
of what people would have thought or if they would have judged him, he now was more than
comfortable with acting how he actually wanted to. Chanyeol's tender gaze telling him he
was okay with that.

Feeling the slight breeze push through the small opening of the kitchen window, he wriggled
his nose when a loose strand fell into his face, hand subconsciously moving up to move it
back behind his ear, oblivious to the way the flour was now stroked along his cheek. It looked
cute in the older's eyes and that was the main reason he didn't say anything.

Baekhyun, on the other hand, was now fully motivated to show that he wouldn't ruin this easy
task, hands kneading through the dough while his ring was now laying on the counter and he
had to admit, the heavy weight was gone for now. It was just a symbol after all, one that
caged him in, but it held a meaning he never had agreed to.

" Okay, great chef Chanyeol, what do you think about this?"

Pointing at the now well mixed dough, hands fully covered in bits of it as well as flour, he
stared hopefully, knowing Chanyeol would never be mean. And it proved to be right when
the taller touched the mixture and hummed under his breath, eyes soon finding Baekhyun's, "
It's perfect and it seems you are quite the ambiguous worker, you have flour all over your
face."

" Huh? And you didn't mean to tell me this earlier?" Baekhyun gasped, not angry or sad, but
rather amused, knowing what he had in his head was ridiculous and probably childish, but he
still decided to risk it by grabbing flour and throwing it at the other. It was instantly flying
around the room, white powder everywhere and then the artist's face came into view, nose
covered as well as his lips.

It was as if every locked emotion inside of him hung on a wire, one that snapped the second
he saw Chanyeol's face and it just bursted out of him, the highest most beautiful laugh the
taller had ever heard. But not only that, Baekhyun genuinely seemed to let go and relax, and
he knew he was part of the reason he allowed himself too. As if almost automatically, he
reached for the flour with one hand and threw it at the smaller as well, catching him off guard
but soon leading to a messy fight within white fog.
There was giggling, maybe also some tears from the amount of grinning they both did, but
most importantly, comfort. One that found Baekhyun when he least expected it, stumbling
like a nervous high school kid and bumping into Chanyeol's chest, flour fogging his view.
Only seconds passed by in which he looked up, met his eyes and stopped smiling, instead
staring into his brown dark eyes and getting lost in the depth they provided.

" You have it everywhere, Baekhyun," the taller chuckled, fingers subconsciously reaching
out to gently stroke the powder away from the smaller's cheeks, intimacy hidden in the way
he acted before he realized it and pulled back, watching the other do the same.

" I..." Baekhyun started, glad the little fog they created was able to hide his red cheeks,
ashamed of his own thoughts because there was nothing he would have liked more than to
bury his face in the other's chest, hugging him to his heart's content. But, the moment he
noticed the other's eyes on the ring laying on the counter, it was like an ice cold shower
rushing down on him, reality way uglier than he wanted it to be.

In those seconds that passed by, which felt like minutes, he knew he wanted to tell Chanyeol
more about himself, he knew he wanted him to know the truth to some extent, but the
moment he realized why he wanted that, his ears joined the crimson red of his face. There
was this interest and attraction, something he still couldn't pinpoint, but he decided to offer
the first big insight.

" You keep staring at my ring."

" I'm sorry, I didn't mean to tou-"

" Let me tell you something," Baekhyun interrupted, reaching for the cold silver. It didn't
evoke any deep or intense emotions in his chest, instead dragging his mood down to a point
he felt like spilling everything. Yet, the day was beautiful, the sun was shining onto the ocean
and nothing could have made him want to ruin that, " This ring, it does not hold any meaning,
Chanyeol. I think you know that already, though. "

" I had a guess..."

Nodding at his words, he put it back on and leaned against the counter, fingers carefully
stroking over his cheeks to remove the flour. It was just a distraction for his hammering heart,
though, knowing he had never talked to someone about this before. No friends or family
members, a secret that he so badly wanted to share to at least feel the slightest bit better.

" My parents and Jiwoo's are good friends, business wise. That is actually the whole ground
of our engagement as well. Nothing more than work."

It felt good, but simultaneously, so wrong to tell a random stranger, someone he felt a pull
towards, things he promised to never talk about, but something inside of him wanted to
destroy the perfect image of their relationship, to show how it actually really was. He knew
Chanyeol and Jiwoo were business partner's as well, but he also knew this was a safe space.
The other was one.
For Chanyeol, it indeed wasn't as surprising as he had thought, having wondered just how
their relationship actually was like when he saw nothing even close to love between them. He
wasn't dumb or blind, noticing just how secretive and depressed Baekhyun actually seemed to
be and maybe, just maybe, that had been the main reason for wanting to make him smile.

" I won't tell anyone, if you worry about that."

" Oh, Chanyeol, I told you because I know you won't. It's okay. It seemed like you felt bad
about touching my face, I just wanted you to know that it was okay to do so."

Offering him a genuine smile, one he didn't use in ages, he took a deep breath and sighed,
chest lighter now that he finally could act true to his feelings, soon pointing at the dough, "
Let's finish the pasta! I'm getting quite hungry."

Instead of sitting outside on the terrace this time, they were at the table in the kitchen, the
smell of the food filling up the room while they waited for it to cool down a little. Baekhyun
sat on the opposite of the other, that way being able to stare at him and watch him sip on the
glass of iced tea he had prepared beforehand.

It was calm, but for the younger, it still was slightly uncomfortable, now that he more or less
spilled part of the truth. He knew Chanyeol and Jiwoo had known each other longer, and he
sincerely didn't plan to ruin anything, but a small part of his brain wanted to monopolize the
other.

" Say, now that I told you something, well, quite private, will you tell me how you met
Jiwoo?"

Piercing his fork through the spinach to pick it up, he was nibbling on it rather than eating
and the taller involuntary followed the motion with his soft orbs, the brown haired man
looking so ethereal with the weak sunlight shining onto his unblemished skin.

" Actually, we met in Seoul at an art gallery before I decided to move to Italy. He saw some
of my works, and he immediately wanted to sponsor me. I thought about it for some time and
ultimately agreed. Ever since then we stayed in contact over mail," he explained, no longer
sure what to think about Jiwoo and his behavior towards Baekhyun, definitely not liking how
he often intended to degrade him.

" I see, he has a good eye for artists."

Baekhyun smiled while saying that, hiding the compliment within his words while their eyes
met for the tenth time that day, teeth scraping along the fork before he reached for the glass of
iced tea. There were water droplets running down the outside of it, and it felt good against his
palm, cooling him down from the excited mood he was currently in.

" Was that meant to be a compliment?" Chanyeol asked, playfully at that before noticing how
relaxed the other actually seemed to be. Smile not leaving his petal shaped lips while he
shrugged his delicate shoulders, the drink in his hands half empty. There was something
calming about the situation, and it was most probably the first time in a while for Baekhyun
to be this comfortable and happy. Truly happy.

" Maybe."

" Will we meet tomorrow as well?"

There was hope in his voice while Baekhyun stood at the door, Chanyeol leaning against the
doorframe in all his blending glory. His arms were crossed over his chest, squeezing the
muscles a tad bit more, a movement that happened subconsciously, yet the smaller couldn't
stop staring.

" I'm sorry, but the rest of the week, I don't have time. We are preparing for an event at the
kindergarten, so the next meeting will be on Monday. Is that okay?"

Trying not to display the disappointment he actually felt in that second, the smaller rubbed
his hands together in an attempt to hide his true feelings, taken aback that they were so
intense. The pull he had felt during their first meeting was growing stronger, forcing him to
not know how to act with the things inside his heart. And Chanyeol? He noticed the glimmer
in his eyes dying down, feeling bad for refusing his wish.

One he actually had as well, knowing there was something between them. Something really
special and dangerous.

" I see, it is completely fine. Should I come meet you here as well?"

" Not this time. I want to take you out to town, that would be towards the evening, though.
We can meet at the small grocery store. Would that cause trouble?" He proposed, fully
knowing that he was asking for too much, not caring about the outcome.

It made Baekhyun genuinely smile, one he definitely only showed to the older man because
he trusted him. As weird as it sounded, after only a week of knowing each other, the taller
made him feel safe, and he didn't want to let go of that sensation. Stroking a strand of hair
behind his ear, he chose to overlook the obvious problem with Jiwoo, and instead, nodded his
head, feet feeling so high on clouds that he started to think he wasn't standing on a street.

" Don't worry. I will be there then, at around seven. Have a nice evening, Chanyeol."

Turning around and starting to walk back to his own rented apartment, he knew the other was
staring at him, and he loved it. He fully enjoyed it, mind flooded with the memory of
Chanyeol's fingers stroking over his cheeks. It was sweet torture actually, the fear of this
being a goddamn mistake, huge, but on the other hand, his life couldn't be more miserable
than it already was, making him bite his lips.

The house was dark, no lights on or any sign of his fiancé being home, and it made him feel
so comfortable and happy. Knowing it would be hard to hide the fact that he was sincerely
glowing from the amount of endorphins he had experienced today. That was until he noticed
the terrace door being open, smoke invading his nostrils only to see the taller on his phone,
leaning against the railing.

" Jiwoo, I'm back."

Watching him end the call and pressing his cigarette into the ashtray, the other walked back
inside and briefly acknowledged his presence, eyeing Baekhyun up and down only to stop his
gaze at his face, " You seem calm. Is being painted that much fun?"

Holding back the words he would have loved to display, the smaller instead took his shoes off
to place them beside the door, back turned towards the other man, " He didn't start just yet.
I'm not comfortable enough at the moment, and I appreciate that he is patient with me."

" So you go on dates with him?"

Gasping loudly and obviously irritated, he wondered for a second why Jiwoo seemed so
invested, but he found back to the only reason he knew was possible.

Professionalism.

Everything, that threatened their perfect engagement, was a thorn in the man's eyes, one that
always was way too close to pierce through his brown irises.

" You're being ridiculous. You want me to be painted for publicity, and now you're judging
me for doing exactly that? It's Chanyeol's way of working, be happy that I didn't blatantly
refuse the offer."

" Okay okay, calm down. My god, you, sometimes, can be so exhausting especially when
showing anger."

" It's not like that would ever matter, you asshole. We're engaged out of pure business needs.
Let me live my life in peace, if I'm already forced to spend it with you."

His words were harsh, he knew that and he also knew he never lashed out like that before, but
something about bad-mouthing Chanyeol and his way of working, ticked him off. But maybe
it was also the guilt for feeling those things for a stranger, instead of for the man he was
supposed to marry. They both knew this was for business and social status, but an
engagement still held power, one Baekhyun always had feared.

" If you're not against it, I will go to my bedroom now."

And that's how he left the situation, anger in his veins uncomfortable and way too hot. There
was also a good feeling bubbling up, though, knowing he would be able to escape this
monotonous disaster of a life pretty soon, making him look forward to seeing Chanyeol
again.

______________
The following days til Monday passed by agonizingly slow, so slow that Baekhyun often
woke up in hopes he would have slept through the week, a ridiculous wish at that. But when
the day finally became reality, he was so nervous and excited. Not having seen the artist for
the rest of last week, he now was craving his presence like crazy. A thrilling and dangerous
thought.

Having seen that Jiwoo had left for a meeting with some local authorities, he had spent half
of the day getting ready, actually making a mess of his closet while searching for something
fitting. The nights were colder, and that's why he now was wearing a soft brown turtleneck
with a pair of loose black dungarees on top. He looked adorable actually, nothing like his
usual cold perfection and the comfort those clothes gave him, reminisced Chanyeol's brief
touch.

For makeup, he chose to only put on concealer for his undereye bags and a little bit of
shining lip gloss, nothing too crazy, just like his brown hair which was not styled and rather, a
soft mess. For shoes, he picked the new converse he had taken with him to Italy, perfect ones
for a day that did not consist of being in the focus of curious eyes.

One glance at the clock on his night stand and he knew he had to leave, only reaching for his
small brown bag before rushing out of the apartment and into the fresh evening air. The
convenience store wasn't far away and he knew he was too early, which led him to sit on the
small brick wall, legs swinging back and forth while he continuously stroked through his hair,
out of nervousness.

That was the exact moment, Chanyeol had found him in the small crowd of people,
Baekhyun looking like art even from a distance, and he felt it in his blood that today would
be different from the days before, excitement making him walk over to where the other sat,
immediately meeting his droopy eyes.

" Did you wait long?"

" No, only a few minutes actually," Baekhyun replied, gaze raking over the other's
appearance and the white shirt he was wearing. It was tight, not that he minded, but it truly
was distracting, especially when he tensed his muscles, " You are quite on time though?"

" Oh, yes, I didn't want to make you wait."

Humming at his words, the smaller carefully got back to the ground after climbing off the
wall, his outfit making him seem way softer than usual in Chanyeol's eyes, and also weirdly
enough, even cuter. If that was possible. The streets were actually filled with people, a lot of
couples holding hands and walking to a loud place up the street, making Baekhyun want to
know what was going on.

" That is where we will go. I want to introduce you to some people."

" Me?"

Not receiving a reply, and instead, watching Chanyeol wave his hand and start walking away,
he caught up quickly, legs not as long as the other's, and ultimately, slowing him down. The
fairy lights on every house they passed by were so romantic and pretty, something he seemed
to adore and Chanyeol noticed his soft gazes, glad he chose to go out instead of staying in.

The closer they got to the loud chatter, the more Baekhyun noticed that there was actually a
street band playing music and wine being handed out in small glasses. It resembled some
kind of festival, and he absolutely loved the fact that the tall artist thought of him while
choosing this activity. Sure, the amount of people intimidated him, made him nervous and the
least bit anxious, but that changed when he realized no one was looking at him or paying
attention. For once.

"Chanyeol, you came!"

Stepping back when a smaller guy ran into the older man's chest and hugged him, Baekhyun
felt the smallest spark of envy, trying his hardest to push it away once more. He had no right
to feel like this, yet he wanted to know what their relationship actually consisted of.

" Soo, of course! I promised it. I also brought someone with m-"

" Oh wait, are you Baekhyun?"

" Huh?" The smaller gasped, eyes big while he pointed at himself, because not only did he
wonder how he knew his name, but also how he overall seemed informed about his presence.
That quickly seemed to make sense though, when he saw Chanyeol's ears growing red and
his hands gesturing for the other man to stop, making him hold back a giggle, " I am. Do we
know each other?"

" Oh, we don't, but I kno-"

" Kyungsoo, let him breathe. Hi, I'm Jongin."

Watching another tall stranger walk over and reach his hand out, Baekhyun shook it gently
albeit confusedly, eyes finding Chanyeol’s briefly before he watched both of the stranger's
share a quick kiss. It was a gentle, reassuring one and it made them giggle, calming the slight
jealousy in his heart immensely but also making him crave for the same, which led him to
clear his throat.

" Baekhyun, those are Kyungsoo and Jongin, good friends of mine and, as you can see, each
other's partner. They are also part of the band that is playing tonight."

"Ah, I see. Then I should say, it is nice to meet you two," he replied, gaze raking over the
amount of people drinking and laughing, before he saw a glass of wine right in front of his
eyes, Kyungsoo offering it to him, " Thank you."

Chanyeol tenderly gazed at the smaller, and he knew his friends were staring at him, making
him shake his head softly so they would shut up. He wanted this evening to be enjoyable for
everyone, no weird questions or pressure and most definitely no stress for Baekhyun. This
date was supposed to make them feel a bit closer, nothing more, nothing less.

" Let's drink something together before you need to perform again."
" Great idea."

He loved wine, red or white, it didn't actually matter. What he didn't expect was that it could
end up making him tispy really fast, the alcohol way stronger than what he was used to, but it
made sense because it was self-brewed and fresh. The people around them were drinking one
shot after another, while Baekhyun was struggling with his third glass, seeing how Chanyeol
seemed to handle it way better.

His friends had gone back to play more songs again, and they were actually really good, their
music rhythmic and fast. Gazing at the few couples that danced, he placed his now empty
glass on the table he was leaning against, hand stroking along the turtle neck to pull it down
because of the sudden rush of warmth wandering through his body.

" Do you like to dance?"

" Hm? Oh, I'm not used to it, but it is nice to see how much fun it can be," he said, eyes
meeting the taller's while seeing some spark in them. One that was lightened up and didn't
leave again, rather making Chanyeol reach his hand out. Those rough long fingers calling the
smaller over in a playful way, the alcohol in his veins not making him think twice before
sliding his own slender hand on top of the other's, only to be dragged to the self-made dance
floor.

There was a certain amount of shyness that kept him from moving the way he wanted to, and
Chanyeol noticed that, purposely dancing funny to get him to relax. It only took him a few
seconds before seeing Baekhyun giggle, cheeks red from the wine and expression so
beautiful that he momentarily was mesmerized, " Don't worry about anyone, just have fun."

His words were like a key, opening a lock that had been hidden for years and before he knew
it, he moved his body the way he wanted to. Hips moving from side to side while he cutely
jumped at the drop of the beat. He was gorgeous and ridiculously hot by just simply doing
those moves, the older briefly forgetting to breathe before he joined him.

Their eyes met over and over again, and even though it had been embarrassing at the first,
Baekhyun was now craving his attention, purposely moving a bit closer while grinning like a
winner of a million bucks. Back home, he would have never done something like this, no
dancing or drinking with strangers. It simply would have not been possible, but Chanyeol
truly turned the pages faster than anyone else could have done.

At one point, he started to hear his own heartbeat pumping through his ears, so loud and fast,
fully knowing it was because of the older man. His presence usually made him feel calm, but
now it drove him insane especially when he noticed the sweat rolling down the side of his
face. It was beautiful because the fairy lights reflected on it, golden liquid making him
ethereal and maybe that was also the reason he didn't notice the music changing to something
more sensual.

The moment it settled in, everyone had already found a partner to slow dance with and
Baekhyun was left looking around, slight nervousness creeping up his body. Chanyeol saw
that and he also noticed the wink from Kyungsoo, groan hidden behind his sharp teeth. The
moment was perfect, maybe even more than that. Although he knew that he should have held
back, moralistically, he simply couldn't.

Not when the smaller seemed so desperate for his touch, so interested in what could happen.

" Would you be okay with me touching you? We can continue dancing, just...closer."

The question left Baekhyun to stare at the other, lips shining due to the gloss while his hands
were tingling for him to just reach out. A small part within him was holding him back from
doing anything crazier than this, but the bigger part screamed for him to just let it happen.

" I would love to continue dancing."

Taking his hand and stepping closer, a small gasp escaped his lips when Chanyeol snaked an
arm around his waist, the touch unfamiliar but so comfortable. They were breathing the same
air this way, noses almost grazing against each other, wouldn't it have been for the younger to
turn his head to the side, looking at the other couples. They were swaying from side to side,
so slowly that he was able to focus on every detail.

Starting at Chanyeol's stubble and ending at the warmth of his hand.

He could have drowned in that touch and comfort, could have fallen asleep like that, but from
one second to another, he suddenly was bent backwards carefully, something he didn't expect.
His leg was automatically moving up into the air, arms around the taller's neck while he was
gazing down at him and his lips never looked more sinful.

Chanyeol, as well, just had thought it would be fun to do this, but he didn't expect his focus
falling onto the other's crimson red lips, his dark brown eyes and the moles that seemed to
form a star constellation. Absolutely gorgeous. So gorgeous that he didn't notice himself
moving closer, the music numbing out and time freezing up without them caring about it.

It was as if the moment was too good to be true, Baekhyun not even thinking about pulling
away when his lips were so close to his own, hand squeezing his waist gently but
demandingly. Chanyeol’s other hand was stroking over his warm cheek over and over again,
as if he wanted and needed reassurance. Yet, the alcohol was messing with his senses and
instead of diving in, he giggled, teeth on full display, " Chanyeol...I'm really really drunk."

" You're right, me too," the taller chuckled, acting like the tension never existed while gently
pulling Baekhyun back up, their close proximity not disturbed by the shared confusion on
what could have happened just seconds ago. What both of them did not notice, were a pair of
familiar eyes on them, accidentally having caught their intimate moment while passing by the
street.

Jiwoo was leaning against the wall and had watched Baekhyun lose himself to the fun and
obvious attraction. He had already thought about the possibility, but seeing it in person made
him feel irritated. The tie around his neck suddenly became too tight while he walked back to
his car, head spiraling thoughts he couldn't understand, whereas Baekhyun was still clinging
onto Chanyeol, hands carefully around his neck.
" Chanyeol, in my drunken mind I want to tell you something, you make me feel really safe. "

Admitting those words was easier than he had thought at first, lips forming a soft smile that
displayed honesty and trust. Something the artist appreciated and admired. People were
bustling around them, and the band had long stopped playing music, but they were still in
their own world, " Is that so? That is really nice to know, actually. Do you feel ready for a
drawing session?"

" I think yes, but not now…I'm tired," he replied, head subconsciously moving forward to
lean against the older man's chest, eyes closing due to the comforting scent and warmth. It
felt like he was thrown back to his teenage years, the need for sleep at random times and
places just suddenly popping up and ruining a great evening, " Can you bring me home?"

" Of course I can. Climb on my back."

At some point, it seemed that Baekhyun had fallen asleep on Chanyeol’s back, the taller only
noticing when they had crossed half of the way they had to take, and he could not hold back
the literal smile on his face, knowing he felt this safe in his arms. He made sure not to touch
him too much and rested his arms right under his knees, knowing that everything else would
cut through more than one rule they had to respect up till now.

Ridiculous, actually, because the moment they had shared on the dance floor was obvious to
everyone’s eyes, there was more than just simple comfort, and he realized that it started to be
more difficult to hold back with every moment they spent together. His original goal of being
allowed to draw his beauty, had turned into something more than that, and he absolutely
despised himself for not caring about the outcome.

Seeing the apartment up the hill, he gently pinched the underside of his knee to wake him up,
but to no avail. Baekhyun was far away in dreamland, his long lashes stroking over his
cheeks almost mystically. And he would have adored the view for longer, but once on the
stairs he noticed Jiwoo, a cigarette in his hands, smile gentle and yet seeming quite forced.
Their business relationship had always been professional, and Chanyeol appreciated his help
more than anything, but who would have thought that the current situation put everything at
risk.

“ Good evening, he fell asleep at the street festival, so I brought him back.”

“ That is really nice of you, Chanyeol. You can bring him inside and lay him down on the
couch.”

His reply didn’t surprise him anymore, not when he knew that they actually weren’t together
out of love but because of money. To some extent, it was actually a relief, but it was also
more than sad, knowing that Baekhyun had been living like that for a pretty long time.
Simply nodding his head and walking inside, he was amazed by the interior and view, almost
similar to his own, but there was a certain coldness. Eyeing the sofa, he walked over to it and
carefully laid the smaller down, hand itching to reach out and stroke through his hair, but he
kept himself from doing so.
Instead of that, he reached for a blanket and placed it over his body, making sure he was okay
and warm one last time and then walked back out to be faced with his sponsor, hands hiding
behind his back both in respect and a slight dose of fear, “ I laid him down, and I apologize
for the inconvenience, the wine that was sold was pretty strong.”

“ Oh it’s okay, he can’t hold his liquor to be honest. Also a street festival? Was that the
inspiration for the portrait?”

The underlying tone was there, and Chanyeol could understand it, Baekhyun was Jiwoo’s
fiancé after all and hearing about casual meetings must have seemed weird. But on the other
hand, the taller one knew about their real situation, and it confused him how the other
suddenly seemed so interested, lips begging him to just spill what was on his mind, but he
chose decency over brute behavior, “ I decided to show him around town to be exact. You
stay here for three months, am I correct? I wanted to make the stay worth-while. But to
answer your question more accurately, we will start painting this week.”

“ I see. Well, I can’t hold good manners against you, that is really helpful. And make sure to
keep me updated about the progress.”

Nodding his head and offering a gentle smile, he bid his goodbye with a weird feeling in his
chest, the guilt for feeling that way towards Baekhyun threatening to eat him up, but
simultaneously, he wanted to dive into it some more, simply knowing that it wasn’t just a
passing emotion.

And maybe it was the same for Baekhyun, something he would love to find out one of those
days.

_____________________________

The morning after was truly one of a kind, with his neck aching from his sleeping position
and his pullover suddenly being way too warm. Baekhyun noticed he was on the couch when
he heard the coffee machine going off, ears sensitive and making him groan, while he
stretched himself. Thinking about the place he woke up, he remembered Chanyeol carrying
him home and that led to the softest blush across his face, lips captured by his teeth for a
second. That was until Jiwoo came into the picture, clad in a suit and a coffee to go in his
hands.

“ You woke up. Good.”

“ Do you have another meeting?” he asked curiously, knowing it would mean that he had
time for himself once again, thoughts already wandering to the tall artist. He noticed over the
expanse of the last week and the current one, that not once did he take his sleeping pills, a
comfort settling in his chest which he couldn’t fathom. Knowing he usually tended to take
them every night, it now seemed like he didn’t need them anymore, and he also knew that
Jiwoo noticed that because the side effects were quite frequent and now, no longer visible.

“ Yes and no. I’m going to leave for Rome, Baekhyun. Three whole weeks.”
“ That is so sudden, why didn’t you tell me beforehand, I don’t even know how to handle
everything here.”

Rubbing his temples he tried to get rid of the headache, stress evident in his voice because he
knew he had to keep an eye on everything and especially the preparations for the gala in a
few weeks. Something he gladly could have done without. Sitting upright slowly, he watched
the other reach for his suitcase and walk towards the door, just simply feeling ridiculed and
not taken seriously.

“ You just have to keep an eye on everything, write me if something happens. Also, make
sure the portrait is drawn by the time I’m back, I’m sure Chanyeol will be able to handle it.”

Staring at the leaving back and slightly flinching when the door was closed a bit too harshly,
he sat there several minutes, just wondering how he deserved this treatment and actually
holding back tears. Jiwoo knew exactly that he hated being left alone and overwhelmed with
tasks, he knew that he wasn’t the best with strangers, so why didn’t he care to prepare him
better?

Looking towards the terrace, he noticed the weather being way different than the other days,
there were clouds covering the heat of the sun, but they were not hiding rain or a storm. A
calm and yet uncertain day. He liked it, though, because it reflected the way he was feeling.
Looking down at himself and smelling the wine and food from yesterday, he got up for a
shower, clothes shed while he walked towards the bathroom.

It was the moment the hot water touched his skin that he remembered the same warmth from
Chanyeol’s hands. The previous night wasn’t blurry in his head, it wasn’t a drunken mess but
rather clear and that was a huge problem. Never before had he been as honest as he had been
in that moment, and on top of that, he had never felt the need for a kiss more than during their
shared gaze. He could reminisce the exact way the other had held his waist, the slight
pressure of his fingers and also the want in the other's eyes.

Baekhyun felt like it couldn't be any clearer at this point because he knew he was heavily
crushing on the artist. There were many aspects leading to that conclusion, but the biggest
one was the safety he was holding. He wasn't someone who easily could display what he was
feeling, not after years of hiding everything that could have given away a glimmer of his true
needs. At some point, it started to feel like it had freezed up within his heart, but now he
noticed how it was melting.

But even though he finally admitted it to himself, he still felt guilty for his feelings. It was
stupid at this point, Jiwoo and his parents being at fault for his messy thoughts and struggles.
For the distance, he still tried to keep from the tall stranger and forced Chanyeol follow suit
as well, but there were moments of weakness in which he actually thirsted for his hands on
him.

That thought alone made him chuckle, the shampoo in his hands washing away with the
warm water and making him squeeze a bit more out of the package. Touching, kissing, sex,
all things he did not have experience in and actually never had wanted to indulge further. He
was satisfied to some point, but the moment he had locked eyes with the older man, he knew
that it was a blatant lie. He forced out needs he never thought he had but now craved like
crazy.

Shaking his head to get rid of that, he quickly finished his shower and dried up, eyes not once
looking at himself in the mirror because he knew he was blushing like crazy. For the first
time in forever, he did not care about what he wore, just picking some loose pants and a shirt
combined with a cardigan, something comfortable and soft. There was only one thing on his
mind and while putting on his converse, he noticed that his hands weren't shaking. There was
no anxiety, only excitement and he desperately was seeking for more.

The clouds were slowly dissolving to make room for blue skies, and it was beautiful. While
walking up the bumpy uneven streets, he noticed a few familiar faces from the festival the
day before, and he was confident enough to greet them, a small handwave before he finally
had Chanyeol's apartment in sight. The lights were out, and he usually could see through the
open kitchen window, it was now closed, making him wonder if the taller was even at home.

Disappointment quickly found its way on his face and when he finally stopped right in front
of the house, he noticed someone sitting at the beach, head hanging low and a blank canvas
right in front of him. From the posture and broad back, he knew it was the older and his
behavior worried him, leading Baekhyun to take off his shoes and slowly walk closer through
the sand, toes tickling from the feeling.

" Chanyeol?"

He hadn't expected to hear a voice he had learned to desperately need, and he definitely
wasn't prepared to show him how he currently looked like, so instead of immediately turning
around, he dried the cold tears on his cheeks, nose running the slightest bit, " I didn't expect
you to come over today…"

" I'm sorry...I...I wanted to see you, but I can leave if you don't feel well."

Shaking his head, he patted the space beside him and waited for Baekhyun to sit down. Eyes
still locked on the canvas and the acrylics he had brought along, Chanyeol stroked through
his own hair, trying to calm his thoughts and terrible mood.

" It's okay, today is just a sad day. My father died four years ago, you know, it's not easy for
me, especially because my mom is so far away..."

Not sure how to reply, Baekhyun's hand itched to reach out and touch the taller, but he
instead settled for staring ahead to the ocean and then up to the sky, words laying on his
tongue. There had been instances where his books had talked about the death of loved ones,
but not once had he felt the need to simply take care of someone who was sad.

