User reviews

After watching this movie, I just couldn't stop talking about it. Mind you, not in the sense that someone can't stop talking about a great book or show, but more along the line of how someone can't stop talking about their colonoscopy during a diner conversation. In other words, after seeing this you can't help but try and remove the stain it left on your very soul by vomiting out the experience onto others.

This movie entered with the tag line of being "written by two of the six writers of 'Scary Movie'!" What they forgot to mention is that the two who wrote it were only responsible for writing the credits and all the jokes deleted for the sake of not causing mass suicide. Put more delicately, this movie almost makes Pootie Tang look Oscar worthy, which ironically enough was made fun of in the last Scary Movie for being horrid. Coincidence? Yeah, not even some sort of Karma dealing fiend would wish this movie upon the world.

"So," you ask, "What makes it so bad?" I bet your thinking that all of the funny stuff was in the previews, right? No, actually there was no funny content in the previews at all, it just seemed that way when taken out of the context of the movie. Much the same way "Hogan's Heroes" was funny to people who weren't in Auschwitz during the Holocaust, the previews are funny to those who haven't seen the movie. When you actually see the movie, you start to ask, "Why was that funny in the preview?" The answer: You can see pretty flowers if you ignore the fact that they are growing from the corpse of a man who died during a freak green house accident.

Do yourself a favor, rent a History channel documentary on the history of documentaries and hit yourself in the head with a hammer. It'll be twice as funny, make three times more sense, and be only a fifth as painful.

...but rather just a list of movies that the filmmakers wanted to parody, strung together by the weakest plot in film history and a lot of unfunny jokes.

You would think that the team responsible for the mess of a movie that was Date Movie would at least have learned something from their last film to help them avoid the same mistakes, but they didn't.

It would appear they spent more time making parodies as visually accurate as they could and spent almost no time trying to make the film entertaining. Some of the parodies seem completely out of place and don't even fit into what little plot there is.

I couldn't recommend this film to anyone, not even those I hated.

In the past 10 years, I've probably seen more than 200 movies at theaters. This is the first movie that I've ever walked out on. 45 minutes in, I couldn't handle the torture anymore. This is the most unfunny piece of garbage I've ever seen. Although, I did get a good chuckle when about 50% of the audience had left before the halfway mark.

It's hard to meet the minimum post-length requirement for this movie, because there isn't much to say about it.

I didn't find any of the gags clever. Nor did I find them funny. I did think some of the set designs looked okay. The casting directors also found someone who looked surprisingly like Jack Black, although sadly the script didn't give him anything funny to do.

Just avoid this. It's not even worth a rental.

I will admit I didn't see this until a couple of days ago, and I was really hesitant of seeing it, after reading a lot of negative reviews on the film, and after seeing the excrement that is Disaster Movie. And let me tell you, after seeing this travesty for myself, I can't agree more with the negativity. While not quite as monstrous as Disaster Movie, Epic Movie(more like Epic Dud) is a truly terrible movie. There are absolutely no redeeming qualities here. The humour just isn't funny. It is crude, vulgar, over-familiar and even contrived, and the constant flashing of breasts was way overdone. The acting was really amateur, Jennifer Coolidge and Carmen Electra get my vote as the worst actresses in the movie, and believe me that is not saying much. The Willy Wonka spoof was just as tired as the movie itself. And as a parody of films like Pirates of the Caribbean and chronicles of Narnia, it falls well short in terms of sophistication. The writing is unbelievably bad, the characters are annoying and the plot just isn't there. The music was awful, and the pirate rap was torturously bad. I will say right now, that I don't like any of the recent Friedberg-Seltzer movies, merely because not only do I feel that there is a complete lack of comedic talent in their films, but also their films come across as a complete waste of time. And just like Disaster Movie, I seriously was considering turning the film off 20 minutes in, that's how painful I found it. All in all, probably not quite the worst movie ever, but along with movies like Home Alone 4, NeverEnding Story 3 and Freddy Got Fingered, it is close. A complete disaster of epic proportions, and one to avoid, even if you're thinking of renting. I'm not trying to sound harsh, I am just trying to explain as much as I can what I feel about the movie. 1/10 Bethany Cox

