SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS SPEC SCRIPT POP ART/MUSTACHIO By ASCOT SMITH

ASCOT SMITH aj@ascotjsmith.com 2012

INT. CITY HALL DAY SPONGEBOB stands on stage as the MAYOR of BIKINI BOTTOM presents him the key to the city. The crowd applauds. MAYOR SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS, as MAYOR of BIKINI BOTTOM I bestow upon you the key to the city for all of your achievements as the greatest bubble blower in the universe! SPONGEBOB blows into his BUBBLE WAND creating a giant THANK YOU! bubble. The crowd goes crazy. CITY HALL begins to shake and the roof is suddenly ripped off! POSEIDON, God of the seas, stands over City Hall. POSEIDON I have come for the one they call SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Um, thats me. POSEIDON SPONGEBOB! Can I have an autograph? SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS I dont know, let me think about it POSEIDON I command you to give me an autograph, and to be my best friend! SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Um, still not sure... POSEIDON Pleeeeeease! SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS OK! SPONGEBOB uses his bubble blowing wand to create a horse.

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Tally ho! SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS rides to POSEIDEN whenMR. KRABS SPONGEBOB! The DREAM goes POP! INT. KRUSTY KRABS KITCHEN DAY SPONGEBOB wakes up from his daydream behind the burger fry stove. MR. KRABS enters the kitchen. MR. KRABS Ive been getting complaints that all the food is covered in soap. Knock it off, SPONGEBOB! SPONGEBOB sends out an order to a customer sitting at a nearby table. Each layer of food - bottom bun, patty, lettuce, tomato, cheese, top bun - is delivered on a bubble. The burger hovers on the tray with a bubble between each layer and then POP, POP, POP, POP, POP; the KRABY PATTY collapses together. The Customer rolls his eyes and gives a sarcastic slow clap. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Sorry MR. KRABS, Im training for the Bikini Bottom Bubble competition. I have to spend every second working on my bubble skills so I can be just like ESTOBAN RIVERS, the worlds greatest bubble blower! SPONGEBOB swoons over a poster of ESTOBAN RIVER, a very serious looking octopus holding a bubble wand. MR. KRABS I told you no posters in the kitchen; its unsanitary! Im not paying you to blow bubbles. This is a serious business and we cant have customers complainin.
2

As MR. KRABS complains different animal shaped bubbles float by his face. MR. KRABS SPONGEBOB quit it with the bubbles! SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS But you never even told me if I can have the day off. Ive put the request in the mail slot every day for the past year. Cut to: Mail slot at MR. KRABSs door. SPONGEBOB puts a request in the mail slot, which shoots straight into a paper shredder. MR. KRABS Youre me best employee and its just too busy here, lad. A TUMBLEWEED rolls through the empty fast food joint and hits SQUIDWARD in the face. SQUIDWARD enters the kitchen pulling tumbleweed bits from his face. SQUIDWARD Bubble blowing is for kids, anybody can do it. Look, its simple. You dip the wand and blow. SQUIDWARD blows and nothing happens. He dips again and no bubbles. SQUIDWARD dips again and blows really hard spraying MR KRABS and SPONGBOB in the face with his spit. SQUIDWARD Its broken, apparently. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Oh SQUIDWARD, youre so silly. Let me give it a try. SPONGEBOB dips the wand a gives a very small blow into the wand. A bubble instantly fills the kitchen. SQUIDWARD and MR KRABS are held against the ceiling. SQUIDWARD Mr. Krabs.

MR. KRAB SPONGEBOB you are excused from work for the day. EXT. RENTAL HALL DAY A banner on the front of the building says WELCOME BUBBLERS to the LOCAL BUBBLE BLOWING COMPETETION TRY OUTS INT. BUBBLE BLOWING COMPETETION/SCHOOL STAGE DAY Two young fish and SPONGEBOB stand on stage. The first child blows a lopsided bubble. Three judges sitting at a table raise number card: 4, 5, and another 4. FISH JUDGE Next. SPONGEBOB brings his wand to his lips whenAn OCTOPUS with a pencil-thin mustache in a turtleneck blows a large bubble with a series of smaller bubbles. The smaller bubbles act like moons circling the larger bubble. GIRL FISH COMPETITOR Is it really him? BOY FISH COMPETITOR Can it beSPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS ESTOBAN RIVERS! ESTOBAN As you can see I have a clear understanding of technique. My bubble is perfect in every regard. DensityThe gravity of the LARGE BUBBLE gets stronger and picks one of the competitors up off the ground and PULLS her into its orbit. A judge gives a 9. ESTOBAN Surface quality, reflectionA stage light bounces from the bubble into the other child competitors eyes.
4

