Poor Albert & Little Annie

Original title belies what is really a bad movie. Hall plays a strange psycho who hates all women who are not virgins. Then he meets a innocent 11 year old. They take a extended trip to a amusement park. We see a long series of montages of them playing on the rides. Complete with a syrupy song titled "Poor Albert". (And you thought this was supposed to be a horror movie). The climax takes place in a abandoned warehouse full of mannequins, which the director does not take advantage of. A truly pathetic excuse for filmmaking. No scares, no suspense, no creativity; just Zooey Hall trying desperately to act. The worst film I've seen and I have seen a lot.

Zooey Hall, I've not seen him in any other role but, boy, was he perfect for the part of Albert. He certainly is a creepy-lookin' fellow. No wonder he's credited as playing "Joanie's Weird Boyfriend" on a Happy Days episode.

I Dismember Mama is an irksome film with laughable music throughout, even for the period. The scenes where Albert is chasing Annie has accompanying music that sounds like something from the old Adam West "Batman" TV-series. It ruins the climatic scenes. Summed up, there's not much to see, well . . . some '70s nudity.

Albert (Zooey Hall) has some serious issues. He believes that all women are "whores". He also believes that his mother (Joanne Moore Jordan) is the cause of all his problems. Albert also suffers from severe WBHS (Warren Beatty Hair Syndrome).

Dr. Burton (Frank Whiteman) is convinced that Albert is dangerously disturbed and should be institutionalized. Shockingly, mum won't hear of it.

Albert begins a killing spree, sporting an awesome Fedora / turtleneck ensemble. All the while, the theme song "Poor Albert" plays on like some terribly-written accomplice.

I DISMEMBER MAMA is a thoroughly preposterous experiment in early 1970's misogyny. It wavers between being a tale of sadistic terror and a hilarious parody of itself. The aforementioned, misplaced theme song is a marvel!

Albert himself is at once a repellent, murdering pig, and a complete bonehead. One simply must witness his jumping matador dance routine!

BEST SCENES: #1- Albert's theological discussion on the lake, intercut with scenes of his last homicide! #2- Abert's history lesson on the way to a hotel bridal suite! Pure cinematic genius!

Special accolades must go to Greg Mullavey's unforgettable role as the yelling cop. Really, who yells like that?

No human soul could possibly be prepared for the crying, screaming, tantrum-induced anti-doom of the finale!

No actual mannequins were harmed...

Don't let the clever I DISMEMBER MAMA title lead you to believe that this is going to be a bull's-eye grindhouse classic. Simply stated, this is a strictly par B thriller full of hand-me-down ideas, possibly a notch higher on the sicko-meter for presenting a psychotic antagonist unwholesomely obsessed with a little girl. Beyond that, a faceless dime-a-dozen vehicle with the usual kook harboring the usual resentment of females, and the usual unlucky lasses who become his victims.

It's a visually unappealing affair, with better performances from its principal cast than the base material really deserves, and a few scenes are admittedly set up fairly well. In the bigger picture, however, this is just an unimaginatively assembled exposition of something we've all seen a thousand times before, and done a thousand times better.

4/10...passable, but you'll certainly live to tell about how you didn't bother to see it.

In this film, Albert is a rich psycho, who goes around looking for sex, then killing the woman if they are not virgins.When he sees little 11 year old Annie, he falls in love.But,since he doesn't want to ruin her purity, he finds another woman, and Annie catches them,starting the finale.

This is a rare film to find=majority of video stores don't have it...But, its really crazy and unrelated, worth a look!