Now, however, he craved for a small smile that would tell him he would feel better again.

" Chanyeol, what do you see when you look at the sky? Tell me the first thought that comes
to your mind."
It was cute how he could see the confusion in the other's doe eyes, dried salt on his cheeks
while his nose was so red. The vulnerability was big, and the younger man felt honored that
he was allowed to see it, but he also had this strong urge to hold him tightly, "...An endless
horizon."

" Endless, right. You know how many stars there are? Too many to count, and everyday a
new one is born. I want you to see this as lost loved ones staying with you forever. One of
those stars is your father and not once did he stop looking after you. He is still there."

Not having expected Chanyeol to suddenly start crying again, he regretted his words for a
second and looked around them, the beach empty and quiet except the waves crashing. That
was also the moment he seemed to stop worrying and instead moved to sit on his knees, arms
reaching out to wrap around the taller sideways. His head was carefully laying on his
shoulder, and he just hoped he could offer some comfort.

" Everything will be okay again...Let it all out."

Seconds turned into minutes, and when it started to feel like hours, the smaller felt a hand
wrap around his back as well. It was quite intimate, them both sitting in the sand and not
saying anything, but Baekhyun also felt like the older man needed it and that was why he
pulled away to look at him, quite surprised when Chanyeol did the same.

Their faces were as close as the night before, noses actually having brushed against each
other this time, eyes looking straight into the opposite ones. Baekhyun noticed the streaks of
tears, but he also noticed the fast beating of his own heart, hammering against his ribcage. It
hurt, and it begged him to do something ,but the timing was definitely not good.

" Thank you for saying that, I didn't want to show you such a side of myself, but...I get
emotional really easily," Chanyeol explained, gaze still on the other's lips after he had moved
away. The warmth that had spread through his chest after their hug was astronomical, eyes
hurting but the overall pain bearable. Maybe it was Baekhyun's presence and his tender smile,
or maybe that's just what he wanted it to be.

And the smaller noticed the gentle gaze, and actually felt shy about it. So while the other was
drying his face, he continuously stroked his hair behind his ears, eyes glued to the water in
front of him, " I won't tell anyone but, now you told me two things about yourself. I need to
catch up."

" How about you tell me tonight? Am I allowed to take you somewhere?"

Lips captured between his teeth, Baekhyun licked them once and then looked at the painter,
eyes glistening with unshed excitement, nose scrunching cutely when the fresh air hit his
face. There was a difference in how he started to act, way more comfortable and open instead
of creating a distance and both felt that.

" Yes...I allow you to."

-
They spent the next hours lazing around at the beach and eating pizza, Baekhyun watching
Chanyeol paint the sunrise and ocean with such a calmness that it mesmerized him and made
him forget about the troubles of the morning. The silence hugging them both was comforting,
and he could have fallen asleep like that, cold sand under his body pressing against him.

But as soon as he wanted to relax, they were already up on their feet again, the smaller
climbing into the painter’s car after he packed some snacks. He did not ask what he had
planned for them both to do, knowing he could trust him, and at this point, spending time
together was more of the essence than his pressuring thoughts.

Having the window halfway open, he closed his eyes when the fresh air hit his face,
Chanyeol driving up the hill and out of the town, only trees and fields in the distance. It was
beautiful and worth a picture, which is why he took out his smartphone to capture the
moment, a smile on his lips making Chanyeol grin softly, “ Did you tell Jiwoo that you are
with me again today?”

“ He left for Rome, Chanyeol. I will be alone for the next three weeks,” he replied, before
looking at the other, a knowing glance in both their eyes. A dangerous one at that because
words were unspoken but expressions were louder, Baekhyun feeling freed from the circle his
fiancé had drawn around him.

“ I see. Well, I don’t need to bring you back home at a certain hour then,” he teased, glad
when he was able to make the smaller giggle. A noise he hadn’t heard just yet, and it felt like
he was suddenly a prisoner of the other’s, the hold gentle around his heart yet tight enough to
keep him in place. Even the scenery wasn’t enough distraction to forget about it, and he knew
he would have loved to just reach over, hand finding Baekhyun’s, but he held himself back.

The sun was slowly deciding to go down once more, and it just reminded him of what was
laying ahead, a smile finding his lips almost automatically, before he parked the car close to
the woods. Baekhyun briefly wondered if he wanted to take him for a walk, but that changed
when he stepped out and saw the cliffs on the other side. Tons of flower fields were covering
the ground, the ocean far off in the distance and he instantly knew where he saw it once.

“ Is this the place you drew?”

“ Yes. Let me show you around.”

Listening to the rustling of the grass while Baekhyun followed the other, he took a deep
breath, the air up here so clear and fresh. His hands occasionally slid over the flowers they
passed by, fingers grazing the petals just slightly but enough to spark a sense of freedom
within his soul. Chanyeol was walking ahead but stopped at a space where the grass wasn’t as
high, prints of people having sat there.

“ I come here when I need space, and when I want to stargaze, which is why I brought you
along. The clouds have cleared up, and it's going to be dark soon, wait here.”

Feeling his heart skip a beat at his words, and trying to ignore the underlying romantic note
of this whole situation, the smaller simply nodded and watched him walk back to the car. It
was so quiet, the waves crashing in the distance being the only sound and all he could see
were small black spots, indicating other people walking along the beach. They were all alone
up here, only within each other’s presence and that made Baekhyun so conscious about
everything.

Waiting for him to come back, he smiled when he saw the blanket and watched him lay it
down on the grass, immediately taking off his shoes to sit down. There was a basket as well,
with the snacks Chanyeol had packed earlier, the scent so intense and mouth watering, but he
chose to stay put and instead looked at the other when he sat down as well, their shoulders
grazing once.

“ How about you tell me something about yourself now, we have all the time in the world.”

Humming at his words, he stroked through his brown locks, twirling the ends in thought.
There wasn’t much he could tell about himself, that would have been interesting, but with the
older, he felt like he wouldn’t mind even the most unnecessary one, lips pouting briefly
before he met the painter’s brown orbs.

“ I had been prescribed with sleeping pills three years ago and since then I’ve been using
them everyday because of insomnia and bad dreams. The funny thing, though, is that I
stopped using them ever since we’ve landed. I wonder why…” he explained, playfully
grinning at Chanyeol and hoping he would catch on, and it seemed like he did, his ears being
quite red. It didn’t even have to have a romantic meaning, but it was a sign of trust and that
ultimately made Baekhyun blush as well.

“ We’re even now. I’m glad you don’t need to take medication anymore…”

Staring ahead at the endless amount of water, his thoughts wandered to his home for a
second, realizing that he actually did not miss it at all. Not his apartment, not his parents and
definitely not his work. What he started to treasure were the little moments and nature. The
calm, relaxing atmosphere, and most importantly, Chanyeol.

A part of his brain was telling him no, that this could end badly, the other part screamed yes,
because he finally deserved happiness. Twenty-three years of his life were not filled with
precious memories and moments, and he needed this change. Jiwoo was nowhere in sight, his
constant gaze for once not on him, and for today, Baekhyun decided to let go of his worries
and rather focus on what he thirsted for.

Slowly falling backwards onto the blanket, he laid down and wrapped his cardigan around
himself, sensing eyes on him, and he absolutely loved it. The wind was getting the least bit
colder, the sky was turning darker, and he only ended up biting his lip in excitement when he
could see Chanyeol laying down as well, hands so close to each other. Stars were aligning in
the sky, some brighter than others, some outshining all, and at one point, he simply reached
up his hand to point at the one right above them.

“ I’m sure that is your father, Chanyeol. He keeps an eye on you. The brightest of them all.”

The genuineness of his words made the taller chuckle softly, eyes finding the star he was
pointing at, and he did not know what came over him, but he reached out as well, their hands
now beside each other, momentarily brushing their fingers together. He noticed how the other
flinched for a second, probably nervous about the situation and yet, he did not move away, “
It sure does shine the brightest out of all.”

Following the line of Baekhyun’s mouth and witnessing the small nod, he decided to just risk
it all and go for it, hand snaking itself in between the smaller one’s palm and holding it gently
before pressing it against his chest. There was a moment of silence, deafening to some extent,
and it was thrilling for the smaller to be touched like this, a simple hand holding making him
feel like he was walking on clouds. His cheeks were glowing red, and he was glad that the
darkness hid his frame, while his fingers went on an adventure and stroked along Chanyeol’s,
feeling how rough they actually were, the painting work he’d done having left their trails.

“ Is this okay for you?”

“ You’re asking quite late,” Baekhyun giggled, thumb now drawing circles on the back of the
taller’s hand, while the painter was doing the same to him. It was so intimate and soft,
something he had never experienced before and he now knew why a lot of people loved it, “
But yes, it is more than okay.”

The more the night darkened, the more he did not want to let go of Chanyeol’s hand. They
stayed in the same position, and even though it felt like hours went by, it was roughly only
one. He had thought the taller man had fallen asleep at one point because he was so quiet, but
his thumb never stopped caressing him, and his eyes continued to stare up at the sky. Back in
Seoul he would have never done something like that, especially not laying in dew grass. His
clothes were too expensive, hair styled too perfectly to risk it.

What a joke that was, now that he knew what he actually had missed out on. Life should have
never been only about his job and about earning money, it was way more than that. There was
happiness and excitement, and now that he learned how to handle it, he did not plan on
letting it go anytime soon. Chanyeol, though, quite literally let go to stand up, pulling
Baekhyun from his trance and making him look at him.

“ One more hour and it will be too cold up here, let me drive you back home, okay?”

Folding the blanket together with the other, the mood between them was way different than
the days before, the pull so much stronger yet so soft. It felt like they had known each other
for ages, ridiculous, Baekhyun knew that, but he wanted to feel like this forever, no thing in
the world making him as affected as Chanyeol was able to.

Driving back had something sad, though, because they had to part ways for the day, and he
also knew they would not be able to see each other for the next few days until their drawing
appointment. Maybe that was the thing that made him cautious about the way he was feeling
in the first place, the crush on the taller one being bigger than the last time. It grew steadily,
and he definitely never felt like that before.

For Chanyeol it wasn’t any different, because now that he had been allowed to hold the
smaller’s hand, he craved for more. Things he shouldn’t even think of, things that went
further than just an innocent touch. He couldn’t help himself, not when he was so attracted to
Baekhyun, not when he was like the cookies he had wanted in his childhood, those that made
him addicted only to bake them over and over again because he couldn’t get enough. Which
is why when they stopped in front of the other’s apartment, hidden in the shadows of the
night, he did not want to let Baekhyun go.

And the brown haired man did not want to leave as well. The tension was there again, barely
visible but big enough to make the air seem heated. Simply staring ahead and tapping his
fingers against his knees, he grinned at the artist when their eyes met, equal understanding
reflected in them.

“ Baek-”

“ Chany-”

Giggling at how they both spoke up at the same time, Baekhyun hid his laughter behind his
hand, scooting the slightest bit closer until their shoulders were touching. It was the least he
could do when it came to ‘taking the first step’, and he knew that Chanyeol knew that as well.
Someone who reacted the way he did due to a mere handshake could not be as experienced as
others, but he was comfortable with that.

“ ...You go first.”

“ I just wanted to thank you,” Chanyeol replied, while scratching the back of his neck. He
was actually slightly embarrassed, and he sincerely hoped it wasn’t too obvious. But it was
hard to focus on that when Baekhyun seemed to move even closer, their noses almost
touching, because he also leaned over, teasingly, playfully.

“ For?”

“ For keeping me company today…”

Listening to the taller’s words getting quieter, Baekhyun stared right into his eyes and down
to his lips several times, his fingers tingling, just like his feet and overall the nerves in his
body. It was as if he was on fire, a comfortable warmth that made him brave. He knew that
Chanyeol was thinking about something different, and he also saw him staring at his lips as
well. It was as if they were dancing around each other, none of them two taking the next step
because they feared to mess it up.

There was a lot that could go wrong, but was there really a way to keep your emotions in
check when the mutual attraction was this suffocating? For the smaller, this was a first after
all, and he knew he could not control his needs especially not when the older man gently
cupped his face and stroked his rough thumb along his cheekbone, so tenderly as if he was
expensive china. It reminded him of the time they made pasta and he removed flour from his
face, only that now he was a bit more sure about the way he was feeling.

And it did not take him long when Chanyeol leaned closer and their lips met, a spark igniting
between them, similar to fireworks. There was no pressure, no force, they were simply testing
the waters, and they both liked it way too much for a mere smooch. Which is when they
finally pulled apart again and stared into each other’s hazy eyes, no words were spoken.
Baekhyun dived right back in, own smaller shaky hands scrambling to seek leverage on the
older man’s shoulders.

Suddenly it was like they had lightened up a whole set of fireworks, one that slowly burned
and then exploded at once because where Chanyeol’s hand had been on his face, it was now
grabbing the side of his tiny waist, pulling him impossibly closer until he actually ended up
sitting on his lap. A new position, an intimate one but he lost it the second the other held him
so carefully, his lips moving slowly over his own before his teeth bit into Baekhyun’s bottom
lip, carefully pulling on it.

A string of spit connecting them when the artist licked it up and pressed his tongue against
the younger’s teeth, gently asking for entrance. It was too much at once, so many new
feelings combined in one situation, but Baekhyun was weak and needy, and it made him
submit like warm pudding, melting into his touch and letting his own tongue meet the other’s.

The sensation was ridiculously high, shaking him to his core while the taller felt like this was
his first kiss as well. Something about it was so special and intense, overwriting every
memory he had of other kisses.

Baekhyun felt so small on his lap, his thighs thick but fitting right on top of his own while his
waist was a sin. Chanyeol could feel the curve down to his ass, and he let his fingers draw
lines on them but he never went further, instead focusing on the smaller’s kitten licks and his
obvious inexperience. The one thing that drove him crazy because it was adorable and he felt
honored to be the first, wanting to make this worthwhile.

Watching the windows slowly fog up from the heat they both created, he pulled away, not
wanting to end the fun so soon, but also knowing that there was no way he would have been
able to hold back if they did it any longer. Simply being allowed to experience this moment
was already thrilling enough and he could see the same though reflected in Baekhyun’s eyes.

“ I just had to...I’m sorry..”

“ Don’t apologize, I...I liked it,” Baekhyun replied almost shyly, even though his lips were
buzzing from their making out and his legs were shaking from the need, indicating how
affected he was. Sitting in the other’s lap, he started to think it was the most comfortable
space possible, and it ultimately made him lean forward to give him one last small kiss. A
promise that was not spoken into existence just yet, “ Thank you for driving me home,
Chanyeol. I will see you in three days, okay?”

Reaching for the door handle, he opened it and carefully climbed out, adjusted his cardigan
which had slipped down his shoulder. His lips were shining a deep red, and his cheeks
probably looked the same, but he also saw Chanyeol’s red ears and lips, and he didn’t feel as
guilty after seeing that they were the same. Not stopping his eyes from wandering down, he
saw a pretty obvious bulge, and it made him giggle and stroke his hair back shyly, kind of
proud that it was because of him.

“ Good night and Chanyeol, you should take care of that when you get home,” he teased,
laughing softly when the blush now creeped onto the other’s cheeks as well, the taller not
ashamed that he felt this way but still embarrassed that it was so obvious. Waving his hand
one last time, he turned his back around and walked up the stairs, just waiting for the engine
to go off before turning the keys and stepping inside.

__________________________________

Waking up had never been this sweet because as soon as he opened his eyes, Baekhyun sat
upright, hair a complete mess, eyes finding the ocean. There was only one thing on his mind
and that was the kiss, Chanyeol, and goddammit, that freaking kiss. It set his cheeks on fire,
his fingers tingle, and his lips throb. That was also the thing that made him quite literally
jump up, sleeping robe swaying with the wind before he stopped at the full length mirror.

His porcelain skin was as unblemished as ever, his hair soft like satin, but his lips were fire
red and the least bit swollen. At closer look, there was a small cut, and he remembered
Chanyeol biting into it, his feet forcing him to do a little dance right then and there, tapping
over the wooden floor like a small child. It just drove him insane to know he had been kissed
and passionately at that. For the first one, it was more than he had expected and as guilty as
he felt about his thoughts, he craved for more.

There were many things in his head, dirtier ones he only had seen in terribly filmed porn
videos, those he wanted to experience himself and most definitely with the taller. That crush
he was having grew steadily, and it felt so so good. With no care in the world he finally
seemed to enjoy his life and with every passing minute, he knew he would fight for it no
matter what.

The days ‘til their appointment rushed by like a busy train on the subway, his nervousness
getting bigger to the point he was shaking like a leaf when it was only three hours away.
Knowing it would be a portrait, he spent a long time in the bathroom to take care of his face
and skin, rubbing vanilla scented body butter all over himself because there was this slight
hope, that tiny need for something to happen, and he did not want to be unprepared, even if
the anxiety ripped him to shreds.

Not putting on makeup except mascara, he chose to wear the pearl earrings his mom had once
bought, accentuating the curve of his cheekbones and making him seem ethereal. Hell, he did
not even know what was going on in Chanyeol’s head and if he was even thinking about the
same thing, but he decided to risk everything he had on his plate. Several dreams had haunted
him to the point he woke up in hot sweats, skin sticking to his satin robe and thoughts
running wild with images of the other’s arms and his lips. There was just no way he would be
able to act normally.

So when he finally stood in front of the painter’s door, clad in only soft pants and a blouse,
his hand was shaking so much that he wasn’t even able to knock. It was as if the warmth was
spreading through his body like liquid fire, both excitement of seeing Chanyeol again and
nervousness making him seem like he had been thrown into cold water, and he absolutely
hated it. Baekhyun was always perfect, behaved and knew what to say, who would have
thought that a single man could completely mess it up and ruin him.

Maybe it was luck, but when he finally calmed down, the other opened the door and leaned
against the frame, his long hair in a messy bun, arms visible due to the tank top. His mouth
dried out like the sahara, lips forming words that were not said and he knew he was in his
tight grip. Chanyeol wasn’t any different, the only thing that he was good in was hiding how
he felt, even though he would have loved to pull him close and kiss him senseless, not caring
about curious eyes on the streets. He didn’t, though, and instead, offered a smile.

“ I was wondering for how long you wanted to stand in front of the door, so I thought I
should take the initiative.”

“ Mean…” Baekhyun chuckled, knowing he was brighter than any freshly picked tomato on
this planet, but he still took off his shoes to walk inside, white socks radiant against the dark
wood of the floor. The apartment was much more cleaned up than before, and Baekhyun
directly stared at the other’s bed and the blank canvas on the opposite of the room, knowing it
was for him “ So...What do I need to do?”

“ You should tell me what you want to drink,” Chanyeol teased and pointed at the wine he
had in the kitchen, trying his hardest to push the memories of their shared kiss to the back of
his head and staying professional, but it was harder now that he noticed how beautiful
Baekhyun looked today, the earrings standing out a lot and raising the expensive aura he
already possessed.

“ Wine then, please.”

The white sheets of the older man’s bed were not rustled but perfectly laying on top of the
mattress and somehow Baekhyun focused on that while holding the glass of red liquor in his
hands, already having taken a big sip to calm his nerves. Chanyeol was organizing his colors
and the seat he was supposed to sit on, his rough hands seeming so big while holding the
brushes. It left him to walk closer and lean down to stare at what he was doing, only gasping
when their faces were almost crashing into each other.

“ Oh sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I just wanted to see what you are doing,” he giggled,
teeth on display and looking so mesmerizing that the taller just had to reach out and move a
loose strand of hair behind the younger’s ear, seeking physical contact and fully enjoying that
he could make him nervous so easily.

“ You didn’t, don’t worry. There is a robe in the bathroom for you to change into, I will be
here waiting for you whenever you're ready."

Listening to his words and not daring to move away, he finally had to, to empty his glass and
prepare his heart, lips way redder from the wine and making him look almost sinful in the
other’s eyes. Deciding that he embarrassed himself enough for now, Baekhyun nodded and
disappeared into the bathroom, hands immediately leaning against the sink to control his
breathing. Eyeing the silk robe that hung behind the door through the mirror, he
subconsciously stroked over his pale, unmarked neck, head planning something he was
actually scared of.

It felt like he wasn’t in control anymore when he shed himself from his clothes, blouse, pants
and underwear all dropping to the floor, the air leaving goosebumps to rake over his skin. He
was not only nervous, but also risking everything he had ever stood for, when he wrapped the
robe around himself and walked back out, seeing how Chanyeol eyed his scantily clad body
in slight confusion but then pointed at the chair.

“ You can sit down here, I would like you to reveal your shoulders and then lay your head
sideways on your arms, eyes staring out of the window.”

The instructions were as clear as water, and the smaller followed them by sitting down, legs
spread over the chair, his ass the slightest bit perked up, due to his back being arched, spine
prominent the more he moved before he took a deep breath. One that felt like it lasted for
hours, simply because it ate him up how anxious he actually was, but then he chose to
swallow everything down and loosened the bow over his stomach, robe slipping open. At
first he only pushed it down to his shoulders, approval coming from Chanyeol who slid closer
with his chair.

And then, he slipped out of it completely, letting the silky fabric pool around his butt and
thighs, naked body revealed to the one person he trusted. The silence was terrifying for
Baekhyun, but what he didn’t know was that Chanyeol was staring at him, not quite realizing
that this was really happening. Right in front of him sat the most beautiful man he had ever
laid eyes on, body quarreling every existing diamond when it came to smoothness, his own
pants suddenly feeling way too tight.

It felt like he was dreaming -- being allowed to see the smaller this vulnerable -- but after
several moments passed by, he knew he wasn’t and he also noticed how badly he seemed to
shake, instant guilt creeping up his throat. There was no way he would ever be able to reject
him, to refuse his offers or to not want this, not when his adoration was starting to get bigger
than ever. So instead of making him wait even longer, he stood up and kneeled down right
behind Baekhyun, his own hands sliding over the cold wood of the chair before his lips found
his back and it made the smaller shiver heavily.

His lips left a burning trail along his spine, and Baekhyun wasn’t able to hear how loud his
own heartbeat rang inside his ears, eyes closing from the feeling while purposely pressing his
body closer to the taller. Chanyeol’s hands met his full curvy hips after a few more seconds,
holding his tender skin gently within his rough fingertips while his mouth wandered further
up towards the smaller’s arm, hearing how heavy he was breathing from the simple act of a
kiss.

The black haired man was littering small open mouth kisses all over the expanse of his back
and spine, his tongue sporadically peeking out to lick the warm skin and mark it as his
territory. He tasted like vanilla, so soft and rich, a scent that suited him quite nicely, and it
also was terribly addicting. Chanyeol sighed at the feel of his soft skin, slowly moving up and
making sure to not leave a single spot untouched.

Baekhyun's lips quivered from the feeling, the smaller leaned his head back when he noticed
the other’s presence closer, Chanyeol’s nose grazing along his shoulder blade up to his neck
only to suck his tender skin a way he did not know was possible, making him moan softly. It
was so quiet in the room, only the waves in the distance and their heavy breathing, and it
made Baekhyun so conscious of everything, especially his own arousal, hands gripping the
back of the chair so hard that his fingers turned white.
But they did not talk, no, not when there was mutual need and thirst for one another. As if
two opposite poles finally were able to find each other, the attraction felt like a strong pull.
Briefly focusing on how the older man was stroking the dip of his naked waist, long fingers
so close to his pelvis, he pushed them away when he felt confident enough and stood up, lithe
body in full sight while he walked backwards to the bed, eyes on Chanyeol the whole time.

It was like he held him captive with his gaze, the taller feeling like he wasn’t able to look at
every part of the literal art in front of him, before Baekhyun sat down on the bed and slid his
body towards the headrest a bit more. His hands were shaking from nervousness, eyes teary
out of fear, uncertainty and arousal when he spread his legs slowly, small feet grazing along
the softness of the mattress, his most private part exposed to the man in front of him and then,
he snaked his own slender hand down between his pale thighs, thin fingers pressing against
his smooth perineum to have Chanyeol’s focus where he wanted it to be.

“ Do...Do you want to paint this here as well?”

“ I want to do so much more than that,” the taller replied breathlessly, body carrying him over
to the bed before his mind could follow, only to drop to the floor once again, knees pressing
against the wood. There was so much he wanted to do, say and touch, but he was
overwhelmed with the situation itself. There was this increasingly strong tension between
them, it had always been there, and now it was finally being freed.

Warm large hands found Baekhyun’s knees and then wandered down to his soft inner thighs,
while the brown haired man watched it with his own two eyes, shocked at how he had started
all of this but was enjoying it so immensely. Fingers stroked along his shivering skin and then
there was a slight pull on his hips, which made him drop onto the pillows, a light gasp
leaving his mouth.

There wasn't even enough time to react or see why Chanyeol did what he did, when strong
hands pushed his milky thighs apart and hot plump lips found his quivering rim. The first
moment was terribly embarrassing, because this was all so new, but then he gripped the
sheets, eyebrows scrunching the more the taller moved down and he definitely knew what he
was doing.

Chanyeol slowly kissed the sensitive area as if he would break if he did it a bit harder, hands
gentle but demandingly pressing into his reddening skin, like a dog that had been waiting for
food and the smaller did not find it in him to act shy, instead laying his arm over his eyes, to
at least hide how badly he wanted to cry.

And then there was the older man's tongue, wet and rough while it licked over his entrance
over and over again, so often that his legs started to shiver, hands gripping the soft blankets.
The sensation was ridiculously high and his breathing got louder as well, soft gasps leaving
his swollen lips like a melody.

Arching his back slightly off the mattress, when Chanyeol suddenly pushed his tongue inside
his needy hole, his long hair tickled all the places his mouth wasn't occupied with, tears now
rolling down Baekhyun's cheeks from how good he felt, and it made him almost sob quietly.
The taller heard it, face moving up to instead kiss his perineum gently and then stare at
Baekhyun to make sure he's okay, worry glazing over his eyes. The man under him was
ethereal, with his body glowing from the sweat, chest moving up and down from the
breathing and that's when he focused on his small pink nipples, reminding him of the time he
had accidentally witnessed them.

Now he was in a much different situation and that made him smile, before he climbed
carefully in between his thighs, mouth finding the other's navel only to dip his tongue inside
and kiss the area, leaving no space untouched. Baekhyun decided to be brave enough to look,
but it only affected him even more, seeing how that buff strong and beautiful man was
caressing his stomach and hips, mouth sliding so gently over it.

There was so much love and adoration in the way he acted and for a moment, he wondered if
he even deserved it. Knowing that the tears were still rolling down his cheeks, he sniffed his
nose once, only to be faced with the older man staring at him, spit making his lips glow in the
soft light from the sun. And maybe that view alone was the key to his confidence, shaky
hands reaching out to pull Chanyeol closer by his cheeks, lips hungrily pressing against each
other.

While being completely naked, the other was still fully dressed and it sure felt weird when
their bodies rubbed against each other, soft material of his pants stroking along Baekhyun's
sensitive places. Their tongues were moving languidly, with the smaller being able to taste
himself, and it turned him on immensely, dick twitching against his stomach.

If the weather was already hot, the air around them was a whole other level, so much pent up
tension and need poured into the simple action of a kiss, one that threatened to turn into
more, forcing Baekhyun to pull away and breathe. It was still hard for him because of it being
new, but that didn't mean he wouldn't want to do it over and over again, lips throbbing and
eyes hazy but staring right into Chanyeol's.

" You're beautiful…"

It made him giggle. A small brief one that lightened up his whole face, momentarily
forgetting about the situation they were currently in. His pearl earrings were reflecting the
sun beams every time he moved his head, and he simply couldn't believe how happy those
words had made him, " Everyone always calls me beautiful, and I thought it lost its meaning,
but...when you say it, my heart beats so fast that I'm scared it will drop out of my chest."

Smiling at each other in understanding and thirst, Chanyeol left a small kiss against the
other's cheek, before sliding down again to kiss his chest, lips finding his left nipple and
holding it captive, teeth just slightly scraping over the surface. It was uncomfortable at first,
but then it started to feel good, and Baekhyun gently carded one of his hands through the
other's long hair, thin fingers grabbing some of his soft strands.

His other nipple was continuously caressed by his fingers, rubbing, pulling and pinching the
pink nub, just knowing that it was already starting to swell. He was more than sensitive and
he wasn't surprised that he felt like that as well, during sex.
Sex , the word disturbed his head for a second because it still felt surreal, especially with
someone like Chanyeol. He was so, so perfect, and Baekhyun was just a spoiled depressed
brat.

The knowledge of him being allowed to do this with someone he dearly liked, made him bite
his lips and close his eyes, sorting his thoughts for a brief moment before suddenly, all
contact with the tall man was gone. There was brief panic in his eyes when he looked at him,
Chanyeol staring so lovingly and intensely while his hand reached towards the nightstand,
but then it made sense. Lube and condoms were dropped onto the pillow beside him, and it
just then clicked that he would feel him inside himself pretty soon, something he needed so
badly, something that actually scared him.

And that was the exact moment he reached out to grab the other's arm, wanting his attention
on him, but when he gained it, it felt like every part of his body froze up, eyes glued to
Chanyeol's golden brown ones, the sweat on his skin starting to feel cold and the older
noticed that, reassuring smile plastered on his lips when he came closer to kiss Baekhyun's
cheek and then earlobe to whisper into it, " You can tell me anything, trust me."

Nudging his button nose against the painter's cheek, while his hand caressed his jaw,
Baekhyun gave him a small kiss as well and then leaned up to whisper right back into his ear,
heart threatening to jump out of his chest from fear, " I've never done anything like this
before, I'm so so nervous."