Epic Movie (2007) is total crap, no beating around the bush here, it was so bad it actually angered me that i paid to view this turkey and i wanted a refund, i felt cheated, the only reason i didn't cause a fuss at the cinema was the fact that something very funny happened...... a singing chant started in the audience (of about 12 people), and it went something like this, why are we watching, why are we watching, why are we watchinggggg this piece of CRAP!!!! I didn't have a clue what was going on, the 'script' was idiotic, the actors were totally lame and annoying and the jokes were pathetic and UNFUNNY, how this ever made it to the silver screen i'll never know.

I advise anyone who's thinking of going to see this piece of JUNK, to stay well clear and save their money, thank you and GOODNIGHT! 0/10

There is nothing original here whatsoever-same old big breast jokes, oral sex jokes; sloppy tongue-kissing, spoofing of movies not necessarily worth spoofing, and using the same old actors (i.e. Adam Campbell) from other horrible spoofing movies. It is disappointing to see that actors who have received some acclaim from both critics and the public alike have starred in this-the worst movie ever made-worse than Grease 2. And only a few minutes longer than a regular TV show except without interesting commercials, it is highway robbery to make anyone pay to see this half-baked movie where writers, producers, actors and directors have only put half an effort to do something that at least would be satisfactory. And half is giving them too much credit. Unfortunately for Kal Penn, Jennifer Coolidge, Faune A. Chambers and Crispin Glover (you waited for this movie to return to the big screen? where were you last couple of years? in detox?), I won't be running to the theatre any time soon to see one of their movies any time soon.

Studio decision-makers have to take a stand against these movies-and so does the industry. Pre-teens, teens and young adults have shown that they have interests in seeing well-written, acted, developed and intelligent movies. Don't take the easy way out to do these useless piece of junk.

Some movies are funny, some are not. This movie may be funny to you, if you liked Date Movie, since both films are pretty much the same in cast and script quality.

Epic Movie is a loosely strung together collection of slap-stick comedy sketches based on various epic movies (Pirates of the Caribbean, Nacho Libre, Chronicles of Narnia, X-Men, Superman, etc...) so it's probably helpful if you have seen a few of the epics this movie takes off at, to understand the jokes used. (If you've seen the clips during MTV video awards, you get the idea on the kind of jokes I'm referring to). Epic Movie tries to cash in on the Scary Movie, Date Movie, "Movie" Movie franchise, but doesn't measure up to the originality shown in the Scary Movie series.

It doesn't take a genius to recommend that you save your box-office ticket money, and if you're interested, wait for the DVD, since this isn't an essential big screen movie.

Save your money! Save your eyes and ears the indignity of watching or hearing this film. Any jokes they thought up were one-liners, which were promptly turned into entire scenes or musical numbers, thereby killing both ideas stone dead.

The sound cut out at the showing I saw. Strangely, this made the experience less appalling for about ten minutes as we didn't have to hear the awful dialogue - the audience were coming up with better jokes themselves.

The studio would be best advised to release a single DVD of this, and microwave it.

It's not enough that we, the movie going public, are forced to put up with half of the crappy films "Epic Movie" attempts to parody, but we're also forced to contend with "Epic Movie" itself. In regards to this film, and all others like it, I find myself scratching my head and begging the question: "How in the Hell did this movie ever get made?" While I've yet to receive any official response from the filmmakers behind this atrocity, I have come up with my own theory...

Hollywood hates us. Wait, scratch that; Hollywood doesn't just hate us; they think we're stupid, insignificant creatures of habit, too. That we're nothing but a bunch of mindless apes willing to throw our hard-earned bananas down on any old piece of crap they manage to squeeze out that week. And it saddens me to acknowledge that to a large degree, they're right. We do throw our bananas down on just any old thing, as proved by "Epic Movie" being number one at the big B.O. opening weekend. How could we be so stupid as to fall for a film boasting a lame concept written by a bunch of comedic hacks who think "I'm Rick James B***h!" jokes are still relevant--let alone funny? I feel sorry for people like Kal Penn, Fred Willard, Jennifer Coolidge, and Crispin Glover who seem to have become so jaded with their careers that they could confuse accepting this cinematic skidmark on their resume as something remotely resembling a good idea. Especially in Penn's case, as he's on the verge of shattering the Kumar image most people still associate with him.

