Living Counter Cultural: Femininity

Popular culture has a decidedly feminist bent.

 Recent movies, tv shows and prominent women

 are displaying heroins as 

 tough, 

calloused, 

superior cutthroats. 

 Current cultural trends are directly opposing anything close to Biblical standards.

I hope you realize this and are not one of the many frogs sitting placidly in a pot set to boil. 

 The darkness of sin and evil are sweeping across our nation

at a frightening and sickening pace.

A thinking woman must wonder;  what can I possibly do about it?

You can be a city set on a hill...

just by being who God created you to be.

In this day and age, trying to uphold a biblical standard of femininity will indeed 

set you apart.

When was the last time you saw a woman who looked lovely?

How about watched a mother tenderly communicating to a child?

Have you recently noticed a young girl dressed in  a sweet and wholesome way?

I am sure it wasn't in Walmart.  

Sadly, these are not things we see evident in our society today.

Being a woman created by God is such a privilege.

The gift of our femininity is something we can give both to ourselves and those around us.

I believe that our society is hungering to be transformed by the

 loveliness

 and grace

 of Biblical femininity.....they just don't know it, 

and are looking for everything else to satisfy this thirst.

What better antidote to a violent and pain filled culture

 than warm

 and gentle

feminine strength?

What better cure for poverty and filth

than a love of beauty and a confidence

in one's ability to make things lovely?

What better hope for the future than a

nurturing mother's heart that is

 more concerned for the next generation

than its own selfish desires?

All these qualities:

gentle strength,

love of beauty,

care and nurturing,

 are part of the essence of femininity.

 

As Emily Barnes says so aptly in her book, The Heart of Loveliness: 

 "To me a godly woman is one who possesses inner peace and tranquility; 

 she doesn't have to prove herself to anyone.  

She is strong, and yet she does not use her strength to control or dominate people,

 neither does she depend on recognition from others.

  Hers is an inner contentment and satisfaction based not on accomplishments, position, or authority,

but on a deep awareness of God's eternal and personal love for her. 

 That kind of inner peace, strength confidence and tranquility comes from depending on God; 

 drawing on His wisdom and strength,

 learning to be like Him."  

When this happens in our lives, 

we gradually grow free of anxious competitiveness and aggressiveness.

  We no longer need to prove our worth and value

 because we now how much we are worth in God's sight... 

and then, we are free to reach out in love to others.

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornments such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes, instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight."

1 Peter 3:3,4 

As we set forth to cultivate femininity in our homes, 

let us think not only of ourselves, but of the darkness of the nation creeping in around us.

We are, in part, the answer..

for as we shine forth God's truth, acted out in our lives,

 we will be like a city set on a hill.  

For darkness does not take away light, but only deepens as the light grows dim. 

 Stand strong, therefore, Biblical women,

 and let your light shine.

Vintage Family: In The Cold of Winter

 Home should always be a retreat for the soul,

 filled with uplifting beauty 

and the shelter of each other.

 As the temperatures drop outdoors,

all things Hygge flourish within our cabin walls.

  We are folks who adore bad weather.

  Life below zero is another wonderful excuse to nestle in a cozy blanket,

 hearty mugs of tea in hand, 

and enjoy the pleasure of reading aloud to the family an extra chapter or two. 

The sweetly cheerful scene of children engrossed in a good book, 

lunch bubbling away on the cook stove,

 an abundance of wool clothing displayed 

provides a wonderful sense of tranquility 

that floods my soul on these quiet, albeit cold days of winter, 

and never ceases to make me smile.

We try to keep life simple

 by making home a refuge and retreat for the soul,  

and forging a homelife filled with all that is good and inspiring and invigorating.

 These old fashioned ideals have found a comfortable place in our midst.      

I think the enduring classics of family life are the table, 

order in daily life, 

and reading aloud together. 

 The mainstay of this vintage family is our faith.