BOY FISH COMPETITOR Ah! My eyes! The second judge gives another 9. ESTOBAN And of course circumference, its shapeThe giant bubble turns revealing SPONGEBOB holding on to it. The judges give an exclamation point! The bubble pops! SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS (giddily) ESTOBAN RIVERS, youre amazing. ESTOBAN Oh great. A fan. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS ESTOBAN, youre the greatest. SPONGEBOB blows a bubble of himself and ESTOBAN doing a high-five, surrounded by hearts. ESTOBAN Never have I seen such an amazing displaySPONGEBOB eyes start to widen. ESTOBAN Of spectacularlySPONGEBOB gets more excited. ESTOBAN Overwhelmingly, completely mindblowinglySPONGEBOB is exploding at the seams. ESTOBAN STUPIDNESS! SPONGEBOB instantly deflates sinking into a pool of yellow ooze. ESTOBAN dips his wand into SPONGEBOB goop and blows a yellow bubble.
5

ESTOBAN I hate amateurs. ESTOBAN pops the bubble. SPONGEBOBs sad face smacks against the wall and drips down. The judges give the dis perfect 10s. EXT. RENTAL HALL NIGHT SPONGEBOB exits the competition, weeping. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS I wish I could just blow myself into bubble and float away so one will ever have to see me again. An older looking fish with a white beard, MASTER WANDSMITH approaches SPONGEBOB. MASTER WANDSMITH Do not cry, Little Wet Spongy Pants. SPONGEBOB Huh? My pants are only soggy from the bubbles, I promise. MASTER WANDSMITH ESTOBAN once enjoyed the thrills of bubble blowing like you. He has since turned his back on the true art of bubble blowing. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS You knew ESTOBAN? MASTER WANDSMITH I was his mentor, MASTER WANDSMITH. You can beat him, Young Damp Rectangle Boy. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS But how? MASTER Because, Yellow Crusty Slacks, I will train you.

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Uh, my name is SPONGEBOB, but yeah! INT. ANCIENT BUBBLE TRAINING LAIR NIGHT SPONGEBOB walks down a long corridor with MASTER WANDSMITH. Along the hall is a series of portraits of historic bubble blowers. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Wow, the ancient hall of bubble artists. MASTER points to a painting of CAVEMAN blowing a bubble through a hole in a leaf. MASTER Yes, all of these masters have sought one thing. The perfect bubble. They pass by a painting of a FISH NAPOLEON with one hand in jacket, blowing a bubble. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS A perfect bubble? The two stop at a portrait of ESTOBAN. MASTER And no one has ever achieved it. Many have tried and failed. But you will learn. You will master their techniques! You will train! BUBBLE BLOWING TRAINING MONTAGE -SPONGEBOB lifts a barbell with bubbles as weights. A bubble pops and the barbell falls, pinning him. -MASTER WANDSMITH blows a series of bubbles shaped like a pile of bricks. SPONGEBOB karate chops the pile and bounces off. -SPONGEBOB runs up the Temple stairs with a barrel of soap solution strapped to his back.