"Epic Movie" is supposed to be a comedy, but there's nothing funny about it. Every joke falls flat due to either being poorly executed, uninspired, or just plain irrelevant. I'm all for parodies, but this film is so unfunny; it's not even funny.

Oh, and next time--God forbid there is one--for "Epic Movie II," why not try parodying truly epic movies? "Spartacus" or "Citizen Kane" or "Battlefield Earth?" At least try to follow your own stinking premise...for once.

What a disastrous piece of film.

If you are looking for something completely un-original, embarrassingly un-funny and down right cringe worthy, then this is the ideal movie for you.

I feel like a lesser person after watching it and as if nothing will ever make up for the what felt like an eternity I wasted on watching it.

It simply continues to deteriorate with every passing minute until I could do nothing but wish for the ending.

My advice would be to not waste any time or effort on watching this movie of epic disappointment, as I myself literally had to suppress the urge to physically destroy the DVD

Worst film EVER! I understand that this film is similar to Scary Movie, however Scary Movie has at least some funny parts, where as Epic Movie is just terrible. The acting is poor, no story line (...even though I knew that there was not going to be much of one), the script was shocking and the jokes, which the film all about, simply NOT FUNNY. I'm not sure if my expectations are set too high after watching "HOT FUZZ" (which is amazing by the way) but it didn't make me laugh. For the first time ever I have tried to get my money back from the cinema and believe me I have seen some bad films but this took the biscuit. Please don't waste your money on this film and encourage more.

This movie was really really bad. Forgive the pun, but it was epically bad. I went to the movie to fill time between some business I was conducting in New York and my flight that was leaving at 7pm.. I had several hours to kill.

There are no good scenes in this movie. I think I laughed at one joke within the first 5 or 10 minutes. The plot (if you could actually say there was one) was so stupid that it borders on the criminal. Anyone (actor, writer, director, or producer) should be jailed for 1 year for participating in the production of this film.

I would provide spoilers for this movie, but that would mean there is something worth spoiling.

I actually felt embarrassed for the actors. I had to leave after 30 minutes. For the first 20 minutes I thought to myself.. "this just can't be.. a movie that looks like it was filmed using one camera in a decorated high school auditorium".. "there's got to be a joke somewhere".. but alas, at the 30th minute, I could no longer justify wasting my life. The movie just never happened.

I want my $11.00 back Hollywood! Stop defrauding the public!!

In fact, counting holes in the ceiling would be healthier for your brain cells than this. The ceiling's holes would show more creativity and humor than the script of this film, and they would act better than the people in it, too. I'd compare this thing to the foul smell of a rotten egg, but it's worse than that. The talentless Friedberg & Seltzer are back from their Date Movie debacle with more trashy, unfunny "spoofs". For example, a bullet bounced off of Superman's eye in his movie; now, the bullet pokes his eye out. Gee is that original and hilarious or what? Not a single joke works, and the only surprise of this movie is that these two hacks keep getting funding to produce flop after flop.

This is just so painfully bad. If you ever find a lost DVD of this movie somewhere, leave it there. It's not worth the effort to pick it up.

I wasn't expecting much when I paid for my ticket to see this film, however this was the first time I actually considered leaving the theatre in the middle of a film because it was so bad.

The main issue about this film is originality. This movie is merely a re-shoot of all the films it parodies with different actors. There is no originality in the script, the writers seemed to just bundle a whole heap of scripts of the movies they were parodying together and added childish slapstick bits here and there along with repetitive MTV references that never varied. This made the film boring.

