Men in White

I saw this film back in 99 when it was first on in the UK, and here I am writing about it in 2004. Since then I consider myself a little bit older, a little bit wiser but one thing still remains the same- This film is one of the worst ever to grace (or is that disgrace?) celluloid. I understand a few of the gags more, most notably since I watched the likes of 2001 and that but they are still absolutely abysmal. Gags should appeal to everyone of the target audience (bit of advice for you Mr writer) but jokes about smoking aren't really going to make the kids laugh are they? So what else is terrible in this film? Well I only have a 1000 word limit on the IMDb so I will keep it brief so let us start with the dreadful plotting.

One previous writer is correct, a dead cat could write something better. Then we have the characters, two idiotic morons which worked well in Dumb and Dumber because they had the dialogue but in this film I won't even go there, OK then I will as you insist..."We've been saving the Earth from alien invasion", "I hope you don't expect any extra bonus for this..." you get the picture in this dire picture. Another previous writer was correct also, Tom Wilson is a decent actor as he showed us in Back to the Future, but since then work has kind of dried up. He shouldn't be getting this guff at all, but the question we need to ask ourselves is WHY Mr Wilson decided to do this film in the first place? If you haven't seen this diabolical mess of a film, then I have a surprise for you...watch it! Seriously, watch this film, I kid you not. And why? Well if you are a budding screenwriter it is truly a lesson of how NOT to make a film.

I think of the title of "National Lampoons" and i think of a hilarious insight into popular culture and the "cult" things of our times. I had expected something close to "Spaceballs" but was reminded instead of why i grew up! Do not view this movie unless you are grafting your child onto the realm of "Star Wars"....

Please step lightly!

Although properly warned I actually sat down to watch this movie. In part because I usually give every movie an even break, and because I thought that a single movie couldn't be that bad. I stand corrected. Not even George Kennedy, Barry Bostwick or Ben Stein could save this turkey from sinking like a ton of bricks. Only once during this humor forsaken travesty of a spoof did I laugh. Namely during the Simon says scene. The other jokes are either poorly carried out or simply plain unfunny. And some of them you actually see coming a mile away. This movie just hasn't got what it takes to be a good parody like Airplane! (I+II), Naked Gun (I+II+III), or Scary Movie. They all had A. funny gags, B. good dialog and most important of all C. unforgettable quotes. Men In White has got D. none of the above. To call this movie bad would be a gross understatement. AVOID THIS MOVIE ANYWAY YOU CAN! CONSIDER YOURSELVES WARNED!

This film was a complete waste of time, totally unfunny and just about everything in the movie has been seen before ( ok I know that's the point up to a degree but Spaceballs managed to show us a load of stuff we'd seen before in an original and entertaining manner ). Obviously the only reason anyone decided to slap National Lampoons onto the title is because no-one would otherwise touch this pile of cack with a barge pole. I know Tom Wilson is deserving of better than this sorry effort and although he does well with the really naff dialogue he gets it's still not enough to save this turkey......AVOID!!! On the plus side though my kids (3, 5 & 6) thought it was quite amusing.

I wished I'd taped MEN IN WHITE so I could watch it again

" What ? You mean you really enjoyed it Theo ? "

No I mean I could watch it again to see if it was as retarded , stupid and as embarrassingly unfunny as I can remember it

A lot of people have claimed it was made for children . May I suggest it was also made by children ? because the whole structure of the script lacks any type of discipline on the part of the producers and writers and much of set pieces seem to have been included because it seemed like a good idea at the time

The cast don't help but I genuinely started to feel sorry for them . Honestly you can believe that during filming the cast had to lie to their families that they were filming a hard core porn film such was their embarrassment at having to appear in something as dismal as this . To give you an idea of how bad the acting is every time BAYWATCH babe Donna D'Ericco disappeared from the narrative I waited patiently for her to reappear then seconds later I forgot she was in the movie . Got that ? A star from BAYWATCH appears and seconds later you forget they're in the movie . This tells you all you need to know about the standard of MEN IN WHITE

Fair enough it's trying to be a live action cartoon similar to THE GOODIES ( Although THE DISMALS would be a better adjective for this movie ) , though perhaps the movie deserves some credit for never descending to toilet humour , but considering this is a kids movie ( This didn't stop ITV broadcasting it at 11 pm ) then there should be no near the knuckle humour in it anyway