-MASTER WANDSMITH blows a series of bubbles shaped has bricks, planks of wood, and other chop-able objects. SPONGEBOB chops and kicks them all! POP! POP! POP! -SPONGEBOB blows harder and harder into his wand. MASTER WANDSMITH is running out of breath blowing too. We see bubble version of SPONGEBOB and MASTRER arm wrestling. SPONGEBOB wins! -MASTER presents SPONGEBOB a hand-crafted wooden case. It glows with anticipation. He opens the case to find a pink bubble wand. SPONGEBOB holds the wand above his head and a ray of light fills the room! EXT. RENTAL HALL - DAY TRANS-ATLANTIC BUBBLE BLOWING COMPETETION TODAY ONLY reads on a banner. INT. RENTAL HALL - DAY The competition is full for the final event. A child competitor blows a bubble shaped like a star. The judges give it 6,7,7. JUDGE Next please. ESTOBAN enters the stage and crowd gives applause. ESTOBAN takes a bow. ESTOBAN blows a bubble creating a square. The crowd responds with OOOHs! FISH CROWD Very unique. Sophisticated. The JUDGES present the scores: 8, 7, 8. SPONGEBOB enters the stage. SPONGEBOB Not so fast ESTOBAN. He blows creating a horse that jumps over the square. The crowd responds with AHHHs! FISH CROWD Its a pony! Look at it jump! Adorable!

The JUDGES lift their score cards: 8, 8, and another 8. ESTOBAN Grrr. ESTOBAN blows another bubble: a multisided shape. FISH CROWD Wow! More sides! Can you believe it? The JUDGES gives ESTOBAN a 9,8,8. SPONGEBOB creates a puppy that plays with the shape. The crowd is further smitten. FISH CROWD Awww, its so cute! SPONGEBOB Giggle, giggle. ESTOBAN Enough! SPONGEBOB, prepare yourself for the artistic excitement of the OCTOBUBBLE technique! ESTOBAN unsheathes wands for each of his tentacles. SPONGEBOB Gasp! ESTOBAN begins twirling his arms and blowing from his multiple wands creating a series of cubes and shapes. SPONGEBOB Ahhh! SPONGEBOB looks around, desperate, and sees a LARGE TUB OF BUBBLE FLUID. He grabs it pouring the fluid over himself. He takes in a deep breath, growing bigger and bigger. And then releases! From all the different crevasses and holes in SPONGBOBs spongy body blows a massive bubble: a giant adorable kitten. The CROWD gives their biggest AHHH!. The kitten plays with the shapes and then POP! The JUDGES give SPONGEBOB three 9s!

SPONGEBOB tries to catch his breath. ESTOBAN puts away his multiple wands. SPONGEBOB Whew! That was fun! ESTOBAN SPONGEBOB, you have fallen for my trap. You are clearly exhausted, and now cannot defend against my final weapon! ESTOBAN unsheathes a shiny black bubble wand! Close up on the side the wand it reads: MEGA BUBBLE WAND 2000! BLOW WITH CAUTION. SPONGEBOB Gasp! Limited edition bubble wand! ESTABON begins running at SPONGEBOB. A stream of shapes pours from the wand. SPONGEBOB runs toward ESTABON with his wand, cute animals pour from his wand. ESTABON yells getting closer! SPONGBOB yells getting even closer! And it cuts back and forth between the two until! The wands cross and begin to glow! EXT. RENTAL HALL DAY In the distance the roof of the Rental Hall explodes off as a giant bubble mushroom cloud appears and then POP! INT. RENTAL HALL DAY SPONGEBOB and ESTABON lay on stage exhausted from the bubble-splosion. PATRICK walks on stage. PATRICK Heh, heh bubbles are fun. Patrick blows a bubble. Its perfect! A heavenly awe is heard. A rainbow of color shines from the perfect bubble. SPONGEBOB Its a perfect bubble!

10

SPONGEBOB and ESTOBAN eyes widen in amazement. ESTABON Its, itsESTOBAN begins into sobbing. ESTOBAN Beautiful! The JUDGES give the bubble a perfect 10. GRUMPY LOOKING FISH Whatever. Its just a bubble. The perfect bubble floats away landing on the head of the grumpy looking fish spectator. FISH SPECTATOR Dude why did you even show up? GRUMPY LOOKING FISH Because I, IThe GRUMPY LOOKING FISH begins to sob. GRUMPY LOOKING FISH I have nowhere else to go! The CROWD rushed PATRICK on stage. EXCITED FANS Hes amazing! A genius! A true master! PATRICK I just blow and things happen. Ha-yuk. The Judges presents hand PATRICK an impressive GREATEST BUBBLE EVER ARTIST trophy. EXT. RENTAL HALL - NIGHT SPONGEBOB and ESTOBAN watch as PATRICK is carried off his Crowd of fans. SPONGEBOB blows a bubble shaped like a heart at ESTOBAN. POP! CUT TO BLACK. THE END.
11

