Jaguar Lives!

I actually couldn't care less about lame Kung-Fu movies; however I am strangely fascinated by insignificant B-movies that assemble impressive ensemble casts even though everything else about it absolutely sucks. "Jaguar Lives!" is a terrific example of this, if there ever was one. This is without a doubt one of the dumbest, most redundant, most intolerable and dullest flicks ever made, but would you look at that cast! The titular hero is a total nobody – and remained a total nobody even though this dud was supposed to launch his acting career – but would you just take a look at the names surrounding him! It's like an unofficial James Bond reunion where only the coolest people received an invitation: Christopher Lee, Donald Pleasance, the stunningly beautiful Barbara Bach, Joseph Wiseman and – just for fun's sake – Woody Strode and John Huston. The issue, however, is that all these great people only appear for a mere couple of minutes and I bet all my money that none of them had a clue what this movie was about. The whole thing is just a dire excuse to showcase Joe Lewis' admittedly smooth Kung-Fu moves (watch him kick two naughty villains off their bikes at once in impressive slow-motion) and to travel around the most dreamy exotic locations in the world to tell an inexistent story about an international drug network. Moreover, the identity of the criminal mastermind is so goddamn obvious straight from the beginning that the attempts to hide his face or cover up the sound of his voice are downright hilarious. Donald Pleasance clearly had a fun day depicting a cartoonesque South American dictator, but the rest of them are just performing on automatic pilot and appear to be clinically dead. The explosions and car crashes look incredibly amateurish and Ernest Pintoff's direction is as uninspired as can be. Somehow this turkey received a beautiful and luxurious DVD-release even though it hardly deserves such a treatment. There are far better contemporary cult flicks out there that sadly remain stuck in obscurity. But hey, if you want to have a good laugh or wish to pointlessly kill off a couple of your brain cells, you can't go wrong with "Jaguar Lives!"

Jaguar Lives! Is a strangely shot yet alluring yarn about globetrotting martial arts expert Joe Lewis who works on a ranch with sensei Woody Strode, somewhere in Spain. The entire movie was filmed in Spain in September 1978. When Lewis' services are needed, a goddess (Barbara Bach) arrives from the sky in a helicopter to tell Lewis where to go and what to do. It jumps around a bit. I didn't really try to understand what was going on too much, and found it to be an interesting watch, not so much for the plot. It's sort of James Bond meets Mission Impossible meets Steven Seagal meets Beverly Hills Ninja. Being familiar with Lee, Pleasance, Strode, and Bach, I figured a movie with that cast couldn't be too bad. And it wasn't. Lee is his typical staid and villainous self. Donald Pleasance is especially amusing in his role as a dictator, but it is only slightly more than a cameo appearance. The reason I watched was because of Bach, with Jaguar Lives! coming up on a search result for her. She was good as always but her parts too few and far between. Lewis, who was a complete unknown to me, pretty much hogs the screen. I would've liked to see more of Bach, obviously, but Lewis was actually better than i expected him to be, and this is a martial arts movie, so for what it is, i think it succeeds to an extent. Watch it twice if you don't believe me.

During a mission a secret agent called Jaguar loses his partner in a explosion. So after the disaster he goes back to his sensei to continue his training. But after a while he is called back on a mission involving that of a international drug dealer that might have had a hand in his friend / partner's death. This leads Jaguar on a whirlwind trip across the glob, where he encounters many foes before he confronts his main man.

I wasn't expecting too much, but I was pleasantly surprised in what I got from this b-grade romp. It's your typical textbook James Bond adventure with the agent travelling around the world to many exotic locations, gathering information on a villain he's tracking down. But our secret agent here Jonathan Cross - Code name Jaguar; has a speciality in martial arts, which he demonstrates on those who get in his way. While, the big scale production and story shares some familiarity to a Bond film, also the stars play a high influence to that factor. You got Christopher Lee, Donald Pleasence, Joseph Wiseman and Barbara Bach making up the cast with some nifty performances. Ironically, they themselves have starred in a Bond film. It's just too bad that they have very little to do here with their meagre roles. Other notables making up the well-known cast include Woody Strode, Capucine, John Huston, Anthony De Longis and an enticing Sally Faulkner in some sexy lingerie. Man, just looking at the names - it should have been a blinder. Kickboxing expert Joe Lewis as Jaguar delivers the goods in the moves, but his overall acting performance is rather wooden. In the end the cast like this is simply wasted.

