When Will I Be Loved

I found Toback's earlier film Black and White mildly diverting, so gave this one a whirl. The scuttlebutt was that this was Neve Campbell's best (and sexiest) performance so far. Well, that much may be true-ish, but the rest of this film is, in places, almost unwatchably bad.

Most of the characters (or should I say caricatures - take the Italian mogul: did anybody find this man even remotely believable?) are without a shred of originality, and in the case of Ford, bear virtually no resemblance to human beings of the sort you or I might actually meet. It may be that his relentless hustling is *intended* to show him as a pathetic individual - but there is a fine line between depicting characters we may not like but in whom we can invest some interest as to their fate; and, as happens in this film, showing people who are irredeemably ghastly, and about whose fate we don't give a toss.

In Black and White, Mike Tyson had a very funny cameo, in which Robert Downey Junior's character tries to seduce him. Here, it looks as if Toback has simply raided his address book and shoehorned as many celebrity cameos as he could into what passes for the plot. Ooh, look, there's Lori Singer! Wow, there's Mike Tyson (again). Ooh, that really is Damon Dash! Toback's own performance as the "hilariously" named cross-cultural enabler is pure smugness in a bottle. The only honest moment is when he confesses to wanting to get into Neve Campbell's knickers. We can only speculate as to whether that is a case of art imitating life.

And Neve Campbell? Yes, she is good in this. She gets some decent dialogue to get her teeth into and delivers it with aplomb. I still think Wild Things is a better showcase for her talent.

The incident towards the end of the film was certainly unexpected; but then again, any idiot can make unexpected things happen in a film. The trick is to work up to it in *some* way. Toback is either incapable of doing this, or simply can't be bothered. The dénouement left me shrugging: so what? Who cares about these cardboard cut-outs?

When Will I Be Loved (2004)

* 1/2 (out of 4)

Incredibly bizarre film about a rich slut (Neve Campbell) and her wannabe hustler boyfriend (Fred Weller) who happens to set her up with a rich man (Dominic Chianese) so that they can collect $100,000. Like The Brown Bunny, I'm sure there will be plenty of people who love this film and plenty who hate it. I'm somewhat in the middle but have to lean towards the hate side due to several reasons. This is the type of film where the screenwriter/director thinks he has created the most hip, refreshing and original film and he rubs every scene in the viewers face. Throughout the entire running time the screenplay is full of wannabe smart and hip characters who aren't nearly as hip or as smart as they think. This reflects on the screenplay, which isn't nearly as hip or as smart as it thinks. The director constantly swings the camera as some sort of hip style but once again, it's not hip and it's not stylish. Roger Ebert is one who gave this a full four stars so you can read his review for praise. There are a few good moments including the scene where the rich guy shows up at Campbell's apartment for sex. She questions him and this leads to some interesting moments. The film starts and finishes with Campbell taking a shower and we get to see every inch of her nude body. I suggest you watch these scenes and pretty much skip everything else.

I am sorry, but this might have been the absolute worst film I have ever seen. I am not usually a harsh critic, but this movie made me ashamed to call myself a fan of Neve Campbell's work. It has no plot, makes no sense, begins stories that it doesn't finish, and goes nowhere. In a word, it sucks. I mean, who cares about a spoiled, rich girl and her sexual escapades. And wow - she's like girls too. A novelty in twenty-first century film-making. Not even the sex scenes were stimulating. Personally, I could have done quite well without being subjected to Neve's pained expressions while being done from behind by her slimy pimp of a boyfriend. And what is with the "African" professor? He is there in the beginning, and then suddenly he's just gone (thank god). I'm not sure if the fact that it is barely over an hour long is a positive or a negative. Negative, because who wants to pay what it costs today to see a film for a mere hour of movie-watching, but positive because I don't think I could have stood a minute longer of such utter crap. I don't think I have ever seen so many people walk out of a theatre mid-movie. The only reason I didn't leave myself was my unfulfilled hope that somehow the movie would redeem itself with an interesting ending. Apologies for my crudeness, but crap is truly what this wannabe Cruel Intentions meets Wild Things meets Indecent Proposal is.

Sexual being Vera Barrie (Neve Campbell) is hired by African studies Professor Hassan Al-Ibrahim Ben Rabinowitz (James Toback) as his assistant. Hustler Ford Welles (Frederick Weller) is working for wealthy Italian Count Tommaso Lupo (Dominic Chianese). He convinces sex partner Vera to spend time with the count for $100k.

I remember the main selling point for this was Neve getting naked. With the recent revelations about James Toback, it's impossible to separate the man from his work. Luckily, his work here isn't good and I'm not conflicted about crapping on this. I only feel bad for Neve Campbell. She was obviously trying to do an art indie as she searched for her place in Hollywood. The other notable is a cameo from pre-tattoo Mike Tyson. It may be one of his last appearance before his tattoo. All the cameo starting with Toback himself are disconnected. They make this guerrilla indie fractured like a student film. The central premise holds some problems mainly with the money. Surely, Vera would want a 50/50 split before the meeting. After getting paid, she could try to buy him off. The conflict could still happen after he finds out the secret but in a different way. The money part lacks credibility. Sadly, Neve's nudity is all that's left. Through it all, she somehow maintains her dignity which is far more than can be hoped for. Toback probably spent more time lining up cameo rather than writing a compelling script. Toback is unable to advance beyond his sad experience.

James Toback's When Will Be Loved has a very, loose, ramshackle quality that it is ill-suited for. As the film opens, it cuts back and forth, jarringly, between Fred Weller rambling on his cell phone, and Neve Campbell taking a shower. The music even changes between each cut..and it's just so sloppily done, and unfortunately, the rest of the film, for the most part, is just as sloppy. Between the music being way too damn loud (whoever mixed the sound on this film did a lousy-ass job!), or certain scenes being more or less pointless, the film is a just a ramshackle, sloppy mess. Does the scene where Neve runs into Lori Singer in the park add anything? Other than perhaps killing time...no. Is the scene with Mike Tyson necessary? No, again it adds nothing, wastes time. And the threesome in the park scene? Not needed either...as we already know Weller is a small-time bum, out for his own gratification. Why is Chianese's character a Count? That's just ridiculous..and it seriously undercuts the believability of his character...and yet his sequence with Campbell is the only one in the film that really works. The rest of it......not so much. This is primarily because of the tired,tired stereotypical small time hustler character that Weller is given to play. Weller does what he can, and is occasionally amusing, but on the whole, we've seen this character too many damn times...we know right away that he has no connections, is a liar, a loser, etc. Knowing that, watching this character is quite irritating, as it offers no surprises, but plenty o' stale crap we have to sit through. This movie is just a mess. Not completely bad, but mostly, a ramshackle mess.