Italics = Lift / Raise / Airy Emphesis

Underline = Deapth / Drop / Conclusive

Bold = Slow / Intense Emphasis

Bold italics = Intense / Quiet yell

[TITLE SLIDE]

Lets explore the life of a boy, [SLIDE 1]

an unintelligent child,

not unintelligent in the typical sense of the word. Hes actually very smart for his age. He shares

the same name, and body as me-- its just a little smaller-- but he holds an ignorance that

separates his existence from mine immeasurably more than the physical differences. You could

argue that many preschoolers were more intelligent than me, even with the years of experience I

held on my short leather belt.

Most children are very straightforward, youre boring, youre mean, youre fun, youre weird.

Theres no merit to hanging out with anyone if they dont make you laugh, or distract you for

lunch time. Thats exactly how its supposed to be.

If you must change yourself or find something other than this makes me happy as a reason to

hang out with your friends, its not what I can now see as a good relationship. I was ever only

exposed to fun in exchange for a change in attitude, or just no fun, which was no fun. Worst of

all I didnt even know that this was a problem, I just assumed it was normal. Cursed by these

thoughts I hung out with friends who either saw me as a clown, or never even saw me for me,

neither were optimal.

my fathers side worked at a dive shop where he made a small fortune, while my moms side was

crammed into sardine can of a home. I was clean and tidy, played on my own a lot and was a

mamas boy, who literally followed in her footsteps, vacuuming and cleaning like I saw her do.

When I turned four and my little brother was born, my father was informed that the stress of

working was causing severe health problems and that he should take a break.

We listened to the doctor, and moved away from the family and California to Dallas

Texas.[SLIDE 3] We bought a house at least twice as big as our house in California at a fraction

of the cost. We could play inside as if it were outside, and had a backyard big enough for a

monster truck derby.

Here,

I made the first friends I can remember.

The two brothers who lived next to us were the closest Id come to having a healthy friendship

for the first.

and last time years. They were rowdy. and telling by how many toys they had scattered in their

massive upstairs bedroom, spoiled to the teeth. We would walk to each others houses when our

parents allowed, and We played the way we wished. even if we didnt agree on how to play

sometimes, we all had our way at some point. This was the year or two. where I was the most

spoiled.

on christmas I got myself a go cart and all the toys I asked for; I still own most of them to this

day.

But most of all

Ill never forget Alex and Jamie. We were free to be ourselves and I had taken a taste... of

friendship's addiction.[SLIDES 4] My hypothalamus, once only used to rewarding my own

company, was now feeding me dose after dose of dopamine. Soon enough I would be

permanently attached to the drug, that is, social interaction.

After one or two years the family moved to an even bigger two story house, still in dalas. This

house didnt come as easy as the last one, it was a fixer-upper. My dad taught himself how to

work on houses, from the plumbing and tilework to carpentry and demolition. With his new

talents he made me and my brother a fort, on a small plot of concrete made for a doghouse in the

backyard. It was the perfect fort.

My new neighbor was very involved in my life. I still remember his name, Cory, and considered

him my best friend at the time. He was big into football, military role play and guns in general, a

bonafide Texan Id say. The older kids on the block and I would spend all of our free time

outside. I used to be really extra tall for my age, I was taller than people four years older than me

creating a false scale of maturity. While I lived here I was in first and second grade while my

friends were in fifth or sixth, generally their idea of fun was more organized and mature than

mine. I had no problem playing on my own before I had met the two boys at the last house, but

now that Id had a sample of what its like playing with friends I couldnt so easily go to total

solitude. Playing with my older friends was not a waste of my time, I would never consider it so,

but I had to work for it. While I played with my friends I was painfully ignorant of the
terminologies and logistics of what we played. You could tell I wasnt into military role play and

I for sure didnt have half the patience required.

I had to change my mannerisms and act older than I was to have fun with these friends

or be the clown.

Sometimes I got hurt.

Id be left out because I wasnt quite the right guy for the game or I just wasnt the age

demographic. I cried a lot more than them and was less physical.

This wasnt the same kind of friendship Id had with the two neighbors from before, I had to

conform to my friends game in order to have any fun, it never came naturally. And since the day

I moved away, I havent seen any of them.

