Art Heist

"Art Heist" feels like "The Return of Bruno" CD by Bruce Willis.

I say that because the backup singers do most of the work. Just like William Baldwin, Abel Folk, and Ed Lauter do most of the work. Ellen Pompeo, like Willis, can't carry the heavy load of being the main character (or Singer). The script is a little weak and Pompeo makes it worse, with her dull line readings. Thank the Baldwin God, because William swoops down to save it. He plays Bruce Walker, a loose cannon cop who wants to stop Sandra (Pompeo) from getting too over her head. The action scenes are well filmed and William has dethroned Daniel as the sweatiest Baldwin, which is great! The last reviewer took this movie WAY too seriously. You're not supposed to think about this type of movie in that way.

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But it's certainly not very good either. Most of the acting is pretty flat, but I blame that more on the writers' incompetent dialog than on the actors' ability. Ellen Pompeo is pretty, but in such as way to be believable as an art history expert. The plot has enough twists to keep you guessing (and keep watching) and yet enough clues to help you figure it out. That said, it's still pretty trite and implausible. You do get to see some famous Barcelona landmarks, but the filmmakers haven't exploited their locale to the fullest. I thought the chase scenes were fairly well done, except that they all start looking the same after a while.

All-in-all, I'd have to say that the current IMDb rating of 4.1 is fair; several of the reviews here give it a "1", which should be reserved to the worst movies of all time, which this certainly isn't.

I picked up a used DVD copy at a local bookstore hoping to revisit Barcelona. In that sense, "Art Heist" was a bit of a disappointment. It's (barely) worth seeing if you have an interest in art history and in Barcelona and can see it for free, but for those really wanting a sense of this wonderful city, the best bet is "L'Auberge Espagnole".

OK - the helicopter shots are fantastic, and the director made good use of some of Barcelona's top sights. Otherwise...production value was blown in the first few minutes and the rest of the film felt like a movie of the week. Ellen Pompeo was charming and fun to watch, Abel Folk had the most depth and was very effective, and William Baldwin was...well, William Baldwin. He got to put his martial art training to good use and be a running-jumping-earnest action figure. The rest of the cast was wooden at best, but mostly paper. So - if you're nostalgic about Spain - it's a picture postcard with an action twist, and a healthy dose of El Greco. If not, skip it.

The quality of "Art Heist" is exactly what one should expect from a direct-to-video title with no A-list actors. The plot is predictable, the twists are both expected and excessive, the acting is deficient, and the action is banal. However, it manages to be entertaining in spite of its flaws, and ultimately fulfills expectations, provided those expectations are low.

The plot actually had some promise but is ultimately crippled by the "shocking reveals" that fail to surprise or even engage much interest. Every single twist is painfully described and explained by monologues and flashbacks, even though someone with severe sleep deprivation (me) could fully comprehend each one long before it happened. The script further detracts from the plot by adding dull and unrealistic dialogue, portrayed in an implausible manner according to the amateurish directing. Tropes and clichés abound, from the flower cart in the chase sequence to William Baldwin's channeling of John McClane, and plot holes larger than the escape pod in Star Wars will frequently cause exclamations of, "Wait, why didn't they..."

As far as the acting, quite frankly, not one of these actors should hold any more than a bit part in any film. Ellen Pompeo is cute and Baldwin gives hope simply because he looks like brother Alec, and perhaps they could do fine with a decent script and nonpareil directing, but believing in their characters (or almost any other character) requires a suspension of disbelief beyond my abilities. The worst of all is the couple's "adorable blond girl," portrayed by the director's daughter in a performance unworthy of a 3rd grade school play (to put it nicely). On the bright side, the actors with two lines or fewer do fine, and Simón Andreu stands out as quietly plausible in his role as a Russian mobster/ art connoisseur.

The main redemption of this film comes from the visuals and sound. Not from the explosions or the ridiculous sound effects, but from the beautiful aerial shots of Barcelona, exquisite interiors, depictions of the art (although limited), and the touching rendition of Mozart's "Introitus Requiem." And it tries so hard to keep viewers in suspense and invested in the characters (or at least in the stolen paintings), that one cannot help feeling slightly entertained.

If you want to see a masterpiece or a useful addition to the genre, you will be disappointed. If you just want to see some blood and boobs with an R rating, you will be disappointed. If you appreciate art and hope to see a film that does the same, well, you will be disappointed. However, if you, like me, simply want to watch something because you're bored, insomniac, out of good movies, and looking to be occupied and mildly amused, then this may be worth your time, if not your money. I love heist movies, from "Flawless" to "The Fast and the Furious," so I don't regret wasting 98 minutes on this film.

This effort was like a glitzy TV movie...I don't recall this ever being released in theaters...If so, it must've died a quick death. Watching the DVD, in the comfort of our bedroom, it was obvious this film was meant for not much more...Ed Lauter an art critic with a greed streak? What a fun turn that must've been...I haven't seen Ed since "The Longest Yard"...Everyone else pretty much acted by the numbers, led by Baldwin, except for Pompeo...She had zero charisma and seemed to be sleepwalking thru most of the picture...Pompeo's daughter had one dimension...she played every scene like a lovable little puppy...slowest line delivery of any 3 year old I've seen yet...

The chase scenes gave my wife and I headaches...too much quick-cutting and angle-bashing...If you 're going to shoot a chase scene in Barcelona, you might want a few WIDE shots to exploit the beauty of your backdrop, right? The whole story was pretty implausible and far-fetched, but hey, we liked it better than "The Life Aquatic..."