Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna

Like an Expensive Melodramatic Indian Soap Opera In New York Karan Johar attempts to make a 'so-called mature' movie but the handling of the themes and the storytelling is very amateur. Many of the comedic sequences, especially the silly ones like 'black beast' (racist?) were cringe inducing. Much of the dialogues are the kind you would hear in soap operas.

The characters are poorly written. Rhea is supposed to be a strong woman who loves her job and family and while her quality time with family is limited, her excuse to Dev is that she's 'forced' to be the 'man' of the family? This is not the kind of thing one would hear a strong independent woman say. Then there's Maya, who is also a strong character and yet she lets herself be treated so harshly by Dev. Sexy Sam is quite a pathetic caricature blend of a sleazy Casanova-type old hag (who only seems to sleep with white girls that are about 40 years younger than him) and the loving father who's there for his son and whatever.

The last hour is so laughable because of the sheer awfulness in execution, acting and writing. Johar's direction lacks aim and focus while his script seriously lacks consistency. The overall soundtrack is far from memorable but two songs are quite beautiful: 'Tumhi Dekho Na' (artistically shot) and 'Mitwa'. Not surprisingly, the background score is heavily intrusive.

Shahrukh Khan pretty much overacts in every single one of his scenes. Dev isn't supposed to be likable nor sympathetic but the way Khan plays him is frustrating to the viewer especially with his overdone expressions and measured tone of voice. In my opinion, this is perhaps Rani Mukherjee's worst performance to date. She fails to demonstrate the complexity and depth of Maya and could someone ask Rani or Johar why Maya keeps crying so much? Abhishek Bachchan tries to be funny and charming but he's not entirely convincing which, unintentionally, makes it easy to understand why Maya doesn't want him. Amitabh Bachchan is incredibly irritating as Sexy Sam (though he is not as bad as Khan) but otherwise he does a fine job in a number of sequences, especially the ones with Kiron Kher. Kher is quite superb as the grounded mother and Sam's confidant. Preity Zinta stands out as she delivers an impressively restrained performance with grace and élan. She easily steals the show from Bachchan, Khan and Mukherjee.

It's interesting that Johar has attempted to tackle a mature contemporary theme and even though he failed, I think his intentions were sincere. Perhaps, this is a path Johar shouldn't tread yet.

Well first of all, i would like to say that this film by Karan Johar disappoints many. I watched the film a day before it was released nationwide, and i was very disappointed at the result. The film plot is hard to believe at times, and only 2 or 3 scenes were of the Karan Johar quality that i used to know out of all the 3hrs and 11 minutes. The film concentrated on Shah Rukh and Rani too much, that after a while i got bored of them. The first half was very slow, and was shot in the familiar setting of Kal Ho Naa Ho. I was very impressed by Abhishek Bachchan, as he really shone in this film as so did Preity Zinta. Amitabh Bachchan was his usual great self and brought a little comedy into the film. Kirron Kehr was also appealing in the film. The second half picked up a little speed but the plot was very slow, and dragged on a little at times. The songs were pictured beautifully and i think the songs were the highlight of the film. Overall, i did not enjoy this film, and i am very disappointed at what should have been a great film to see, considering the cast and budget.

I make onion poha for breakfast thrice a week, with the bare minimum ingredients possible. One day I tried to experiment some (inspired by the stalls outside my Engineering college) and tried some sugar (caramelized onions anyone?), extra turmeric and some red chilli powder. The result was anything but edible but I humbly gulped it down.

KANK is an honest attempt to break away from the mauled of sugary romances by the new age love guru Karan Johar. An honest attempt, huh? Its the result that speaks volumes in the age of fast-food and fast-love. What we get to witness this time is not the time tested elaborate shaadis, karwa chauths or the big fat Indian family reunions, reminiscent of his and Yash "uncle's" earlier movies. This time its the bold subject of infidelity - the sensitive (ahem!) portrayal of seeking love outside a loveless (???) marriage. How far does Karan succeed? Lets check it out through the eyes of a neutral, unassuming viewer.

KANK is the story about Dev (Shahrukh), a footballer whose career dreams are broken along with his leg when he meets with a freak accident, which makes him a recluse. His ever complaining ways puts his marriage with Rhea (Priety), a successful woman, on the rocks. In another part of New York city, there is marital tension between Rishi (Abhishek), & Maya (Rani) for reasons only known to Karan dude. Maya is a cleanliness freak and doesn't know why she is married to Rishi even after 4 years being together. She thinks that she is trapped in a loveless marriage, whereas her hubby still goes ga-ga over her. In the midst of all this mayhem, we have the swinging sexagenarian Sam (Big B) who could be the poster boy for Viagra and Dev's endearing mom played by Kirron Kher.

