undoing a constellation

by weirdfish

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thexrank This album feels like the moments before you wake up, its such a mindblowing journey and I hope it gets more recognition! Favorite track: Broken Bird.
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1.
2.
Here, I am nothing but the quiet air. Never thought this would feel so strange, Never thought the world would be so big in my window. I’m falling, but I’m never hitting the ground; I’m floating, weightlessly, just trying to be alive and To be lost in, pieces of my mind; To be drowning in an ocean of starlight. And somewhere, I will find you, so we can stand here, just for the sake of standing still.
3.
The raindrops would wash away these wounds and fill up the street. The people still buzzing like radios wishing they could just fade away, just fade away. Cars will crash into neon lights bending into the night, whispering for you to hide in the chasms of moonlight. So sink into, sink into the noise. I will learn, how to fly, maybe, maybe in another life. … Fall into your arms
4.
All of my life, Still searching for something missing.
5.
6.
Broken Bird 06:56
The warning signs will take me home, in the red lights, in the red lights. If only, If only I could breathe, If only I could breathe, I’ll just run, I’ll just run So wait for me to come home, wherever that would be, I’ll come flying at the speed of light. If only, If only I could breathe, If only I could breathe.
7.
I know that you’re out there somewhere. And I know that you’ll find a way back to the morning. I couldn’t quite find the words to bring myself to speak, so just let me close my eyes. … And now the dream goes on. Can we, just pretend? That we’ll untie these strings and I’ll hold you… So just let me close my eyes.
8.
Pipe Dreams 04:35
So waste it all away, Crash into the waves. I am so sick of the ceiling so tired I could just wisp away. But I’m still hopelessly wishing, still hopelessly wishing, to see you in my dreams, so that one day I would hopefully, forget how to wake from my sleep. Is this how it has to be? And it’s just me, and all the lies I tell myself; it’s just me, I could go wherever I want, but I must first disappear. Tired of waking up and this place just won’t stop spinning around, around around. So fuck it all, but it’s not even satisfying to yell it out loud; It’s so cold out, I know it will be warm but There’s always another winter. I guess I’ll sleep now, it’s easier to pretend that I could be wherever I want, wherever I want wherever I want.
9.
10.
If I could build a ship and sail to you, I would fly to the moon and back again, but I can’t get my feet off of the ground. Wasting away… What if everything was distant as moonlight? Will I crash into those pieces of your eyes? Every corner of every room, filled with traces of you. … Why does it always have to be so hard? … All the oceans in the world would not fill up the spaces, the spaces between us.
11.
Stars 03:46
There will always be these stars, saying the rest is only fiction. Even distance is just a way for them to say: Goodnight, Goodnight. So follow them to another dimension, Oh, how strange the way the spaces unfold. So drift away, we’ll just drift away drift away, just drift away. And now it’s just me and the stars, just me and the stars.
12.
13.
14.
Never knew how to forget, never living another day, never growing older. Never knew how to tell you, never finding a way, through all of this mess. I’ll never understand these songs, and I’ll never figure how to go back where I belong. But I miss you, I miss you. It’s been so long but I still miss you, I still miss you.
15.
Help me find the parts of my brain that I left humming So I can finally sleep at night. What would it take to realize, my friend, that I’m living someone else’s life? Is this just a way to stay alive? So follow the stars as if they were lighthouses, take me back to you. … Go back to the place where we began. We can keep searching and searching but it’s really no place at all. We can keep laughing and laughing at how ridiculous it is to be just anything. Go back to the place where we began. I’m sorry I’m here but I know that I’m nowhere at all. And I can keep sleeping and sleeping but I won’t really be dreaming of you, or anything else. But I know you’re still listening.
16.
Let us turn into memories, and fade into the streetlights; Let us dissolve, and become glimmers on the asphalt; Let us stay here, just for a moment; This is the end, but it’s not the ending of it all. Does it really matter, how I say goodbye? Distance Is more than just speed and time. So will I see you again when I fall to sleep? Maybe when I see you again we’d both know better than to cry. Leaving, doesn’t have to be so melodramatic. Would this get easier? Or would it be too much? Would it be too much to grow out of this? Leaving, doesn’t have to be so melodramatic. So I said: “Goodnight, Goodnight. There is no need to be terrified.” But I’m scared to turn around, to see would you still be standing there?

about

“undoing a constellation” was written, recorded, produced, mixed and mastered entirely by me in various iterations of a bedroom over the course of 2 years.

I wanted this album to be a lot of things: a tribute to the space age, a contemplation of romantic love, a meditation on distance and disconnection, and ultimately a world to escape to when you just want to get away from life for a little bit. I am not sure if it ended up being any of these things. Perhaps this album would forever drift in cliche and mediocrity. But it is finished, and I like it, and you may listen to it if you wish. I hope you enjoy.

credits

released May 7, 2024

all songs by weirdfish

album art by Lily Ryan

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weirdfish Boston, Massachusetts

experimental indie/post rock artist
based in my bedroom

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