Pity the lovelorn Boa Constrictor!

Essex (UK) police have warned that a 6' Boa Constrictor, possibly driven by seasonal reproductive urges, has escaped through a bathroom window. He is called Diago (perhaps the owner intended to name him Diego after Diego Maradona, the well-known Argentinian footballer.) Does that mean that anyone spotting him should call his name and expect him to slither forward? Obviously, snakes being 'aurally challenged', (read my previous post) said call should be accompanied by repeated stamping on the ground.

The report continues, 'Although the reptile's bite is not poisonous, constrictors do bite if attacked' . . . (but they're constrictors . . . biting is not their primary, instinctive mode of response to perceived danger!)
Apparently, it is a juvenile, maybe even an adolescent, and we all know how unpredictable they can be – and that's just human teenagers – but it could be a danger to small animals. Keep your mice and guinea pigs indoors, just to be safe!
'It may have left the town' said local sources – cue lots of Essex girl jokes!