Voicing out his worries, even though he had been the one who had initiated the whole thing,
he wondered if Chanyeol would laugh now, keep a distance or make fun of him. He was used
to everything that could be compared to being negative, but instead of that, his lips were
claimed again. A gentle kiss, not even close to the messy one they had shared before. One
that made his chest tighten up and his eyes to feel wet, and then, there was the older man's
hand between his legs, cold liquid on his fingers while they grazed over his clenching
entrance.

" I will make you feel good."

Tensing slightly when a finger was pushed inside of him, it felt foreign and burned, but it also
was hot and wet, lips quivering from the feeling. His whole body was covered in sweat, hair
starting to stick to his forehead the more Chanyeol twisted that finger deeper along his tight
walls and he knew he was staring at him, which is why he kept his eyes closed. His smaller,
slender body was caught under the taller's broad and heavy one, a shadow casting onto the
mattress the more he leaned closer and the size difference turned him on to no end.

Chanyeol kept Baekhyun’s thighs apart gently while he fingered him, his free hand stroking
over the expanse of his legs as if he wanted to write everything onto them that he couldn't say
out loud. Baekhyun was beautiful when he arched his back from the pleasure of his finger
rubbing over his prostate, he was beautiful while covering his face in embarrassment and he
was beautiful when his whole body shivered every time the taller touched him the least bit
more.

When a second and third finger pushed into his hole together, it felt like he was being ripped
apart, and he absolutely tried to not show it in his expressions, teeth now biting so heavily
onto his bottom lip that he was able to taste the iron of blood. It made the taller stop and
instead rub his thumb over the smaller's lips, soothing the pain he brought upon himself.

" Is it too much?"

" N-No...Please don't stop," Baekhyun almost begged, needing this, having been waiting for
it, and he could see that it would have been impossible for Chanyeol as well. Seconds passed
by like hours when the older man suddenly moved down between his milky legs once more,
mouth coming in contact with his cock and before he could react, he slid down, engulfing the
throbbing dick with his warm wet cavern.

It made the smaller throw back his head and almost choke on the whiney moan that crawled
up his throat, whimpers following with every movement the other did, his fingers
simultaneously moving inside of him faster and faster. All those sensations at once were like
a set of balloons popping at the same time, body subconsciously moving into the feeling with
his hips bucking up the more he pressed against that spot.

" Cha-...I feel good there…" he gasped, the blush intensifying and making him feel light
headed. The heat of the whole moment setting him on fire the more Chanyeol sucked him off,
his massive body in between his legs being so hot that he suddenly felt that pull inside his
stomach, hands gently pushing against the painter's shoulders, " Please stop…I'm so close."

" Then cum for me, it's okay. "

Shaking his head softly, he fought with himself and his words for a moment, tears glistening
in his eyes the more he focused on Chanyeol’s expression and the wetness around his mouth,
his dick twitching against his stomach while his hole did the same around the taller's fingers,
knowing he could feel it, " I don't want to cum like this."

One glance of his eyes towards the other's pants told the older man everything he needed to
know, hand gently retreating and fingers pulling out, just carefully rubbing the remains of
lube all over Baekhyun's fluttering rim, loving the way he reacted and closed his eyes. The
warm air that came from the window tousled his sweaty hair the least bit more, while he
pulled down the sweats he had been wearing, revealing how hard he actually already was.

It made the smaller swallow heavily, but also feel excited, eyes curiously following the way
he put on a condom and used even more lube, so much that the mattress under his ass started
to feel wet. But he knew they needed it when he positioned himself and bottomed out slowly,
the stretch immense and making him sob heavily. Showing vulnerability seemed almost
comforting, and Baekhyun knew Chanyeol would take care of him no matter what.

Heavily breathing the more he pushed in, the older suddenly leaned down and kissed his lips
again, harder each time he tensed from the feeling, softer when he relaxed. It was kind of
rewarding for Baekhyun, and he was thankful when their bodies were connected completely,
the taller's pelvis against his ass, chests rubbing over each other while Chanyeol pressed his
lips against the smaller's neck. And while stroking through his black hair and loosening the
bun he had, completely, the smaller noticed the ring on his finger, plain silver reflecting the
sun.
It didn't hold any meaning, but it still made him momentarily feel guilty, when he realized, in
what type of situation he currently was, and Chanyeol noticed that, head moving up to look at
him softly. There weren't any words spoken when he reached for his hand and slowly slid off
the ring to lay it down on the nightstand, mouth replacing the spot it had been to kiss his
knuckles. To some extent this felt wrong, while both knew it wasn't at all.

They craved for each other like the earth craved for water, and there was no way they would
have not ended up like this. Baekhyun felt like that exact moment changed a lot within his
head, the heavy weight removed to be able to engage in the way he was feeling and that made
him nuzzle into the taller's neck, lips kissing up until he reached his ear, "...Make a mess out
of me."

Moaning loudly when Chanyeol pulled out and pushed back inside, it took only a few
seconds to get used to the pressure inside his belly, waist and pelvis shaking from the new
feeling, but then he grabbed the sheets tightly within his hands, eyes screwed shut while the
taller indeed was fucking him passionately and hard, a way he never knew he needed.

Groaning while looking down at the smaller, Chanyeol tried his best to not go overboard even
though he wanted to do it so badly, wanted to wreck his tender body and leave his imprints
everywhere to say 'this man is mine' . But it was his first time and he wanted it to be
something he would like to remember, instead touching every part of his body and ultimately
stopping at his nipples to gently pinch them between his rough fingers, goosebumps erupting
on Baekhyun's body.

" Ah…Yeol-ah.."

" Am I allowed to go a bit faster?" Chanyeol asked almost teasingly, face coming closer until
he could kiss the younger's forehead and his nose, lips sneaking towards his ear once more " I
want to be deeper inside of you…"

Whining loudly at his words and literally gushing a huge amount of precum onto his own
stomach, Baekhyun tried to sort his thoughts and emotions, body craving more and more
while his head already started to hurt from the tension and exhaustion. It left him to
vigorously nod his head though, words stuck in his throat as if they didn't want to come out,
while his hands now scrambled for Chanyeol’s broad back, accommodating to his harsh
thrusts by scratching his manicured nails all over the other's sweaty skin.

He didn't want to hurt him, but he simply could not suppress the desire of wanting to be
wrecked, legs shaking every time the older man grazed against his prostate and that was also
when that weird feeling was back in his stomach, panic in his eyes from the pleasure. The
bed was creaking loudly the more they moved, the back of his ass hurting from the
continuous pounding of their skin and probably looking red, something he never wanted to
disappear, a memory he wanted to keep forever.

" I...I-I'm close."

" Then cum for me, beautiful. I'm here, everything is alright," Chanyeol replied, eyes so
tender and full of adoration, before he reached down to jerk Baekhyun off gently and in time
with his thrusts, own body feeling close as well, simply because of the way the smaller
looked. So sinful and out of this world, an art piece he wanted to hold down on canvas so
dearly that he feared it would rip him apart.

And it was the most gorgeous sight to see him cum all over his chest, nipples swollen and
perked up from his ministrations, ass clenching so hard that he was forced to stop moving
and instead to groan loudly, harmonizing with the moan that was pulled from Baekhyun's
throat.

Moments passed by in which the smaller didn't open his eyes nor stopped shaking from the
aftermath, only jerking up when Chanyeol slowly moved inside of him again, chasing his
own orgasm. And even though he felt like crying from the oversensitivity, he wanted to make
him feel good as well, shivering hands moving up to hold onto his biceps and squeezing it
gently, urging him to continue.

It was as if the time froze when he also came into the condom, movements slowing down
until he completely stopped, his heavy body still hovering on top of Baekhyun's while both of
them breathed loudly, sweated like crazy and then giggled like they just had heard the best
joke ever. There were just so many endorphins being set free that they couldn't hold it in,
guilt long forgotten and replaced with satisfaction, happiness and need.

Where Baekhyun had thought it would stop after sex, there was so much more things he
craved for now, including cuddling, which is why he did not want Chanyeol to move even
though he had to, his rough warm hands stroking the expanse of his thighs while he pulled
out, " I will clean you up, okay?"

Relaxing immensely when the tall man carefully stroked a warm towel along his legs and ass,
he tried not to wince from the feeling and instead focused on the good things, which was
being able to look at the painter in all his naked glory, his body truly sculptured by gods. He
was so hot and mesmerizing, long black hair adding to the sex appeal he already spread like
pheromones, and it made Baekhyun crave his warmth.

Which is why he did not wait long when he laid back down and instead climbed halfway on
top of the other, arm reaching over his chest to hold him while his face nuzzled into his neck,
"...I am glad that you are the one I gave my first time to."

" And I am glad that you took the first step because I was scared to mess this up," Chanyeol
replied, vulnerable and honest while kissing Baekhyun's wet hair over and over again, " I
think drawing would not be the best idea now, how about we take a nap?"

Giggling at his words and staring at the canvas right across the room, the smaller actually
couldn't believe what he had done and what he had dared to do, cheeks flushing from the
thought before he chose to be brave and look right into the other's brown eyes, lips finding
his in a soft small kiss.

" I should keep my clothes on then, otherwise, we will end up in the same situation again."

" But, would that be bad?"

Knowing lying would be impossible, Baekhyun stroked his slender fingers along the expanse
of the other's chest, feeling the ripped muscles under them while his eyes closed from
exhaustion, "No, not at all."

He woke up when the warm air from earlier now had a cold touch to it, sending shivers down
his spine. Noticing that the thin blanket was only covering his lower half, Baekhyun rubbed
his eyes tiredly, and it took him a few minutes before it finally clicked, and he remembered
everything including the numb ache in his back. His left hand was laying on Chanyeol’s chest
and his head was still nestled in his neck, the taller fast asleep.

It gave him the opportunity to properly look at his profile, eyelashes so long that they stroked
his cheeks, lips swollen and plump, briefly reminiscing the softness of them. There were red
stripes right at the top of his shoulders leading down to his back, and he knew it was his fault,
guilt making itself present in his stomach, but only momentarily because he also knew just
why he had left them.

The knowledge of them having had sex was making his heart race so fast that he feared he
would wake Chanyeol up from the noise, slowly sitting up to look down at the other. His own
chest was covered in love bites, small red ones and also a few darker spots, but he loved all
of them equally, eyes not once finding the ring on the nightstand, not when he was this happy
and detached.

Reaching out to gently stroke over the older man’s cheek, he smiled when the stubble grazed
against his fingers, tickling him just slightly. It was something he had wanted to do since the
first time they had met, now able to do it whenever he wanted to. At least he hoped that.
Carefully pulling on the blanket, he held it to climb on top of the other’s thighs, pressing their
naked bodies against each other once more before moving his hands up and down his abs,
trying to stir him awake in the softest way possible.

And it worked, because only seconds later Chanyeol fluttered his eyes open, a loud yawn
making the smaller giggle cutely, cheeks glowing in the light of the moon, “ Good evening,
did you sleep well?”

“ The best in years, and you?” the taller man asked with his deep cranky voice, big hands
moving up to hold Baekhyun’s waist and stroke the skin softly, purposely letting his fingers
wander further down towards his ass once. Actually, it was hard to believe that the other was
sitting on his lap, naked and absolutely stunning even though they had been doing not so
relaxing things only hours ago. And he got reminded of that when the other started to rut
against him, surprising them both.

“ I never slept this good, ever.”

“ Hmm, and what are you doing right now?”

Biting his lips at his words, Baekhyun pressed his hands a bit harder against his pecks, hips
rolling slowly while his dick rubbed against the other’s. To be honest, he did not know why
and what he was doing, it was just this pull he felt every time they stared into each other’s
eyes, saying more than words and right now, he knew he wanted to feel the way he had felt
earlier, which is why he leaned down to kiss him and then hover right above his lips, “ It is
my turn to make you feel good.”

Knowing he was still quite loose, the smaller ripped open another condom package to
carefully slip it over Chanyeol’s erection, rubbing his fingers a few times up and down just to
tease him and the groan he was rewarded with, felt like a blessing to his ears. It spurred him
on while he poured lube and sat up on his knees, eyes not leaving the taller’s when he sunk
down again, the stretch forcing a whimper from his mouth until he was situated on his thighs.

Chanyeol was still holding him by his waist, thumbs drawing circles into his skin before he
started to rotate his hips in circles, getting used to the feeling. This position was definitely not
like he had expected because the other was huge, and the feeling of his cock rubbing along
his sweet spot made his breath clog up inside his throat and sit up to properly ride the older
man. There was skin slapping against skin every time he moved back down and hit his thighs
and ass soon in the hold of the taller’s rough hands to force him down harder, which made
Baekhyun see stars.

“ Ah…yes, please.” he sobbed, body leaning forward so the taller could fuck up into him
hard and fast. The pleasure brought tears to his eyes, which were streaming down his face
like a waterfall, hips shaking from both the impact and the need for more, more, more. At one
point, he feared that his eyes would roll back his head when Chanyeol sucked on his nipples
again, warm rough tongue massaging up and down the nub while his cute small cock was
leaking on both of their stomachs.

“ Will you cum for me again?”

Listening to his words only subconsciously, Baekhyun already was way too lost in the
pleasure of being able to reply and instead nuzzled into the painter's neck and shoulder,
submitting completely and just knowing he would be more than sore yet satisfied tomorrow.

And while the moon rose up even higher into the dark starry sky, they continued to make love
again and again, to the point where they fell asleep from exhaustion. Sweat, tears and kisses
shared while their hands found each other to intermingle and caress their connected souls.

__________________________

With the pleasure he had been allowed to taste and also the moments of happiness they
shared, Baekhyun, sadly, also was forced to focus on work, or better said Jiwoo's work. The
gala would take place shortly after his fiancè’s return, and that also meant less time he could
spend with Chanyeol. Even though that was the only thing he really wanted.

They made it work to meet up in the evening, the following days, because of the painting but
this time it did not end with sex. The brown haired man realized how serious the other could
get when it came to his work, and it was both amazing and intimidating. His talent was out of
this world. He wasn't allowed to see the canvas until it was finished, but there was something
telling him that he would probably cry if he ever laid his eyes on it.
The work Jiwoo had left him with wasn't much, but it cost a lot of his energy, simply because
interacting with people tired him out quickly. There was some main organisation he had to
plan when it came to guest lists and places, but also the talking with the artists and waiters, so
when he was able to see Chanyeol all his worries seemed to disappear.

When the second week came around and Monday turned into hell real quick due to problems
with the catering, Baekhyun couldn't have felt more relieved to see the older man at his front
door on Tuesday, the clock not even reading 8 o' clock in the morning. He was still in his
satin robe, hair messy from sleep but the smile on his lips made up for the tiredness.

" What are you doing here??"

" I know that yesterday was terribly exhausting, I know that you didn't feel well, and I know
that you actually just want to sleep right now...but let me kidnap you for the day and lift your
mood, okay?" Chanyeol asked, now standing on the stairs of the younger’s apartment, big
hands reaching out to touch his waist and stroke over it, lips finding his petal shaped ones in
a small tender kiss.

There were no people up just yet, the streets empty except his car and the black haired man
sincerely did not care if anyone would see them, not when Baekhyun sighed so cutely and
clung to him almost desperately, his small hands feeling cold against his broad chest, " Give
me 10 minutes, okay? I will quickly get dressed."

" Take your time, I will wait in the car for you."

Only clad in his cardigan and some loose black pants, Baekhyun found himself basically
running out of the house, sandals clacking against the street while his eyes were only focused
on the man who was staring at him from inside of his car. He looked mesmerizing while
being focused on whatever he was doing and it drove him insane to know that he was
allowed to be with him.

The trip with the vehicle seemed shorter than the times before, the warm air comforting his
tired eyes the more he let it hit his face, and there was one more thing that left a smile on his
lips, Chanyeol's right hand between his own two slender ones, gently stroking his fingers. It
felt so good to be like this, appreciated, wanted and cared for. As if he was finally being fed
after years of starvation.

They didn’t talk, just the quiet melodic sound of the radio that spoke in Italian, probably
recommending songs. It had something nostalgic almost when they stopped at some sort of
garden, green everywhere, and a small stream on the left side of it while there was a big tree
with purple petals close to the water. Actually, the whole thing looked magical, and it seemed
to be a well hidden spot on the island.

Curiosity got the best of him when he got out of the car first and walked closer to the area,
eyes gleaming with calmness and amazement, " Are we allowed to be here? It seems so
private."
" That's why I brought you along for us two to have some time to ourselves, and don't worry,
it's actually my garden."

Blinking his eyes at his words, he watched Chanyeol reach out his hand, and he just held it
instead of continuing to talk, being led towards the tree. The sound of the water flowing
down the hill was so relaxing and nice that he momentarily had his eyes on it, stumbling the
slightest when the taller suddenly stopped and pointed at a blanket on the grass.

" You were here already?"

" I prepared so we can immediately relax together, come sit down with me," the older man
said, the smile on his face blinding while he helped Baekhyun out of his shoes and onto the
blanket. The weather played in their favor, and it was nice to be together with the younger,
his presence brightening his day without even trying.

Baekhyun's eyes felt like they had to take in everything because the beauty of this place
seemed unreal, hands leaning back on the ground, when Chanyeol suddenly laid down
between his legs, his head against the smaller's stomach. He looked like a baby from this
point of view, his big eyes gazing up while his dimples were so deeply engraved in his
cheeks.

His black long hair was, like always, in a messy bun, but this time the younger man felt like
touching it and gently undid it, fingers stroking through the soft strands only to be rewarded
with a loud comforting sigh. It made him giggle and briefly lean down to kiss the painter's
forehead, hands starting to braid his locks slowly.

" Won't you tell me how you got this garden, Chanyeol-ah?"

There were birds flying over their heads, their blue wings stunning while their whistling was
actually the only loud sound in the area, and it ultimately made Chanyeol close his eyes,
relaxing at the touch of the other before he decided to reply, " My father bought it for my
mom when they lived here, he was the one who always kept it clean and pretty. When he
died….when he died my mother was overwhelmed with the work, so I decided to take over.
It indeed is a little secret place."

Baekhyun could feel that it was not easy for the other to talk about it, and he also wasn’t
someone who would dig deeper just to feed his own curiosity, which instead led him to hum
softly under his breath, his slender fingers continuing to braid Chanyeol’s hair. The air up
higher on the hills was indeed cleaner and while life could get hectic and terrifying, right now
it felt like there were just them two and the nature they were surrounded by.

The thoughts that had found him over the expanse of staying in Italy, were worth a book and
it had been ages since he had felt this inspired, lips curving into a smile without him noticing.
Making sure to tie Chanyeol's hair once he was done, his tired eyes found the purple flowers
that were hanging down above them, hands reaching out to pick a few and gently place them
in between the braid, “ Do you know what those flowers are called?”

“ It is a rosewood tree, not that common here to be honest. Do you like it?”
Nodding his head and looking down at Chanyeol he waited a few seconds, before letting
some of the petals rain over the taller’s handsome features, giggling softly when he sneezed
from the tickling sensation, his heart feeling like it was blooming with something he had
always craved for. The older man sat up right in that moment as well, his brown eyes gazing
at Baekhyun and carefully stroking the younger’s hair behind his ear, when he was met with
soft laughter.

“ The braids suit you, it looks adorable.”

“ Hm, I think it’s impossible to look cuter than you do.”

His response was more than surprising, and it made the smaller glow the deepest shade of
red, cheeks on fire while his mouth awkwardly tried to form words, those which did not come
out at all. He should have been used to this, but simultaneously, they had not flirted this
openly ever since they had met, and it made Baekhyun reach behind him into the water, only
to splash the other with it before standing up and running away, naked feet wandering over
the grass. It felt like all sorts of endorphins were set free inside his body when he looked
behind himself, seeing Chanyeol chase him with the biggest grin possible on his face.

When had been the last time he felt this free?

Or a moment where he felt like his age and not like some stressed adult?

He could not pinpoint it and the more he ran, the more he did not want to remember because
all that was nothing compared to the way the other man had come into his life and messed up
everything he had believed was good. Maybe it was too early to think like this, roughly a
month and a week in which he had fallen for someone that still seemed out of reach, but he
knew those feelings within his heart were stronger than any force that could tell him
otherwise.

And the moment he realized that, Chanyeol already had caught up and grabbed him from
behind, strong arms wrapped around his waist while he swung the brown haired man around
carefully, them both drowning in laughter the more they continued it, until the taller set
Baekhyun back down onto the grass. The younger immediately turned back towards him to
stand on his tip toes and wrap his arms around the painter’s broad shoulders, lips moving
closer before they were met in a soft kiss.

One he did not want to end so soon, which is why he clung onto the other, slightly gasping
when he was picked up by his thighs, the strong hold making his legs shiver and his arms
squeeze tighter around Chanyeol’s neck. Their bodies were so close while not close enough,
but it was nothing that seemed to turn into something bigger, just them having fun like they
deserved to. Smiling against the other’s mouth, when he started to walk back to the blanket,
Baekhyun left small butterfly kisses all over his lips and then down to his neck, glowing like
the sun when he was carefully laid down with the tall man between his legs.

It reminded him of the moment they had shared, those moans he had screamed into the night
and the soft touches of the other all over his body. The slight blush did not really disappear
from his tender face, hands holding the older man by his hips, while he closed his eyes to
dwell in the feeling of Chanyeol’s lips against his forehead. It felt right, like this was what he
had always wanted and needed, and the more he wondered about it, the more he knew it was
true.

“ Your plan worked, Chanyeol-ah. I feel much better than earlier.”

It was the start of the third week when Baekhyun found back to the ground of facts and the
biggest one was, Jiwoo would be back by the end of this one. His ring had not been put on
again since that day and was instead laying on his nightdesk, but he knew there were things
they had to talk about and most importantly because of Chanyeol. His career was something
he did not want to risk because he knew how mean and unpredictable his fiancé could be. On
the other hand, he felt like Jiwoo already knew that there was something happening behind
his back because he wasn’t dumb.

Of course, there was nervousness and also fear, but the happiness and content he felt was
worth it. There had been times where he had already thought about fighting against their
engagement, cut it off completely and now that the other man came into the picture as well,
he was more than confident to pull through, not caring who he might disappoint on his way.
There never had been just a single moment that was his and his alone, for what he wanted
and what he needed, so engulfing his current confidence was the only right thing to do.

Today he had received a small letter in the mailbox outside his apartment, which was the first
thing he had seen in the morning, and it filled his chest with unshed love and overwhelming
satisfaction, the small things Chanyeol did making him feel like he was the most important
thing in his life. Something he hoped secretly and wished to be true so badly .

Come and meet me at the peach trees field down the streets at four.

I will wait for you.

Thinking of peaches, he recalled the time they made iced tea, and it also brought back the
first awkward attempts of showing that he was interested. Baekhyun had to say that he was
not used to flirting, so it made up for his behavior. The island was known for its huge fruits
but a peach tree field was something he had never seen, peeking his interest. And it proved to
be intelligible when he stood in front of it, tons of trees and fields reaching over a huge
expanse of the island. There were no people in sight, and it took the smaller some time to find
Chanyeol, who ended up sitting under one of those trees, hidden in the high grass far off the
main field.

Only wearing his favorite black pants and a fitting white blouse, he cleared his throat to gain
the older’s attention, smiling brightly when he looked up at him, “ You found me. Come
here.”

Taking off his sandals, he leaned against the tree and waited for the painter to stand up as
well, lips kept between his teeth for a second before he let them go again. Chanyeol looked
way too good today with his black hair not in a bun and the shirt he was wearing being so
tight around his chest, but he probably did not even know the effect he had on the smaller,
guessing by his innocent expression. He instead looked up to stare at the peaches hanging on
leaves.

“ Is there a specific reason you wanted to meet me here?”

“ Pesco. They remind me of you. Peaches have quite rough skin, don’t they? Just like you,
but once you cut them open...you see the beauty of the fruit. They are very sweet, that’s true,
but they are all so full of vitamins that they enrich your health and life.”

Cutely moving his head to the side, Chanyeol stared at Baekhyun for a few moments,
knowing his words were quite the confession, but due to saying it out loud, he was able to
witness the literal contentment on the brown haired man's face, cheeks glowing in red and
eyes full of adoration.

It made his heartbeat quicken and his smile grow before he stepped closer, one arm beside the
smaller’s head.

“ What about the middle part? The core?”

“ Most people don’t like the work of cleaning that core and making sure nothing goes to
waste because it makes them shiver or feel uncomfortable, but there is more to it than just the
core itself and that resembles you, if someone dares to unfold the whole thing, they are
blessed with the truth.”

It made Baekhyun grin brighter than he ever did before, at least it felt like that because his
cheeks were hurting from the stretch. This was flirting as well, but it seemed to be on such an
intimate level that he wanted it to stay between them, only their eyes to witness this sort of
affection.

There was also a part of him that felt like being brave and for once, he let it take over, hand
reaching for the arm beside his head to stroke his cold fingers along his prominent veins.

“ So you mean to say that I taste good?”

The chuckle he was met with was deep and, to some extent, also rough, sending shivers all
over Baekhyun’s tender body. They were alone and the tree they were leaning against was
hiding them well, only the ocean down the hills and the sun watching them. It felt like he had
been craving for water when Chanyeol pulled him closer by his slender waist, warm fingers
pressing into the parts that weren’t covered by his thin blouse, actually a material that was
quite see through. He wore it on purpose and he knew the taller noticed that.

“ Let me have a taste again, for better judgement.”

“ Go ahead…” The younger whispered, before it turned into a shuddery breath, the taller’s
mouth engulfing his right nipple through the fabric of his blouse before it was replaced by his
tongue. It felt weird when it rubbed over the sensitive pink bud, but it also made his knees
buckle and his hands weak, making him grab the older man’s shoulders for leverage, his
pretty eyes closing almost automatically.
There was a small part of him that thought this was dangerous and risky, out in the open
where people could see them, but with the risk came the fun and he could not avoid that it
turned him on immensely and Chanyeol certainly had his share as well.

The taller had Baekhyun in the palms of his hands, the exact palm that wandered towards his
stomach to pull the blouse up higher, lips directly coming in contact with his perky nipples.
They were so small and hard against his tongue, a feeling he quite enjoyed.

“...And?...”

Moving his mouth up to leave kisses along his soft neck and shoulder, the taller stared right
into the other’s eyes, his face already seeming so affected from the smallest ministrations,
driving him insane. And before he chose to reply, he instead unbuckled Baekhyun’s pants to
pull them down, exposing him to the warm air while his big hand slipped into his underwear,
fingers wrapping around his cock only to squeeze . It made the younger hiccup in arousal, his
lips quivering almost crazily.

“ I didn’t try enough.”

If Baekhyun would have been completely honest, he had hoped for something like this to
happen, the taste he had gotten last time was not enough to compensate for the thrill of
wanting to feel pleasure again.

The sort of pleasure he was introduced to, through Chanyeol, the only person he ever wanted
to be close with like this.

Feeling the older’s rough fingers slide over his cock and press into the slit torturingly slow,
his hips bucked up involuntary, soft lips pressing against the taller's neck and jaw, to at least
distract himself when suddenly all touches were gone.

In front of him stood a man who seemed desperate for him, who wanted him, and it made
Baekhyun impossibly weak. His own hands wandered down to pull his pants off completely
and sit onto the soft blanket which laid at the bottom of the large tree before reaching out to
grab Chanyeol's shirt and drag him in between his naked milky legs.

They were shaking, naturally, because he was nervous all over again, but the other's lips on
his collarbones felt good and made him relax instantly, forgetting their surroundings while
the brown haired man pathetically rolled his hips into the air, searching for the friction he so
desperately wanted to engage in.

" I want to feel you... Chanyeol-ah..."

" Oh really? In what way?" The taller decided to tease, even though he knew exactly what
Baekhyun meant.

Hell, he had nonstop thought about the younger man and his dangerously addicting curves,
the sweet moans and his gorgeous face when he felt the height of pleasure.
The question made Baekhyun whine under his breath, shyness still as fresh and strong as
ever, his eyes glistening with tears that he wanted to get rid of so badly. They were laying in
between the high grass, only some noises from birds disturbing the otherwise deafening
silence, and it made his heartbeat seem louder than it actually was, his ears hurting from the
continous thrumming.

In that exact moment, he realized how lucky he actually currently was, with a man like
Chanyeol wanting him not only in that one way but in every way possible.

And even if the teasing got the best of him and he wanted to disappear into the soil right
under him, he didn't. He decided to tease right back, knowing it would be the one thing the
older man would not expect and that spurred him on, while he leaned forward slightly. Their
noses were brushing against each other, lips so close for a small kiss but he chuckled and
reached down between them instead, guiding Chanyeol's hand towards his clenching hole, " I
want you here..."

It made the older man swallow hard, momentarily forgetting that he wanted to have the upper
hand in this conversation, but then he caught himself and grinned almost evilly, hand
breaking free from the other's slender one to wander up towards Baekhyun's mouth, only to
press his fingertips against his petal shaped lips. At first gentle, he then rubbed harder until
the younger man willingly relaxed his jaw and opened them, two of his fingers slipping
inside and pressing against the warm roof of his cavern, " Suck them, so I can fuck you
properly."

Shivering like crazy at his words, there was so much more dominance in the other's voice,
and Baekhyun honestly considered that he probably was way too into this, body reacting
immediately, with his cock twitching against his stomach. He did what he was told, tongue
coming into contact with the older's finger to swirl it around them, sucking so hard that he
felt the spit roll out of the corner of his mouth, eyes watering from the pressure against the
roof of his teeth.

Their eyes never left one another and maybe that was the thing that made the whole situation
even more intimate, lips parting willingly when Chanyeol pulled his hand back with a string
of spit connecting them, legs being spread until he was literally exposed to the tall man's
eyes. But all of that did not matter when two fingers pressed inside at the same time,
stretching his entrance and sliding along his walls. It hurt, but not as badly as the last time
and the pleasure increased by a tenfold when the taller pressed hard against that spot. It just
simply overshadowed everything else the smaller had ever experienced.