INT. BATHROOM NIGHT (LIVE ACTION) A HANDSOME PIRATE stands looking in a bathroom mirror as a BEAUTIFUL WOMAN combs his long wavy hair. BEAUTIFUL WOMAN Oh my darling. I wish I could have your hair. Its so long and beautiful. Tell me your secret. HANDSOME PIRATE A buccaneer never gives away the treasure map. Now lets get back to brushing me hairrr. The HANDSOME PIRATE flicks his hair and unknowingly knocks over a bottle of INCREDIBLE HULKING HAIR TONIC into the sink. Whoops! INT. SINK NIGHT (BACK TO ANIMATION) The glowing tonic continues down the drain intoINT. SEWER - NIGHT The TONIC continues through the sewer, a nearby rodent is splashed and instantly grows a set of bangs. The TONIC continuesEXT. OCEAN NIGHT The glowing TONIC enters the ocean. A WHALE comes up for air and has a giant mohawk. A group of DOLPHINS emerge from the water, each with a different haircut. They all laugh and point at the dolphin with ear hair, who crosses his flippers and pouts. The TONIC continuesEXT. BIKINI BOTTOM - NIGHT The glowing TONIC, now a single line of formula is pulled through the ocean currents past the city and intoINT. SPONGEBOBS PINEAPPLE HOME - NIGHT SPONGEBOB lays asleep and breathes in the remaining tonic. He snorts it all in and sneezes. A bubble of TONIC rises from his nose and pops; a sprinkle of hair covers the room.
12

INT. SPONGEBOBs HOME MORNING The air-horn alarm clock goes off and SPONGEBOB jumps out bed and rushes into the bathroom. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Yipee! Time to start the day, everything is gonna be a-okay! He looks in the mirror. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Ahhh!! SPONGEBOB sees a perfectly groomed mustache has grown on his face overnight. SPONGEBOB is cautious to touch it. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS GARY? There is a bug on my face! Careful Spongebob, it could be friendly. Must be very careful. Get it off! Get it off! GARY enters the bathroom. GARY Meow. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS The bug, it grew on me? GARY Meow. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Thats silly, GARY. I cant grow a mustache. Im just a kid. GARY Meow. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS What, I guess it does kinda look good on me. GARY Meow.
13

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Handsome? Well, no. GARY quit kidding around. Time to take action into my own hands! SPONGEBOB shaves the mustache and it grows back almost instantly. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Ah! He tries shaving again and it GROWS back FASTER. Again and again and again. An alarm goes off and SPONGEBOB looks up at his clock - the clock is divided between WORKING and WAITING FOR WORK. The short hand nears WORKING. SPONGEBOB Oh no GARY, Im gonna be late for work. GARY Meow. EXT. SPONGEBOBs HOUSE SPONGEBOB hurries out the door. As he rushes, he hears the sound of hair growing above his eyebrows. POOF! SPONGEBOB notices he has a thick set of eyebrows. SPONGEBOB AHH! A Slacker-looking fish wearing big black sunglasses driving an ice-cream truck notices SPONGEBOB. SLACKER FISH Killer facial hair, dude. The slacker crashes into a rock. The black glasses land at SPONGEBOBs feet. SLACKER FISH Oh man, my frozen treats. Whatever. SPONGEBOB puts on the black sunglasses. SPONGEBOB Whew!
14

SPONGEBOB notices hair has grown suddenly on his back. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS AHH! AHH! A BARRACUDA BIKER riding by notices SPONGEBOB looking awesome with his black sunglasses and mustache. BARRACUDA BIKER Whoa, hombre. The BARRACUDA BIKER smashes into the ice cream truck wreckage. The biker jacket lands at SPONGEBOBs feet. BARRACUDA BIKER/SLACKER FISH Nice stache. EXT. CITY STREETS - DAY Citizens stop what theyre doing and watch SPONGEBOB walk by. He looks SUPER-COOL with the sunglasses, biker jacket, and mustache. SPONGEBOB, behind his glasses, sweats nervously. CATFISH CITIZEN WhoaMINOW CITIZEN So dangerous, So manly SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Oh no, everyone is looking. Just. Need. To. Get. To. work. A FISH CITIZEN grabs a payphone and dials. FISH CITIZEN I wanna call in a mustache sighting; its amazing! INT. KRUSTY KRABS DAY SPONGEBOB slams the door shut behind him and stands panting. He looks up and the patrons at the restaurant have stopped eating to stare at him.

