This is literally me just reading the prompt about Gaius giving ‘the talk’ to Cid and getting tangential brainworms.

So.

What if Gaius and Midas were fucking and it’s an open secret. Gaius as a ‘family friend’ who just so happens to be at Cid’s house all the time at odd hours.

[…]

The Warrior of Light (F!Raen or Hyur, probably) has always had an affinity for the Namazu of their homeland, even if it’s tempered by a sort of fond exasperation at their antics. The Namazu, for their part, greatly appreciate the Warrior’s said in other matters, but require just one more thing of her before she leaves for Eorzea once more…

OP wants the WOL to get (mostly consensually but incredibly unsatisfyingly and embarrassingly) gangbanged by dumbass fish people, anons. I don’t need it to be sexy, I need it to be fucking ridiculous. I need this for reasons.

Aymeric has feelings for Estinien, but Estinien doesn’t return those feelings. I don’t imagine it’s a matter of incompatible sexuality, more just… Estinien doesn’t feel that way about him. Aymeric has a lot of repressed fantasy Catholic feelings for the Azure Dragoon, but all Estinien feels is vaguely uncomfortable and guilty, because he cares about Aymeric in his own way, enough to not want to hurt him, and because part of him feels like he should be able to return those feelings. Estinien, not being the best at relationships, but wanting to make an effort for Aymeric’s sake, does something very ill-advised.

[…]

Male WOL is gay. Lyse is a lesbian. They’re both grieving Papalymo, at least a little drunk, and decide to shag. It is the absolute worst sex either of them has had in their lives.

Feel free to write the terrible sex, the aftermath, or both! I would prefer the story ends with them still friends and (eventually) able to laugh about it, but so long as the bad idea is mutual (no noncon/dubcon), go where your muse takes you!