" How does it feel?"

" Better than last time, you're really gentle," he giggled cutely and stroked through the older
man’s soft black hair, the conversation cutting short when the painter twisted his fingers and
spread them inside, cold air briefly joining his hand and making Baekhyun gasp. His arms
found Chanyeol's neck to pull him closer and hide against his shoulder, plump lips kissing his
hair over and over again. It felt like more than just sex between two men, this felt like they
didn't want anything else but this.
Lips huffing out small moans that directly reached the older man's ear, Chanyeol felt like he
was going crazy because he just knew that Baekhyun was not aware of the effect he had on
him. Not aware that a single smile was able to brighten up his whole day or night. His eyes
were on the other, the moment he carefully laid back down on the blanket, admiring how
beautiful his skin looked in the low shadows of the tree as well as the sweat that rolled over
his chest and forehead.

Something about this, did not make him want to stop, to end this earlier than needed, which is
why he moved his fingers slower inside of him now, the stretch harsh and yet not satisfying
enough for Baekhyun. It was actually adorable how obvious it was because his lips were
pouting cutely and his eyebrows were furrowed, words laying on his tongue which he seemed
to be waiting for to spill.

They were playing a dangerous game, and the more they did, the further they got up on the
ladder, the ground being so far away that falling down would hurt badly. That was the thing
that scared him, but he simply couldn't stop himself, not when the smaller was this pliant in
his hold. Not when he wanted to claim him and make him feel good this much, his body
drawn to that of the Baekhyun’s.

" Chanyeol-ah, it's okay...hurry.."

The prospection of Baekhyun wanting this more than anything else, was actually quite funny,
because only weeks prior he had been scared of sex, getting close to people and falling for
them. The brown haired male knew all of those things connected him to the older man, and it
was terrifying.

Why was love this frightening?

Watching Chanyeol pull out a condom from his pocket, he held back the amused grin that
was threatening to wander over his lips, instead realizing how dry his throat had gotten, when
the other pulled it over his own dick, the veins prominent on the outside. For a whole second,
he was amazed that that had fitted inside of him last time, and he was surprised again, when
Chanyeol pushed inside slowly until he bottomed out, the stretch ridiculously small.

Instead of pain, he actually seemed to enjoy it quite a lot because when he focused on his
breathing and heartbeat, he could feel the taller pulse inside of him, making him clench
subconsciously. There was a shared quiet moan from both of them, the breath mingling right
between their mouths, which were so close and it just felt right. Everything about this, even if
they actually were in the middle of a field, the high grass being the only thing that protected
them from curious eyes.

" Be honest, you are quite into doing this, here, outside," Baekhyun whispered right against
the taller’s plump lips, eyes halfway closed while his hands held the painter by his hips. It felt
good to hear his laughter so close, to see the slight blush on his ears and cheeks and know he
was the cause for this. Leaning up a bit more, they kissed before Chanyeol started to move,
shallow at first but then faster and faster. The younger man was able to feel the drag of his
thick cock against his walls and the pressure on his prostate.
It caused tears to stream down his cheeks while the older man muffled his mouth with his
own lips, obviously not wanting anyone to hear them, and it made the brown haired man the
least bit curious if it maybe also was jealousy. Their bodies were so intertwined at this point
that they could feel each other's sweat, Baekhyun's body moving up with every hard thrust
Chanyeol forced into him, while he held onto the tree behind himself, hands pressing into the
bark.

Usually he would have thought this was crazy, everything about this, from the sex to the
location but he couldn’t have cared less, not when Chanyeol looked at him with those deep
brown eyes. Those that told him more than a thousand words. Those that seemed to read
every possible thought inside his head. Moving his head back the slightest, he moaned loudly
when the other hit that spot inside of him again, his lips quivering from the feeling while his
shaking thighs were in the hold of the taller. It caused goosebumps to erupt on his skin, his
big fingers having the slightest touch of coldness, that spread throughout his body.

Only a second passed by in which he wanted to close his eyes, only to suddenly see a peach
drop down and hit the smaller's nose. It wasn't a big one but it still hurt and he whined while
rubbing over the reddening spot, not quite believing that it really just happened until he heard
the other's laughter, so loud and shrill. The older man was sitting up between his legs, hands
covering his handsome face before Chanyeol leaned back down and rubbed Baekhyun's nose
carefully, a soft kiss following right after.

" Are you okay?"

" I was hit by a peach, Chanyeol-ah. This is so embarrassing."

" You look really adorable right now, with your red nose and teary eyes. I think I fell for your
charms even more," the taller replied, calming down from his laughing fit to properly talk to
the smaller and watch him blush because of his words. A beautiful pink that seemed to
darken, the more he stared and that ultimately made him move his hips again, continuing to
thrust slower into Baekhyun and feel his breathing against his face, his hand reaching down
to stroke the other's dick in time with his thrusts until he came all over his white see through
blouse.

He looked so breathtaking, coming undone and shuddering from the intensity that ran
through his body, enough reason to make Chanyeol feel like he could cum just from the view.
Something about the inexperience in his every move was adorable, and a dark part of him
wanted to completely ruin Baekhyun, in ways only he would be able to.

Breathing heavily while feeling Chanyeol chase his own orgasm, he moaned loudly at the
oversensitivity that ran through his body because every push, every pull and drag along his
tight walls was pure torture. He only stopped whining when the other came undone and
slowed down, which gave him time to let everything sink in and when it did, he could not
stop giggling like crazy, lips being claimed in butterfly kisses from the painter until he kissed
back properly, their bodies relaxing from the intense emotions.

Calming down with the taller laying on top of his smaller body, Baekhyun's eyes found the
clear blue sky and the few birds that flew over their heads. It seemed to promise freedom,
something that seemed to be closer to his opened palms, now that he was finally accepting
positive feelings in his life and his bubble was only interrupted when he felt something
around his neck, a curious hand wandering up to touch the necklace that Chanyel had put on
him secretly.

" Rosewood. I dried it and then made a necklace for you. The color accentuates your skin and
eyes...I-...I am sorry if this seems sudden o-"

" Chanyeol," Baekhyun interrupted, slender fingers still stroking over the dried petals, while
he actually tried to hold back tears. He had received gifts throughout his life, various
expensive ones, but nothing came even close to what the artist just had given him, his heart
hammering against his ribcage, begging for his feelings to be freed. He bit his lips briefly, a
small tender hand reaching out to caress the taller's cheek and stroke over it before he spoke
up once more, " This is the best thing I ever received, thank you so much. I will treasure it."

Smiling up at the other, they met in one last kiss. One that was full of things that scared both
of them and their weak hearts, one that literally took their breath away until they ended up
giggling and simply enjoying their time together because even though Baekhyun wanted this
to last forever, he knew tough times were crawling closer, something he feared so badly. It
made him dwell in their moment, appreciating the tall man and his actions, the sky only
covered in a few white clouds while his eyes closed.

This was what filled him with happiness and content, this was what he had been waiting for
and craved, not ready to let it go just yet.

__________________________________

It felt like the weather was ahead of their time and thoughts when it brought a terrible storm,
with heavy rain and thunder. The ocean was restless, while Baekhyun eyed it from his bed,
silky robe wrapped around his body, tiredness raking through it. The third week had ended in
the blink of an eye, today being Friday and for once he had slept in. It was already half past
twelve, but he wasn't excited because he knew he could not meet Chanyeol immediately.

There was noise coming from the kitchen, and he knew Jiwoo was home. The ring on his
nightstand was covered in the slightest bit of dust, feeling uncomfortable when he slipped it
over his finger and stood up to go to the other room. There he stood in a black suit, phone on
his ear before he noticed the smaller, his eyes moving over Baekhyun's body as if he was
inspecting a car only to stop at his neck.

" Bug bite?"

His way of asking was terribly cold and emotionless, making it easier for the smaller to cover
up the truth because this wasn't even close to a bite. This was a hickey he had completely
forgotten about, briefly remembering the time he and Chanyeol had made out against the
taller's car before bidding goodbye.

" The mosquitoes are bad at the moment, how was your trip?"

“ Hm. It was good, I met a lot of people and also got some new impressions. Did everything
go well with the preparations? And the portrait?” Jiwoo asked, but his eyes weren’t on
Baekhyun anymore, instead typing something on his phone while he sat down. The tall man
seemed different, not as stressed but still the same when it came to talking or caring. Those
three weeks passed by way too fast, and the younger once again realized that he did not want
to be in the same room as his fiancé.

“ The gala preparations did go well, the artists are all finished with their works and the
location is already decorated. For the portrait, Chanyeol was almost finished when I met him
last time, he said he will reveal it at the event.”

Pouring himself a glass of water, he leaned against the counter while drinking it, the coldness
raking down his throat and feeling uncomfortable for a few moments. It was also quite
refreshing, though, and it gave him enough time to look at the other a bit longer, finding his
behavior weird. He usually wasn’t someone who wrote so feverishly on his phone, but now
he almost seemed addicted, not that he cared.

“ Good, good. It will take place next week as planned, so make sure you are prepared as well.
After that we still have more than a month of time on this island, we will see if we maybe fly
back earlier.”

“ Why?” Baekhyun asked way too loudly, his voice soaked with disappointment and shock,
and he knew it was obvious when Jiwoo turned around and looked at him. How was he
supposed to cover up his real feelings at this point when he could not imagine leaving
Chanyeol anymore. Not him nor the island, nor the love that was growing. But he also knew
that he dug his own grave by acting the way he did, the other man now having stood up to
walk closer and hover above him, his fingers briefly touching the red spot on his neck.

“ Mosquitos, huh? We will leave when everything is settled and over, do you have a problem
with that? You knew from the beginning that this could happen.”

Moving away from his suffocating presence, Baekhyun wrapped his robe tighter around
himself and walked back towards the hallway, no argument laying on his tongue that
wouldn’t have sounded like he wanted to stay because of someone else. It was embarrassing
to some extent, but on the other hand, he always felt like this when he was together with
Jiwoo.

The simple knowledge of this week probably being the last on this island, made his heart race
like crazy but this time not from excitement. There were tears in his eyes that were falling
onto his soft cheeks the more he thought about it, glad when he finally closed the bedroom
door behind himself and laid down on his bed. Frustration was the leading emotion but also
sadness. He had absolutely no clue on what he should and wanted to do, to prevent this thing
between Chanyeol and him to end. He couldn’t even bear the thought of leaving the tall man
and probably never seeing him again.

Realizing that his thoughts were spiraling badly, he stood up and got dressed in a pullover
and jeans, fearing that a shirt would be too cold if it started to rain. The sneakers at the door
were what he chose to put on his feet and before talking to his fiancé once more, he left,
basically running towards the beach, far away from their rented apartment. There weren’t a
lot of people due to the storm, and at one point, he just dropped down into the sand, knees
immediately moving up so he could lay his head on them.
How dearly he would have loved to have someone to talk to, a friend or his mother, but both
things were something he neither had nor had good relation to. There was this massive need
to scream his lungs out from the stress that had built up, the knowledge of the mess he had
slid into together with the painter, and not that he felt bad about it because he didn’t. It was
the first thing in his life he felt like he did right, but it was terrifying to know that there could
be an end to it.

Gasping when a raindrop hit his brown hair, he looked up and was met with more and more,
the cold water mixing with the salty tears on his cheeks until it started to rush down heavier.
The ocean was loudly crashing against the shore while the clouds now looked like they were
hiding the world’s secrets behind them, darkness covering the island like the night. Baekhyun
felt how his clothes were soaking through slowly, but he couldn’t have cared less. Still, he
stood up and continued to walk, too scared of the thunder that came closer.

His feet carried him to Chanyeol’s apartment, not even knowing if he was home, but when he
saw the lights being turned on in the kitchen, he never ran faster, lips quivering so heavily
that his teeth chattered, eyes filling with new tears. The brown haired man was not sure what
he was doing but seeing the door being opened and witnessing the other’s worried gaze, he
simply ran into his arms and hugged him, not caring about the fact that he was completely
wet.

The tall man was confused for a brief second, but when he felt the hot tears against his chest,
he did not ask and simply closed the door to carefully walk back a bit, warm hands
wandering over Baekhyun’s wet pullover to stroke over it in calm circles. There wasn’t much
he could do, but he knew something was wrong, “ Do you want to tell me what made you this
sad? Do I have to punch someone?”

The question was cute and ridiculous at the same time, and it actually made the smaller laugh
briefly before he shook his head, face rubbing against the painter’s chest and then his eyes
looked up, meeting the other’s. The warmth that he saw was nothing in comparison to earlier,
so much understanding and worry reflected in the brown orbs that it made him feel even
worse about the whole situation.

“...Jiwoo is back.”

“ I see…" Chanyeol replied, not surprised at his words because it had to happen at some
point, but also ending up being disappointed that their time together was limited once more.
They both knew what they got themselves into yet here they were, acting like kids that just
lost their favorite toy.

"...Do you want to see your portrait? Would that lift your mood a little? I finished it this
morning."

Quietly listening to the older man’s heartbeat for a moment, Baekhyun sniffed his nose and
gently pulled away from their hug, a small sorry leaving his lips when he saw how wet his
shirt was because of him. Now that he was here, he did not even know what to say or how to
word what was on his mind, eyes hurting so much from the tears that he rubbed over them to
ease the pain.
He could see how excited the artist seemed to be, how badly he wanted to make him feel
better, and he simply could not bring himself to spill the truth that was pulling on his
heartstrings, instead nodding his head and taking Chanyeol’s hand into his own.

“ Yes please. Show me.“

Now in a change of clothes, or to be exact, wrapped in one of the tall man’s shirts, which
raked down to his thighs, he stood in the room where Chanyeol had placed the portrait, eyes
glued to the literal art that seemed to represent him. The thing was, he never looked that
intensely at himself, ending up being surprised at every detail that seemed to be on his face
and back. There were moles, a small crease right beside his lips, the shape of them reminding
him of petals. His eyes looked like golden chocolate and his hair seemed so soft.

“ So this is the way you see me?”

“ No and yes, this is the way you look, Baekhyun-ah. When I told you that you’re beautiful, I
meant it,” Chanyeol answered, hand grazing over the painting to feel the slight bumps of the
paint before he noticed the soft hiccups behind him. Eyes immediately found the smaller’s
and saw that he was about to cry again, long legs carrying him over to stroke his hot cheeks,
“ No crying okay? Your eyes are so swollen already.”

Chuckling at his words and the fact that he worried so much, Baekhyun leaned up to kiss the
taller’s jaw, stubble tickling his lips. He knew Jiwoo would question the pose he was doing
on the drawing, his naked back exposed, not telling if it was the same further down, but for
now, he did not care one bit. His eyes did not leave the painting while they swayed from side
to side for a while, Chanyeol humming a melody into his ear and making him forget his
worries that threatened to eat him up.

There was still time, he could tell the taller about it some other day. Enjoying their time
together and knowing that he had to also talk about this growing feeling inside his chest at
one point, he closed his eyes and nuzzled back into the other’s chest, trying to think about
what he was having right in that moment and what he was allowed to experience, including
the soft touches from Chanyeol, his plump lips against his head and most importantly, his
hand intertwined with his own, telling him that everything would be fine, somehow.

_______________

It was Saturday afternoon when Jiwoo almost crashed into Baekhyun’s bedroom, not
knocking or indicating that he would enter while the smaller sat on his bed, about to get
changed into something comfortable for the evening. Today he had planned to watch a movie
and sleep early because staying up and knowing he couldn't just go to Chanyeol made him
sad.

That plan seemed even more far off now.

" Are you insane? Could you at least knock?"

" Yeah, but I didn't, so get over it. I want you to dress properly, doll up. We have a meeting
with the heads of the gala today. I just arranged it," Jiwoo replied and disappeared as fast as
he had appeared, leaving the smaller and his anger alone.

Meetings like those were the worst because his sole purpose would be to look good and show
just how lucky the taller one had been, to have someone like Baekhyun as his fiancé. There
was literally no other reason because he had no say in his work, and he was absolutely not
interested.

Sighing loudly and almost throwing the remote against the wall, he collected himself and
reached for the necklace Chanyeol had gifted him, the flower looking so delicate but yet
beautiful and reminding him of the other’s sweet words. The moment it laid against his chest,
he immediately felt better, eyes searching for a fitting outfit and choosing black pants and a
blue long sleeved shirt as well as a long leather coat.

He was used to 'doll up', it was almost like a routine at this point, and it honestly was quite
sad. Makeup made him feel good about the mask he always put on, hiding his true self and
emotions. He started to like it less, though, especially because he knew Chanyeol adored him
regardless. It was crazy how he connected every random thought to the older man, and he
knew he was into this way too deep.

The restaurant they met the other managers and organizers in was huge, nothing like the
small one Chanyeol had introduced him to, and suddenly, all that glitter and glory was so
unapproachable and weird. There were a lot of waiters who came over at the same time to
take their coats and drink orders, but Jiwoo was way faster in speaking and ordered for them
two, eyes finding the necklace on Baekhyun's neck.

" I told you to doll up and not wear a cheap ass necklace."

" You can go fuck yourself if you are annoyed by this, be glad I even tagged along," he
replied, sassy as ever before walking over to the table to shake the other men's hands. He
wasn't supposed to do anything special, which is why he sat down and eyed his surroundings,
the big chandelier over them looking mesmerizing and probably being the best thing about
this evening including the food.

Because while they started talking about business, numbers and calculations, he ate the pasta
they served, sweet memories of him and Chanyeol making some by scratch in his head. That
moment of realization also forced him to admit that the food wasn't that good, and he could
not avoid smiling to himself, gaining the attention of one of the business men.

" Is the food that good? You seem to enjoy it quite a lot."

The small spark of a mocking undertone confused Baekhyun and before he could reply,
Jiwoo had touched his hand. A silent way of telling him to keep it quiet, " Don't eat too
much, we don't want your pretty curves to disappear just because you enjoyed the pasta a bit
too much."
His laughter was evil, the joined chuckling even worse. He had been humiliated before. Sadly
enough, he was used to it when it came from his fiancé, but attacking his weight was a dirty
turn of events. Baekhyun always had some problems with gaining and losing weight, his
body accustomed to the food he ate and that also made him think about the painter, to no
surprise, remembering how he had kissed every part of his body, appreciating him the way he
looked, instead of saying what would be better.

The difference was astronomical because Chanyeol was a man while those people were boys.
And he sincerely tried to not let it get to him, instead smiling and nodding awkwardly and
calling the waiter for another glass of wine. That was when he overheard their conversation,
as if he wasn't sitting right beside them.

" Your fiancé sure is gorgeous. You're lucky, Mr. Kim."

" He really is, huh? But you know what…" he said, a rotten grin on his face while he leaned
over the table, hand doing a certain movement before he continued his ridiculously obvious
self-promotion, " All that beauty does not make up for the missing intelligence."

It hurt.

That one seriously hurt because even though Jiwoo was an asshole and would always be one,
he knew how smart Baekhyun was and how talented. He knew about his successful books,
and he knew about the tons of money he had earned through them. It felt like his fiancé was
angry or agitated to the say the least because this sort of mockery was new. Gently dabbing
the corners of his mouth, the smaller stood up with shaking hands, a forced tense smile on his
face while he looked at all of them, avoiding his fiancé's eyes.

" I will have to excuse myself for the restroom real quick."

Once out of sight, he practically ran to the toilets, the door banging closed behind him before
he leaned over the sink to calm his breathing. He had kept up with this shit for years, the
humiliating, the small amount of actual care, so why was it such a huge problem now?

It really made him wonder what changed him and his attitude, the feeling he had allowed
inside of his heart and the dreams he was now thinking off while the tears were streaming
down his pretty face. His cheeks hurt from the warmth of them, and his eyes were still a bit
swollen from all the crying he did, that was when he stared at his reflection in the mirror.
Where was this beauty everyone talked about, where was the thing that made him special?

Reaching for some of the paper, he wet it and rubbed it over his face, removing and smearing
the makeup all over his reddening skin until he felt better about it. Until the weight was gone.
His hands were pressing against the sides of the sink, turning his skin white before he noticed
the necklace dangling over it and that was also the moment it clicked.

Of course.

Chanyeol was the one who changed him and made him feel like a good person. He was the
one who turned his life upside down and showed him how he deserved to be treated,
overshadowing the behavior of people like Jiwoo. And the taller man also started to be the
reason for his change of heart, for no longer wanting to follow his parents advice or a
loveless engagement.

While that thought had worried him days ago, it was now almost a determined decision, his
heart beating frantically when thinking about the older man and the things they would be able
to do. He just had to pull through for a bit longer, finish the gala and celebrate the man he
truly cared for and then end everything that had dragged him down half of his life.

Now grinning at this reflection and ignoring the tear stains on his blouse, he reached for the
necklace and gave the flower a careful kiss, thumb stroking over the petals before he walked
back out, confidence in every step he took. The men at the table were all looking at him in
both confusion and shock and Jiwoo? Well, he seemed angry and Baekhyun loved that.

" I hope everything will go well tonight, but I have to excuse myself for today. You certainly
don't want someone around that lacks brain cells, right? It would drag the overall IQ of this
table."

Grabbing his coat and letting one of the waiters help him putting it on, he bowed once and
then walked back outside, his shoes clacking against the asphalt while he tried his hardest to
hold back his laughter, just witnessing that the others’ still looked at him instead of talking
and he couldn't have cared less about what he just did.

Not when everything finally seemed to make sense, fell in place and calmed his heart. Those
weeks of confusion felt like they were over, and he simply could not wait to completely break
free from this hell hole of a life, eyes looking forward, just like his thoughts.

Staring up at the sky and watching how the thick clouds were slowly fading into the
darkness, to make room for several stars, he took a deep breath. One that set his lungs alive
and freed his mind from continuing worries. The leather coat was wrapped around his waist
tightly while his hands stretched up over his head, relaxing his muscles and embracing this
new feeling of freedom.

It was sad to admit, but this was truly the first time he felt like his life was in the palm of his
own hands and not in those of others. It felt like he was allowed to dream and to decide what
was good for him, who he wanted to trust and who he wanted to love.

Love.

That made him smile and blush like a freshly picked strawberry. He remembered those times
he had only written about it, his research consisting of books and movies, and not from his
own experience. It had felt like it was a feeling that actually did not exist, but now that his
heart was so warm and beat so fast he knew he was wrong.

Baekhyun knew that what he felt for Chanyeol was more than just a mere crush, ever since he
had been twirled through the air, the taller’s hands holding his waist before they kissed and
laughed. It was funny how it actually was just a small part of the whole picture, but it was the
one thing that made him realize that this was love .
Absentmindedly touching his lips, there was this slight buzz that made him grin softly, his
apartment being in sight after what felt like only mere minutes. He was craving a kiss, but he
wanted the next one to be special, and he knew he also wanted it to be at the gala, so he held
himself back. Instead of that, he fell down on his bed to relax, slipping the ring off of his
finger and laying it on the nightstand, while his free hand held the necklace tightly, telling
him that everything would fall into place at one point.

Probably sooner than later and he absolutely could not wait for it.

For that change he deserved.

____________

There was gold everywhere. The lights, the curtains, the carpets as well as the frames of the
paintings. Baekhyun had put a lot of thought into the decoration and theme, and it turned out
to be fantastic because while passing by the place of the gala, he had caught a glimpse of
everything, the blouse he was supposed to wear, inside his hands.

He had only been in contact with Chanyeol over the phone and that during the night because
the taller was busy with preparing his paintings and everything else. It had been some lonely
days, but he still hoped for good times to come, a letter with the words he wanted to say
laying on his nightstand. The younger man was terribly nervous, scared, and terrified. Every
bad emotion possible, but those things he had written down came from his heart, and they
were pure.

Now that the event was only mere hours away, he chose to prepare for it as well, wanting to
look absolutely stunning but only for one single person. The makeup he had chosen was
golden and brown, accentuating his dark eyes, while there was red lip balm as a contrast. Hair
being the usual soft mess, his outfit consisted of black leather pants which were skin tight, a
white blouse with equally golden embroidery on the arms and a dark belt.

Baekhyun looked not only expensive but absolutely gorgeous when he stood in front of the
mirror, the necklace Chanyeol had gifted him around his neck, the silver ring from Jiwoo on
his slender hand, hidden behind his back. It had no meaning, definitely not today, and it was
quickly forgotten when he reached for his black fake fur coat, only to end up standing in front
of his fiancé.

The tall man was wearing a black suit like always, his blonde hair not gelled back for once
and not falling into his face. But all that beauty would have never been able to make up for
the rotten character that bloomed within his chest. His eyes were wandering over Baekhyun’s
body once, twice and a third time before he approved it with a hum, a bitter laugh slipping
from the smaller's lips when he poured himself a glass of wine.

" What? Am I not dolled up enough for you?"

" You know I'm still angry at the stunt you pulled at the restaurant, at least behave yourself
today. It's gonna be the last event on this goddamn island," Jiwoo snarled, the wristwatch in
his hands reflecting the light from the kitchen. It was a silver Rolex, a gift from Baekhyun's
father and just a mere sign of appreciation. What kind of appreciation? Baekhyun had a
guess.

Money played a huge role, it always had, and Jiwoo was addicted to it. To some extent it was
disgusting because his blinded eyes saw nothing else but the gross pieces of paper. There had
not been a single moment in which the smaller had felt like his fiancé wasn't superficial and
that alone was terribly sad.

" Can we leave then? Or do you need to check yourself in the mirror for the sixth time?"
Baekhyun asked, his eyes focused on his nails before he heard the taller's loud groan, making
it obvious that he was annoyed. They always fought and especially over stupid things like
this, but this time it was completely different because the smaller was determined to turn his
life around, this evening being the most important one of his young life.

The night air was as fresh as polar wind, the slight coldness making goosebumps appear over
the exposed parts of skin while Jiwoo walked ahead. Cars were parked everywhere, just like
the first event they had attended on this island, but now it seemed more important especially
because Baekhyun knew it could change Chanyeol's life.

Smiling to himself, he snaked his hand through his fiancé's arm, when he offered it, and
stepped inside the huge hall, the gold decoration mesmerizing and beautiful. He did a great
job in organizing everything and he, for once, was proud of his own work. Looking around to
maybe see some familiar faces, he indeed was surprised when someone came running
towards him, wrapping Baekhyun into a tight hug.

" Baek, thank you again for this opportunity. "

It was Kyungsoo, clad in a grey suit and his hair gelled backwards, his perfume invading the
other's nostrils to the point he felt intoxicated. His words, though, made him smile,
reminiscing the secret he had kept hidden from everyone, even from Chanyeol.

It happened during the second week of Baekhyun being alone on the island when an idea had
hit him. He had sat on his bed, fingers wrapped around a hot cup of tea while his eyes were
focused on the movie he was absentmindedly watching, tongue clicking suddenly before he
had picked up his phone.

Saved in his contacts, was the number of Jongin as well Kyungsoo's, both the singers having
had given him those when he already had been too tipsy to recall. A band had been
something Jiwoo had not thought of, which ultimately meant it was his chance to support
people he truly liked.

And he hadn't thought twice when he had got up and walked into town, the message he had
sent burning into the display of his phone, while his eyes had looked around until they had
focused on both men, their hands entangled.

" What a surprise, Baekhyun-ah. Say, is everything okay? You sounded so out of breath?"
Kyungsoo had asked, his big eyes showing worry before Baekhyun had shook his head, a big
smile displayed on his face.

" Everything is more than fine, I would like to ask you two for a favor."

Eyeing Jiwoo, who seemed confused, Baekhyun stroked one of his tender hands over the
other's back and then nodded his head, also watching Jongin walk over. They both looked so
good in their matching suits, their smiles more rewarding than any amount of money on this
planet. He had learned to treasure the small moments and this was definitely one of those.

" Please don't thank me, I'm doing this because you two deserve it. Just know that I didn't tell
Chanyeol about this at all. He will certainly be surprised."

Giggling softly, he gazed behind the two to see their instruments and the band, who seemed
to prepare everything, making him touch both of their shoulders and squeezing them gently.

Never before had he met such good souls, their behavior much more lovable than that of
people who stuck around him for years, and that was also the one reason he chose to support
them. To push their talent.

" You can start playing whenever, but the best would be if you do it before it gets too
crowded, so you can measure how loud you need to sing. I will visit you from time to time,
with food and drinks."

Waving his hand briefly when both left again, he felt like Jiwoo was boring holes into his
back, and it was tiring. Turning around to see him with two glasses of champagne, he reached
for one and drank it in one go, the alcohol burning down his throat like liquid fire. It felt
good, though, because it muted the noise of the room for a while, eyes tingling from the
many voices.

" Don't drink too much again, it's embarrassing. "

" Oh is it? I'm sorry, but for me, it's the only thing that makes it possible to breathe in a room
full of superficial interest and lies. And especially a room where you are," Baekhyun replied,
bathing in the poisonous look that his fiancé shot his way. He wasn't here to play their stupid
game tonight, he was here for more important reasons, and he wanted to shove that down his
throat with every situation possible.

" Huh. Well, I will engage in some important conversations throughout the evening, make
sure to not mess anything up. I will keep an eye on you."

" Uhhh, scary. Go take care of those, I will be in the gallery."

The gala was divided into two parts, one being the main hall with food, drinks and the band,
the other one being the gallery with every painting they wanted displayed for the night.
Baekhyun felt more comfortable when it was quiet, which is why he sat down on the first
bench he saw, only realizing seconds later that it was right in front of his self portrait. The
picture was framed golden and it took his breath away once more, when he let it sink in that
Chanyeol drew this.