15

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Whew. FEDERAL AGENTS swing in on ropes and SMASH through the restaurants windows. They land and immediately start speaking on their walkie-talkies. The multiple agents echo the protocol: COPY AREA CLEAR, COPY, WE COPY, YOU COPY. YEAH I COPY, COPY, ANOTHER COPY. SENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT Just look at him. Tough guy. Think you can break the rules. Where is your license for that burly facial growth? SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS I, I, I left it in my other pants? MR. KRABS bursts in from his back office. MR. KRABS What is going here? SPONGEBOB get out of that costume and get back to work! SENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT Sir, are you aware that you have an unlicensed mustache on your premises? MR. KRABS Hes my best worker! I dont care if he comes in with a pirates beard. Spongebob dont come in with a beard, its unsanitary. Whats the big deal? Its just a little hair? SENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT A little hair! Before the Oceanic Facial Hair Agency, our underwater paradise was in chaos. BIKINI BOTTOM was a tangled mess. Sideburns growing into muttonchops, goatees growing into beards, it was a disaster. Facial hair is a serious business, people can get hurt.

16

EXT. BIKINI BOTTOM NIGHT Hair covers the city, growing out of every window tangled into a giant mess. CITIZENS everywhere with mustaches, beards, goatees, and wild sideburns, are all trapped in each others facial hair. MR. KRABS Them were the days. So what are you gonna do hun! ?? SENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT Undocumented mustaches require the employer to pay an extended payroll tax, a barber tax, an overall fuzzy lip taxDollars signs in MR. KRABS eyes spin saying NO SALE. He slaps a NOW HIRING sign on the front door and waddles back to his office. The AGENTS unsheathe their laser-sighted fish nets. Lasersights zero in on SPONGEBOB. SENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT Mustache removal protocol activate. The SENIOR OFFICER pulls out an electric razor and shaves SPONGEBOBs mustache. It reappears; the officer upset tries again, again, and again. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Heh. Heh. That tickles. SENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT Ah! Officers time to take him in for serious extraction. SPONGEBOB has a thought balloon and imagines the AGENTS discovering his back hair and laughing at him. AGENT What is that, a bathmat? The thought bubble pops. SPONGEBOB makes a break for it!

17

SENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT AGENTS target is loose! I repeat, target is loose. Do you copy? The previous COPY gag starts up again SPONGEBOB quickly hides in a mailbox as he watches the AGENTS run by. SPONGEBOB slides out through the mail slot and into a back alleyway. EXT. ALLEYWAY DAY SPONGBOB nervously walks through the empty alley way. VOICE FROM SHADOWS SPONGEBOB we have been looking for you. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Shreik! Whos there? FOUR older fish with different styles of facial hair exit from the shadows. BEARDED ELDER TROUT Do not be frightened young sponge; we are the Elder Crustaceans of Hair Freedom. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Oooo. Neat. FRENCHY MUSTACHE FLOUNDER Eh mustache like yours comes elong unce in a lifetime. Time to enjoy et. SOULPATCH SALMON Youre like us daddy-o. With that real jazzy mustache. I really dig, you know. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS You like to dig? Treasure hunting is so much fun. Gasp! Are you guys pirates? Is that what that smell is? BEARDED ELDER TROUT Uh.