Its baffling to comprehend the first meeting between the protagonists Dev & Maya on the latter's wedding day and the subsequent exchange of words between total strangers. She is confused about the marriage right from the word go due to godforsaken reasons. Cut to the present times and the duo meet up under similarly make-belief circumstances. The sequences revolving around a bizarre character "Black Beast" is corny to the core (now I wish I had seen Krrish!). The first half is laced with incoherent scenes like these, barring a few. The screen lights up whenever Big B is there, he provides the much desired light-hearted moments. His tete-a-tete with Kirron Kher is quite funny.

Well, coming back to the crux of the movie, the protagonists become pally, meet up regularly and discuss ways to save their crumbling marriages. At this point, Karan dude goes over the top again and gives us the work which resembles that of an overzealous amateur. The scenes where Maya teaches Dev the art of giving a good massage in a furniture store and Karan trying it on his wife and Maya metamorphosing into a seductive hunterwaali clearly takes the movie to abysmal levels. Then the inevitable happens, the duo become too close for comfort and decide to cheat on their respective spouses - what set out as mending work created a bigger monster.

Now lets talk about the performances, which forms the most important aspect of a Karan Johar movie as he employs the best in the industry. Shahrukh plays the role of Dev with conviction and nobody else could have bettered him here, but hey wait a minute, haven't I seen the same expressions in half a dozen of his earlier movies? Rani is competent but one hardly tends to sympathize with her character inspite of crying a bucketful. Abhishek Bachchan is the surprise packet, he goes through a range of emotions as if he is already a veteran, great acting from the junior. Priety looks glamorous and in a couple of scenes manages to overshadow king Khan too, but was that cleavage show necessary? Kirron Kher too does a great job but its Big B who again proves yet again that he is the real king and this time he gives a certain Mr.Hashmi a run for his money. He is ice cool in the first half and philanthropic towards the latter stages.

All said and done, the stellar cast raises the bar of the movie but then to what extent? A movie with such a half baked plot and treatment can't be saved from the obvious, it disappoints. The screenplay leaves a lot to be desired and that poses a question in front of Karan dude - Is it really worth to break away from the mauled? An ardent fan of his movies would be satisfied watching the protagonists running around trees and mustard fields and elaborate traditional celebrations of filthy rich families.

Nowadays I make onion pohas with a dash of lemon and they taste just fine. I guess I've learnt that the right way of making it by pondering over my mistakes, without going overboard with experimentation. Good luck Mr Johar!

• Magnificent sets

• Intricate art design

• Designer costumes

• Eye-pleasing visuals

• Loads of celebrations

• A Punjabi track with bikini babes

• Feel-good factor

• Trademark Shahrukh Khan

• Complimentary Kajol fluttering sari for a 5 second song appearance

• Predicted houseful openings

Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna has all the regular contents of a Karan Johar extravaganza. Plus a story this time!

In 1981, Yash Chopra made Silsila on extra-marital affairs that was considered ahead of its times. The culmination of its theme, however, was as per the Indian sensibilities of those times. 25 years later, Karan Johar makes a film on extra-marital affairs (am not drawing any parallels between the two films whatsoever) and the culmination of the plot makes it the so called 'different' or a 'bold' film.

A bold film is not about sex, skin or sleaze. It's about matured mindsets and moving ahead with times. Karan also moves ahead with KANK. In terms of its plot outlines, while Kuch Kuch Hota Hai was an overrated triangular love story and Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Ghum was just another conventional family drama, Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna has a comparatively sensible and substantial story to back the candy floss on the screen.

The story, as everybody and their second cousin by now know, is about an extra marital affair.

The visual appeal in a Karan Johar film is, like always, intricate and immaculate. Be it Anil Mehta's eye-pleasing camera-work, Sharmista Roy's appealing art design, Manish Malhotra's fashion fiesta or Farah Khan's cosmic choreography, everyone is just perfect in their department.

But as I earlier said, apart from the visual dazzlery, the movie clicks because it has something to say in which it succeeds. Karan always had heart in his films; here he puts in a lot of soul too. Shibani Bhatija who earlier wrote the overrated Fanaa this year, co-writes a more cohesive, convincing and a satisfying screenplay for KANK with Karan Johar. The comic scenes are very well written while the emotional ones are deftly acted and executed. Dialogues vary from the tongue-in-cheek lines in the lighthearted scenes to the regular ones in the emotional outbursts. Niranjan Iyenger's witty one-liners compliment the funny scenes without a glitch.

