Yesterday's Hero

One of those films so utterly banal and predictable as to be almost enjoyable on that account alone, the soccer world of Yesterday's Hero seems now nearly as distant as that of the superior Arsenal Stadium Mystery of forty years earlier. A time when virtually all weekend games kicked off at 15.00 on a Saturday, muddy pitches on some grounds from early winter on, teams rather than 'squads' and when you could pronounce all the players' names. A wealthy owner signing a player over the head of the manager would also look absurd back then, but now seems commonplace, so in that regard the film is prescient.

Not a big fan of Ian McShane but he's excellent here, giving the only really convincing performance and blends in well with the footage from the Forest/Southampton League cup final. (To me he has a passing resemblance to the superb England goalkeeper of the era, Peter Shilton.) Neither Adam Faith nor Paul Nicholas were great actors to say the least, the latter also turning up in another Jackie Collins' epic The World Is Full Of Married Men, released shortly prior to this. So for fans of Ms Collins and Mr Nicholas, 1979 was their year.

A prime piece of late 1970s' fluff starring Ian McShane as a (sort of) George Best character and Paul Nicholas as a wealthy pop star who has bought into a football club (I'm guessing this part of the film was inspired by Elton John's involvement with Watford FC). Written by renown football expert Jackie Collins, and also starring Suzanne Somers as Cloudy, the type of female character name you could only get in a film written by Jackie Collins ...with Alan Lake in all his medallion man glory, who appears to have done more lines offscreen than he gets onscreen.

Whereas most movies with Jackie Collins' name attached to them were ubiquitous during the VHS era (especially 'The Stud' and 'The Bi*ch') this one mysteriously never made it to video in the UK, but has been dusted off a few times recently by Talking Pictures TV.

A famous singer (Suzanne Somers), and an aging pro soccer player (Ian McShane), who hooked-up years before, find themselves crossing paths again, in England, in this drama, that has a hard time getting started, but ends up being good enough, for an "E For Effort". Somers gets top billing in Yesterday's Hero (1979). Somers' Cloudy Martin, is one-half of a pop-music duo, known as Martin and Simon (Paul Nicholas). In the real world, I guess, they are like the Captain and Tennille, type-of, late-1970s pop music. The soundtrack is very disco driven. The way their performances are presented in the film, look very much like performances from television hits like, the Sonny & Cher Comedy Hour (1971-1974) and Donny and Marie (1976-1979). The music in Yesterday's Hero (1979), is pretty bad. Suzanne isn't a convincing singer, however it definitely sounds like her. It's not dubbed.

Yesterday's Hero (1979), is a British production, that was distributed by Columbia Pictures. The low budget used for the film, which is obviously visible in this production, unintentionally, but positively, gives the film some realism and a grittiness, that produces a fairly cool, 1970s-style to it. Unfortunately, I could only find a VHS, 4:3 version of the film, which also looked squeezed. I am hoping, the day I stumble across Yesterday's Hero (1979) again, next time, hopefully, I can watch a new HD version of it. It may improve the grade, that I gave the film. The muddy VHS quality was a rough watch. This film feels like a hallmark, lifetime type of movie, but it was released before cable networks were a thing. Even though it has a PG rating, there is an evident TV-movie effect going on. The film was directed by Neil Leifer.

Yesterday's Hero (1979), is a mix of staged singing sequences, interwoven between a soccer practice or game. Ian McShane plays Rod Turner, who among, the other things I mentioned, is also a drunk. It's good that he runs into Cloudy and Simon, because they decide to help Rod, make a comeback in pro soccer. The TV-movie aura felt in the film, is reenforced by acting lines, that felt like they were written for TV and not written, for a theatrical film. This was an era when they still said, "let's make love", on television, instead of "let's have sex". Yesterday's Hero (1979), is kind of lame, but it still deserves an E for Effort. The plot begins to feel like, its coming out of control and it has an abrupt ending. I'm talking quick. There are some funny moments, like seeing Ian McShane load 15 kids into a 1970s, European station wagon, which looks like a tank, because he teaches soccer to kids, but transportation was somewhat cheap. In the final credits it says, Suzanne Somers' wardrobe - from her closet.

PMTM Grade: E+ (5.2) = 5 IMDB.

The opening credits of this movie feature some of the most evocative scenes of what is was like to be part of grass roots football in the 1970's. Grimy rooftops give way to a chugging freight train whose journey passes by a football ground where a game is taking place in an absolute quagmire. The ball should be white but is plastered in mud as are all the players. This is the way it used to be. Those from the locality will recognise the ground of Maidenhead United. Unfortunately that is the high point of the movie as thereafter it becomes a cheesy & predictable story of of a drunken ex-pro footballer who gets the opportunity to make good one last time. Actually, Ian McShane is very good in the role although his gait in the football action sequences is not that of a gifted footballer. Sam Kydd plays his father. Were there any British movies of that era Sam Kydd wasn't in?

This is one of those upbeat 70s movies about an alcoholic football player who's career is on the skids, but for some unfathomable reason he is given a second bite of the cherry.

This has to be one of the least known UK football movies and based on my viewing it's easy to see why. Simply put there is more disco than football. And I mean there's a lot of it. And it's not even good disco, it's very bad disco. It's the worst kind of disco imaginable. The reason there is so much bad music is that the owner of the team just happens to be a singer. So we have to endure disco when he sings.....but also during any of the football scenes. So it's a double disco endurance test.

The cast are basically a who's who of every bad male 1970s UK TV actor around. They look so out of place in a movie. Even McShane seems disinterested.

Fans of football movies look away, it may serve as a snapshot of the worst UK fashion and music scenes of the 70s, but that's basically it.

Maybe because it was written by a famous female author much of the so called action is centred around the protagonists love life, but even that aspect is pretty flat.

Maybe watch it to say you have seen it but you have been warned, it's a bit like being stuck at a wedding dance and the DJ only has obscure disco tracks he enjoys but nobody else does, and every now and then you have to listen to an old drunk tell you about how they could have been a great footballer. Head for the exit!