18

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS You sail the seas?! Have you fought a KRAKEN? Are you rich with gold and treasure! Am I your hostage? Please say yes! BEARDED ELDER TROUT Um. SOULPATCH SALMON We need more people in our facial hair club, but what is his deal? FRENCHY MUSTACHE FLOUNDER I dont know about tis one. BEARDED ELDER TROUT SPONGEBOB you can be one of us. No more troubles, just hang out. We are rich with friends. We sail the seas of good times. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Huh? SOULPATCH SALMON Sponge Bobby be cool. Just relax with us. You dont need to work for the man. BEARDED ELDER TROUT Let your mustache be free. A thought balloon appears above SPONGEBOBs head. He sees himself as an aging hippie with a long beard entering a restaurant. CUSTOMER P.U. What is that smell! HOSTESS Hey, can you read?! The hostess points SPONGEBOBs stinky sandals and then a sign by the door: No Shoes, No Service. HIPPIE SPONGEBOB Oh man. Peace out.
19

The thought bubble pops. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Ohhhh. I dunno guys I kinda like going to work. BEARDED ELDER TROUT SPONGEBOB you have to let go. Let go about work and your troubles, just let out whats going on in the inside, man. What does your mustache say? SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Well it tickles. SPONGEBOB focuses and his mustache wiggles on its own. BEARDED ELDER TROUT Yes! SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS You mean like this? SPONGEBOB uses his mustache as a jump rope. BEARDED ELDER TROUT No, not reallySPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Or do you mean like this? SPONGEBOB connects his mustache with the BEARDED ELDER and the other FISH bounce off their beards using it as a trampoline. BEARDED ELDER TROUT No SPONGEBOBSPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS How about this? SPONGEBOB makes a swing with his mustache and spins around a light pole. BEARDED ELDER TROUT No! SPONGEBOB, not like that!

20

A spotlight from a helicopter interrupts SPONGEBOB. The AGENTS climb down ropes from the sides of the buildings surrounding SPONGEBOB and the others. SOULPATCH SALMON Oh man its the man, man (beat) man. SENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT The jig is up. Hold on, is it the jig or gig is up? AGENT Its jig, sir. SENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT The jig is up! Only law-abiding facial hair on my watch. BEARDED ELDER TROUT Keep your law off may face young dude. SENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT Keep your face off my law old man. The AGENTS aim their nets and ELDERS point their facial hair readying for a showdown. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS This hair business is really getting serious. I wonder if there is anything else going on right now? INSERT TITLE: MEANWHILE INT. BATHROOM NIGHT (LIVE ACTION) The empty bottle of hair tonic sits in the sink. The HANDSOME PIRATE holds the remainder of his hair in his hands. His bald head glows in the light. BEAUTIFUL WOMAN So youre saying that if you dont keep applying this hair tonic your hair goes back to normal.

21

HANDSOME PIRATE It be all gone! With my hulking hair tonic gone so is me hairrrr! My wonderful hairrr! BEAUTIFUL WOMAN I knew it wasnt real! HANDSOME PIRATE sobs: RRR! RRR! RRR! The beautiful woman begins hitting him over his bald head with the empty bottle. EXT. ALLEYWAY DAY SPONGEBOBs mustache vanishes in a POOF OF DUST. The eyebrows, the back hair POOF GONE! SPONGEBOB Ta-Da! FRENCHY MUSTACHE FLOUNDER Noh. The mustache is dead. SENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT Team disengage. The mustache is(beat) No more. AGENTS (moping) Ahh, man. Do you copy? I copy. You copy? I Copy, I guess SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Im sorry guys. I know you were really excited about hanging out. Im late for work. A TEEN FISH with stubble coming in above his lip walks by. SENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT (speaking into walkie-talkie) Agents I spot a 3-15, I repeat a 3-15. Calling in back up! Hey kid! You better have provisional license for that prebeard?

22

BEARDED ELDER TROUT (Chasing after teen) Hey young fella, have you ever thought about joining a groovy hair club? TEEN FISH WhaSENIOR MUSTACHE AGENT Team. We have some new mustaches to tame. AGENTS Yeay! The AGENTS and the ELDERS rush after the TEEN FISH off the frame leaving SPONGEBOB by himself. INT. KRUSY KRABS KITCHEN DAY SPONGEBOB is back at work flipping burgers. SPONGEBOB looks around mischievously. He applies a burger patty in shape of mustache to his face. MR KRABS (OFF SCREEN) SPONGEBOB! SPONGEBOB giggles to himself with his pretend meat mustache. CUT TO BLACK THE END

23