He usually avoided his own face and the fact that everyone called him beautiful, but those
weeks in Italy and the time he had spent with the taller, taught him how to love himself and
how to appreciate that he indeed was as pretty as the person in the painting.

Now the only thing he had to do and wanted to do was to wait. Wait for the older man to
show up, witness his happiness and hopefully turn the night into one he never wanted to
forget. It was all still written in the depth of stars, but he felt like he was closer than ever,
fingers grazing against the brightness of their dust. It made him smile and lean back against
the wall, hands tapping against the fabric of his coat in hopes the time would pass by faster
this way.

Many guests found their way to the gallery a bit later than he did, and it was so satisfying to
see them admire Chanyeol's works. Not that he was biased, but it felt good knowing that they
appreciated his talent. Gazing at his own portrait more than once and not stopping to be
mesmerized about every stroke of paint and every detail that laid upon his face, he loved to
remember the sour grin on Jiwoo's face when he had first seen it.

It was only the day before this one, to inspect the location and check if everything was going
well. Baekhyun had enjoyed it to see that the taller was satisfied with the picture, but
simultaneously had struggled so much to not question more. Because the pose he was in, the
exposed part of his back and also the smile on the younger's face, were all things Jiwoo had
never seen before.

Briefly looking at his nails, his eyes wandered back towards the main hall, the mass of people
and laughter making his ears hurt and that also was when he saw him . No second thought
rushed through his head, before he got up and literally ran through the crowd, the biggest
smile plastered on his petal shaped lips.

The first thing he noticed was the amount of gold, and it honestly made him smile so tenderly
that some of the people he passed by wondered what could make someone this happy. For
Chanyeol, it was easy to explain because everything about this event just screamed
Baekhyun.

Looking down at himself and probably the most expensive suit he had ever bought, his thick
fingers grazed over the buttons of the jackett, one of them having a rosewood flower
engraved. It was funny how something this small suddenly had such a big meaning for him,
and he sincerely hoped he would be able to tell Baekhyun about it soon.

About the thing he was certain of now, finally, after what felt like ages. And also about the
secret behind the necklace, which he had kept hidden till now.

His black long hair was braided and pinned up like a circle at the back of his head, everything
reminding him of the one person he was addicted to, like bees were to flowers. An intense
comparison but sometimes breathing was just easier when he was together with the other.
Finally stepping inside and being surrounded by people he had never met, his eyes seeked for
him, but instead of that he heard a familiar tune, head whipping around towards the band that
played, only to realize them being his friends. There wasn't a word that could have described
how he felt in that moment, knowing Baekhyun had organized this.

Baekhyun . The name made his body tingle and his eyes subconsciously seek for the smaller's
presence and as if it was destined, the smaller was running towards him the moment he laid
eyes on his face. Trying to hold back the mass of emotions that ran through his body, he
simply smiled, his hand reaching out to touch the other's secretly, in hopes no one else would
see it and it felt good.

The warmth of both of them shared in a space that felt suffocating.

" Hi."

" Hey."

It made Baekhyun giggle, that brief high laughter which set Chanyeol's heart on fire each
time he heard it. They wanted to do more than this, obviously, but they couldn't, and it
seemed to be a shared struggle. Looking up to meet the taller's eyes, he admired the way he
had dressed, satisfied hum leaving his tender mouth.

" You look great, Chanyeol-ah. So handsome."

" And you look absolutely stunning, everyone else seems to think the same," Chanyeol
replied, having noticed the many eyes that had followed the smaller's presence, and he had to
admit, it made him the least bit jealous. Not that he needed to feel like that because after all,
it seemed like he was the owner of Baekhyun's heart.

" Do they? I only care about one person's opinion, though."

He smiled. A soft small grin that was plastered over his lips, when he looked up at Chanyeol,
knowing he understood his words quite well. There was no one else he would have wanted to
impress but the taller, the man he cared for and the man that had his heart in a tight hold since
day one.

The moment he wanted to step closer, Baekhyun noticed Jiwoo's eyes on them and he also,
sadly enough, saw that he was walking over, threatening to ruin their conversation. So before
that could happen, he squeezed the taller's hand one last time, speaking a promise into
existence that only them two understood and then distanced himself once more.

" I will see you soon, okay? Just know, I'm so proud of you, Chanyeol-ah. "

It meant the world to him. No, more than that, but there wasn't time to continue talking when
Jiwoo crossed his way and suddenly stood in front of him, the smile on his flat lips strained.

"Chanyeol, I've been waiting for you. Follow me."

Nodding his head, he did as he was told, soon having a glass of champagne clutched within
his palm, the noises tuning out the more they walked towards the big terrace. Watching the
other light a cigarette, he kept his distance because he couldn't stand the smell of it, and it
made Jiwoo laugh, arms leaning back against the railing. There were unspoken emotions
reflecting in his eyes, and Chanyeol could not unravel one of them.

" You did an amazing job of painting my fiancé. I saw the painting earlier, it's stunning, and it
will be good for publicity because people are already talking about it."

" Thank you, Mr. Kim. I really gave it my all, but I have to be honest and say that Baekhyun
was a good model as well, really calm and quiet," Chanyeol replied, trying to keep down the
amount of compliments he actually wanted to let his lips spill.

There was a moment of silence, one that felt suffocating when Jiwoo breathed out a huge
cloud of smoke, his fingers playing with his wristwatch for a second. It was impossible to
even know what was going through his head because the taller simply couldn't read him.
Briefly looking up to the sky, the stars were brighter than ever, and it reminded him of the
time Baekhyun had said one of them was his father.

He didn't intend to smile, but he simply had to because it made his heart squeeze with so
much love and adoration, hands itching to call the smaller and ask where he was hiding, but
he didn't. Not when his sponsor was now standing almost in front of him.

" I want to offer you something, Chanyeol. A co-founder of a sub-company that works with
the Louvre, has contacted me. They are heavily interested in your works, how does that
sound?"

Chanyeol was conflicted but also, his heart was hammering against his chest so hard, that he
feared it would break free any second. Did he hear that correctly? The Louvre?

He wanted to jump around in happiness, scream into the air how thankful he actually was, but
he composed himself and instead cleared his throat, eyes focused on the other man right in
front of him.

Time was what he truly needed right now, to think about it properly and let it settle in, but he
nevertheless reached his hand out to shake his sponsor's, his lips forming a friendly smile, "
That sounds amazing. Is it possible for me to think about it some more? I will come see you
soon with a final decision, but I am more than willing to take this next step."

" Of course. However our business here in Italy is done, so we will be leaving at noon
tomorrow, but I already told the co-founder to contact you, probably next week so you have
enough time for it. I’m sure Baekhyun told you, though?"

It felt like the weight of the world dropped onto his shoulders because no, he absolutely had
no plan that Baekhyun would be gone and out of reach in only a few hours. Trying to not
look as affected as he actually was, he cleared his throat, head hurting from the intense
pressure of emotions that wanted to break free.

“ No, he didn’t tell me. "

" Hm, how fitting because this brings me to the next thing I want to talk to you about. He
played you as well, didn't he?"

From one second to the other his heart dropped to his feet, out of pure confusion and fear, so
much fear. He was scared that Jiwoo found out about them, he was terrified that he just
played himself but most significantly, he was anxious about what Jiwoo wanted to tell him,
his body so tense that his muscles started to hurt.

" Excuse me?"

" Baekhyun. I'm not stupid, I know you fucked him."

Swallowing down so hard that his throat hurt, his lips searched for the words he wanted and
needed to get out, but instead of that he looked pathetically frozen, eyes glued to the other
man who seemed way too relaxed for this type of conversation.

" I-"

" It's okay. I'm sure he told you as well that it was his first time?" Jiwoo asked, another
cigarette dangling between his long fingers, that he lightened up and his words left a sour
aftertaste, because yes, Baekhyun did. The moments they had shared were rushing in front of
his eyes like a train, head hurting from all the information he had to take in and also the fact
that he did not know what was true and what wasn't.

His hands were in tight fists beside his legs, ears briefly picking up the music from inside and
it couldn't be, it just couldn't, right?

"…He did."

Humming under his breath, Jiwoo stayed quiet and instead finished the third cigarette for that
evening, the glint in his eyes never really disappearing while he knew that he had Chanyeol
wrapped around his finger. It was like a walk on a wire and he had the power to make it snap.

" He told me that as well and probably all the other men he fucked. Baekhyun likes money,
you know? He loves it, so it surprised me to find out that he seeked your embrace. Maybe for
your looks ? Or maybe because he was bored, who knows."

" I'm sorry, I-I can't seem to follow along," Chanyeol breathed out, voice shaky from the
sudden pain in his chest. It felt like his heart was being tugged around, like a ball which was
thrown against walls out of fun. There wasn't even space for rational thoughts when the bad
ones overshadowed his mind.

He had known Jiwoo for far longer than he had known Baekhyun, but that didn't ultimately
mean he could trust him. He and the smaller had shared so many secrets that it seemed unreal
to think that this was all fake and that ultimately led his thoughts to the necklace and the
small message he had left within its petals.

There was no regret, just worry to be the one ending up as the clown of this whole farce.
Rubbing his temples, he saw Jiwoo from the corner of his eyes, pressing out the cigarette and
walking closer, his warm hand on Chanyeol’s shoulder.

" I'm not angry, but you should stop meeting him if you want me to push your career. He had
you wrapped around his little finger, and he had fun doing it. Don't think too hard about it
and decide your future path. You have my number. Us leaving should make it easier for you
both, right?"

Now alone on that endless terrace, there were some people far off in the left corner, clad in
expensive dresses and suits. Their accessories glistened just like Baekhyun’s and that was
when he realized he truly didn't fit into this world that was ruled by money and status. That
was the moment he recognized himself as the fool of this whole situation, a dark chuckle
slipping from his plump lips before he rushed back inside, the sound of the band numbing his
ears.

There he saw the man he yearned for, laughing and talking to guests that equally mirrored his
expensive attitude and clothes, and it just then hit him, that he was so out of his reach. A
whole other level of society. And he wasn't even sure if he would ever want that anyway.
Betrayal raked through his veins, while his brain did not even properly wrap around the fact
that this seemed to be all just a huge lie.

The gala seemed to go the way Baekhyun had wanted it to because most of the attention was
on the band and the paintings, the guests enjoying every bit of it. Nevertheless, it felt like
hours had passed by while he waited, his hands shaking from excitement of wanting to see
Chanyeol again.

Mere minutes laid between the last time they had seen each other and never before had he
been more sure about what he wanted to say, what he wanted to do. At one point, he had
walked back into the main hall to pick up another glass of champagne and that was when he
saw the tall man with Jiwoo, his fiancé tapping his shoulder. It looked like a normal
conversation, but then Chanyeol rushed back outside and his senses told him it wasn't
because of something good.

However, the happiness of seeing him, of being in the same place as the one he loved after
having been separated, was way bigger, and it left him to rush outside as well, small feet
tapping across the white marble floor until he stood on top of the stairs, Chanyeol at the
bottom. His heart was racing so fast that he feared it to take over for a second, hands itching
to reach out.

" Chanyeol-ah, I've been looking for you."

Smiling softly when the tall man turned around, he skipped down the stairs with light steps,
his coat elegantly moving with the fresh air that surrounded them. And when he stood in
front of the painter, able to see every mole on his beautiful face, he knew he wanted to spill
everything, he wanted him to finally know what was going on inside his head.

His slender fingers wandered inside his pocket, the letter he had brought along held tightly
between his palm because he was nervous and he was scared. The spiraling thoughts of every
scenario possible, making his hands shake, but he decided to swallow everything down, eyes
brave while they stared into Chanyeol's big brown ones.

And that was when he knew he wanted him, only him in every way possible.

" Chanyeol, I-...I need to tell yo-"

" Is it true?"

Blinking his eyes in confusion, he felt like his throat dried out from one moment to the other,
lips awkwardly moving against each other while he stared at the other man. It was suddenly
impossible for Baekhyun to see through Chanyeol's behavior, his usually obvious feelings
nowhere on sight.

It was scary and he knew his lips were quivering when he spoke up again.

" What do you mean? I don't understand. "

The older man seemed to hold so much inside that wanted to break free, his warm eyes so
cold that it seemed like a fever dream, when they once looked at him so tenderly. His body
was not even coming closer, no touch of his hands, no kiss of his lips. It was just them and
those that walked up the stairs, the ocean splashing quietly in the distance. And in that
moment the silence seemed to be louder than anything else.

" You lied to me, didn't you? Did any of those things we did, even mean the slightest bit to
you? Anything?”

"What? W-wait, I don't think I get what you mean," Baekhyun stammered, hand reaching out
to touch Chanyeol's, only for it to be gently refused. And that hurt because the mess
unfolding in front of him didn't make sense at all. The letter inside his pocket suddenly
seemed so unimportant because he literally had no clue where this conversation was going.
The only thing he knew was that this was not what he wanted.

" Chanyeol-ah...don't tell me you believe this? What did he tell you? What did Jiwoo tell y-
you?"

His whole body was shaking so bad that it was hard to form a proper sentence, his eyes not
leaving Chanyeol's face even once because he wanted to understand where they had gone
wrong. Where he had gone wrong. All he could think about was his fiancé and the lies he
seemingly had created.

Blinking away the tears, they rolled down his rosy cheeks and dropped onto the fur lining his
coat, feet carrying him the tiniest bit closer to the taller, who seemed to avoid every stare,
glance and attempt of seeing what was going on inside his heart.

" I-It's not true, Chanyeol, I-l-"

" Stop. I can't do this right now, everything is a mess...I need time for myself. "
Sobbing loudly, Baekhyun tried to hold back the noises because he knew he wasn't making
the situation any better. Something seemed to have gone horribly wrong, and he simply did
not know how to stop the negativity. Chanyeol was rubbing his temples, his own eyes wet
with unshed tears when he took a step back and then another.

They had closed the distance between them over the past few weeks and had even walked
into uncharted territories together, his hand now clutching his coat and his smile briefly
coming back at the thought of finding peace and freedom for the first time, but it had been
crushed, in the span of a few moments.

No matter how badly he wanted to reach out and just pull the older man into a hug, he
couldn't and it hurt so, so much. Sniffing his nose he watched him step further and further
away from Baekhyun, the other's expression showing pain, he just knew he was at fault for it.

" P-please, believe me…"

" You should go back inside, Jiwoo is waiting for you, Baekhyun. "

Hiccuping at his reply, the smaller shook his head because that was the last thing he wanted,
the last thing he needed. On the other hand, he could see that discussing this situation would
lead to nowhere, at least not right now. He wanted to make sense of his words, wanted to
know what had happened between him and his fiancé, but he didn't want to force it out of
him.

" Chanyeol-ah, this is exactly what he wants…please don't do this to me. Don’t you trust
me?"

The pain was almost unbearable when he witnessed the other moving further and further
away, his shadow disappearing into the depth of the night, while Baekhyun continued to
stand on the stairs, his whole body shaking from the amount of tears that ran down his face
and the pain in his throat growing with every sob.

But from one second to the other, he ran down the rest of the stairs, feet almost tripping over
each other only to sling his body around the taller's broad back, squeezing so tightly that it
gave him the opportunity to slip his letter inside his pocket, knowing he would notice it.

He was quiet because he was sure the hug told more than a thousand words, and that was
when he let him go again, watching him leave for real this time, his voice yelling into the
cold air.

“ If you feel ready to trust me , read it.”

It took all his composure to dry his tears instead of drowning in them, his fur coat tightly
wrapped around his body as he walked back inside with only one goal on his mind.

Jiwoo.

Seeing the older man talking to some woman, intensely at that, he rushed over and pushed
between them, not caring about the attention suddenly being on him when he pushed against
his fiancé's chest, " What did you do? What did you tell him?"

“ Easy there baby , did you have a bit too much to drink again?” he snarled, his eyes trying to
drown Baekhyun with how rotten his soul actually was. But he had to compose himself, at
least in front of the guests, hands gripping his fiancé’s shirt tightly between his dainty fingers.

" You know exactly what I'm talking about."

Faced with his fading grin, Baekhyun ended up being dragged to the terrace, big doors closed
behind them. It was quiet except his heavy breathing and the chattering of his teeth. Jiwoo
looked way too smug while leaning against the railing, and it angered the smaller a whole lot
more.

" Listen, I only offered him an opportunity. It's not my fault that he seems to like his career
more than the truth."

" W-What? Opportunity? You’re making no sense. I just want to know why...why he looked
at me with so much hurt in his eyes," Baekhyun replied, voice scratchy from the tears while
his lips quivered heavily. At this point, the whole situation did not even make sense anymore,
and he absolutely hated that he seemed more confused than at the start of all this.

" Oh Baekhyun, I know you fucked him, and I know you like him. You tried so hard to hide
it, but you can't do this to us, to our image, you know that right? I just wanted to know how
sincere he is about you and turns out, he likes money and his career more than what you two
seemingly shared. "

" Chanyeol isn’t like that, he would not do that..."

He wasn't even scared anymore that the truth had been revealed earlier than he had planned.
Baekhyun couldn't have cared less when there was nothing but hate for the other man in front
of him, but he also was terrified of his words and he dreaded what was about to happen.

" I offered him the opportunity for publicity around the world, his paintings to be displayed in
places like the Louvre. Turns out he yearns for success, and I can't even be angry at him for
that. I might have also added a little something about you not being as innocent as you seem
to be, to test him and let's be honest, you are an attention whore for everyone but me. It was
easy this time."

It felt as if his heart was breaking into million pieces at once. Baekhyun knew he could not
believe whatever Jiwoo told him, but it made sense. Chanyeol’s behavior had been weird and
distant, however it didn't explain the fact that the taller was the most honest and down to
earth person, who would have never chosen career over love.

But once again, the smaller's trust grew weaker, the space he had opened up inside his heart
closing once more. What was he supposed to believe? What was he supposed to do?

" You’re disgusting for playing this sick game of yours. He would never choose money over
me...he wouldn't. "
" It doesn't change the fact that he betrayed your trust, though. Seems like he ate it all up".

Once.

Twice.

And a third time.

As if he was stabbed right into the chest with his insecurities dangling right on top of the
dagger. The hopelessness inside his heart seemed to grow stronger the more he stared at
Jiwoo and his mean grin, and it ultimately made him reach for the door handle, wanting to
leave.

" Am I allowed to talk now? Your whole little drama overshadowed the actual news I needed
to tell you. Your parents want you back home because they want to talk to us. There are no
more days to waste on this island, the event is over and so is our work here."

“ No, I will not leave him like this-”

“ Enough, Baekhyun, stop acting like a spoiled brat. We are leaving tomorrow at noon, and
we will be going home. Stop arguing when you know that the situation itself is hopeless
anyway.”

It was the last bit of self control that kept him from jumping at the taller, to instead quietly
sob to himself. There was confusion inside his heart, hope but also fear. The situation with
Chanyeol was momentarily forgotten because he wondered if his parents were okay, and if he
had to be scared for a much more terrible reason. Knowing they wanted to talk, it usually
meant they had plans and he was not looking forward to that.

Baekhyun’s hands were shaking heavily, because not only did he not know if he could trust
Jiwoo’s words, but he also was filled with worry. One that started to swallow him whole, the
more he thought about the possibility of having lost what he and Chanyeol had. On top of
that, flying back stressed him out. Yes, he loved his parents, but was he really ready to fly
back and fall into his old habits?

Nodding his head at his words, he followed the older man back to their car after bidding
farewell to a few acquaintances, the ride quiet except for his sobs that never really stopped.
How was it possible for his life to fall apart within the expanse of one single day? All
thoughts that crossed his head were about the painter and the moments they shared before
everything went down. Baekhyun started to blame himself. Why did he fall for the other
when he knew that the situation, sooner than later, would turn into something like this?
However that did not mean he wasn’t hurt because of Chanyeol’s behaviour, knowing Jiwoo
had told the other man lies, those which he had seemingly believed.

It made Baekhyun wonder if nothing of what he had said to the painter was of worth and if he
really thought so little about him. Shaking his head to get rid of those depressing thoughts, he
continued to stuff his clothes into his suitcase, the whole situation draining him so much that
he had not even the energy left, to properly keep his eyes open.
He knew, the only thing saving him now and helping him find his way back to the ground
was to wait for the taller one to find the letter inside his pocket. There would have been no
use in running to him and forcing him to talk because it would have ruined everything even
more. The only thing he was able to try before exhaustion would take over, was dialing
Chanyeol’s number, every ring of it making his heartbeat speed up. But then it cut off before
he was connected to the mailbox, lips quivering from the need to cry. He held himself back,
though, instead laying down only to fall asleep almost immediately.

The island never looked lovelier while they drove back to the airport, a one hour ride that
seemed to drag on the more Baekhyun gazed out of the window. His eyes burned terribly
while his lips were ripped from the continuous biting he did throughout the night. He didn't
get a wink of proper sleep, only turning left and right, and he absolutely didn't care that he
was still in his pajamas, Jiwoo’s judgemental stare, not hurting him at all.

Hope was blooming in his chest, the slightest spark. It never truly left but it was on the brink
of tumbling down when they were finally sitting in the waiting area, their flight going off in
an hour. His fiancé was on his phone like always, standing close to the window where they
could see the airplanes flying high or landing, and Baekhyun sat on his seat, nibbling his
manicured nails while the other hand was stroking over his necklace.

Every two seconds, he stared at the entrance of the airport, hoping to see the tall man he so
dearly loved but nothing happened. Not even the chance of seeing someone who looked
familiar. His tired head and eyes would have loved to create a dream he wanted to be true, but
the clock on the wall was ticking and changing the time too quickly, drawing the end closer
and closer.

At half an hour left, he got up to walk around the floor of chairs, his legs shaking from the
anxiety, only carrying him because sitting had started to be uncomfortable. He had his lips
between his teeth, biting the flesh harder each time he felt like crying and for once, he had to
admit that he looked absolutely terrible.

It started to hurt when only ten minutes were left, and he knew he was holding back the tears
when his cheeks burned from the amount of pressure he felt in his jaw. Jiwoo had started to
stare at him when Baekhyun had walked closer to the entrance, the people passing by looking
at him weirdly, but what was he supposed to look like, when his heart was breaking over and
over again.

Being ripped out of his trance by the hand on his arm, he stared up at Jiwoo and saw the
coldness in his eyes, chest burning with hate when he slapped his chest harshly, trying to get
rid of the anger that was bubbling up inside him like crazy. How had this man been able to
destroy everything within the span of a few minutes?

" It is your fault, everything is. You ruined it, you ruined me. I hate you so, so much,"
Baekhyun spitted, unable to see properly due to the hate that covered his brown eyes. His
world was crashing down right in front of him, heart shattering like glass and no one cared.
Not even the person that was supposed to marry him one day.
Jiwoo looked annoyed and bothered while Baekhyun followed him into the airplane. His
body had given up just like his soul, and he knew there was no chance for him to recover
soon, not when the pain was almost unbearable. What was he supposed to believe now and
what was he supposed to cling onto, to make him feel like everything was not as bad as it
truly was?

Staring out of the window of the airplane, he had buckled up and now hung in his seat
lifeless, eyes hurting so badly that it was tiring to keep them open and that was when he
reached for the sleeping pills he had in his small bag. The ones he had not touched ever since
he and Chanyeol grew closer, the one thing he didn't want to ever see again and yet, it was
what always had helped him fall asleep and forget about what had happened at least for a
while.

Before he took one, though, he got up once they were in the air and hid inside the toilet,
finally letting his walls crash down and his tears to freely stream over his heated skin. It hurt,
everything hurt so much, and he simply could not focus on anything else, but the pure
sadness that took over his heart. There was disappointment, fear but also still hope. The one
thing that started to make him hate himself because who would still have hope after all of
this?

A small part of him just refused to believe that Chanyeol betrayed his trust instead of staying
by his side, and he clung onto that one with his shaky fingers, grip not as tight as he hoped it
to be. That was also when he dried his eyes and swallowed one of the pills, body falling
asleep the moment he was back in his seat, and maybe it was better that way because the pain
and worries all disappeared if only for a while.

When Chanyeol had woken up, it had been half past eleven, the clock on his nightstand
ticking slowly. To be honest, that evening when Baekhyun had stood in front of him, tears
running down his beautiful face, all he had wanted to do, had been to wrap him into a hug
and steal him away from the chaos in order to tell him that everything would be fine again.

Still, he was terribly hurt about the fact that they would leave and that Baekhyun did not tell
him about it. He was conflicted about the things he had heard while also knowing just how
devastated the brown haired man had looked like, the day before. It made him feel like a fool,
to not be able to differentiate what he believed and what he wanted to believe, eyes gazing
towards his coat, that laid on top of the chair in his room.

It reminded him that the smaller had stuffed something into his pocket, curiosity getting the
best of him when he reached out for it, only to touch a letter that seemed to be inside. It was
blue and smelled like expensive perfume and it immediately reminded him of the other,
shaky hands unfolding it, only to end up crying, his body leaning against the headrest of the
bed while his legs stretched over the mattress.

Dear Chanyeol-ah,

You know, there are a lot of things I want to tell you. Things I had been scared of up until
now. I'm only writing this, in case I won't be able to speak up, because whenever I look at
you, it feels like I am struck by lightning. As if all the air in my lungs disappeared at once.

Ridiculous right?

The moment I met you for the first time, was a changing point in my life and I didn't realize
that until the time we spent the night together. It only hit me then, so hard and painful, that I
felt stupid for not having caught on sooner.

Do you remember when we looked at the stars together, and you held my hand for the first
time? It made me wonder how I deserved your attention and what I did in my past life to be
blessed with someone like you.

My whole life I spent with the sadness that I carried around. You, Chanyeol, you are the one
who completely changed that. You made me feel things I never knew were possible, and you
made me realize how badly I hate the life I had been living up till now.

You make me feel complete.

You make me happy.

You make me feel like I deserve to be loved.

Chanyeol-ah, no one can fix me but you. As cheesy as this might sound, I forget my worries
when you hold me close. I dive into this endless ocean of comfort when you kiss my lips, and I
feel like crying tears of joy whenever you look at me. Just me and no one else.

And yes, I have fallen for you. I noticed that way too late, but I’m telling you now, so it's
okay, right? I’ve never loved someone as much as I’ve learned to love you, and I hope you
reciprocate my feelings.

I want to spend every free minute with you and your talent to make me smile and feel alive. I
want to be the one to kiss you whenever I want to, and I want you to be the one to kiss me
whenever you want to. I want to be able to call you mine and fall into you completely without
a safety net.

I hope you will read this when everything went the way I planned, and we are now sitting on
your couch or laying in your bed. I don't really care as long as you're with me.

I love you, Chanyeol.

So much.

Yours, Baekhyun

It made him laugh, so loud and drenched in hurt that he did not even care how fast his tears
were rolling down his cheeks. Why had there been even one second in which he had believed
Jiwoo more than the person he had fallen for. The one that made him feel impossibly lighter,
everytime he looked at him. Glancing at the clock, he reached for his phone to contact the
smaller, only to see a missed call. It made his stomach drop, eyes hurting even more than
before.
Biting his lip and wanting to punch himself at how stubborn he had acted, he rubbed his
hands over his eyes, drying the tears in order to properly calm down. He did not wait too long
to get up knowing he still had time, only clad in grey sweats and a black shirt. His hair was
not in a bun and his eyes had the deepest eye-bags possible, but he did not care. Not when
there was something he had to take care off, that could decide if he would fuck up even more
or if he could turn it all around again.

Grabbing his car keys and coat, he climbed into his seat and started the vehicle, eyes focused
on the street while his hands were gripping the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles
turned white. There were just so many things rushing through his head at the same time, like
the image of Baekhyun crying, fully knowing it was his own fault and the pain he probably
made him feel. All those things Jiwoo had offered were nothing in comparison to one single
smile of the other, and he hated himself for not realizing that sooner.

As he finally reached the airport, there were only five more minutes left, which made him
park his car completely wrong only to run inside and towards the gate. His heart was racing
like crazy, so fast that it was the only sound he was able to hear, eyes burning from the tears
that threatened to fall.

There were so many people with luggage, their voices louder than his own thumping
heartbeat and slowly but surely, the panic settled in. Turning his head towards the lady behind
the counter, he ran over and slammed his hands onto the cold wood, eyes hopeful yet
terrified.

" E-Excuse me, did any flight leave for Seoul already?"

" Oh, yes about a minute ago. It just set off."

Smiling as if he didn't hear it correctly just now, he thanked her and walked over to the huge
glass windows, hand pressing against the coldness to calm his nerves down. It was more than
difficult, and he knew he was crying when his cheeks were hot from the tears, reflection
making him seem pathetic.

And maybe he was.

There had been the terrifying fear of everything being true, of him having fallen for someone
who used him for pure desire, and he knew he had been blinded by his own insecurities. By
the unrealistic chance of not fitting into this world of the younger’s without realizing that he
was Baekhyun’s world.

To some extent he had every right to be scared, but then again, had it been the right moment
to act like that? The missed call in his phone just underlined the mistake he had made,
Baekhyun’s words sounding so hopeful, and he just knew he did not even deserve an ounce
of what the brown haired man probably felt for him, his ignorance overshadowing
everything.

_____________________

Seoul
Several days later

The air was much more different than in Italy, with thick darkness hiding even the slightest
stream of sun while there was smog right in front of the huge windows. It hid the skyscrapers
and left an endless ocean of clouds. Baekhyun had spent almost the whole week sitting on the
floor, staring into the distance which didn’t feel like home at all. There was this emptiness
that tugged on his heartstrings, every time he remembered the taller and his warm brown
eyes, simply ruining him till he wasn’t even able to recognize himself.

