Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna

....Karan Johar for KANK!

I was waiting with so much excitement for this movie only to have my hopes dashed in the biggest way possible. I have loved some of Karan Johar's earlier films and thoroughly enjoyed them. However, I think this time around, he has completely got it wrong! (Which is OK because we are all humans and we make mistakes). This being a Rs500 million one.

This movie dragged on endlessly. The only salvation to all this... Amitabh Bachchan and Abishek Bachchan, who stole the show with their on-screen chemistry.

Is this movie worth a watch? No...not unless you have absolutely nothing better to do. Even then, I'd recommend chewing or biting your arm off as a better option.

I really don't understand how people can have so much hate against this movie. No offence, but i think some people over analyse movies way too much and try so hard to find meaning and concepts in the movie which aren't there because they weren't intended. Some people don't seem to 'understand' how Dev falls in love with Maya (vice-versa) or how they could salvage such love for that prolonged period of time after they separate from their spouses, and I think that's one of the stupidest thinks to not 'understand' if you are an avid Bollywood movie fan. There have been countless examples of such prolonged and unexplainable love in Bollywood movies in the past and it seems quite unfair to judge this movie badly for that aspect alone. I don't know if it seems highly improbable to the audiences around the world of how they continually keep on meeting each other, but it's another common example found in Bollywood films. Some scenes (I agree) could have been perceived better but the music (and accompanying scenes) I feel was beautifully sweet. The point is, Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna was quite a beautifully shot story of adorable love, and portrays challenges with marriage and love (although it has been done before and sometimes better) and with fair acting on some and excellent for others (I was highly impressed with Abishek's performance ^^). Appreciate it for what it was and (im saying the stupidly obvious but..) if you've found such unforgivable flaws then try and think how you'd fix them.

One of the most awaited films of the year is KANK. I'm a Karan Johar fan and I must say, he has excelled as a director. After his recent successes Kuch Kuch Hota Hai and Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham, KANK is another masterpiece.

Shah Rukh Khan takes a bold role in this film and does well as a short tempered, disgruntled man. Some of the scenes with Preity and his son were funny. Preity looked pretty as always. Rani also was OK, though the character Maya was too complicated.

Big B and Abhishek were the best in the film. Amithabh playing the old but youthful man who is still the wise 'Samarjit' behind 'Sexy Sam' was very good. Abhishek did well in the emotional scenes but stole the chow in the comic scenes.

Overall, KANK was a good film, but the affair of Dev and Maya was pointless and stupid, I didn't like it one bit. Songs were good like 'Where's the party tonight' and 'Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna'. The film was good.

Worth a Watch.

Like an Expensive Melodramatic Indian Soap Opera In New York Karan Johar attempts to make a 'so-called mature' movie but the handling of the themes and the storytelling is very amateur. Many of the comedic sequences, especially the silly ones like 'black beast' (racist?) were cringe inducing. Much of the dialogues are the kind you would hear in soap operas.

The characters are poorly written. Rhea is supposed to be a strong woman who loves her job and family and while her quality time with family is limited, her excuse to Dev is that she's 'forced' to be the 'man' of the family? This is not the kind of thing one would hear a strong independent woman say. Then there's Maya, who is also a strong character and yet she lets herself be treated so harshly by Dev. Sexy Sam is quite a pathetic caricature blend of a sleazy Casanova-type old hag (who only seems to sleep with white girls that are about 40 years younger than him) and the loving father who's there for his son and whatever.

The last hour is so laughable because of the sheer awfulness in execution, acting and writing. Johar's direction lacks aim and focus while his script seriously lacks consistency. The overall soundtrack is far from memorable but two songs are quite beautiful: 'Tumhi Dekho Na' (artistically shot) and 'Mitwa'. Not surprisingly, the background score is heavily intrusive.

Shahrukh Khan pretty much overacts in every single one of his scenes. Dev isn't supposed to be likable nor sympathetic but the way Khan plays him is frustrating to the viewer especially with his overdone expressions and measured tone of voice. In my opinion, this is perhaps Rani Mukherjee's worst performance to date. She fails to demonstrate the complexity and depth of Maya and could someone ask Rani or Johar why Maya keeps crying so much? Abhishek Bachchan tries to be funny and charming but he's not entirely convincing which, unintentionally, makes it easy to understand why Maya doesn't want him. Amitabh Bachchan is incredibly irritating as Sexy Sam (though he is not as bad as Khan) but otherwise he does a fine job in a number of sequences, especially the ones with Kiron Kher. Kher is quite superb as the grounded mother and Sam's confidant. Preity Zinta stands out as she delivers an impressively restrained performance with grace and élan. She easily steals the show from Bachchan, Khan and Mukherjee.