The main parody of the film is The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe. Those who have seen the film want to see a clever parody not to see every scene in the film re-enacted by terrible actors. If the movie had been any longer than 90 minutes I swear I could have shot myself.

The film also recycles old jokes used in other terrible Friedman and Seltzerparodies. For example, Peter, Edward, Susan and Lucy are meant to be siblings and have the same parents yet are portrayed as a mix of black and white actors. This joke was used in the abysmal Date Movie, as the biological family consisted of a black father, Indian mother,and white and Chinese daughters. This joke was not funny in either of the films.

Not Only does the film recycle old jokes from previous parodies but also recycles jokes within the movie, Jayma Mays kicking the beaver wasn't funny the first time, so why do it again.

I just hope Friedman and Seltzer run out of genres to make films about.

The film does nothing but expand on the trailer, I recommend that if you want to see the film, watch the trailer and save the money you would've spent on the movie ticket.

i'm never going to watch this movie again . when me and my friends went to see this movie we thought it was pg but when we saw it after 15 min we said lets go out of here this movie from the beginning to end its violence and sexual i think that first of all they should bring their children to watch the movie and see that the move should be rated r and please don't let your children to watch a movie like this its terrible because then they learn it and they will say it somewhere and its not mature and any one else say that this move is great then bring a 10 yr old and ask them how was the movie should it be rated pg?never watch this movie again because the people that like this movie they are mature if u don't believe me go watch this movie only for 15 min.

I am a HUGE fan of spoof movies. Naked Gun series, Fatal Instinct, Wrongfully Accused, Scary Movie series, Date Movie, and Not Another Teen Movie are all movies I watch on a regular basis. According to the commercials, this was going to be another one to add to my collection.....WRONG!!!! I was so disgusted. I kept waiting for a payoff, something, anything. It was so flat, even the actors seemed embarrassed. Obviously the studio was planning on hyping the movie knowing that the first weekend is all the movie was going to have. Yes, there were a few (and I do mean a few) funny parts, but this entire movie could have been condensed into a MadTV skit that would have been just perfect. I literally fell asleep during the movie. Now, how many people do you know that fall asleep during a "comedy"? I absolutely will not be attending another movie from these guys until after the first few weekends. I know if you were like me you would have to go see it for yourself and make your own determination, but please, I beg you, do not see this movie, do not buy or rent the DVD. If we support garbage like this, they will continue to rush out these terrible movies hoping that dopes like me will rush out on opening day to see them. We need to send a message. I know they made the entire investment back the first weekend, but good god almighty.

Holy Crap, this movie , if you can call it a movie, because its running time is a awful 68 minutes , don't be fooled , this is a robbery of your money and time. I can't believe it debuted #1 at the U.S box office. Those people should be ban for life and stop making this so call COMEDIES.(Date movie was just as bad) First: the leading actors, wow, they are so bad its not even funny, you don't like then and they have not one comic bone in their bodies. Second: the spoofs are so badly made , and are thrown at you like a piece of "pie" at your face, and they say "take it you morons, this is funny", well i think not. Third: you can't make fun of Jack Sparrow, he is possibly the greatest movie character of this decade, so spare me please. Don't watch it, and if your life depend it on it, then just kill your self!!!!!!!