"Jaguar Lives" at times is an exciting escapism story that's filled with some cartoon like characters and a sizzling verve of precise and intense action scenes. The rollicking martial art scenes seem to feed off the story rather then being just senseless mayhem. Well, that might be a plus, but sometimes there was just too much talk where there could have been some vigorous activity. But when the action did kick in, the tempo was staged with supreme skill and impressive set pieces - just like the fitting climax battle. The jam-packed story which the film follows real closely is an convoluted mess with many illogical steps, but it's basically working itself up to the final confrontation. And when it came to providing us the main villain's identity, it shouldn't be much of a surprise to anyone. I found it to get incredibly better and more intriguing the further along it went. The script is terribly blunt and quite forced, although there's an ample amount of wit found throughout (even though it doesn't always come off). Since the agent travels high and low that means there's quite a change of scenery with some astonishing locations and the sublime photography is professionally set-up with many creative and brisk manoeuvring shots. The fruitful score is an energy charged belter that gives out that groovy 70s twang in neat short pockets.

At best a cheesy time-waster that's filled with a mish-mash of ideas and comic book heroics within it's martial arts background.

This flick has one of the most incredible casts ever assembled for a B-movie! You've got Christopher Lee, Donald Pleasence (fresh from "Halloween"), Barbara Bach (former Bond Girl), Woody Strode (those who've seen "Spartacus" aren't likely to have forgotten him), Capucine (Inspector Clouseau's wife in "Pink Panther"), even the legendary director John Huston (not his first useless supporting role; remember "Tentacles"?). Unfortunately, none of those performers get a chance to stand out and do anything memorable, the story is confusing (although the main villain's "hidden" identity is easy to guess) and karate expert Lewis, who stars, knows all the right moves but has little acting charisma. (*1/2)

A run-of-the-mill action/thriller/kung-fu movie with good main and support cast and ordinary theme about brave secret agent busts international crime ring plot . The world's new Karate hero , Jonathan Cross (Joe Lewis) who is out to stop enemies. Helped by Sensei (Woody Strode) , Cross battles drug dealers , nasty bands , and help save the world from an evil con (Sir Christopher Lee) and other defector agents . These treacherous times demand a new style of hero. Now is the time for Jaguar . Now is the time for a great new screen hero. Now is the time for Jaguar.

A no-interest , tacky and multi-location action movie that takes its cues from early 007 movies , cheapo chop-socky movies and Chuck Norris films . In fact Joe Lewis was a world class Karate champion, and trained with Chuck Norris and even fought several matches against Bruce Lee in the 1960s . It turns out to be the listless, tedious hokum of the secret agent battling an international conspiracy , that nowadays it looks hopelessly anachronistic in even the baldest commercial terms . Here stands out the appearances from notorious international actors at the time , such as : Christopher Lee at one of his ordinary 70s roles as a villain , Donald Pleasence as an overacting dictator , the gorgeous Bond-girl Barbara Bach , the elegant and cold Capucine , Joseph Wiseman as an old blind man , the hunk Woody Strode and actor/director John Huston . Being a US/Spain co-production with brief intervention of Spanish actors , such as : Luis Prendes as a prison chief , Simón Andreu , George Rigaud , Emilio Rodríguez , Víctor Israel , Taida Urruzola, Fedra Lorente , Maribel Hidalgo, among others .

Highlights the gorgeous and colorful cinematogrophy by John Cabrera shot in several locations in USA , Tokio , Macao , Hong Kong and shot mostly in Spain : Desert Tabernas , Almeria , La Alcazaba, Almería, Andalucia , Dehesa de Navalvillar, Colmenar Viejo, Madrid, El Escorial, Madrid, Valle de los Caídos, Madrid and Castle of Belmonte, Cuenca, Castilla-La Mancha where long time ago was filmed Anthony Mann's El Cid . The motion picture was lousily directed by Ernest Pintoff . Ernest was an ex-cartoonist and once once-touted filmmaker and winning the Oscar for best animated short for The Critic (1963), a satire on modern art written and narrated by Mel Brooks. Pintoff previously earned an Oscar nomination for his animated short The Violinist (1959), narrated by Carl Reiner. For television Pintoff directed episodes of numerous series, including Hawai 5-0 (1968), The Six Million Dollar Man (1974) and Falcon Crest (1981). As part of NBC's "Experiments in Television" in the late 1960s, he directed the documentaries "This Is Marshall McLuhan" and "This Is Sholem Aleichem." Among Pintoff's feature credits as a director are the low-budget Who killed Mary Magdalene (1971), starring Red Buttons, and Dynamite Chicken (1971) . Jaguar Lives! (1979) rating : 4/10 , inferior and embarrassing action movie .