In 2008, my grandfather on my dads side was diagnosed with ALS or Lou Gehrigs disease. The

same disease that Stephen Hawking has, but my granddudes case was much more severe. My

family packed up its bags and moved back to California. Before we relocated, we grabbed a 23

by 6 foot motorhome and drove in a massive circle around our country

Then we again

We finally parked our tiny residence in my moms moms driveway. Wed spend the next three

years visiting my granddude in mexico, meanwhile I attended third through sixth grade at Valley

Vista Elementary

When in Texas, I had never stayed at one school for more than a year, so I never had friends

from school. When I was injected into my school in third grade I was on the lookout for friends,

because I had none. Without friends to play with, and the close company of my parents, I fell

into a frantic desire for SOMEONE to be with. The first people I met at school were the soccer
players, we were chill. I played with them almost every day. Lunch time was all well and good,

but in class and the lunch tables I hung out with what I can now describe as the worst people for

me. They werent mean, rebellious, or anything like that, they were just much more relaxed and a

little judgmental. Meanwhile, you could describe me as the tasmanian devil. I was loud,

obnoxious and how they would say it, weird. I hung with them for what was essentially three

whole years. Its funny, even though I thought these were my best friends, now that I look back,

the people I saw in class were much more fun to talk to, but I never caught the hint.

Keep in mind, even a bad friend is a friend. While we hung out I had all of these repressed ideas

in my head Id wanted to just spit out all over these peoples faces, but that wouldn't be very

nice. I sometimes let it slip, and I ended up being the laughing stock of the group, Brandon,

where did that come from youre so weird. I was pretty weird, to most people. Thank god

soccer existed, if I hung out with my friends lunch Im pretty sure Id end up feeling bullied.

I still remember the blue skies and rusling trees of that fateful day in the middle of sixth grade

I didnt want to play soccer, quite the unusual occurrence; I almost never wanted to play

anything but soccer, today I decided to keep to myself and wallow. I sulked around and waddled

around the bland sandy desert on the side of the recess ground. Here walking around the barren

flat I bumped into some guy. He was a tall, also walking along the sand, just not so sad like. He

walked because he liked it; he enjoyed the silence that the far off batting cages ensued and the

crunch of the gravel. I dont remember why or when we started talking, but soon enough most of

my free time was spent walking the dusty field with my new friend, Carlos. [SLIDE 5]
At this point in my life, I had what can only be described as an overactive imagination. I wasnt

ever jumping off the walls, but my thoughts were. So when I walked back and forth across the

fenced border of our school every day with my equally active friend, its safe to say I was very

content. My brain had finally reached what it had wanted and before I knew it I was once again

reminded of that strange addiction friendship is. I can confidently say this was the most

important part of my life but I dont really remember many details. What I do remember were

our embarrassing conversations about making a youtube channel. We thought we could be the

awesome dudes spelled OSUM DOODS. Osumdoods@gmail.com is my personal email to this

very day, and my current youtube channel is under the same google account. Ive never tried to

be friends with Carlos and thats why it was so good for me. I never once found that entertaining

his acquaintance required any kind of effort. Here is where the years started flying by me. My

childlike perspective of time on the scale of my young age had expanded, and now the years

were small compared to my eventful life. We had our six months of school friendship, and the

year came to a close. Our elementary school would soon be a blast in my past as I moved on to

junior high

*RING RING*

Hello?

Oh hi Carlos mom

Id love to come over to your house over the summer

Could I talk to carlos for a moment?

Hey, do you have skype? Whats your username? Ill add you

Looks like the Carlos saga isnt quite over.[SLIDE 6] Im not sure if this is an over exaggeration

or not, but we probably talked every single day. Over the internet me and Carlos continued our

YouTube endeavours, attempting to make a successful channel. We also played games and just

talked sometimes. To put it into some perspective one year is 8760 hours and Ive spent 1034

hours playing ONE game with him. Thats only a small fraction of the hours Ive spent

conspiring with Carlos.

Two years forward, I was caught in the dread of high school anxiety. Another new school. Id

been tossed into a school without my input and I thought I was in for a wild ride. The first day of

school, I talked openly with in class but at lunch, I sit alone. Strange, someone comes up to me

and asks if I need somewhere to sit. To save the hundreds of details, the troubles of high school

dont delve deeper than the Bio homework. I think Ive figured it out, I never changed, the

people around me never did either; Ive just stopped trying to make friends. A lesson that Ive

taken 14 years to learn has finally shown its fruits. Who taught me this truth? Only everyone Ive

ever met.