Snapshots #421: Songs About Frauds, Hoaxes, Cons & Liars

Don't believe a word any of them say...

15. What happens when you dunk. 

You get a...

Limp Bizkit - Counterfeit

14. Princess found in dish of bacteria.

Princess Grace in a petri dish...

Grace Petrie - Nobody Knows That I'm A Fraud

13. Ten delays, but not in a row. 

"Ten delays" was an anagram.

Steely Dan - The Royal Scam

12. Royal drummer caught speeding.

The drummer in Queen is Roger Taylor.

Taylor Swift - Hoax

11. Back then: monotonous noises. Nowadays: spies in the sky.

The Drones - Lookalikes

10. What’s the price of a greeting?

What's the cost...'ello?

Elvis Costello – The Imposter

9. A mixtape of memories.

The Soundtrack Of Our Lives - 21st Century Rip Off

8. Hit snooze!

The Alarm - The Deceiver

7. I deny the accusation that I was ever part of this group.

Rol-in-Band? Never!

Rollins Band - Liar

6. A Great King, and Ryan.

Alexander The Great meets Ryan O'Neal.

Alexander O’Neal – Fake

5. Found in a chocolate ganache, and salsa ravioli.  

Chocolate ganache, and salsa ravioli.  

Tegan & Sara – The Con

4. Found in Essex, and in an arsenal.

Sex Pistols -  The Great Rock 'n' Roll Swindle

3. Used to transport Bones to the Enterprise.

Get the Van for Dr. McCoy.

Van McCoy & The Soul City Symphony - The Hustle

2. Achy Breaky Dino.

Achy Breaky Heart was Billy Ray Cyrus. Dean Martin was Dino.

Billie Ray Martin – Imitation Of Life 

1. Mr. Ferry, I deduce. But I’m probably mixed up.

"Mr. Ferry, I deduce" was an angram.

Freddie Mercury - The Great Pretender

Trust me when I say that Snapshots will be back next Saturday.

Product Placement Friday #3: Heinz Baked Beans

A million housewives every day

Pick up a can of beans and say:

“What an amazing example of synchronisation”

Only three weeks into this feature, and I'm still surprised that's the first time Nigel Blackwell has put in an appearance...

Half Man Half Biscuit - Venus In Flares

I do like a nice tin of beans, but they give me terrible heartburn (not to mention the other). But I do wonder why the other baked bean companies are still bothering. I mean, Pete & Roger settled their superiority over 50 years ago...

The Who - Heinz Baked Beans

Sell-outs! And here's a modern day version of the same trick...

Prod. Jay Archives - Beans

You wouldn't expect that kind of thing from Paul Weller...

Love me, love my jeans

I must buy shares in Heinz baked beans

Too busy buying up, selling out, selling off.

The Style Council - Confessions Of A Pop-Group

Less a fan was singer Heinz Burt (real name), originally a member of The Telstars, who once went on tour with Gene Vincent and Jerry Lee Lewis. Old school rock n roll fans didn't take to this young pretender though, and ended up chucking beans all over him while he sang his biggest hit...

Heinz - Just Like Eddie

Of a slightly more contemporary vintage, here's the wonderfully named Anorak Patch...

I’m always seeing adverts

Where boys just talk in lines

And sayin’ how much they like Heinz beans

And eat them all the time

Well, that’s not very clever

I’m not all that impressed

Cos’ everybody likes Heinz beans

Cos’ Heinz beans are the best

Anorak Patch - Beans

Rappers like Heinz beans too! Here's your proof..

N.SΔss - An Ode To Heinz Baked Beans

My favourite discovery this week comes from Aussie rock band The Drones. Let's just say that I like the cut of their gib.

People are a waste of food

Don't bother learning Chinese

Thou shalt find oneself perturbed

By less verbose calamities

Just get some Heinz baked beans

A 12 gauge, bandolier and tinned dog food

We'll eat your dog, bury our dead

Or eat them instead

That's entirely up to you