Five Across the Eyes

Um... Okay, I guess I get the whole shaky-cam, gorilla-style filming technique but unfortunately I think a gorilla could have made a better movie... This thing was just a complete mess from the get go. Bad acting, bad directing, bad story and horrific cinematography. How this piece of garbage was released I will never know, but it has and unfortunately I watched it. Filmed on location in Tennessee by the directing team of Greg Swinson and Ryan Thiessen (Harry and Lloyd), "Five Across The Eyes" I'm assuming is supposed to resemble a "Blair Witch" type film but falls short... Okay it nose dives off a cliff. I was actually embarrassed for these young women, whom I'm sure were promised Hollywood stardom, but ended up in this dung heap. The dialog is ridiculous, and actually aggravates you as you listen to it. How this is supposed to be a horror flick is another mystery, as there is nothing even remotely scary about it, except for the fact that I watched it... Try this one on for size: There is 5 of you and 1 of her, do the math and beat her ass... "The End". Saddly it went on (and on) for 95 more minutes of mind-numbing stupidity...

I saw it for free, and wanted my money back.

The teenagers Isabella (Sandra Paduch), Jamie (Danielle Lilley), Melanie (Mia Yi), Caroline (Angela Brunda) and Stephanie (Jennifer Barnett) are lost in a shortcut they took in their way back home. The inexperienced Bell is driving her mother's van and is worried about the late hour. The quintet decides to stop in an isolated store to ask for directions, and Bell accidentally bumps one headlight of a parked SUV. The girls decide to leave the place and drive in the dark and lonely road trying to reach the main road. They decide to make a u-turn and they are chased by the driver (Veronica Garcia) of the SUV along a night of terror.

After the idea of "The Blair Witch Project", many filmmakers have found a way of making low-budget movies in a kind of American version of the Dogma 95, some of them engaging like the Spanish "REC" but most of them complete failures.

"Five across the Eyes" is completely amateurish film and debut of the directors, writers, cast and crew and uses the same style, with hand held camera, poor lighting and few locations. The hysteric girls are annoying, screaming and crying along the 95 minutes running time. Further, they have unreasonable silly behavior along the most loneliness road of the world, giving the chance of a maniac killer attacks them several times. This film is painful to watch, with the excessive sadism and violence, and should be shorter and shorter. The only consolation is that I have seen films worse than this one, reason for my rating. My vote is two.

Title (Brazil): "Através dos Olhos" ("Through the Eyes")

This movie has many problem associated with it that makes it come off like a low budget class project from someone in film school. I have to give it credit on its campiness though. Many times throughout the movie I found myself laughing hysterically. It was so bad at times that it was comical, which made it a fun watch.

If you're looking for a low-grade slasher movie with a twist of psychological horror and a dash of campy ridiculousness, then pop a bowl of popcorn, invite some friends over, and have some fun.

I agree with other comments that the sound is very bad. Dialog is next to impossible to follow much of the time and the soundtrack is kind of just there.

Do not waste your time watching this! Unless you want to study it for all the wrong things you shouldn't do to make a good film. I am not one to usually review a movie, but this one is personal. I wasted precious time which they cannot give back. I feel compelled to write this report to warn others not to waste their time watching this crap. If this was a student project, i would have to say not bad, but only for the first 15 min... after that it gets annoying. the screaming, the bad audio, the bad video (a good camera man could have made it much better). and yes, whats with the Blair-Witch effect? no budget? I was hoping it was going to get better, but it doesn't. Now how the hell did it deserves a 4? 2 is more fair but 1 for wasting my time! I have said my peace.

This really is the most dreadful film I have ever seen. I simply have no idea how anyone has the audacity to put this on release.

The production standards are atrocious. There is no pretence here at cinematography. The camera work, scripting, acting and sound are unbelievably crass. I think there is a plot, but it could have been done in 10 minutes sparing us the time to watch it. The hysterical neurotic girls at the centre of this piece have no credibility whatsoever.

I would urge anyone to avoid spending any time or money on this Title. It is truly atrocious.

JDD - 14 December 2008