Wrapped in one of his soft blankets, his eyes hurt from the missing sleep and the constant
blinking he did, tears having dried out completely. It had been a mess when they had landed,
the younger ignoring Jiwoo as if he was the pest himself, avoiding even having to stare at
him. Just one glance would have been able to bring back everything that made Baekhyun feel
like the cheap whore he was painted out to be, now fearing that the one he loved viewed him
as such as well.

Many reasons could have explained why Chanyeol did not show up that day at the airport,
but the leading guess was that he did not reciprocate his feelings and that he truly wanted to
push his career forward rather than stay with the smaller. All those things were a fantasy, one
his brain decided to enforce in order to suppress the breakdown that would have hit him
otherwise. Baekhyun was thankful to some extent, but he felt alone. No, more than that. It
felt like his heart was simply unable to grasp any sort of emotion, body almost soulless.

Jiwoo had noticed that and most definitely knew that it was mainly his fault, but to no one's
surprise, he did not care at all or at least he seemed like he didn’t. He was there during the
night, locked into his bedroom and gone during the day, chasing whatever appointment he
had to attend. It felt suffocating to be in his presence, and that was also why the brown haired
man struggled so much to get up and get ready for the event they had to go to.

Briefly after they had arrived back home, they had attended an event Jiwoo had not told him
about beforehand, and of course, he ended up looking lifeless while acting like the perfect
fiancé. However, a few days after that, they had met Baekhyun’s parents and recalling their
conversation, he did not feel as bad as he had been about everything.

The rain was crashing down harshly, the moment he had stepped out of the car while still
being clad in his pajamas. Baekhyun couldn’t have cared less when the ends of his pants were
soaked with the dirt of the street, his feet carrying him faster than his mind could react. Jiwoo
drove him to his parents’ house, but he chose to go slowly, an umbrella protecting his body.

With only one thing on his mind, he ran inside the mansion. The atmosphere was as cold as
ever, the grey and white of the walls surrounding him with slow pressure. This place was
something he tried to avoid, if possible, but now he ripped open the door to the room he had
run to, eyes meeting those of the first person in sight.

“ M-Mom.”

“ Baekhyunnie?.”
Feeling his lips quivering like crazy, he waddled closer on shaky legs before dropping down
in front of his mother, his head immediately pressing against her stomach. It was comforting
to see her sitting in bed and reading a book, while his father was asleep already.

A few moments passed by in which he just silently clung onto her, a warm hand stroking
through his wet hair and calming him down, briefly remembering those moments of his
childhood, in which he had been so happy. In which there had been actual love shared
between them and not the coldness nowadays.

“ My dear child, you look completely disheveled. This is so not you, is everything okay?”

It was kind of funny how he could never properly hide that he did not feel good, which is why
he avoided a lot of conversations with his parents, not liking when they called him out for
that. But now, he seeked comfort, he seeked a person he could tell everything to, someone
who would listen. They had their differences in the past especially when it came to the
engagement, but his mother always made sure he was okay.

Even if it was not the most perfect relationship, he knew his secrets were safe with her and
that ultimately led him to look up, face swollen and red from the tears, softly shaking his head
once, “No, nothing is okay.”

He must have looked like a part of his soul was dying right then and there because his
mother’s hands soon gently touched his cheeks to make him look up, thumbs stroking the skin
ever so softly. Was this the moment he alway had waited for? The one where he would finally
open up about the pain inside his chest?

“ Come with me.”

While Jiwoo stayed in the lobby of the mansion, Baekhyun followed his mother to the kitchen,
briefly reminiscing about times in which they had baked cookies together, in which life had
been easier, then he sat down at the table. And once he started to spill everything that had
happened in Italy, including his painting, Chanyeol, and those things Jiwoo did, it felt like the
words were flowing easier than before, his heart wanting to get rid of every dark emotion that
was piercing through the beating muscle.

Tears were shed like water, the more he talked about the true happiness he had experienced,
the feeling of freedom that made him feel alive. The amount of tissues on the table did not
compensate just how badly he was hurting, hand in the hold of his mom, when he sighed
loudly, eyes meeting hers with desperate desire. Even if he knew that what he was doing was
risking their business and would actually be able to ruin the partnership between their
companies, he no longer could hide that he was not happy.

“ I love him, mom…I never thought something like this could happen, but he is everything I
ever wanted. He...he makes me feel alive. He treasures me.”

Silence was the thing that met him, and while it was horribly uncomfortable, he knew it was a
lot to take in. The engagement was based on a working relationship after all, one that kept
both companies successful. It cost his happiness, that was true, and up till now, he never
realized how badly it affected the way he lived. Baekhyun wanted and needed this chance and
he knew it would cause chaos.

His parents never had bad intentions, but they also did not consider his feelings once. It was
common in their relationship, so it wasn’t unusual for the smaller to literally fall apart, with
his nerves tingling. His eyes were constantly gazing at his mother, her eyes which seemed
even more conflicted than his own. Even if there weren't always good times, there was love
from both sides and for once, Baekhyun sincerely hoped it would play into his favor.

“ This is a lot to take in, but you are my son, and I never wanted you to be as unhappy as you
turned out to be, I am sorry I put you through this, but...give me time to talk this through with
your father. We had planned to talk to you both anyways, about your engagement and
marriage. If this is what you want and if you truly love that man, how am I supposed to say
no? I am your mother, and in the end all I wish for, is for you to be happy.”

Choking on a sob, he stood up once again, but this time to hug his mother properly, his
slender arms wrapped around her waist before she hugged him right back, this being the first
embrace they shared in years, during which he sincerely felt protected and safe. It was just
them, and maybe this quietness was also the reason why Baekhyun felt so grounded, while
listening to his mother’s heartbeat.

Stroking his slender fingers over the necklace, which laid against his pale chest, a weak smile
found its way onto his lips, when he remembered their conversation and that ultimately made
him stand up, blanket dropping to the floor before he walked into his room. He had chosen
clothes beforehand because he knew he would not have the energy to pick them when the
time would come. It was easier this way, just slipping into the pants and the button up, his
body moving robotically.

Never would he have thought that heartbreak felt like this, so strong and deep within his body
that it threatened to rip him apart. It was a terrible feeling, and he had wished for it to just
disappear, but on the other hand, it made him feel alive, and that was the main reason he even
dared to go out with his fiancé, the car ride being so quiet.

The event they had to attend was a small gathering, just a few artists and their managers, but
none of their works even came close to Chanyeol’s talent, and Baekhyun hated himself for
seeing him in literally everything; starting from the pasta at the store to the goddamn white
sheets on his bed. He was distracted, not really there and while the other people did not
notice it completely, Jiwoo did and he was angry .

While walking through the big hall and splitting the path of the other’s and himself,
Baekhyun stopped in front of a huge painting which only consisted of brown and blue colors,
the splotches hurting his eyes. It was only when the other man suddenly grabbed his shoulder
that he seemingly woke up from his trance, empty and cold eyes meeting those of his
fiancé’s. It was as if he was unable to even feel anything when it came to the blond haired
man, just accepting his existence.

“ Do you want to yell at me again? Go ahead.”

“ You are out of your mind. Wearing this goddamn necklace everywhere we go and acting
completely out of place. This is going too far.”

Dryly laughing at his words and slapping his hand away from his shoulder, Baekhyun took a
step back to properly look at the other, no sort of remorse in his expression. It disgusted him
how heartless he actually was, and it was the main reason he felt like ruining it all. He did
not, though, not when the other people had nothing to do with this situation.

“ What, you are annoyed by a mere necklace I’m wearing? Aren’t you going too far now?”

“ I know it’s from him , Baekhyun. I knew it from the first glance, and it annoys me, it ruins
everything. Take it off.”

“ No.”

“ Take. It. Off.”

It felt like the time stood still when Jiwoo reached forward and grabbed the necklace, his big
hand wrapped around the dried flower while Baekhyun tried to break free. Everything
seemed to go by so slow, and it completely threw him overboard when it was ripped off of his
throat, the pendant dropping to the floor and shattering into hundreds of pieces.

The silence surrounding them was deafening, no words spoken, only the mere clacking of
shoes in the distance. As if the whole situation hadn’t been bad enough already, it now
seemed like Baekhyun had lost the last spark of hope, Jiwoo’s dry brief cough resonating in
the space between them.

“ See? It is your own fault. At least we got rid of it now. Make sure your face is no longer a
mess when you come back.”

Kneeling down to pick up the pieces with shaky hands, he ignored his fiancé and the fact that
he left him alone once again, eyes brimming with tears that felt like fire because of the way
they burned. In front of him laid the one memory he had treasured the most, now ruined to
the point he did not even know what part fitted the other. But that was also when he saw one
of the petals, rolled like a small piece of paper.

Reaching out to take it into his hands, he, almost eagerly, unwrapped it, soon breaking out
into heavy sobs which he tried to hide between his lips, face and jaw hurting from the tears
and pressure on his muscles. How else was he supposed to react when right in front of him,
was the one thing he had hoped for the whole time, body giving up until he sat on the cold
floor, all alone with the paper crumbled between his shaking fingers.

Pesco, I think I love you.

That event was a turning point for the way he acted around Jiwoo, knowing that he had no
clue what was happening behind his back especially when it came to their engagement.
Weeks passed by in which Baekhyun lost himself more and more to the abnormal need of
contacting Chanyeol, of seeking his voice or just a simple message. But while his parents
were dealing with the situation, he could not risk anything coming in between.

It felt like sweet torture the more he thought about it, and he knew there were still things that
could go wrong. Chanyeol had ignored him that night, had believed his fiancé’s words more
than the smaller’s, but that message he had hidden in the necklace, told Baekhyun enough to
know that he probably also fought with his own demons. Their situation had drifted off into
something that was supposed to clash, making him trust in the fact that they would be able to
somehow piece it back together.

What kept him going was the hope of everything going well, of their relationship to pick up
where they left it, and he knew there was a risk of nothing ever being okay again, but the
older man had changed him. He changed the way he viewed his own life and goals, and that
alone made him want to travel back to Italy, to at least thank him if it wouldn’t work out.

A sad thought, but one that motivated him to take this step when the time would come,
praying to god that Chanyeol would wait for him.

It was a day like everyone else, when early autumn changed into winter and time having
flown by in the blink of an eye. Four months in which he had been living without Chanyeol
and he changed a lot during those weeks, his attitude more confident, his appearance softer
and not as forced and heavy with makeup. Jiwoo realized that as well, and it once again
became obvious, when he rushed through their front door, anger in his eyes before his hands
slammed down onto the counter of their kitchen, papers flying around.

“ What is this? Cancelling our engagement?”

Baekhyun knew that this would happen sooner than later, but he had never expected the other
to react this strongly. The fact of knowing it was finally happening, made him feel so good
and yet, he could not relax. Instead of that he got up and looked at the paper on the table,
fingers stroking over the printed words. They held such an important change within its letters,
something he had fought for, so why was he starting to feel the least bit guilty, staring at the
other’s disheveled appearance.

“ I wasn’t allowed to tell you earlier, I’m sorry if this comes as a surprise, but Jiwoo...you
know that this is better for both of us. This whole engagement found foot on unsure ground
an-”

“ NO. You know absolutely nothing, Baekhyun.”

Flinching at the loud scream of his deep voice, the younger stared at the other man, shock
and confusion reflecting in his brown eyes. He did not quite understand why it seemed to be
an issue now while fully knowing that they fought almost every single day, this pact nothing
more than a way to secure money. There hadn’t even been one single moment in which there
had been something close to like between them, and yet, Baekhyun could sense that there
was something he did not know.

“ What do you mean? “

“ This is not what I wanted, I never wanted us to cancel it. Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

Suddenly feeling bad about the whole situation, Baekhyun walked closer to his fiancé to try
and find the answer in his expression. It was weird to see him this conflicted and emotionally
distressed, a sort of appearance the smaller had never seen before and of course, that made
him curious, hand reaching out to touch Jiwoo’s shoulder. The older man tended to hide his
feelings and rather act like he always did, cold and rude, but now he seemed like a whole
different person and it was scary.

“ I couldn’t, I was restricted from doing so...it seems like this is a much bigger issue for you
than for me. Will you elaborate that?”

“ God, Baekhyun. Isn’t it obvious?” Jiwoo groaned, his hair a mess which normally was
perfect, deep hurt in his eyes. The harsh weather outside quite perfectly reflected the situation
inside. He felt like he should have understood what was going on in the taller’s head, to be
more accurate, he had a feeling that he knew what did, but it couldn’t be true, right?

“ You...Do you mean y-”

“ Yes, god, yes, I like you. I absolutely despised it when you got closer to him when you
looked at him the way I always wanted you to look at me. I hated him for being able to evoke
such feelings in you while I seemed to ruin you even more. But this, it is like a slap to my
face. I didn’t want to accept the fact that we would never be like other couples, but you chose
the hard way to tell me this. I can’t blame you, I never treated you right.”

The smaller couldn’t stop himself from laughing dryly, those words sounding like a joke to
him. But, the more he looked at the other and the way he acted, he knew it wasn’t a lie, and it
made him honestly feel weird, eyes falling onto the papers under his palm. It had both their
parents signatures, the engagement still going till both of them would sign them as well.

Watching Jiwoo sit down at the table and hold his head between his hands, he simply wasn’t
able to bring himself to speak up, no words laying on his tongue. It was truly surprising to
even be faced with such a thing, and even if he knew that there would be no way for him to
feel the same for the older man, Baekhyun still felt bad. It was sick how there was actual guilt
within his veins, finding a way to bother him from the inside out, when actually, he was in the
right.

“ Are you serious?”

“ Do I look like I am not?” he replied, dryly at that and more like a whisper. It felt like a deep
stab to his heart, not because of the situation itself, but more so that the words did not at all fit
the experience he had made. For those years they had been together, not once did he feel
anything close to love or adoration, it was always cold and uncertain. A part of him had tried
to feel something, just anything that would have made him feel more complete, but they
simply did not work the way he and Chanyeol actually did.

“ You can’t be serious...those years we have spent together were like hell for me, Jiwoo. Not
once did it feel like you liked me, and I know that you are aware of that.”
“ Of course I am aware of that, I did every possible thing the wrong way, horrible at that. I
know I quite literally fucked up especially when I noticed how you look at him and that you
did not look at me like that, ever.”

Some part of that made his heart skip, to know that others probably noticed how immersed he
was with Chanyeol, before he himself was able to come clean with his own feelings. But now
seeing Jiwoo sitting at the table, head between his hands and reflecting the storm outside, he
also felt horrible for having kept the cancelation a secret. There had been no other way, but he
knew that it probably hurt a lot.

“ You indeed did horrible. It felt like you constantly had to remind me that I am just your
trophy husband, nothing more or less, and I hope you understand my point of view, and why I
want our engagement to be cancelled.”

“ I do, I really do understand it, and I won’t fight against it simply because your heart was
already won over by someone else. I may be a horrible person, but I will no longer put stones
on the road you are taking. I want to apologize, if you accept it, of course?”

Those were the first genuine words he had ever witnessed, tumbling out of the other’s mouth,
and it left him speechless. Of course, this meant a lot to him, probably more than anything
else, but to some extent it felt surreal. Nevertheless, after what felt like ages, he walked over
to Jiwoo’s side and gave him a short hug, one he had never initiated in those years. It was an
acceptance of his apology, an offer of peace and it felt good.

“ I accept it and I thank you for cooperating. Jiwoo, I sincerely wish that the next person you
meet, you will treat them the way they deserve. Promise me this, okay?”

Waiting for an actual timid nod of his head, it felt weird to be the one to have the upper hand
for once, but it was also freeing, and at one point, he stopped hugging him in order to prepare
to leave. It was crazy how suddenly all that was on his mind, were those rough warm hands
that had touched him in ways he had learned to be addicted to, and the more he drowned into
those thoughts, the brighter his smile got.

The time he had to himself gave him the opportunity to think about the whole situation once
more, knowing that it wouldn’t have gone smoothly with the breaking of their contract, but
feelings being involved had been new. Over the years, he and Jiwoo had known each other,
the taller never made it obvious that he liked him, the way they interacted more of a forced
conversation. There never was any sign of affection, but on the other hand, everyone loved
differently.

In the end, this at least explained the way he had acted about everything involving Chanyeol,
the lies and their sudden departure. With that one breath, he also ended up thinking about the
painter, and the fact that now nothing was standing in his way. In those four months, he had
never stopped thinking about their time together and the feelings that seemed to grow
stronger the more they were apart.

There was a certain amount of fear, that Chanyeol already forgot about him, that he did not
care as much as Baekhyun did or that he decided to stop loving him. It was completely
normal to feel insecure and yet, the brown haired man could not prevent bad thoughts
invading his brain. He had thought about what he wanted to do, once everything would be
solved, but now that it was closer than ever he was scared to his bones.

Breathing in deeply and releasing it into the warm air around him, he stared out of the
window, the high houses and streets unappealing, and before he knew it, he imagined the
ocean and the beach, remembering the sound of the waves crashing. This was what he had
craved and still did, settling for a soft smile that underlined the determination for the things
that would come.

______________________

As soon as they had both signed the papers, Baekhyun had moved out of their apartment,
him, and Jiwoo having ended everything on a friendly note. His mother had been okay with
it, but his father had more problems accepting the new situation. Both of them, in the end,
have decided that the smaller’s happiness was more important than any amount of money.

It actually had been a huge thing for all of them, and he still was surprised that it played into
his favor but still he was terrified while sitting on the plane, his hands shaking so badly that it
was difficult to hold his glass of water. Baekhyun had booked a one week trip, just in case
that it would not go the way he prayed for it to go, the luggage he had taken with him quite
small in comparison to the first time.

There was no longer a necklace he could touch to calm down, but the little note was now
inside his pocket, his fingers stroking over it whenever the anxiety just got too much. Staring
outside of the window, the clouds looked mesmerizing from above, the endless amount of
water making him smile and then he heard the announcement through the speaker, telling him
that they had arrived at their destination.

Baekhyun had thought about contacting Chanyeol beforehand, about a million times, but it
did not feel right, and honestly speaking, he liked it more this way. If he would end up seeing
the other with someone else, he wouldn’t have embarrassed himself that way. He knew his
thoughts were spiraling, and he hated himself for panicking so much, but the moment he
stepped onto the streets, which were covered only slightly in snow, he, weirdly enough,
calmed down.

This feeling in his chest reminded him of home, the loose pullover he was wearing covering
his neck and keeping him warm enough. He had not dressed up like he used to, only clad in a
comfortable pair of pants, but the more he walked along the way he remembered, he felt his
nose turning cold. He probably looked like Rudolph, literally able to feel how red his skin
was, but he had no time to dwell on it further, when he saw a familiar face at the grocery
store he passed by.

“ Jongin?”

Watching the tall man turn around, a brown big scarf covering half of his face, Baekhyun
could not hold back the soft smile that found its way onto his cold lips, arms opening wide
when the other rushed over. The hug was so warm and comforting, like nothing had changed
and no time had passed by. Closing his eyes for the time they just stood there, his suitcase
beside him, hands stroking over the taller’s back, he moved back when Jongin did and met
his tender gaze.

“ I...we missed you so much. Everything happened so fast after the gala, but you’re back.”

“ I am. I missed you too. A lot happened in those last four months, but one thing did not
change, and that’s why I came back,” Baekhyun explained, his hand subconsciously reaching
into his pocket to hold onto the little note again. There was a certain amount of curiosity that
made him want to just say what he wanted to know, but he chose to stay calm and instead
looked up at the other, the slight glint in his eyes obvious.

“ Hm, I thought so already. Say, how about you pass by the gallery for now. It changed quite
a lot, and I’m sure you will enjoy it. There actually is a small event today.”

Reading between the lines, the brown haired male couldn’t avoid biting his lips in thought.
To be honest, he was terribly nervous the more he thought about all the possibilities of this
going horribly wrong, but the way Jongin suggested visiting the gallery made his ears perk
up, head nodding before he could even reply. And with that he was alone once more, gaze
following the other until he disappeared into one of the sideways.

Continuing to stride along the streets, his feet stomped through the thin layer of snow, soft
noise making him smile and momentarily distracted. Everything was exactly like he
remembered, and he simply couldn’t fathom that a place he had known for roughly six
months, could make him feel like this. At peace.

Slightly shrieking up when he heard loud laughter close by, he realized he had reached the
gallery, legs carrying him inside before he even felt ready, but there was just this strong need
to see what Jongin had been talking about, eyes gazing over the few people inside and the
paintings. And indeed, there were a lot of new ones, colorful and beautiful. Dragging his
suitcase behind himself, he smiled to himself when suddenly a certain frame caught his
attention.

It was bigger than the others, displaying a field that was covered in high grass. There was a
tree in the middle of it, small peaches growing on the branches and making him feel almost
nostalgic until his breath suddenly got clogged up in his throat. Stepping even closer,
Baekhyun dropped his suitcase, not caring if it was standing in the way. There was a couple
right under the tree, lying on a blanket while the taller of them held one of the peaches, both
laughing wholeheartedly.

He didn’t know what came over him when he was suddenly crying, tears literally streaming
down his face the more he stared at the bright colors, the two men and the fruits. Baekhyun
knew exactly what this was supposed to represent, and it got even clearer when he saw the
name at the bottom, lips quivering before he kneeled down to touch the tag, shaky fingers
stroking over the cold metal.

“ Moments Of Realisations”

Park Chanyeol
#1 Place At The YICCA Contest

It felt surreal, everything about this, but mostly the fact that Chanyeol had drawn them.
Staring at the picture for a crazy long amount of time, he simply could not stop crying, and it
got worse when he saw the other paintings close by, displaying a dark roadside with a car in
the middle of it. The windows foggy and only the silhouettes of two people being visible.

This couldn’t be real, right?

Standing up on wobbly legs, he sniffed his nose and walked closer to read the title, hiccuping
slightly when it also read the taller’s name, the drawing itself being called “A Heated Kiss”.

There were some people who seemed concerned about his behavior, his eyes pretty red and
swollen due to the amount of tears, but he didn’t care. Not when he realized that every
painting in this gallery displayed a moment they had shared together, his eyes falling onto the
name of the event.

The Summer I Met My Muse

Was this really happening right now?

Or was it just a dream, too good to be true?

Rubbing his hands together vigorously in order to calm down, he stood in the middle of the
huge hall, people passing by him in slow motion, when his ears picked up footsteps behind
him. It felt like the time froze for a second, heart beating so loudly that his head started to
hurt, but he was simply too scared to turn around, fearing that his legs would give in if he
dared to. As if someone had pressed a button, most of the guests surrounding him, had
walked further away, the tall presence behind him familiar and that was when he heard it, the
voice he had craved so immensely.

“Pesco.”

Turning around and only being able to see hazy, due to the tears, he breathed in loudly, his
lips still quivering just as heavy. There was no rationality when he ran towards the other,
jumping into his arms only to hold onto his neck tightly. His face pressed almost immediately
into his neck, taking in the woody scent he had missed so dearly. Baekhyun was still heavily
crying, his face starting to swell to the point it hurt, but when he felt those strong warm hands
against his back, holding him up, he just instantly relaxed.

“ Baekhyun..I thought...I thought you wouldn’t come back,” Chanyeol whispered into his ear.
lips quivering against the younger’s neck, his voice sounding so heavy with emotions that
Baekhyun just had to squeeze him the least bit harder, head shaking against his shoulder. It
send shivers down his spine when the taller pressed his nose against his cheek, his lips so
close to his own, “ I’m so sorry, so so sorry for eve-”

Pulling away to press his finger against the painter’s lips, he successfully shut him up and
saw the water brimming inside his big brown eyes, a moment of silence between them when
they just simply stared at each other. This telling them more than any amount of words or
justifications.

“ Just shut up and kiss me.”

Giggling once, his breath was taken away the moment Chanyeol pressed his lips against the
smaller’s, both of them sighing crazily loud. It felt like all the weight on their shoulders
dropped to the floor, leaving the lightness behind that they had always craved. Their lips
moved slowly over each other, similar to those butterfly kisses Baekhyun had given him
during one of their shared nights. It probably looked funny how the smaller was clinging onto
him, his legs wrapped around the painter’s waist, while they made out in the middle of the
gallery, some eyes finding them and staring in delight.

Chanyeol was holding him so tenderly, one of his big hands stroking the younger’s face as if
he tried to imprint every line and crease into his head, as if he had thirsted for another
moment in which he would be able to show him just how heavily he adored his presence. The
tears they tasted were salty but a sign of happiness, and it filled them with love, so much
love.

It wasn’t until breathing seemed to come short that Baekhyun had to pull away, his nose
nudging the older man’s over and over again, a smile not disappearing from his now swollen
lips, and it grew bigger when he could see the other returning it just as brightly. Carefully
getting back to the ground, he stood up on his tiptoes, hands cupping the artist’s face only to
stroke his thumbs over the skin. He felt like he had to memorize every detail once again,
before drying his own tears, gaze finding that of Chanyeol’s briefly after that.

“ There is a lot I need to tell you, Chanyeol-ah.”

Those four months in which Baekhyun was out of reach, were probably the worst weeks
Chanyeol had ever gone through. Not only because of the situation, but also because he
worried that he had done everything wrong. Literally every little thing was led by self-
reproach, leaving him to have sleepless nights. If he had disappointed him, hurt him or worse,
simply because of not being able to believe him, he deserved it.

At least that was what he continued to tell himself until the point Kyungsoo and Jongin had
to drag him out of his apartment, to prevent him from drowning in his thoughts. There were
various moments in which his thumb had hovered over his phone, the smaller’s number on
the display, but he was scared about the outcome, would he even pick up? Baekhyun had
known about their departure, and he simply couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that he
had not cared as much as he should have.

Chanyeol had been hurt, confused and mostly insecure, but it also made him realize just how
strongly he was feeling for Baekhyun, his feelings having deeper roots than he had at first
thought. It was crazy to imagine how fast he fell for him, how captivated he was by his sheer
beauty and character, but he wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. He inspired him in more
than one way, and he was angry at himself, for not speaking out on that.
Once he had been sure about the way he had acted, he drew. His room started to be filled with
paintings of those moments he had loved and enjoyed so much, those that relived the
memories of him and Baekhyun together. This wasn’t just a mere summer fling, and it
showed in the way he drew, with much more emotions and detail. The previous works were
nothing short of fantastic, but this, this was a whole other level, and it helped him to recover
his confidence, wanting to do everything possible just to see his sweet smile again.

That was also why he stayed in contact with the co-founder Jiwoo had talked about, working
out a contract that promised much more success and stability than the previous one. He had
told them that he had been working on this gallery event, some sort of slideshow but with
paintings, and they had absolutely loved it. Of course, it hadn’t always been easy especially
because of money and security, but he had risked everything when he had sent a picture of his
drawing to a renowned contest, and he was more than taken aback when he had won.

Maybe it was the confidence Baekhyun had made him feel, everytime he had said how great
his works were, his eyes lingering on his portrait more than once every day, but it changed
the way he worked with things. It made him braver, and it also led to him having his own
event, sponsored by his new business partner. Basically, it was not only an event on Amalfi,
but also simultaneously in Paris and London, smaller ones to gather attention and make him
known. It was a success, maybe even more than that because after that, he received a lot of
commissions, those he had always dreamed of.

But with the success, he realized how badly he needed Baekhyun to be by his side, as his
support, motivator, but mostly, as his lover. The guilt ate him up slowly, and no amount of
work would have been able to cover that feeling. At one point, he had been ready to travel to
Seoul, to simply search for the other and free him from Jiwoo’s grip, but he had known that
would have been risky.

So, how funny was it for him to finally have been ready to call the other, his number once
again on his phone display, only one click away, just then for Jongin running into him on the
streets. His eyes glistened with something he had wanted to understand, hands soon in a tight
hold to keep him from doing what he had wanted to do.

“ Chanyeol, don’t. There is something you need to do that is more important than this call.”

“ What would that be?” He had asked, brows furrowed together while his hands had locked
his phone because it seemed serious, and something told him it indeed was more important.

“ Go to the gallery, now. There is someone waiting for yo-”

He didn’t even wait for the other to finish his sentence when his feet already had carried him
along the roadside, literally running towards the location until it was in sight. His lungs felt
like they might explode any second, hands sweaty from anxiousness. What stopped him from
entering, though, were those thoughts again. The fear of this not ending good. Something told
him it was definitely Baekhyun, but at the same time, he wondered just what made him come
back.

To cut ties?
To tell him off and bring back the necklace he had gifted him?

At this point, his head was hurting from the amount of pressure he put on himself, and it
ultimately made him walk inside, seeing the person he had so dearly missed right in the
middle of the room. His shoulders were shaking and his legs as well, and Chanyeol just knew
that he was crying, overwhelmed by the paintings all around him. The moment it sunk in that
he really was here, in Italy, he risked it all and spoke up, happiness flooding through his veins
when Baekhyun had jumped up into his arms.

The worries and the panic disappeared in an instant, only making room for his arms to snake
over the other’s small waist as well, holding him as close as possible to make sure this
moment would never end.

“ Chanyeol-ah...I’m so proud of you.”

Sitting in the taller’s apartment after all those months, a cup of hot chocolate between his
slender fingers, Baekhyun had only eyes for the other. The need of wanting to memorize his
features, all over again, was strong, and he couldn’t avoid that it was more than obvious.
Having listened to the older man’s words and the things he’s gone through, warmed his heart
but it also made him yearn because he would have loved to experience it together with him.

Nevertheless, it would have been impossible, and he knew that. Sensing a gaze on him, he
stroked one of his fingers over the rim of his cup, his nerves calmer now that the first step
had been taken. Italy was beautiful in summer, but even more mesmerizing in winter, and he
noticed that when he stared out of the window. The ocean seemed almost quiet, waves
crashing against the shore slowly.