Our ever present standby to a vintage family life is valuing what we have.  

I have found that having a functional and nurturing routine helps keep us all moving forward together and helps to limit the chaos of family life. 

 By a nurturing routine,

 I mean one that invites warmth and a sense of belonging.

 The act of lighting candles quiets and warms a room, immediately bringing life.

 I always light a candle at the table before a meal, 

and another one gracing the coffee table in the living room each morning.

Candles are *my one weakness.* 

As we gather at the table for meals,

 and this act is so very important, even for those pb & j lunches, 

we have opportunity to inspire, encourage, uplift our family,

 and give them a sense of belonging to something greater than self-

of being part of a whole,

 and of being missed if they are not occupying their place.

The table too can be a tender place, 

holding a trove of treasures, not just for the appetite, but for the soul.

  By giving thanks, another old timey tradition, 

we take a moment to open eyes and heart wide to the beauty in everyday life.  

Each day is a gift,  and to me, it should be treated as such.

It is the consistency of these little moments, 

added up, that have the most value.

The power of routine

 is that it takes us the places we most want to go, need to go..

especially when our will power wanes, we weary and are tempted to slack.

  Routine, softer and more flexible than scheduling, gives us a gentle road map for our day.

It also provides us a time and place to nurture in the midst of school, lessons, 

and all we have going on a daily basis.

Our daily routine takes us thru morning time, schooling and then lunch.

  Afterward, a ramble through the woods, 

tea time, 

more reading aloud...

because...is there any better way to gather children up than a candle, a hot drink, and a good story? 

 I think not. 

 This tradition is the quintessential mark of our home life. 

 The power of a good story shared fosters kinship, at the very least.

 My most brilliant piece of parenting advice is such: 

 read aloud to your children every chance you get.

Any time of day, reading aloud fits the mark.

Before school?  What better way to inspire them to be on time for breakfast,

 than a fabulous story read aloud to them as they eat each morning?

Light a candle, ring a bell instead of yelling that breakfast is ready.

 Smile.

There is a favorite saying  that goes:

"Life is like a cup of tea...it's all in how you make it."

 I ache for the homes aplenty that have no sense of life giving in  them, 

where the mamas dread each day, each task, 

as if raising children well is not the most essential thing a body can do. 

Want a beautiful life?  Make one.

It can be done.

  It should be done.

There is a great sense of joy and peace that comes

 from the immense effort it takes to create and carry out

 a home life that is intentional about 

invigorating people to live heaven on earth.

I believe it is what we were made to do, 

which is why it is such a satisfying work.

Sally Clarkson put it well when she stated that,

 "Where there is vision for building godly generations in the home, 

there is God's grace and energy for the task."

Twilight fades, lights dim, bringing forth the hush of evening. 

(praise the Lord, how I need it!) 

A fresh snowfall kindles all the elements of winter comforts;

 flannel, a blazing fire, comfort food, and don't forget wool socks.... 

and we, being pulled snugly around the table once again

bow our heads as Father prays...

just like in the good old days.

Beauty in Daily Living

Today may seem like an ordinary day.

  We get up, we eat breakfast, we do chores, then schooling, lunch, followed by free time,

 then naps and more schooling, dinner, stories and bedtime.

 Seems normal and plain enough.

  However, one of the things I like to do the most in my homemaking 

is create something beautiful and lovely out of the mundane.

Ordinary days like today can be as meaningful and beautiful as the special occasions in our lives,

 it just takes some ingenuity (or copy-catting, *which is absolutely fine*) 

and deliberate planning. 

 The results are well worth it.

In her highly influential book, Living a Beautiful Life, Alexandra Stoddard says, 

" Making daily tasks into times of enrichment 

through planning 

and special personal details

 is a way to live a richer, more satisfying life."

I do believe that is a very Biblical principle to live by 

if it does not require self absorption or materialism to be achieved. 

 God is the designer of beauty. 

