Red Billabong

I'm upset about how bad this movie is. As an Australian I worry for Australian sci-fi. Much like Occupation (2018), that other awful Aussie sci-fi, the cgi and camerawork was good, but the story, and particularly the script, was unnatural and difficult to bear. Red Billabong may have worked if this were about a reunion of two estranged brothers (no unexplained horror). Or, Red Billabong may have worked if this were solely about two brothers, not estranged, battling an unexplained horror. I'm not kidding, the mish mash of two estranged brothers battling each other and an unexplained horror was just plain irritating. The theme may sound familiar, and others may argue that relationship colour alongside adversity is a common and highly popular theme. I'll grant that, but for me, it seemed that the script had been written by a 13 year old with no real experience of what he/she was writing about. I'm not kidding, there are unrealistic stereotypes, sexism, male bitchiness, horrible initial portraits of young women, loads of cliches, potty mouths throughout, and way too many attempted classic lines. It's awful. At a certain point about 50 mins in a young man with a beanie appears and converses casually with one of the brothers. This beanie guy has appeared from nowhere in the forest, and is not seen again, nor was he seen previously in the movie. I actually clicked on all the pics above to try and figure whom the hell he was! Awful and irritating. Please Australian film, please check your work better!

What begins as a promising premise, and remains so is immediately hampered by Dan Ewing and Tom Pockock's meeting. These ex-"Neighbours/ Home & Away" actors, and I use the term 'actor' loosely, undo any hint at danger in this dreadfully written script. The photography is good, the music quite good, but the 'acting' is absolutely appalling. Seriously, these guys and gals need to take some acting lessons or better still, spend some time on stage in the theater where actors learn how to act, not just pose for the camera. If they are graduates of established drama schools like NIDA or WAPA, then these schools have failed and should be treated as "Soapies feed factories. They sure as Hell don't teach acting skills. Dreadful script predictable to the end; characters so 2D they don't need to open their mouths; acting - just appallingly bad. what an abysmal entry that could have been so much more. Alas, it is a SyFy Channel movie transplanted to Australia at best. To think Dan Ewing is considered "an up and coming star". If he is, we're in trouble. He cannot, I repeat cannot act to save himself....or indeed this film.

It was one of the worst things "not just movie" I've ever seen. How this movie has got a rating of 6.5 is beyond me!! I don't want to waste any extra words on this shitty movie but because it is compulsory to write a minimum of 10 lines I would have to apologize for the following.

Awful Awful Awful.

I beg of you if you are reading this review not to waste two hours of your life watching this movie.

I don't normally write reviews but I feel it is my social duty to try and warn as many people as I can from watching this horrid thing.

How stupid can you be, I mean, promoting this flick via reviews, common you can see where you're living and it's Australia. Guess the production has written all over IMDb. But I thought to give it a try.

The first thing I noticed is that this horror clocks in at almost 2 hours. That's long so you have to give the viewer a lot to keep him attracted to the screen. And it's there things go wrong. After 1 hour the only thing you see are two red spots in the woods, a lot of noises but not in the style of Blair Witch that doesn't deliver the heebie-jeebies. So in the first hour you will meet Rebecca (Jessica Green) the slut of the gang seducing everybody but even there it goes wrong. The focus lays on her voluptuous juggs but honest. Walking around in your bikini in the woods, how stupid and making love with your bra one, just dump the b*tch.

And oi far I have been writing about everything except the fact that this should be a horror. It's in the last 50 minutes the possessed eyes come in as did the monster. For a minute. I get it, this is more an action thriller in stead of a horror. But even there it lacks action...just the last 20 minutes this action turns into a CGI horror.

Gore 0/5 Nudity 0/5 Effects 2/5 Story 2/5 Comedy 0/5

I had high hopes of this flick as Australian creature features of the past such as rogue and razorback were well constructed. This however fell dry and flat with scheduled cliché Aussie songs and slang sayings. The generic character stereotypes were spot on the money for this sort of movie however they were mostly all overacted and generally unbelievable at best. as a fond fan of the horror genre this movie seemed to cross over to the action genre after approximately 50 minutes of boring character building. There were no scare scenes nor shock factor moments. There were no real comedic moments which are usually familiar within Australian films however I did find myself having a giggle at the terrible creature effects and the unrealistic script. The one star for this movie is attributed to the stunning Queensland scenery and most of the outdoor backdrop shots. To conclude, this could have been an extended episode of home and away which may have had a better reception among those viewers.