Killer Barbys

Jesús Franco's late work Killer Barbys is a mixed bag to me - it got some real good fun gore and horror scenes and some schlocky, sexy fun too, but there are, sadly, some rather lengthy and boring parts too, that weaken the experience rather considerably. Anyway, Killer Barbys is still recommendable to the die-hard connoisseur of Jesús Franco's oeuvre, who just craves for new junk food, but if you are new to his work I would recommend rather other movies to enter the maestro's wonderland of trash, cheese and schlock: Count Dracula, Vampyros Lesbos, Bloody Moon, and Venus in Furs are good movies to begin your journey. Exact rate: 3.5.

The Italian Dub of A Spanish Low Budget Horror... Wasnt terrible tbh.

PLex had this movie, but it was the Italian language version known as "Vampire Killer Barbys", instead of the shorter proper version.

A Spanish ROck band goes on tour late at night and breaks down, and you can guess the rest.

But apart from being like a somwhat more realistic modern version of the Mystery Gang from Scooby Doo, this felt way more punk rock and macabre. AS IT SHOULD BE for grimeier horror!

THe premise is right there on the movie page, but the emphasis on gore, tons of props and items used, and the classic Italian habit of using nudity here and there, along with the bad acting, made for a ironically funny movie that had a slight bit of good horror elements to it. IT was certainly shot at night with minimal lighting most of the time, harkening back to the looks of the old 60s and 70s Hammer Horror films. Music was pretty enjoyable, and though I gave it a 4, its only because I wanted to hear the Spanish version more. Oh well. 4.5/10 :P.

The Legendary Spanish director Jess Franco is known for some fantastic cinema, alas this certainly isn't among them and will be a blotch on his record.

It follows a female fronted rock band as they break down on route to their next gig and get invited into a foreboding looking castle for the night.

Essentially our antagonist is a blatant ripoff of the Countess Elizabeth Báthory with a couple of human minions who help her acquire the blood of the young (Virgins not required in this instance)

Though advertised as a horror this is a very camp attempt and more like a comedy. One character in particular played by Santiago Segura (Blade 1998) is so over the top and so zany any hope of the film being taken seriously went out the window.

The movie has a decent lead and memorable soundtrack though they really should have considered writing more songs and not playing the same one on a loop.

The Good:

Great leading lady

The Bad:

Looks very dated

Not exactly a horror

Soundtrack gets repetitive

Dumbest ending in cinema history? Definite contender

Things I Learnt From This Movie:

Before throwing a naked woman out a window to her death it's only polite to put a nightie on her first

Perhaps the worst dubbing in history, this movie features many scenes with characters' lips still moving long after the dubbed track had already spoken. It was very frustrating. On top of that, the entire movie made little sense. It was completely disjointed. The filmmakers tried to weird it up by having a couple of psychotic midgets thrown into the mix, but the result was just pathetic. There are countless scenes where bandmembers (Killer Barbys are a real band) are having sex in a van, and the baddies are hovering around, opening doors, stealing things, placing objects, yet are never even so much as noticed by the lovemakers. There are equally moronic scenes of the baddies chasing after a naked woman in the woods. She looks like she is running in slowmotion and has to keep waiting for her pursuers to catch up. Then there is some subplot involving some ancient vampiress who must drink young blood to regain her youth, yet when she does, she becomes some 65-year old had been! She is supposed to be this beauty who seduces the lead singer, yet she is easily old enough to be his grandmother!

They tried to throw in a few corpses to add to the horror, yet they were so obviously rubber it was ridiculous. One of the henchmen carries one through the castle, and you can repeatedly see him bang it against walls only to have it snap back into shape.

There are A-movie, B-movies, and then there are Killer Barby movies. This one is so bad, it doesn't even deserve a letter from the alphabet. Call it a double-Z.

I'd been warned this was bad before I watched it, but nothing could prepare me for just HOW bad! If this was made by some nameless hack I would have watched it and immediately forgotten about it, but as it's directed by Jess Franco, the man responsible for cult favourites like 'Vampyros Lesbos', 'Succubus', 'Eugenie De Sade', 'A Virgin Among The Living Dead', 'Sadisterotica' and 'Faceless', I couldn't help but be a little depressed... 'Killer Barbys' is absolute garbage any way you look at it and a sad low point for Franco. It's very hard to think of one good thing to say about it. Okay, The Barbies lead singer Silvia Superstar is pretty hot and their song 'Love Killer' isn't bad and rocks in a similar way to The Muffs or The Donnas. That's about it for praise. Apart from that, this movie stinks. Franco has done wonders on minimal budgets before in his long career, so that's no excuse for how poor this is. There are some talented people in the cast too - spaghetti western regular Aldo Sambrell, who will be a familiar face to Sergio Leone fans, co-star of the wonderful 'The Day Of The Beast' Santiago Segura, and Mariangela Giordano ('The Sect'). But the script is awful, the special effects lame, and the dubbing on the DVD I watched atrocious. If you hold Jess Franco in high esteem like I do, it's best to avoid this rubbish. You'll just feel cheated and sad. Highly UNrecommended!