Take My Eyes

I've already seen this film twice and the subsequent viewing has not diminished much director Iciar Bollain's powerful treatment of domestic violence. In fact, I was actually reluctant to see it again because its potent portrayal of spousal abuse was too disturbing.

There are two things notable about this film that make it stand out from other films on the same subject. One is that it features almost no violence. In fact, there is only one full-blown case of abuse portrayed, and it is less about physical abuse than it is humiliation and emotional abuse.

Another is the nuanced portrayal of the abusive husband. For this, credit must go to actor Luis Tosar, who portrays Antonio. Although the film does its best to give a more balanced portrayal by showing that Antonio does go to therapy and makes some attempt to change his ways, it is Tosar's performance that brings out his human side.

It would have been easy for Tosar to have demonized Antonio, particularly since the actor already a scary appearance, what with his bushy eyebrows and deep-set eyes. But Tosar chooses to take the high road in his performance, focusing on Antonio's deep-seated insecurity and inferiority complex, which are the roots of his violence towards his wife.

His most notable scene is the last one in the film when his wife finally leaves him. As she and her friends go around the apartment packing up her things, the expression on his face is not one of anger but of incomprehension.

But equal credit should be given to Laia Marull, who portrays the wife, Pilar. Because of her performance, the filmmakers literally do not have to show much violence. The literally palpable fear she shows when Antonio is about to go into once of his rages makes that unnecessary.

The film also shows the sexual bond between Pilar and Antonio in order to explain why she continues to return to him despite his abusive behavior, through a frank sex scene that would be possible only in Europe, since American movie makers seem averse to that kind of frankness.

Te doy mis ojos is difficult to watch at times, because of the intensity of its emotional violence. But it is ultimately rewarding for the insights it gives on spousal abuse and the relationship between abusive husband and abused wife.

This movie takes a brutally honest approach at the tragic reality of spousal abuse. This topic has been addressed before, but this movie deals with the subject matter better than any other I can recall seeing.

An effective performance by Luis Tosar, as the abusive husband Antonio, develops the layers of emotions in this imposing and frightening character in an effort to understand why this violence is occurring. While certainly not presenting an advocate's position to defend his cruel and vicious behavior, the film also resists the temptation of exploiting the volatile outbreaks. The film shows degrading speech and physical battery to the wife, while not going overboard with bloody, gory attack just for their own sake. He attends support groups to discuss with a psychologist and other abusers the root causes of the action, and makes a sincere effort to change his ways. Gradually, the motivations for his irrational action, although becoming clearly understood, are still properly advanced as totally unacceptable.

Laia Marull, as the abused wife, is not stereotyped, either. She is shown as an intelligent and capable person, making an honest effort to confront the situation, while struggling with the conflict of somehow preserving the marriage. There are many artistic metaphors about the passion of their marriage reflecting the very problem they are dealing with. I also like the wife's museum tour presentations, where she is clearly talking not only of the paintings, but of her own aspirations. Both of the principals are splendid in their roles, especially in their interaction with one another.

Much could be written of the rich double-layered symbolism of several other scenes. Suffice it to say this is a beautifully done movie with an ending, that in all its simplicity, took me by surprise. It was the proper ending, too, I think, for reasons you will understand when you see the movie. Definitely worth viewing.

There are for sure many other films dealing with domestic violence, but I bet no one is better than this one.

This is something that is said to happen quite often in Spain and the movie was shot in order to sensitize people for this issue and to bring to talk about it. It is the story of an ill jealous man, full of complex of inferiority, terrorizing his wife and son.

I loved the love scene between both, where he makes her repeat that she gives all her body to him (Te doy mis ojos, te doy mi boca etc.). It shows perfectly the mental state of the husband who sees his wife as his property.

This was as well an excellent performance of Laia Marull and Luis Tosar.

Writer-director Iciar Bollaín's film, TAKE MY EYES (Spain 2003) is full of boldness and nuance, approaching 'full frontal' (almost a pun here) the delicate 'taboo' subject on spouse abuse in love and marriage. The exceptionally talented and selfless portrayal of the couple by Laia Marull as Pilar (the young wife/mother) and Luis Tosa as Antonio (the husband/abuser) made their scenes together - both the tender moments and violent events, convincing and complete. It's heartbreaking to see these two people who could be so in love (felt through the intimate lovemaking scenes, the calm moments they enjoy each other by the river) yet juxtaposed by the traumatic turn of events (seen through the 'explosive' frightful situations). Bollaín, with Marull and Tosa, did not shy away from the volatile subject and key scenes - it is no doubt devastating to behold yet the impact of the situation is truly felt and may also leave us shaking. Kudos to such giving and fearless performances and production decisions.

The Toledo, Spain, locales (especially by the river and bridge) seen in the film are as beautiful as I visited in Fall 2003. I remember the museum where Antonio waited outside for Pilar. He tried. He wanted to be a loving husband to her, but he couldn't help himself. It almost seem like uncontrollable 'alcoholic dependency', his jealous rage generated from fear of losing Pilar, whom he believes he loves in his own possessive ways. While Pilar also tries. She practically loses herself in trying to please Antonio and be 'blinded' by his waves of tenderness towards her. She's struggling to be a good wife and responsible mother to their little boy. She's also trying to find herself through the process.

I recall the wisdom from poet Kahlil Gibran's book "The Prophet" on Marriage: yes, you shall be together forever more, but there should be spaces in your togetherness. "Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping. For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts." And on Love, that it does not possesses, Gibran said: "And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course."

TAKE MY EYES gives us a rare chance to observe closely the various aspects/perspectives of a domestic violence situation, and offering viable option on the part of the woman. It may not be an easy film to watch due to frank emotional depiction, but it is superbly delivered by a fantastic cast besides Marull and Tosa. The script, co-written by Bollaín and Alicia Luna, contains supporting storyline (including a wedding and Scottish bagpipes and kilts - cultural diversity, girl talk, men talk, laughs and heartaches). Production is excellent in every respect: cinematography, editing, art direction, music score, sound and all. Highly recommend this film, with no hesitation.

The best I can say in favor of this film is that I came out of the cinema with terrible back pain because I had been so extremely tense while watching it. The actors are absolutely brilliant, communicating all that needs to be told, and the plot is never simplistic.

Most European social cinema seems influenced by Ken Loach's movies and this one is no exception. The way time passes slowly and characters try hard to improve their situation reminds a lot of Loach's "Sweet Sixteen", among others.

If there is any weakness to the movie is that I can't say if people who do not share the director's opinions on gender violence would appreciate this movie as much as I have.