Simon Helberg credited as playing...
Howard Wolowitz
- Mark Hamill: Thank you so much for finding this guy. Oh, my goodness. Hey, Bark. How are you, buddy?
- Howard Wolowitz: Y-Your dog's name is Bark?
- Mark Hamill: Yeah.
- Howard Wolowitz: Bark Hamill?
- Mark Hamill: Yeah. Well, I let the fans name him online. I got lucky, though. He was almost Honey Baked Hamill. Anyway, thank you so much. I-I want to give you a reward for finding him.
- Howard Wolowitz: Oh, no, I couldn't take your money. It's just an honor to meet you.
- Mark Hamill: No. No, please. You don't know what this dog means to me, and I thought he was gone for good. Please? There must be something I can do for you. Anything.
- Howard Wolowitz: Oh, you're gonna regret that.
- Stuart Bloom: Hey, dude.
- Denise: Dude?
- Stuart Bloom: Yeah, you know, just want you to know that I don't think of you as a woman.
- Denise: Oh, perfect. I don't think of you as a man.
- Stuart Bloom: Great. So, as two genderless blobs of human flesh, how would you like to go to Sheldon and Amy's wedding with me?
- Denise: Oh, Stuart. Look, I appreciate that, but it just might be a little weird, considering you're my boss.
- Howard Wolowitz: [entering] Guess who's gonna officiate Sheldon and Amy's wedding! Mark Hamill! Luke Skywalker is gonna be at the wedding!
- Denise: [to Stuart] You'll need to buy me a dress.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: What the hell is that?
- Howard Wolowitz: Come on, you know this one. It's a... dog. I found him in the back yard. Don't worry, I already called the owner.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: Good, 'cause we don't need a dog. We already have two babies, you and Stuart.
- Howard Wolowitz: [the doorbell rings] That's probably him.
- [opening the door, he's stunned to see Mark Hamill]
- Mark Hamill: Hi.
- Howard Wolowitz: I'm gonna need a minute.
- [he shuts the door]
- Howard Wolowitz: [in a high-pitched fanboy shriek] That's Mark Hamill!
- Howard Wolowitz: Hey, uh, the bride and groom seem to be running a little behind. Do you think you could stall?
- Mark Hamill: Stall? How?
- Howard Wolowitz: Hey, everybody! Uh, it's gonna be a few more minutes, but while we wait, does anyone have any questions about "Star Wars"?
- [a good majority of the wedding guests raise their hands]
- Howard Wolowitz: You got this.
- Penny Hofstadter: Now, we got a lot of family coming in tomorrow. I'm gonna need everyone's help. Think of this as one of your comic book movies. There's a bunch of superheroes, each with a different task.
- Raj Koothrappali: Oh, like the new "Avengers".
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: Which one was that?
- Howard Wolowitz: The one you slept through last weekend.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: [fondly] Oh, that was a good nap.
- Howard Wolowitz: Welcome, Bert. Don't you look nice.
- Bert Kibbler: Yeah. Like a geode, I clean up good.
- Howard Wolowitz: Don't you crack a geode open?
- Bert Kibbler: It's not a perfect metaphor.
- Raj Koothrappali: [seeing Mark Hamill] What is he doing here?
- Howard Wolowitz: I found his dog and guilted him into officiating the wedding. Don't tell Sheldon. It's a surprise.
- Raj Koothrappali: Wait, I-I thought Wil was officiating the wedding.
- Howard Wolowitz: Yeah, so did he.
- Raj Koothrappali: How did he take the news?
- Howard Wolowitz: I'll let you know.
- Raj Koothrappali: Oh, my god. Is that Mark Hamill?
- Howard Wolowitz: Yeah.
- Bert Kibbler: Oh, my god. Is that...
- Raj Koothrappali: [cutting him off] Bert, go find your seat!