The Rosie O'Donnell Show

This is probably the most insipid thing that's ever been on TV. I don't know who they are supposed to be appealing to. They stick America's favorite Doyenne of Dumpiness out there to push gooey smarm on the unfortunate viewer for half an hour (except when Rosie goes after something she DOESN'T like, like Tom Selleck, and out comes the bile). I think someone has to be seriously masochistic to actually watch this. I personally can't even stand Rosie doing that wobbly-lookin' chicken dance in commercials on NBC anymore.

Seriously, I seriously think that this show's survival is either some trick of the devil or just because she's some sort of sacred cow to NBC's programmers. I really wonder who this show is supposed to appeal to. Someone staying at home during the afternoon, which eliminates most people with jobs. Poor people? I doubt they would get or be interested in Rosie's rosy and banal world. Independently wealthy people? Usually people that have already made their mark have better things to do than watch TV in the afternoon. Housewives? I guess this has to be it but I've really wondered how they can identify with her not-so-well-disguised... different lifestyle from them. You know what I mean. ;)

Even Rosie's "good person" act is getting tired and definitely wearing thin. A double-edged sword that, as her worldview is apparently rather viciously absolutist and probably quite a few degrees from the mainstream. She's all nice and warm and sugary and likes things that are nice and warm and sugary but anything apart from that, like guns, Fight Club, or whatever and she hits the roof. She's sort of like an evil Miss Manners, or better yet, a socialist counterpart to Dr. Laura (sans the protesters, of course).

I consider this show a one-woman equivalent of Regis and Kathy Lee, but even less scintillating or relevant. One can spend one's life more productively watching the Weather Channel or the Farm Report in the afternoon than this garbage. Even if you like this show, there's better things to do at 3 in the afternoon. Go out, do something big. Direct a movie, write a book, publish a website, start the Save the Children from Big Meanie Republicans Foundation, whatever, and maybe you could actually be a guest on the show.

As for Rosie, well, I'm just waiting 20 years or so for the E! True Hollywood Story about her. I'm really curious as to what that's going to say about her in hindsight.

Not that there are many other daytime talk shows worth watching, but the Rosie O'Donnell Show is definitely one to avoid. Arguably the highlight of Rosie's entertainment value (over that of any person off the street) is her ability to sing the theme song of nearly all of the TV series that have ever been broadcast.

The best that she can do in the way of entertainment is show off a skill that one can only gain through rigorous, almost religious TV viewing over an entire lifetime. Do we really need to spend our time watching someone's TV show, who is so entrenched in a television centered world view? It seems like a dangerous reinforcement of the repulsive contention that it is acceptable for people to sit in front of the TV as their sole pastime.

No one should subject themselves to any demonstration of such a deeply ingrained acceptance of the idea that a normal lifetime is one that's spent largely parked in front of a box that displays moving pictures on its screen, as the Rosie O'Donnell Show seems to openly advocate.

In engaging in such trivialization of a seriously mentally and physically debilitating lifestyle for Americans, the Show subtly glorifies a lifestyle that does not merit glorification.

From a TV producer's standpoint, it makes perfect sense for the host of a show to openly advocate such television worship.

Other shows, such as the Oprah Winfrey Show are more justifiable, as they advocate things such as reading books, exercising, and other concerns that are not so directly connected with television and the entertainment industry. True, there is marketing that's mixed in with the advocacy of almost anything, but almost anything is preferable to what amounts to advocacy of Couch Potatohood. Other daytime talk shows more actively advocate activities other than watching television.

The best thing I can say about her show is that she for the most part had good, main stream, "pop culture friendly" guests on. The best thing I can say about Rosie is that she is probably a cash friendly genius. I mean, she managed to create a talk show based upon her childhood dream of meeting celebrities. She is the ultimate "groupie" and made no bones about it. She's a smart gal and should retire, live privately and laugh all the way to the bank.

If I ever understand why this show is so popular, I think I will understand everything there is to know about people.

I would like to stress that if you are a fan of Rosie O'Donnell's show, that you stop reading this review right now, because you are going to hate it with a passion! I am about to tear into Ms. O'Donnell and her show after this sentence, so I suggest you leave now before I offend you.

Now, if you're still here, then you mustn't mind my upcoming Rosie bashing. If you do, than it's your own fault, cuz I warned you. Where do I begin in what I call the worst talk show in the history of television? Let's see, how about the host.

Rosie O'Donnell, as many of you know, was an actress in movies for several years, and in this format, I don't really mind her. In fact, I even saw "The Flintstones" more than once, (Though she would not have been my first choice to play Betty Rubble) In addition to films, she also did some acting on Broadway, like I care! Now, she hosts the worst talk show I have ever seen, and I've seen "The Howard Stern Radio Show" and "Open Mike with Mike Bullard!!"

Granted, the show is on in the day time, therefore it has to be cleaned up a bit. But this show is way too clean for my likes. The comedy is for babies, and the ranting is for yuppies and old people. In the era when most shows try to target an 18-30 demographic, Rosie said, "Nah! I want to appeal mostly to people with no teeth." Great! That leaves babies, old people, and the people of Branson, Missorui. (Sorry, that was one of Dennis Miller's).

Rosie also uses the show as her own personnal forum for expressing her opinions. While I usually aplaud this, it is not something I look for in a talk show. Also, kudos to Rosie for getting involved in so many chariatable organizations, but does she have to keep hitting us over the head with this fact? Fine Rosie, you're great, I'm a loser, are you happy?

Also, there's a limit to how many personal opinions one person can express, or so I thought. Recently, Rosie saw the film, "Fight Club", a film I had planned to go see. The day I was going to go see it, I happened to come across Rosie's show and for some insipid reason, I watched it. There was Rosie, saying how much she hated "Fight Club" and then, in an inforgivable action, announced the ending on the air, ruining the film for me and so many other people!! Why is this applauded? She should have known form the previews that she wouldn't have liked it, cuz it didn't have a namby pamby G rating.

In short, I hate this show! It is the worst Talk show in the history of television.

Overall rating: No stars (Kinda like most of her guests, eh?)

In an age of crudity, shock value, and lame sensationalism, this show was really a breath of fresh air. It was NICE!! Rosie was NICE!! The audience was NICE!! The guests, the set, the quasi-annoying band, the games, the prizes, all NICE!! It may seem ridiculous to sing the virtues of a show by giving such lukewarm praise as the word nice over and over, but that's what it was. It wasn't edge of your seat, controversial, nail-biting television. And who needs more of that really? There are many other daytime shows that go for the gold when it comes to disturbing their audiences and spellbinding them into disgusted fascination, but this show wasn't like that. And for that, I thank you Rosie O'Donnell.