It's interesting that Johar has attempted to tackle a mature contemporary theme and even though he failed, I think his intentions were sincere. Perhaps, this is a path Johar shouldn't tread yet.

I make onion poha for breakfast thrice a week, with the bare minimum ingredients possible. One day I tried to experiment some (inspired by the stalls outside my Engineering college) and tried some sugar (caramelized onions anyone?), extra turmeric and some red chilli powder. The result was anything but edible but I humbly gulped it down.

KANK is an honest attempt to break away from the mauled of sugary romances by the new age love guru Karan Johar. An honest attempt, huh? Its the result that speaks volumes in the age of fast-food and fast-love. What we get to witness this time is not the time tested elaborate shaadis, karwa chauths or the big fat Indian family reunions, reminiscent of his and Yash "uncle's" earlier movies. This time its the bold subject of infidelity - the sensitive (ahem!) portrayal of seeking love outside a loveless (???) marriage. How far does Karan succeed? Lets check it out through the eyes of a neutral, unassuming viewer.

KANK is the story about Dev (Shahrukh), a footballer whose career dreams are broken along with his leg when he meets with a freak accident, which makes him a recluse. His ever complaining ways puts his marriage with Rhea (Priety), a successful woman, on the rocks. In another part of New York city, there is marital tension between Rishi (Abhishek), & Maya (Rani) for reasons only known to Karan dude. Maya is a cleanliness freak and doesn't know why she is married to Rishi even after 4 years being together. She thinks that she is trapped in a loveless marriage, whereas her hubby still goes ga-ga over her. In the midst of all this mayhem, we have the swinging sexagenarian Sam (Big B) who could be the poster boy for Viagra and Dev's endearing mom played by Kirron Kher.

Its baffling to comprehend the first meeting between the protagonists Dev & Maya on the latter's wedding day and the subsequent exchange of words between total strangers. She is confused about the marriage right from the word go due to godforsaken reasons. Cut to the present times and the duo meet up under similarly make-belief circumstances. The sequences revolving around a bizarre character "Black Beast" is corny to the core (now I wish I had seen Krrish!). The first half is laced with incoherent scenes like these, barring a few. The screen lights up whenever Big B is there, he provides the much desired light-hearted moments. His tete-a-tete with Kirron Kher is quite funny.

Well, coming back to the crux of the movie, the protagonists become pally, meet up regularly and discuss ways to save their crumbling marriages. At this point, Karan dude goes over the top again and gives us the work which resembles that of an overzealous amateur. The scenes where Maya teaches Dev the art of giving a good massage in a furniture store and Karan trying it on his wife and Maya metamorphosing into a seductive hunterwaali clearly takes the movie to abysmal levels. Then the inevitable happens, the duo become too close for comfort and decide to cheat on their respective spouses - what set out as mending work created a bigger monster.

Now lets talk about the performances, which forms the most important aspect of a Karan Johar movie as he employs the best in the industry. Shahrukh plays the role of Dev with conviction and nobody else could have bettered him here, but hey wait a minute, haven't I seen the same expressions in half a dozen of his earlier movies? Rani is competent but one hardly tends to sympathize with her character inspite of crying a bucketful. Abhishek Bachchan is the surprise packet, he goes through a range of emotions as if he is already a veteran, great acting from the junior. Priety looks glamorous and in a couple of scenes manages to overshadow king Khan too, but was that cleavage show necessary? Kirron Kher too does a great job but its Big B who again proves yet again that he is the real king and this time he gives a certain Mr.Hashmi a run for his money. He is ice cool in the first half and philanthropic towards the latter stages.

All said and done, the stellar cast raises the bar of the movie but then to what extent? A movie with such a half baked plot and treatment can't be saved from the obvious, it disappoints. The screenplay leaves a lot to be desired and that poses a question in front of Karan dude - Is it really worth to break away from the mauled? An ardent fan of his movies would be satisfied watching the protagonists running around trees and mustard fields and elaborate traditional celebrations of filthy rich families.

Nowadays I make onion pohas with a dash of lemon and they taste just fine. I guess I've learnt that the right way of making it by pondering over my mistakes, without going overboard with experimentation. Good luck Mr Johar!