“ You know, I’ve never told you this, Baekhyun, but you are my muse for far more reasons
than just art. I messed up completely when I left you that night, and I regretted it even more
when I stood at the airport, the plane already gone. I know I hurt you with the way I behaved,
and I know me feeling depressed as well, was not as justified as the way you probably felt,
but god...did I miss you.”

It made the smaller’s heart drop impossibly low, eyes threatening to water once more because
he had thought Chanyeol did not follow him that day. At least he believed that, but imagining
the other standing there all alone, waiting for him, ripped him apart. Sniffing his nose and
sensing that he was not yet finished with what he wanted to say, Baekhyun got up to sit
beside the painter, his hand finding his bigger one to hold it tightly, a reassuring squeeze
following.

“ Let’s not dwell on that, okay? I’m here now, I won’t leave again...that is, if you want that
too?”

“ Of course, I want that,” Chanyeol replied, his voice as soft as honey when he gently cupped
the smaller’s cheeks, carefully pulling him into another kiss. It was still so full of desperation
when it lasted a bit longer, Baekhyun soon pressing his nose against the other’s before he
sighed. It just felt right, and it made him want to cry all over again just because this was what
he had wanted all this time. This warmth was what made him melt and unravel his true self.
Soon, the brown haired man felt a finger stroke over his collarbones, and it made him look
down, knowing exactly what the taller thought of.

The naked skin was missing something important, the thing that reassured him over all those
months that had passed by.

“ It’s broken, Jiwoo pulled on it when we fought. I have the pieces in a small box though, as
well as the little message you wrote me.”

Watching the older man’s ears turn a vibrant shade of red, he could not suppress the giggle,
and it was addicting to wanting to see him this shy. Which is why he pulled the small paper
out of the pocket of his coat, unwrapping it before Chanyeol could react, “Pesco I think I
love you.” It ended with a big gasp when he was pushed down the couch, the taller trying to
grab the paper and pull it from his hands while tickling Baekhyun’s sides.

It was not until the younger man grabbed the artist’s hand that he stopped moving on top of
him, lips finding his knuckles to give him a kiss once, twice and a third time, their eyes
meeting almost immediately after that. And it felt like there was no need to talk about this
any longer, not when both of them felt so secure and understood. Going through such ups and
downs before even being in a relationship, seemed to make them feel even more connected,
hearts beating the same rhythm.

And maybe that was the thing that truly showed them that this was meant to be, lips curving
into bright smiles, before Baekhyun leaned up to press another tender kiss against the other’s
short stubble.

“ I love you too, Chanyeol-ah. I think I always did.”

Those words that he had been wanting to say for so long, slipped from his mouth easily now
and yet, it was addicting and the younger knew there would never be a time in which he
would stop saying them ever. Not when it made his lover tear up, those black long locks
hanging in front of his sculptured face, before he reached his hand down to touch Baekhyun’s
face again, pulling him into a kiss that was a promise.

A promise for their future, together.

_____________________________

Epilogue

2 years later

He was used to the fresh air hitting his face in the morning now, and he also was used to
waking up within strong arms. In those two years that passed by, Baekhyun grew addicted to
the scent and touch of Chanyeol, to his every act and smile. It felt like they were inseparable,
and he truly wanted it to stay that way.
The other loved him in many ways, not only physically nor emotionally. His little acts of
appreciation, adoration and care made the younger believe that yes, this was true love. That
man laying beside him was his soulmate, his partner for life and even thinking about that
made him want to cry real tears.

Time started to be no longer of the essence when he was together with the taller, knowing
that every moment he shared with him was precious in itself. After some consideration, he
had moved to Amalfi and into a bigger apartment with his lover, directly located at the beach
so they could step out and walk towards the water, whenever they felt like it. It wasn’t always
easy, but it was worth it. Chanyeol was worth it.

Something in the way he treated him and took care of the smaller, made him fall only more in
love to the point he felt like crying, every time that intense feeling in his chest wanted to
climb up his throat. Maybe it was the fact that he had never loved before this, maybe all those
locked up emotions grew in intensity because he had kept them to himself for so long.
Moreover, Chanyeol was a god, both in bed and outside of it, which was probably the main
reason why he woke up with back pain.

Again.

Blinking his eyes open and seeing the other’s face up close, he suppressed the immense need
to kiss his pouty lips and instead carefully moved away from his body, the white sheet
seeming vibrant against the golden skin of the older man. He was adorable when he was
asleep, resembling a big puppy, and Baekhyun seriously didn’t want to wake him up. Once
on his feet andvery shaky legs, he reached for his black robe to cover his naked body, one last
glance shooting Chanyeol’s way before he quietly walked downstairs into their kitchen.

Saturdays were usually spent at home, with good food and movies because they both picked
it as their break day from work. And once in a while, the smaller wanted to return the various
breakfasts in bed by doing it by himself now. To be honest, he changed a lot in those two
years, mostly for the better. His cooking skills were able to compete with those of the other’s,
and he also just started to be more relaxed, calm and free. It showed in the way he walked
and acted, much more like someone who enjoyed life. Something that almost made him cry
because the one responsible for that, indeed was his boyfriend.

Chuckling to himself, he started to prepare french toast with strawberries, blueberries and
honey. One of the few sweet things they enjoyed and he knew the whole kitchen was
smelling like a bakery when he was done, just praying that the older man didn’t wake up
from it. Walking to their terrace, Baekhyun slowly opened the glass door and set the table,
food in the middle as well as freshly pressed orange juice. It were the little things that made
him feel this content, and every day, it proved to having been the right decision to fly back.

Walking back up to their bedroom, once he was done, he had to hold back the heated
thoughts within his mind, when he saw Chanyeol sprawled over the bed, crotch barely
covered by the blanket. He was the most gorgeous person he had ever laid eyes on, and it still
felt like a dream, knowing this man was his. Carefully climbing back onto the bed, he sat
down on the taller’s waist, hand reaching out to stroke through the other’s long black hair, in
hopes it would wake him up. And it worked, because after a few more seconds, Baekhyun
was met with a loud yawn and then a smile that seemed to be in a constant battle with the
sun.

“ Good morning, my love.”

“ Hey...did I oversleep?” Chanyeol asked, slightly worried, because he knew they usually got
up early to fully enjoy the day. The small shake of Baekhyun’s head though, made him smile
softly, before his big hands wandered up to touch his boyfriend’s waist, “ Everything okay?
Are you in pain?”

That made the smaller shake his head once more, lips caught between his teeth, because even
after so many nights they spent with each other, bathing in each other’s presence and
reaching that certain height together, he still was shy. And he definitely knew why Chanyeol
asked, because the previous night certainly wasn’t that innocent.

However, he just could not suppress the brightest smile possible when the older man
skillfully undid his robe, revealing his naked body which was covered in love bites. For a
second, Baekhyun closed his eyes and let his lover look at every part of him, of course only
making sure that he was fine. It was a horrible excuse even if it was not said out loud, and
then, the other sat up and pressed his lips right between his chest, kissing up to his neck.

Soft small pecks that made the younger hiss, because the bites of the previous night hurt the
slightest bit. What distracted him was when Chanyeol kissed his lips, finally, head swimming
from the pressure and intensity, soon pulling away again.

“ I’m okay. I prepared breakfast for us. Will you come downstairs with me?”

It was summer, with the sun being as hot as fire and the waves crashing against the tons of
sand, the noise so calming to the ear while Baekhyun sat opposite from the other. Their feet
were teasing each other under the table, both stuffing their mouths with the food he made,
and nothing could ever compare to this type of situation. It almost felt like they were the only
people on this planet, understanding each other without needing to talk.

“ Baekhyun-ah, what are your plans for today?”

Looking up at the taller’s question, he wondered about that for a moment because he simply
didn’t think that far just yet. Due to their break day being structured always differently, he
thought about the things they still wanted to do at some point, his eyes finding those of the
other’s before he grinned, “ Remember that finger paint you bought? Can we try that out
today?”

Something about the way Baekhyun asked this, made Chanyeol smile to himself, feeling like
the love within his heart grew with every beat of it. It was ridiculous actually, at how
completely captured he was by his lover, that even the smallest thing made him feel like this.
On the other hand though, he was the love of his life, so was it really that surprising?

“ Of course, we can, I will lend you one of my painting shirts, so you don’t get dirty.”
“ What a gentleman,” Baekhyun replied before his hand reached over the table to touch
Chanyeol’s, their fingers softly intertwined. It felt good and almost reassuring to always have
him close like this, something he was more than thankful for, “ Did I already tell you today,
that I love you?”

Grinning brightly when the taller did the same, he stood up to lean over the table, his robe
slipping off his slender shoulder, only to reveal the darkest pair of hickeys right across his
neck. He liked it more than he would have admitted, and he knew his lover did think the
same. Pressing his petal shaped lips against those of his boyfriend, he gave him one kiss, two
and a third, before he pulled back, eyes gazing back at the table.

“ I will clean this up, Baek, go have fun with the paint, okay? I will join you once I’m done.”

“ You’re the best,” Baekhyun gasped, before he excitedly ran back inside, their shared art
room not that far down the hallway. It was a beautiful place, with a lot of flowers and
Chanyeol’s gallery on one side. On the other was a desk and tons of books from the smaller,
indicating that he was writing once again. A story that resembled that of his and the older’s, a
surprise he was still keeping a secret.

Quickly slipping into some fresh underwear, he grabbed one of the shirts Chanyeol always
kept in the art room, one that was way too big on him and covered his body till the knees. It
felt good and the scent hitting his nose was insanely addicting. Something he had loved since
day one.

There were blank canvases on the floor and that was probably the main reason why he sat
down on the wood, instead of on one of the seats. This way it just seemed easier to
completely dive into the task at hand, literally, because once he had opened the small
containers with paint, he immediately went to work and pressed his fingers against the canvas
in front of him.

The coldness of the colors felt weirdly calming, while he grazed his fingertips over a certain
spot, mixing blue and red, just like the way Chanyeol had taught him. It made him briefly
remember the many art sessions that ended with heated sex, his ears set on fire the more he
tried to get rid of those memories. No matter how often they would do it, there would still be
this small part of him that was shy, and it showed in every action he did.

Lost in thought, he did not notice the other walking into the room as well, only when he
suddenly sat down behind him, his warm lips pressing against his neck over and over again.
Sighing at the feeling and briefly stopping his hand, he giggled when his lover sucked his
skin in a teasing way, a gasp leaving his small mouth.

“ Chanyeol-ah, I can’t focus if you do this.”

“ Hmm...I know. I want you to be distracted for a while,” Chanyeol whispered and continued
his little ministrations, with the only goal of wanting Baekhyun to focus on the way he made
him feel. Today was quite a special day for him, because after weeks of literal fear within his
bones, he finally felt ready to take the next step. Snaking his hands down the other’s torso, he
stopped at his waist and started to tickle him.
So much that he fell backwards, his beautiful laughter covering the room, just like the rays of
sunshine. And yeah, that was one of the many reasons the older was so heavily entranced by
him. Laughing along when the tears sprang to his lover’s eyes, he waited for the right
moment and then reached for Baekhyun’s hand, slipping on the ring that he had kept to
himself for so many weeks.

It wasn’t until Chanyeol stopped tickling him, that the smaller finally calmed down again
only to dry his tears. That was when he felt the cold metal against his cheek, heart skipping a
beat while his body froze up. It just felt unreal, and he was scared for some seconds, still
daring to move his shaking hand right in front of his eyes. There was a mesmerizing gold
purple ring on his finger, looking just like the necklace he had received two years ago and it
started to be difficult to properly breathe.

“ Chany-”

“ Shh...It’s okay. Let me tell you something, okay?”

Nodding his head at his words, he turned around within Chanyeol’s hold, their legs both
crossed with their knees touching. It seemed way more intimate than any other shared
moment, and Baekhyun knew he was crying, when the taller man reached out to stroke his
thumb over his hot skin.

“ Two years ago, I gifted you a necklace with a well hidden message. One that I wanted you
to find when the time is right, this...this right here, is a message too, but one that isn’t hidden,
because the thing I want to tell you with this ring, is that I will always love you. Now and
forever.”

It felt surreal for several reasons, but watching the honesty drip from the older man’s eyes
and the tears also fill them up slowly, he knew this was really happening, and he knew he was
deserving of this huge amount of love. It was funny to look back and know that there had
been a time in which he had thought, that he would never be loved by someone. And now
here he was, with the only man he wanted to yearn for, sitting right in front of him, a proposal
spoken into existence.

Not only was it overwhelming, but also such a beautiful way of showing affection, ultimately
making Baekhyun lean forward to hug his lover, not caring if he smeared paint all over his
face and stubble because the kiss he pressed against his lips was more important. Knowing he
was shaking all over, from head to toe, it was comforting when Chanyeol hugged him back
and held him so gently, his own lips quivering against those of the smaller’s.

A shared moment of vulnerability that only made them grow closer.

“ I love you, Park Chanyeol, so so much, and I will always do so, now and forever,”
Baekhyun whispered against his mouth, words agreeing to those the taller had said previously
because there was nothing that would have made him feel happier and more comforted than
knowing he would be allowed to spent his whole life with the man right in front of him. The
one person that changed his life completely and made him enjoy every minute, every second,
every moment together.
It ultimately made them end up entangled once again, holding each other a way that told them
how many feelings they actually shared, with their tears mixing together and their laughter
harmonizing quietly.

One thing was for sure.

This was only the beginning of their journey and both of them were more than ready to take
the next steps together, slowly but with so much love.

-The End-
 Certain That I'm Yours
Chapter by mochicheekies

Chapter Notes

Hello again my sweet sweet babies.

As you may know, I took a distance from writing due to a massive block, but I promised
I might write a extra chapter. So here we are.

It's not super crazy long, but it works on the things I still wanted to write for our bubs.
Hope you enjoy it and please if you have time, read my end notes, I'm gonna say some
more stuff ❤

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Autumn

Italy had the most amazing weather, from heavy rain to thunderstorms, to burning warmth
and perfect snow. Baekhyun had experienced every one of those since he had moved in with
Chanyeol.

Back in Seoul, it wasn’t as diverse, and he did not enjoy going out that much, so it seemed
even more special that he was witnessing it together with the one he loved. He wouldn’t say
that out loud, though, not when it sounded so embarrassing.

Right now, he was staring at the ocean while sitting on their terrace, a cold cup of coffee
between his hands. These days he was alone during the evening, not because they wanted it
to be like that, but because the older man had appointments to take care of.

His drawings started to be quite famous the more promotion he got, and Baekhyun couldn’t
have been happier. Seeing his lover blossom within the thing he liked doing the most was a
blessing, and he wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

Yes, he sometimes felt lonely, but after four years together, the younger man knew what he
had and what he would always be able to look forward to. It was bearable with those
thoughts, and it was worth it every time he could hear the lock of the door being turned.

Moving his legs down from the chair they had been laying on, he stood up, black nightgown
falling down towards his knees and moving with every step he took. His brown hair was
braided to the sides, the length having doubled ever since he stopped cutting it.

Small naked feet were wandering over their wooden floor until they came to a halt, waiting
for the door to open.

Chanyeol stood there in his suit, necktie crooked and long hair unraveled. He seemed tired,
but he started glowing like the sun when Baekhyun ran over and jumped into his arms.

The younger man was easy to carry, almost as if he was meant to fit into his hold, his hands
sliding down to hold him upwards by his cute butt. Days like those, where he came home
completely drained, could easily be saved by the scent of his lover’s perfume or the mere
touch of his fingers, stroking through his hair.

“ Welcome home, Chanyeollie.”

Smiling into his neck, the older man softly moved his thumbs along the other’s thighs, hands
slipping under his nightgown to grab the skin. It felt soft underneath his rough fingertips,
addicting to some extent but not sexual in any way. They often touched each other like this to
put calmness into each other. Chanyeol knew Baekhyun liked it when he could hear him sigh
into the space right beside his earshell.

“ I’m home, angel. How have you been? Did you take a nap, like you promised me?” the tall
man asked and carefully sat his lover back down, before giving him one soft kiss across his
petal shaped lips. Sometimes, he worried about the younger, knowing he often forgot to take
care of himself, but seeing his timid nod eased his nerves for once.

“ I did, and I already prepared dinner for us as well. Pasta aglio e olio! Just like you showed
me.”

It was almost too cute to handle, watching the other run over to their kitchen, excitedly
showing the pot with noodles and tapping his tiny feet against the floor. In moments like
those, Chanyeol realized that he was hopelessly devoted to the man right in front of him. So
much that he feared his heart would never stop hurting from the amount of beats it hit within
a minute.

Which is also why he took off his jacket and sped over to gently cup Baekhyun’s face once
more, pressing a million tiny kisses all over his face. And he only stopped when he could
hear the soft giggling right in front of him.

“ What is going on with you, Mr. Park?”

“ I missed you a lot today, that’s all,” he replied, nose pressed against the smaller’s. It was
quite intimate, and he was even able to hear the quick heartbeat of his younger lover, but
nothing would come even close to the moment Baekhyun held up the food.

His eyes were glistening with excitement, his lips captured between his small canines. He
was so pretty while not doing anything special, and Chanyeol knew that one thought that had
been on his mind for a long time, was growing heavier with every passing day.
While opening his mouth to try some of the food Baekhyun had made, he knew he wanted
those days to never end, and he knew that he also wanted to exchange the promise ring with
something more. That was a huge thing, though, and it was terribly difficult to come to terms
with the fact that he was completely captured by the man he loved so dearly.

“ Hm, it’s really good, angel. I like the taste.”

“ Really? Oh my god, I’m so glad. I thought I burned the garlic earlier, but if you say you like
it, I’m more than happy,” the younger man replied and turned around to instead prepare two
plates for them. Even if four years had already passed by, nothing would ever stop him from
blushing when Chanyeol showed so much affection.

Well, maybe that was one of the reasons why he felt so complete after all.

Watching the sun go down while sitting on his lover’s lap was probably the best way to end
an evening. Baekhyun had his head resting on Chanyeol’s naked shoulder, nose rubbing
against his freshly washed skin. He smelled like lemons, the really sour ones, and he could
not get enough.

He was tired as well, which is why he was grateful that the older had wrapped them into a
warm blanket. Listening to the waves crashing against the shore, he closed his eyes and
shivered briefly, recognizing the cold wind.

“ Winter is coming slowly. We should enjoy the last nice autumn days, Baekhyunnie.”

Nodding his head, he couldn’t believe that another year was almost over, but on the other
hand, time flew by when they were together, and he quite liked the thought that they were
just too immersed with each other to not notice the seasons passing by.

“ Today, it was rather warm, but the nights are getting chillier, glad I got my own human
water bottle,” the younger one joked and started laughing when Chanyeol pinched his sides.
Never in a million dreams would he have imagined his life to turn out the way it did.

He was so happy, unbelievably actually and a small part of him feared that one day that might
end. He had his insecurities, and he knew they would come by once in a while, but his lover
did a good job to reassure him every given moment.

Feeling his big warm hand stroke over his cheekbone up to his braids, he sighed in content
and cuddled even closer, only humming when Chanyeol spoke up, “ I almost forgot to tell
you, but I met Jongin. He invited us for dinner, this Saturday. I’m sure you have time?”

“ As if you need to ask me, Chanyeol-ah. Of course I do.”

Smiling up at the taller and gladly receiving the small kiss onto his nose, he held onto his
shoulders when he was picked up, knowing they were moving to bed. It was actually
remarkable to witness the older man reading him like a book without a word exchanged, and
he felt like this was the epitome of true love.
At least for Baekhyun himself.

Set down on his side of the mattress, he quickly snuggled over to Chanyeol’s, when he laid
down, to squeeze himself tightly into his arms. The older man often said that his behavior
reminded him of a very cuddly cat, and some part of that made Baekhyun feel so good.

It just simply was the best feeling to lay close like that, one hand in his hair, stroking it
gently, the other one holding the younger one's hand on top of the black haired man’s chest.

Knowing that they soon were meeting their good friends excited him because it felt like ages
since the last time they were out together. Work, indeed, took away a lot of time, so
Baekhyun would make sure to completely dive into the evening that laid ahead of them.

Autumn was weird sometimes.

Some days the sun was flaring on the horizon, burning the skin slightly, and some days it was
so foggy and quiet, announcing possible rain.

Today was the latter, and Baekhyun spent half of his morning searching for appropriate
clothes. Their closet was quite big, but over the years, he had not bought a lot of new things.
The young man learned to love the comfortable life, less revealing things plastered on his
body.

However, due to their last night out having been months ago, he wanted to look pretty for his
lover and for himself. Reaching for one of his black velvety blouses, he pushed his nose into
the fabric, sighing at the good smell of washing powder before also picking fitting black
slacks.

They were slightly flared at the bottom, making his legs look curvy and he absolutely loved
the feeling of them against his skin. It was comfortable and soft, perfect for a long night out.

The blouse also was not too tight or too loose due to him having gained a few happy pounds,
sitting perfectly over his chest. The whole outfit made him look taller than he was but also
gave him the slightest wicked look.

It was a nice feeling to dress how he wanted to and for someone he wanted to impress,
nothing more nothing less. Which is why he also put on some makeup, just soft bronze
eyeshadow and black eyeliner.

His hair, due to the length, was hanging into his face, but he made sure to braid the sides once
more, only pulling a few loose strands out to frame his face.

Chanyeol had told him that he would come straight from work to pick him up, and looking at
the clock, he only had about ten minutes left. For shoes, he picked his favorite black converse
and also went for some earrings and a necklace. The highlight, though, was the promise ring
glistening on his finger.
The flowers were as beautiful as on the day he had received it from his lover and looking at it
always made him smile.

However, he jumped up a little when he heard the knocking on the bedroom door, his head
whipping around to look at Chanyeol.

He was dressed in some striped black pants and a loose white button up, looking as good as
ever. It was actually unfair because no matter what he wore, he always looked absolutely
breathtaking.

To his luck, it seemed like the older man thought the same because his eyes were moving up
and down several times until they finally stopped at Baekhyun’s face.

" You're gorgeous, Baekhyun. "

" Am I?" He chuckled and walked over to wrap his arms around the other's neck, softly
kissing his lips once and then a second time. This close, he could smell his cologne, the
woody one, making his nose tickle from the good scent before he leaned close to his ear to
whisper into it.

" Only for you."

" Well, aren't I a lucky man? Come here," Chanyeol replied with a bright grin and gently held
his lover by the waist. It was tiny, his hand almost covered the whole expanse, and he tried
his hardest to push unholy thoughts right out of his head again.

Sometimes, it was just a bit more difficult.

Baekhyun was the love of his life after all.

" I called a cab for us, so that we can drink some wine together. It should be here soon. Let's
go outside, okay?"

Humming at his words, the smaller man reached for his warm coat and purse and then
followed his boyfriend outside the house, immediately cuddling into his side once more while
they waited.

The sunset was almost over, just the slightest bit of pink and orange still covered the sky and
it was calming in some way. It was just them two and the quiet waves in the background,
reminding Baekhyun of the actual peaceful life they were living.

One thing led to the other soon enough, and when they arrived at the restaurant, Kyungsoo
was already waving his hand, his glasses slipping down his pointy nose.

The atmosphere in the restaurant was calming with the lighting quite dimmed and the people
laughing through their conversations.
Kyungsoo was leaning into Jongin's side while he talked about his new job at the hospital,
making Baekhyun grin softly. They were such an adorable couple, but more importantly, such
good friends.

Not only was Jongin the reason he and Chanyeol had met in the gallery, but they also were
supportive about every move they made throughout the years. However, social interactions
were still tiring for the young man. After all, he was quite introverted due to his past.

Chanyeol knew that, and he also had his tactics for moments like that especially when he
could see that Baekhyun started to feel overwhelmed.

Moving his big hand onto the smaller’s inner thigh, he squeezed the flesh once and then
massaged it, literally able to see the other going slack and relaxing his body once more.

It was adorable even if he knew voicing that out would earn him a slap to the head. He
couldn't resist kissing the side of his face, though. and he ended up smiling softly when
Baekhyun looked up into his eyes, the slightest confusion in his expression.

" Everything okay?" The younger man asked, glad that the other two were immersed with
ordering food for a second. It gave him enough time to touch Chanyeol’s cheek, gently
stroking over the tender light stubble.

" Hm, everything is fine," the taller replied and gave Baekhyun another small kiss, this time
on his beautiful lips, " I just wanted to tell you that I love you. "

Feeling the redness wander up his neck and face, the brown haired man tried to hide his
embarrassment by coughing once, glad that their friends didn't witness their conversation.
Nevertheless, once he calmed down, he nudged their noses together, getting lost in their
moment.

" I love you more."

Stroking his fingers through the few loose strands on Baekhyun’s face, Chanyeol chuckled
once but then got interrupted by the waiter staring kindly at them, indicating that he would
like to take their order.

Clearing his throat, he looked at his lover and then reached for the menu, eyes scanning over
the food.

" Chanyeol-ah, you choose for me. Let's share, okay?" the young man suggested. They did
this quite often, and this time he didn't want it to be any different.

After ordering, they had to face Kyungsoo and Jongin's comically wide eyes.

" You two are such lovebirds. I can't believe you are not married yet," the smaller of them
stated, while sipping on his glass of wine, not knowing what effect those words actually had
on them.

Especially on Chanyeol, who had this thought for a while now.

" You know-"

" Park Chanyeol??"

Their conversation was interrupted by a foreign voice, and it made Baekhyun turn around on
his seat, only to see a young tall man standing in front of them.

His legs were to die for as well as his sharp features. Black hair framed his face perfectly and
his clothes looked more than expensive. Baekhyun had his fair share of experience.

What kind of ticked him off was the fact that Chanyeol seemed taken aback, and then he
suddenly got up and walked over to that man, putting a hand on his shoulder.

Maybe he was a friend? Someone he didn't see in a long time?

Looking at Kyungsoo and Jongin he cleared his throat before speaking up, " Do you guys
know him?"

" Oh yeah, that's Oh Sehun. They had an affair some years ago- Ow???" Jongin blabbered but
was interrupted by Kyungsoo elbowing his side.

" Can't you shut up?"

Well, even if he stopped him before saying more, it already affected Baekhyun. Of course, it
was totally normal for Chanyeol to have had lovers before they met and yet, the thought kind
of bothered his head.

Eyeing his boyfriend and the way he engaged in the conversation with his ex , the younger
man started nibbling his lips subconsciously, not liking that feeling in his chest. He didn't
have anything to worry about, right?

Right?

" Chanyeol?" He spoke up, immediately regretting it when Sehun eyed him as well. His stare
felt like fire on his skin even if they had never met before. Somehow he felt intimidated, and
he didn't like that at all, " May you introduce us?"

" Oh..OH, I'm so sorry, Baekhyun-ah, of course," Chanyeol said and walked back over to
help his lover get out of his seat. His hand felt warm on his hip, gentle like always, but
Baekhyun wasn't able to enjoy it as much.

" Sehun, this is my lover Baekhyun. Baekhyun this is my…..my friend Sehun."

His eyes twitched at that. If Jongin hadn't let the truth slip earlier, would he even be able to
know it at all? Of course, it wasn't an appropriate topic for their first meeting, but the smaller
one couldn't shake off the weird feeling he had.

" You settled down? Seems like you changed a lot, Chanyeollie."

Chanyeollie?
" It's nice to meet you, Sehun. I didn't know Chanyeol had such a handsome friend. You don't
model perhaps?" Baekhyun interrupted before the conversation could go into a different
direction.

Even the touch of Chanyeol on his hips suddenly felt uncomfortable and he never ever felt
like that when they were together. Not even once since they started dating. It was as if he
could see his insecurities creep up behind himself, and he had no clue how to stop them.

"Ah, yeah, actually I am. I had an appointment in Amalfi, and I didn't expect to meet
Chanyeol here. It's nice, though, seeing you again."

Sehun reached out a hand to stroke over the taller's shoulder and just the image of that made
Baekhyun’s lips quiver. Why was it suddenly so difficult to control his feelings, and why did
they overwhelm him when everything had always been fine?

Maybe that was the reason. They never had a fight, discussion or bad moments. Maybe their
relationship was too perfect. Maybe this was bound to happen.

Feeling as if his thoughts were overwhelming him, he carefully broke free from his
boyfriend's hold and instead took a step back, seeing that all eyes were on him.

" I-I need to go to the toilet. I will be right back."

Right back was a lie.

He took almost five minutes just staring at himself through the mirror before carefully
dabbing his face with cold water.

The relationship he had with Chanyeol was his first. His first for everything and he had never
felt jealousy. Now that it happened, he despised the feeling, and he also seemed overwhelmed
by his own insecurities.

Sehun was gorgeous, making him wonder why they didn't work out.

No, no, he was actually glad they didn't; otherwise, they wouldn't have met. But why were
they so friendly with each other when once upon a time, they had hooked up? Was that
normal?

Yeah, maybe it was, and he was just overthinking his behavior again.

Blinking his eyes at his own reflection, he took a deep breath and decided to walk out again,
only to stop at the door. On their table, actually, on his seat was Sehun, talking and laughing
with all three of them. It looked like he belonged there, and it made the young man hate
himself.

Why was he having such thoughts, and why now?

They were supposed to enjoy their first evening together in a long time, and here he was
drowning in his own worries.

Not feeling good about it and knowing he would ruin the night with his mood, he reached for
his coat and walked back to the table, all eyes ending up on him once more.

" I'm not feeling so good, I will go back home and lay down for a bit.."

" Babe? Is everything okay?" Chanyeol asked and got up to gently touch his shoulders. His
eyes were so soft and reflected his worry, but Baekhyun actually just wanted to be alone.

" Headache, I think."