Also the screenplay balances the bittersweet act and maintains the equilibrium. While a Karan Johar film is broadly envisaged as a compulsive tearjerker, KANK has sufficient light-hearted frivolous relief in the first half. The scene where Rani Mukherjee tries to impersonate a BDSM girl is outrageously hilarious. If you go to compare KANK with Karan's earlier works, the tone of the film is more like a Kal Ho Naa Ho (which was written by Karan) as compared to his over-dramatic first two directions. In fact what sets the film apart from the daily soaps on the idiot box (each one of which is based on an extra-marital affair) is that the performances never get overtly melodramatic even in the emotional outbursts.

The pace is slow and the movie does get stretched in the second half. The conclusion could have been impermeable to the audiences' mentality but the screenplay has enough conviction to make it digestible. And while Karan took excuses of the bhartiya sanskriti and parampara in his first two films, here thankfully he stays free from the culture crap and sanskaar endorsements. On the contrary, KANK strides against the clichés in culture to make its own way. And the best part is that it doesn't do this blatantly.

Of course while going off-route, there are some elements where he arguably takes the fast-forward path. Like Amitabh Bachchan's characterization of a philandering sexagenarian might not gel well with the Indian sensibilities. But since his character adds a comic angle to the film and isn't the central focus either, one doesn't take it quite seriously. Still, the idea of imagining Amitabh Bachchan and his character sleeping with a new whore every night, without a trace of repentance and with the full knowledge of his son, isn't easily digestible.

What's notable in this film is that rather than just being the usual Chopra-Johar escapist cinema, it has a lot of realism too. For instance Shahrukh in KANK is not just the regular lover-boy. Though he continues his legacy of wooing the female species and taking away a woman from his initial partner in the film (he has been doing this since ever), he still isn't that man who makes things happen for others. The Dev Saran of KANK has a lot of vulnerability in him that makes him much human rather than the regular perfectionist SRK (of films like Main Hoon Na, Mohobbatien or Kal Ho Naa Ho) who plays the peacemaker and makes things happen for others. Imperfection makes Dev Saran real rather than starry.

In an age of breaking marriages and failing relationships, the movie's portrayal of the incompatibility in marital bonding is something that a contemporary audience can relate to. In a film that demands a lot of emotional play, the performances are as natural as it can get. Preity Zinta has the spunk to carry off the career woman character, Abhishek has a melting intensity, Rani only gets better like an old wine and Shahrukh, despite indulging in his trademark antiques, is acceptable for his character's vulnerability.

I am not a hardcore Karan Johar fan, neither am I cynical about his flamboyant films. I watched KANK with an open mind and without preconceived notions. So on the credit of its content, KANK ended up being neither a superlative piece of cinema nor the abysmal film tagged by its hypercritical detractors. It's just the perfect balance of entertainment.

Maturity, sensibility and entertainment increased in direct proportion from Karan Johar's K2H2 to K3G to KHNH. KANK continues the trend.

I found KANK riveting from the first moment to the last. The theme is one which has been used before in Indian movies but this one makes it seem an entirely new venture. The treatment is fresh and witty. There is a wonderful mix of clever jokes, satire and excellent appropriate dialogue.The script did not have a word out of place. The film took you along on a roller coaster of emotion. The characters were all human and imperfect but with endearing qualities. The situation too understandable but the sympathies were definitely with the lovers.

But the film was much more than the words that I have used. It wrapped the audience in its embrace with its story which unravelled in wit and charm and against a background of New York lovingly portrayed. The train station was a perfect locale though always not always recognisably the Central.

The performances were very good especially Amitabh and Preity Zinta. Abhishek and Rani were good too though Rani cried a bit too much- but that could be Karan's over use of glycerine.

Shah Rukh dominated the film in a brilliant,nuanced, versatile performance given in a very difficult role. He is a cynic and a loser but he keeps the sympathies of the audience and his charm reaches out palpably. It is one of his best performances to date and what more can one say - Shah Rukh at his best is the very best of all. He is the man after one's heart-funny, witty, tragic and heartbreaking.

The music is amazing especially Mitwa movingly picturised on Shah Rukh. This should prove not only a box office super hit but also a herald of the new Indian movies though not many will come close.