Epic Movie makes the otherwise dreadful Date Movie look like it has all the wit of a Marx brothers film. I choose to watch this, I will NOT dignify it by calling it a film as I don't want to sully the word, this thing out of morbid curiosity at just how bad a bottom 100 rated thing on IMDb could possibly be. I was not ready for this inept 'spoof' film that is cringe-worthily unfunny The lame pansy ass shots at movies actually spells out what the spoof they're doing is from!!! So it's not only vastly unfunny, it also treats the audience like some severely mentally retarded sloths (which, I'll concede, is in likelihood the coveted demographic they're going after). EVERYone involved in this soul-sucking piece of rancid dog feces should not only be deeply deeply ashamed of themselves, but should actually be sentenced to do community service of some kind. I think it's current standing of 43rd worst thing of all time is actually way to optimistic, as it's not one of, but THE worst supposed comedy I've EVER seen in my life. Trust me I've seen a lot and suffered through many a bad film. But in all sincerity this thing is as painful an experience as having a gravel enema, while your eyes are held open by rusty priors forced to see grandma provide fellatio to a sickly dog who gets so exited his bowels go and he defecates in a baby sister's mouth which she gulps down with delight. No wait, this is worse MUCH MUCH worse. Now i'm not a movie snob in the least. my tastes range from Shawshank redemption to Polyester. From Die Hard to The Toxic Avenger. I love spoof films like Airplane, Naked Gun, Kentucky Fried Movie and Scary Movie (the first one).But I sincerely do NOT want to meet anyone who even chuckled once at this abomination. It's utterly and supremely horrid in every single conceivable way, from the wanna-be Anna Farris, Jayma Mays to the proof that Kal Penn in Harold and Kumar was his highest achievement in life to the brain numbingly so called 'spoofs'. David Carridine, do you need the money THIS badly? Carmen Elektra, what in the hell were they holding over your head?? must have been supremely embarrassing indeed as you were married to Rodman. Fred Willard, where the hell did your career go??? Poor poor Kevin "Kids in the Hall" McDonald how could you slum this badly?? Lastly (and i DO mean lastly) to Jason Friedberg & Aaron Seltzer: How can you hate all of humanity with such a passion as to inflict these travesties on us. Every single film you've done thus far, and likely in the future, is complete and utter sh*#. You've totally bypassed other horrible incompetent film makers as Uwe Boll, and others that names escape me at the moment. You're both the worst.

My Grade: F

Yes, I knew it would be stupid. But stupid CAN be funny. I won't go into depth about just how stupid and unfunny it was; i don't want to restate the obvious. The snake is eating its own tail when it comes to these spoofs. However, there are some things I expected to get from this movie other than laughs:

1. Impersonations of at least "Saturday Night Live" quality (not that that's asking too much). -Um. No. This movie even made Darrell Hammond look like an amateur (and I think he's a pretty gifted comedian). What the heck was up with 'Samuel L. Jackson'?

2. Topicality. The previews showed scenes borrowed from some pretty recent flicks. -Er... Punk'd? Scarface? 'I just saved money on my car insurance'? What, no Tom Cruise jumping on a couch?

3. Touchstone cameos by 'real' celebrities, ala Dr. Phil in Scary Movie 4. -Nope. Nada. Zilch. Unless you count Crispin Glover doing a bad Johnny Depp doing a bad Johnny De... wait, see, I told you these spoofs were eating their tails.

4. Alright, I'll admit it, I expected LAUGHS. STUPID laughs, but SOMETHING!!!! Where there ANY laughs? -I did chuckle at some of Jayma Mays' (Lucy) reactions. I'd like to see her in another movie. Any other movie. Any OTHER movie.

Okay, I've officially wasted enough of my life on this stupid, pointless, sub-Date Movie flick. I resolve never to speak of it again.

I saw this in the theater and absolutely loathed it. In retrospect, it...is still a horrible movie. I am still very shocked that I didn't walk out of it.

The previews can lead people like myself on - I'm into any kind of humor, whether it be slapstick, vulgar, refined, immature, or just a cheesy movie. Epic Movie failed horribly at any of this, and didn't even make me smile. I think my favorite part, and the best parody was the Queen's MySpace, only because I have a strong dislike for that website, and it captured so many pages I've seen far too well...

So anyway, it's a large disappointment, as the last Scary Movies/as Date Movie has been; looked funny from the outside, terrible when actually seen. The writers could have done better than to string poorly done, over-used, unfunny jokes together for a...SHORT film, may I call it! Fair enough if you're making a long movie, I can see it a little hard to make every joke good. But this wasn't even a long movie - and not even one joke was funny. Sheesh. Why didn't we trade our tickets.

The seconds you see in the commercial will be the only amusing parts, and is that really worth your five dollars? Go rent a movie or go see something else. Seriously. Sorry if this seemed like a rant, but you're better off.