" Then I will go home with you. Wait, I will go get-"

" No. Chanyeol, you were so excited for today, please stay and at least eat the food, okay? I
can ruin my own evening, but I won't ruin yours," he said, hand on his lover's cheek. It was
difficult for him to avoid what he actually would have wanted, but he also didn't want to drag
down the mood.

He knew it would have been a tense evening if he stayed, and none of them deserved his
awkward behavior.

" Are you sure?"

" Yes. I love you, have fun okay? I just...just need to sleep for a little while. "

Moving up on his tiptoes he gave Chanyeol a kiss on his cheek, not his lips and then waved at
the others, avoiding Sehun's curious eyes.

His presence was poison to his nerves even if they never had met before, so leaving was the
only logical response.

Once alone, he could literally hear his own thoughts. He wondered what he and Chanyeol
had done together, if the older man had touched him in the same way, if the kisses were as
passionate and the sex as soft.

Baekhyun had never experienced this jealousy, this threatening fear of losing their
relationship. It was stupid because Sehun had done nothing that indicated such, but it was
invading his head nevertheless.

The young man did not know the feeling of losing someone, of being scared of such a thing
happening for real. So he was overwhelmed, leading to the current situation.

Once at home, he did not turn on the lights, and he did not care to take off his makeup. The
only thing on his mind was their closet and the huge sweatshirt Chanyeol had worn just the
day before.
Stripping himself out of his clothes he wore that shirt and nothing else, just laying down in
bed with his underwear on. The scent of the other's perfume was invading his nostrils,
calming down his thoughts and before he knew it, he really did fall asleep.

It didn't last long, though, because there soon was a hand gently touching his face, and it
stirred him awake.

Right in front of him was Chanyeol, kneeling beside their bed, his eyes full of understanding.
He looked beautiful, even in the bad lighting and something about his mere presence made
Baekhyun tear up.

He just started to sob into the pillow, drawing his boyfriend's attention.

Chanyeol carefully climbed into bed as well, circling his arms around his smaller lover and
pressing him into his chest. He had a feeling that something was wrong, and that the
headache was just an excuse. Oh, how right he was.

" Shhh...it's okay, I'm here. Let it all out," he whispered into Baekhyun’s brown hair, kissing
the crown of his head. His shirt was growing wetter the longer they sat like that, and when
the sobbing died down, he gently grabbed the younger's face and made him look up, drying
the tears with his thumbs.

" My love, won't you tell me what happened? You forgot that I can read you like a book, I
know you don't feel good."

It was such a good feeling, the way his heart pounded against his chest just by the mere
words of the other. He was right, it was terribly difficult to hide when something was wrong,
but this time, it just felt so stupid to even talk about it.

He was embarrassed, ashamed for his thoughts and behavior, and he was scared the other
might judge him. However, Chanyeol was one step ahead when he kissed his hair one more
time and then spoke again.

" It's Sehun, isn't it?"

" H-How-"

" Kyungsoo told me that Jongin spilled the beans. It should have been me to tell you about
this, but now we're here," he explained, only moving away for a second when Baekhyun
crossed his legs on top of his own lap.

He didn't like seeing his younger lover sad, nor did he want to see him cry. And yet, he wasn't
able to prevent it this time, and it was not the nicest feeling.

" I'm so sorry for acting like I did...I just, I don't know. I felt this incredible jealousy within
my chest, and I didn't want you to find out about it. "

" And yet I did. I actually left briefly after you did and brought the food along. This was
supposed to be our evening, so I'm going to make it ours now."
Looking up at his boyfriend and seeing the genuine expression, Baekhyun couldn't suppress
the small smile as well. He was allowed to be loved by someone so impressive, so caring and
gentle. Which still felt unreal.

" So, you're not angry?" He asked timidly, hands actually sweating from the conversation
itself. His worries were justified, but he still felt like an idiot.

" You don't want to know what I would have done if I had seen your ex lover talking to you.
So no, I'm not."

Snorting briefly and covering his laughter with his hand, Baekhyun leaned up and grabbed
Chanyeol’s face, lips pressing against his, but this time he deepened the kiss the slightest.

It felt amazing when the older man wrapped one arm around his back to hold him close,
kissing him back just as feverishly. It wasn't anything too crazy, just their tongues playing for
a while, making the air in the room something similar to steamy.

Baekhyun didn't want it to escalate, though, at least not now. Which is why he drew back
soon enough and instead rubbed his nose against that of his lover's, eyes closed and a smile
plastered on his face.

" You make me so happy, Chanyeol-ah. No one ever made me feel this comforted and cared
for. No one. "

" Do I? Then I should tell you that you make me just as happy, maybe even more than that."

" More?" Baekhyun asked, cutely moving his head to the side, and it was so hard for
Chanyeol to not dive right back in for a kiss. Rather he just nodded, the everlasting thought in
the back of his head.

" More. But that is something for another time, now we should eat because I won't let you go
to bed hungry."

He had to admit, it felt amazing to be treated like a prince. Chanyeol probably didn't realize
that what he was doing was quite special, and that made it even better for Baekhyun.

After they had eaten dinner in bed, the tall man had carefully unbraided the younger’s hair
before cuddling him sideways. Simply just being there even if the situation itself didn't seem
that serious.

Sure, Baekhyun regretted that they didn't spend the night with their friends, but this wasn't
that bad either. The last time they had a full evening to themselves was months ago, this just
felt great.

Closing his eyes at the soft strokes through his hair, he soon opened them again when he felt
his lover stopping completely. What greeted him was Chanyeol dozing off against the
headboard, mouth open and snores escaping his lips.
He looked adorable, and Baekhyun tried his hardest to not laugh while carefully moving him
down onto the pillows. Reaching for the lamp on their nightstand, he turned the light off and
stared at his boyfriend for a moment longer, simply appreciating his presence.

If it weren't for him, he would have never learned what love was and somehow that exact
thought made him emotional again. There was so much adoration within his heart, so much
appreciation that he simply did not know where to put it anymore.

While moving his slender fingers along the other's cheekbone, he remembered the many
nights they had shared together, and their whispered confessions in the dark. Sometimes, it
felt like a dream, all of it, even though he knew that this was his real life.

Chanyeol was everything he ever wanted and needed, and maybe that was why he had
reacted the way he did. Baekhyun had never experienced loss, just imagining it brought tears
to his eyes, and he had felt threatened by the older man's past.

However, he also tried his hardest to suppress those thoughts and instead laid down on the
other's chest, falling asleep while listening to his calm heartbeat.

When he woke up again, it was already morning, fresh air wandering into their bedroom
through the opened windows, indicating that Chanyeol was already awake.

The empty bed supported that thought, and after getting up and waddling into their living
room, Baekhyun found his lover on the couch, only dressed in pajama pants while being on
the phone.

" Paris? No, no, I appreciate the offer and I would really like to take it as well. I just, I just
need to sort out some things beforehand. "

His ears perked up at that, but he knew better than to interrupt the conversation and just
waited for the other to finish.

Once that happened, he waltzed over and climbed into Chanyeol's lap, immediately cuddling
into his naked chest.

" Did my favorite koala sleep well?"

" Hm...I woke up without you, so it was semi good," Baekhyun giggled and welcomed the
kiss against his lips, " I overheard the last bit of your conversation. Paris?"

Briefly getting lost in the kisses that were pressed against the expanse of his neck, the young
man closed his eyes and sighed in content, but then focused on Chanyeol when he moved
back up to his lips.

" Yes. I got an offer to attend an art exhibition, and on top of that, I would be able to show off
two of my works. It would be an amazing promotion, but…"

" But?"
" It's already next week. I will be gone from Monday to Sunday. I just don't know what to do
because I never went somewhere else without you."

That made Baekhyun chuckle. He was the younger one in the relationship, so why was
Chanyeol's reaction resembling that of a child's now?

Moving his hands through his long black hair, the smaller kissed his lover's nose once and
then looked at him, eye to eye.

" And? Then this will be the first time for you! You can't say no to this opportunity Mr. Park.
I won't allow this," he explained, all while moving a tad bit closer onto his boyfriend's lap, "
You, my dear baby, will fly to Paris and rock that exhibition and when you come back, we
will celebrate it together, okay?"

" Are you sure?"

As if he couldn't get any cuter, he proved it was possible by making big eyes and stealing
Baekhyun’s heart once more.

" Yes, my love. More than sure. I will be okay, one week without my boyfriend will be totally
fine. I can finally bring over my other five affairs without you noticing, " he joked, but
immediately regretted it when Chanyeol threw him onto the couch and started tickling him,
ripping the possibly loudest laughter out of his lungs.

It was difficult to not thrash his legs around, and he stopped automatically when Chanyeol
slid his big hands down to his thighs, gently grabbing the skin. Right now, Baekhyun looked
the prettiest, with his red cheeks and tousled hair and the older man found it hard to hold
back.

" You know, I often remember the day we kissed for the first time. I think I was in love with
you back then already. Actually, I think I fell for you the moment we met at the gallery."

" Chanyeol-ah, stop," Baekhyun whispered, embarrassed at his words but also enjoying them
a lot. He was sure that it wasn't any different for himself because the older man had
constantly been on his mind, but sometimes, the expression of love was too much for his
heart.

" I'm just being honest, and I want you to know that loving you was the best decision I ever
made."

The shared silence wasn't awkward, it was rather tense. Those words were heavy in meaning
and the younger man had problems reacting properly because his lips were thirsting for more
than just a mere kiss. Which is why he leaned up and just grabbed Chanyeol’s head, forcing
him down into a passionate lip lock.

It was messy, but he didn't care.

They didn't.
Not when it felt so good when the older man moved his hands under Baekhyun’s shirt to
remove it, throwing it into some corner of the room. Not when their bodies grinded against
each other with every breath they took, heating up the room temperature within seconds.

It was as if a flip was switched. One second they were confessing their deepest thoughts, the
next they were having sex on the couch, leaving imprints of hands on the tender leather
material.

Baekhyun couldn't remember the last time he was treated this roughly and passionately at
once, hands gripping hair, skin and ass at one point.

It was pure bliss when a white color blessed his eyes for a second and then he calmed down
once more, hugging Chanyeol, who was heavily breathing between his legs, closely and
kissing his face all over.

Maybe it was over too quickly, or maybe he was just addicted to the man who was able to
make him scream yet not out of fear.

Nevertheless, he couldn't suppress the slight giggle that left his lips when he realized what
they had just done, and the older man joined in only moments later, soon enough pressing his
full lips onto Baekhyun’s.

" I love you, angel."

" I love you more, Chanyeol-ah.."

When Chanyeol left for the airport, Baekhyun drove him there, making sure he had
everything packed and would get some more sleep before the flight. Sure, he felt the slightest
ping within his chest, but he was also the proudest boyfriend.

The clouds were clearing up the sky the longer they drove, revealing pink and orange shades
and the sun slowly rising up the horizon. Smiling to himself, he stopped the car when they
reached the lot and helped the older man with his luggage.

Standing there in the waiting space brought back memories both would have liked to forget,
but today it was for a different occasion and nothing would overshadow that.

Hearing the announcement through the speakers, Baekhyun stood up on his tiptoes and held
tightly onto his lover, not wanting to let him go. Chanyeol wasn't any different and instead
pressed a thousand kisses all over the other's head.

" Be careful, okay? Drink and eat enough and make sure to sleep when you are supposed to
sleep. Promise me this," the brown haired man whispered against his lips, making a grin
appear on the older man's face.

Up till now, they never had to be apart for such a long time, so naturally it felt weird.
Nevertheless, seeing Baekhyun’s big eyes staring at him with such confidence made him
happy instead of sad, and he couldn't suppress the long kiss he pressed against his lips.
" I promise you, and I will make sure to call you every morning and night. This week will go
by quickly, okay?"

" Hm, I hope so. Steal their hearts, Chanyeol-ah. I believe in you," the younger replied and
gave him one more kiss, before leaning down to give him the small bag they had packed
separately, " I love you, now go."

" I love you more."

Watching him turn his back and walk towards the gate, Baekhyun couldn't suppress that he
suddenly felt sad and worried, which is why he also wasn't surprised that he teared up. And
something just overcame him when he suddenly yelled out for the older once more.

" Chanyeol, I love you!!"

It made the tall man chuckle, then Baekhyun was able to witness how he looked around the
space for a second, suddenly yelling so loudly that all heads turned his way.

" Byun Baekhyun, I love you to the moon and back. You won't win this battle of professing."

What was he supposed to do except laugh loudly. Yes, it was embarrassing, but he also was
so full of love that he couldn't care less. And the whole situation only settled in for real, when
he watched the plane leave the airport.

Taking a few more minutes to stare outside and at the sky, he breathed out a big sigh and then
walked back to their car, driving back home.

The first two days went by without a problem, they phoned in the morning and evening just
like Chanyeol had promised. It was actually so different to only hear his voice through the
phone, and it made Baekhyun miss him even more.

Their apartment suddenly seemed so big and cold, and he had to be honest and admit, it was
very difficult to get used to this. Nonetheless, he tried his best to keep his thoughts positive
and even started writing on his new book.

Wednesday marked the third day and when the evening clouds hid the moon, the phone rang
in the living room. Baekhyun practically ran out of the bathroom, only dressed in one of his
robes, his hair still wet.

Falling onto the couch comfortably, he reached for the device and swiped up, immediately
smiling when he saw Chanyeol staring into the camera.

" Oh there you are, beautiful as always."

Giggling at his words, he briefly analyzed the background, seeing many people with drinks in
their hands, and his older boyfriend actually having red cheeks.

" Babe, are you drunk?"

" M-maybe a little tiny bit? The wine here is excellent. I will buy a whole bottle just for you."

Smiling briefly and then biting his lips, he sat up a bit more and purposely let the robe slip
down his shoulder, a teasing spark in his eyes.

" You would do that for me? Oh my, I don't deserve you."

" Of course, I would. After all, you're my favorite boyfriend."

" Favorite? Do you have more than one?" Baekhyun snorted and loved witnessing the bright
giggles from the other. But his soft expression changed instantly when he noticed someone in
the background.

That said person walked closer until he had one arm over Chanyeol’s shoulder, staring right
into the camera.

" Oh, it's Baekhyun. Hi."

" S-Sehun? Why-"

There it was again, that uncomfortable squeeze of his heart. And it was worse this time
because they were miles apart from each other. Why were they together, and why was Sehun
this close to the person he shouldn't get close to?

" Chanyeol can't hold his liquor really well, huh? Don't worry, I will make sure he gets home
safely. "

Feeling his eyes twitch at his words, he sat up properly and closed his robe again, feeling
uncomfortable. However, what made him feel the worst was the fact that he couldn't control
the situation, and he couldn't see the outcome of it.

" Why are you together in the first place? Why didn't I know about this?"

" Lucky, right? I thought we wouldn't meet as well, but the event is quite big. I was invited by
a co-model."

" Baekhyun-ah, don't wo-"

" I'm gonna end the call. Sorry, I-I suddenly don't feel so good. "

Without a second thought he did exactly that and threw the phone towards the other end of
the couch. He absolutely hated this new feeling, that jealousy that ate him up more and more
with every new thought.

Just knowing that those two had something going on once, made him feel so angry and alone.
And now that he wasn't even close to them, to be able to see what's going on, he worried so
damn much.

Chanyeol was his everything, but this whole thing also made him realize that he never had to
question his loyalty.
Maybe their relationship up till now really was too perfect, maybe this was a test. He didn't
like it at all, though, and he started crying out of the blue.

Sniffing his nose, he reached for his phone again when it vibrated, only seeing a message
from the taller.

Angel, please call me again when you feel more comfortable. It's not what you think it is, I'm
sorry that I am drunk and wasn't able to properly talk to you. I want to explain the situation,
but I will wait until you're ready.

I love you. And Baekhyun-ah, I only love you.

It probably wasn't intended, but that made him cry even more. How was it possible for
someone to treat him like that?

So gentle, caring, loving.

Throughout his entire life, he had to fight with himself over many things. There were
insecurities that never really disappeared, and this was one of them.

Yes, this finally made him realize that he was actually just scared. Scared that someone could
take away Chanyeol and never return him. That Baekhyun himself wasn't enough and would
never be.

To some extent, it was good that he noticed that he had such worries rooted deep within, but
on the other hand, it was not the best moment to realize it, when he was all alone at home.

Baekhyun felt threatened by Sehun, by the fact that he also had known Chanyeol very closely
at one point. This was all new to him, the relationship, the happiness, the worries.

Actually, he thought this wouldn't happen to him, but here he was, crying his eyes out
because he was scared.

He felt bad that the older man knew exactly what was up, and he did not want him to think he
was acting pathetic or stupid. But reading his message again, there was nothing but simple
understanding.

Chanyeol cared for him no matter how stupid he was behaving, and it made him slap his own
cheeks, bringing him back to the ground of facts.

It was okay to be jealous, to be scared, but it was important to talk about it.

Walking back into the bathroom, he washed his face, unable to remove the redness of his
eyes but still being able to reduce the swelling.

It was almost ten pm, and once he was laying on their bed, specifically on Chanyeol’s side,
he called him again, nervously holding the phone up. When it got accepted, the background
had changed to that of a hotel room's and it made him frown.

" Baby, did you cry?"

" Where are you, Chanyeol-ah?" He asked and avoided the obvious, purposely staring
everywhere except the taller's eyes.

" Back in my room. After you ended the call, I excused myself and left. I drank too much
already, and I was tired."

Humming at his words, Baekhyun felt like he was also part of the reasoning, and he didn't
know if he should be happy or sad.

" But now tell me, did you cry? Your eyes are red, and I'm miles away, not able to hug you."

" A little. It's okay, I calmed down and I wanted to call you back after reading your message,
so here we are. Will you explain it to me?"

Seeing the older man briefly lay the phone down to sit comfortably on the bed, he smiled to
himself, appreciating the long black hair that was covering half of his lover's face.

" The event I was at was the one I told you about. What I didn't know was that they invited
not only artists but also musicians, models and professional dancers. Sehun actually flew
back to Paris a day before I did. He lives here, I didn't know that. So naturally we met at the
party. That is all. His behavior is often misleading, and I can imagine that you didn't like that
he touched me. I told him that once you ended the call."

There was a moment of silence, just very brief but enough to see that Chanyeol sort of felt
guilty. He shouldn't have, and it made Baekhyun realize that he was at fault for that.

" I know that what we have is new to you, and it's the only thing you know, which is why his
presence probably made you feel uncomfortable. Like I told you, I would have flipped tables
if I ever met one of your exes. I tried to keep the conversation short in the restaurant back
then, just a greeting and that's it. I'm sorry that he sat down and stayed. He also knows
Kyungsoo and Jongin, so he wanted to talk. Here at the event, we greeted each other and
briefly talked, out of respect. Making you feel the way you did, was never my intention...God
Baekhyun, you can't even imagine how much I actually love you."

" Do you want to make me cry again?" Baekhyun giggled and actually tried to hold back the
tears. Chanyeol was so genuine, so careful with his words, always fully trying to make him
feel understood and comfortable.

This had been an obstacle he alone had to take. Sooner or later, he would have experienced
this feeling and to some extent, he felt like it was a step that was needed, to completely fall
into their relationship.

The older man was everything he ever wanted, but he had to realize that nothing was perfect
and that it was normal to have bad feelings sometimes.

What made it easier, way, way easier, was that the other man was there for him. He didn't
judge, he didn't argue, he didn't fight. He understood, reassured and overcame.

" Actually, seeing you cry makes me emotional as well, so maybe not today."
" Not today? What does that mean?"

" You will see. For now, I sincerely hope I was able to ease your mind, and I can't wait to be
back and cuddle you until you beg me to stop. Just a few more days. My flight on Sunday will
be early. I will be back around 2 in the afternoon, okay?"

" Hm, okay. I will prepare food then. Make sure to not eat anything heavy because I will try
to cook something special."

Sharing some more laughter and a through screen kiss, they ended the call, leaving the
worries and bad moments behind.

It felt like Baekhyun fell even deeper into the net of trust Chanyeol had opened, and nothing
could even come close to the feeling that blossomed in his chest because of that.

On Sunday, it seemed like the weather played along with them. The sun was high up on the
horizon, sending beams of warmth onto earth. No clouds covered the blue color of the sky,
and Baekhyun momentarily got lost in the sound of the waves crashing against the shore.

They had briefly written with each other, Chanyeol informing him that he would take a cab
back home. This gave the younger man more time to refine the dinner he had planned.

Focaccia, pizza and fresh salad. Maybe a bit too much, but he didn’t care.

Baekhyun was so sincerely excited for his lover’s return that he made sure to look
appropriate as well. It was warm, so he only wore loose brown ¾ pants and a blue button up.
Humming along to the music on the radio, he recognized the song, singing along to the tunes
of I Just Called To Say I Love You .

It actually fit their situation, and that brought a smile onto his face. Being distracted while
getting the bread out of the oven, he yelped when strong arms wrapped around him from
behind, hugging him close. There were lips pressed against the side of his neck, and he
simply couldn’t stop grinning like a fool.

“ Welcome home, Chanyeol-ah,” he said and giggled when he was spun around, immediately
leaning up to kiss his lover’s lips.

“ Care to give me this dance?”

Maybe the slightest bit confused, Baekhyun placed his hand into that of the older man’s,
following his steps all around the living room. The radio played some Shawn Mendes song,
making him hum along once more, head pressed against the other’s shoulder.

To be honest, this was the last thing he would have expected, but he quite liked it.

“ Say, is there a reason you wanted to dance with me?”

Smiling at the younger’s words, Chanyeol carefully leaned him backwards, only to place a
soft kiss onto his throat, bathing in the giggles that resonated in the room. He was terribly
nervous, but he had planned something for a long time now, and he was tired of waiting.

“ What do you mean? I’m practising for our wedding.”

It was as if the world came to a halt.

The music tuned out, and all Baekhyun could focus on were the shaky hands that were
holding his waist. Slowly stopping to dance and instead standing right in front of his
boyfriend, he knew his eyes were teary, and he tried his hardest to not choke on the knot in
his throat, instead moving a hand up to cover his mouth.

“ W-What?”

Watching Chanyeol take a deep breath and getting down on one knee, the tears started to
flow, and he knew he was full on sobbing the moment the tall man opened a small box,
revealing a rosé gold ring, imitating the form of a peach blossom.

The older’s body was shaking like crazy, and even for him, it was terribly difficult to hold
back the flood of emotions, but he knew this was the right moment, he knew this was what he
had wanted to happen, which is why he looked up and reached for Baekhyun’s cold hand,
gently squeezing it between his own.

“ Baekhyun-ah, will you allow me to marry you?”

“ I-I...Yes, a thousand times yes,” Baekyhun replied in a shaky voice and fell down to his
knees, not even looking at how Chanyeol slipped the ring onto his finger, instead falling head
first into his chest, wetting the shirt he was wearing with his warm tears, “ You’re crazy, Park
Chanyeol.”

“ If you mean crazy for you, then yes.”

Licking over his salty lips, the younger man reached for both of the other’s hands, gently
caressing them and feeling how nervous he actually was. Who would have thought this might
happen?

The food was probably burning in the oven, but who cared? Nothing was more important
than this moment they both shared.

“ Did you plan to surprise me like that?”

“ Hm, actually no. I planned it differently, but when I saw you there, standing in the kitchen
and slightly swaying to the music, I just couldn’t wait any longer,” Chanyeol explained, and
he enjoyed seeing the face of his lover turn as red as tomatoes. Every second that he worried
about was worth it in the end, and he couldn’t be any happier. That was probably also the
thing that finally made him let some tears drop down his cheeks, the warmth of it making him
shiver.

“ Baby, don’t cry…”

“ It’s just...I never loved anyone as much as I love you. You can’t imagine how happy I am
right now.”

Grinning at his statement, Baekhyun hugged him close and kissed his head, just holding that
giant of a man between his legs until he calmed down as well.

And it also made him wonder why he even worried like he did. After all, he was Chanyeol’s
and Chanyeol was his, now and forever.

Winter

It was hectic.

Guests were slowly filling the small hall they had rented, covered in peach blossoms and
white roses. Loud chattering and soft laughter which certainly did not calm down Baekhyun’s
nerves.

He was sitting in front of a huge mirror, with Kyungsoo behind him finishing the last touches
on his brown hair, the braids carrying small white petals. It was the same color as the suit he
had bought.

A winter wedding, something they both had always dreamed of. Snow was covering the
streets outside just lightly and decorating the glass windows that let the light of the sun shine
inside. Staring down at his fingers, he smiled seeing the engagement ring, and he only
snapped out of his thoughts when his friend gently touched his shoulder.

“ You’re done, Baekhyun-ah. Are you ready?”

“ Yes and no. I feel like I’m going to throw up any second from nervousness,” he admitted
and giggled when Kyungsoo pinched his sides. It helped to distract him momentarily, and he
got up when Jongin waltzed into the room, announcing that everything was prepared.

It was a crazy feeling, to know that just in mere minutes he would be married to the love of
his life, and it only got real when he walked into the hallway, his father guiding him. His
parents were accepting of their relationship before all of this, but they fell for Chanyeol as
well, the first time they met him so this day, indeed, was special to them as well.

Smiling up at his father, Baekhyun finally turned his focus on the opening doors, and the
moment he spotted Chanyeol sobbing at the isle, he also teared up. God, they truly were a
bunch of emotional babies.

Nevertheless, they continued to walk until the young man stepped up the stairs to stand in
front of his fiancé. Immediately reaching for the taller’s hand, he squeezed it within his own,
a small smile grazing over his glossy lips.

“ Hi, beautiful.”

“ Hi, handsome.”
The guests were cooing while both of them were engaged only within their own bubble until
they were interrupted by the pastor starting the ceremony. It was calm yet exciting to both of
them especially when it came to their vows.

Baekhyun was first, and he knew they said they wouldn’t do anything crazy, but the things he
wrote still were making him tear up all over again.

“ Chanyeol-ah, we had a rough start, didn’t we? I admire that you never gave up on me, and
that you always reassured me that we would last. I know, sometimes my insecurities may tire
you out, but you never fail to make me realize just why I have fallen for you. Those days and
nights we spent together will never equal the amount of love I have for you, never compare to
the amount of smiles you bring onto my lips and never win against the kisses you place onto
my nose. I did not know what love was until I met you. You are the reason why I am the
happiest I’ve ever been, and you are the reason why I never want this feeling to end. I love
you, every goddamn part of you, and I am grateful that I am allowed to love you, to hold you,
to kiss you. You’re my everything, Chanyeol-ah, and you will always be.”

It was difficult to read everything out loud without crying, and he knew his face was wet
when Chanyeol gently dried the tears with his thumbs, his own eyes red from all the crying
he had done. The room was quiet, but Baekhyun could see that almost everyone was holding
back their emotions, and he simply wasn’t ready for the other’s vow.

“ Baekhyun-ah, I actually never told you this, but you saved me. You are the reason I found
inspiration for my work, you are the reason for the continous giggles that leave my lips, and
you are possibly the only one that ever made me cry out of love. I know just saying that I
love you every day won’t ever be enough to equal the actual love I feel for you, but I will
make sure that every day will be the best for you. I promised you loyalty, trust, and endless
comfort, and I will make sure you will never feel any of those things missing. You are all I
need and all I will ever want. You’re my sun, my moon, my waves that crash the shore. You
are part of everything I see, think about, talk about. You are a part of me, and you will always
be. I love you, Baekhyun, more than you can imagine, more than you will ever know.”

Well, if he had been crying while saying his own vow, he now was full on sobbing into his
hand, not caring about the fact that he was ruining his makeup. Right in front of him stood
the man of his dreams, promising him everything he had ever dreamed about, and he just
waited for the pastor to tell them they were allowed to kiss before jumping into Chanyeol’s
arms, lips pressing messily all over the other’s.

Their guests were howling and clapping their hands, but all they could focus on were
themselves and the fact that they were officially married.

“ Thank you for loving me, Yeol,” he whispered while the older man still held him up, and he
giggled against his mouth when Chanyeol carefully sat him back down to kiss his lips
properly once more.

“ Thank you for loving me, Pesco.”

They celebrated their love with good food, good music, and amazing friends, making sure
everyone was having fun and being a part of the evening.
 What probably left an impact, though, was when Baekhyun threw the small flower bracelet
he had been wearing, instead of a bouquet, watching Kyungsoo catch it, and Jongin spinning
him around soon after that.

It was perfect, everything about this and while everyone else celebrated, Chanyeol kidnapped
Baekhyun to the beach, only to stand in front of the water and watch the last bit of the sun go
down.

They were hugging each other, the younger’s head against his husband’s shoulder, the waves
being the only sound between them, and it was that moment that they realized that this was it.

This was what they had wanted, actually everything they ever needed.

They were each other’s, promised for a lifetime and they were looking forward to the future
they were allowed to plan together.

The End ( for real now)

Chapter End Notes

So here we are❤

As you know now, baek had his insecurities and I wanted to work them out. No
relationship is perfect and I wanted him to realize that in the most mature way. Fighting
does not suit them, talking it out was the solution.

Jealousy is normal, it is nothing to worry about but I wanted him to realize that he is
able to feel negative things as well!

I hope you liked the way yeol handled it. He is perfect in the main story, he shouldn't be
any different now. If you love someone unconditionally, you accept all of them. And he

😎
does this. Also wanted to once again point out the difference between him and Jiwoo,
especially during the restaurant scene. I hope some of u caught that

About the wedding, well, usually I don't like those type of endings but their love story
was the best one I ever wrote. I wanted it to end a beautiful way, to give an outlook in
the future of their fictional relationship.

They will always be together and now they are vowed to do such. I wanted them to be
able to call each other husbands, so here we are.

I send love to all of you, may you always be healthy and happy ❤
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