 He created this incredible world for us to enjoy, 

and though for believers, it may not be our ultimate "home"

 there is no reason we should not mimic God in his creating beauty and order,

 using great creativity cultivating a wondrous abode for our family. 

 He did, so should we.

There is great power in the little things-
joyful acts of love that enrich and ennoble our lives.  

The question is, what little things?

What little thing(s) could be done as we get up?

  As we eat breakfast?

How about chores?

  and so on. 

 Think it through. 

 I would love, love, love to hear your ideas!

Here are a few of mine:

-Snuggles and hot drinks when we get up

- Singing and sharing what we are thankful for at meals

- Playing classical music during housecleaning

- Adding an essential oil, such as lavender to the dish water

- Praying for the one whose clothes you are ironing

- Setting a beautiful table for dinner

- Light candles

- Sing to the children before naps

- Read aloud to the family before bed

Rituals such as these enable you to

 enjoy the ordinary more deeply
as you flow through the day. 

 Think then, not just of everyday, but also of the weekends. 

 Weekends too, are made extra special by adding thoughtful rituals.

  At our house, the children sleep in on Saturday.  

They get up leisurely and listen to Moody radio while mama fixes a large brunch. 

 After extended housecleaning chores are done ( O glory!)

 they are free to play/watch a movie.

 Sunday then, we take for rest. 

 Rest from our regular daily life. 

 Sunday naps for all, a day off from laundry and housework, 

 and time to fellowship with others, make it a day set apart from all others. 

The usual Sunday pot roast awaiting us when we arrive home from church is an awesome weekend marvel.  One can smell it the moment they step out of the van...

mouths are watering fiercely by the time we are in the door.

Monthly rituals are harder to plan for in our busy lives,

 but, like daily rituals, greatly enriching and worth it.

A once a month trip to the big town with my husband for groceries and such is a necessity,

 but we have made it a habit to stop by a favored coffee shop each trip

 to just sit and relax and visit over a hot drink. 

 On this trip, too, we often listen to an audio broadcast sermon of some sort, 

usually chosen by content to some personal current interest. 

 Another wonderful  ritual for me, is the once a month overnighter at nanny's,

 where all the children have a day and a half to spend with their grandma at her house...

leaving mama home...alone.  

  Mama's day off.

  Boy, this is a life saver of a day and a half for me! 

 Sunday afternoon the children leave, and I typically have a long nap, a walk, 

and read something just for fun, then close the day with dinner and a movie with my handsome husband. 

 The next day, I sleep in as late as I can, 

then go visiting or sew or some other such crafty thing. 

 By the end of the day I am refreshed and longing for my children to arrive safely home.

"In a culture that richly rewards achievements 
and accomplishment, 

it is left to us to create a balanced life, to master the art of creating a life worth living." 

 -Wally Arnold, Illiminations

Managing a home and mothering is much more than surviving life in the trenches.

When we apply those nourishing touches that come
from deep within a woman's soul,
we warm not only our family's souls,
but our own as well.

Here's to drinking deeply of God's great love,

until our cup is running over,

 and living beautifully this holiday season. 

Blessings to you this day,

Julianne

Savoring Saturdays

Autumn rains pouring forth outdoors,
wood fire crackling inside,
the lodge is hushed from the usual comradere of littles,
  and the clamor of a big household.
 I adore Saturdays.
 This is the day of the week I often look forward to the most.
 The day where my cozy, nesty side comes out
and gets to putter about, which I find romantic.

First of all, I love Saturdays because it is a great opportunity to pamper my family a bit.
The children get to sleep in.
This means a quiet, slow morning for me,
(and Olivia, who is always my alarm clock being the morning person she is).
The boys awaken to the weekly radio programs at Moody Radio,
 which they listen to in their room
while I make the children a big ol breakfast full of scrumptious yummies
to celebrate the arrival of the weekend.
We have worked hard all week,
and today is a special day
unlike the other weekdays.

I take great comfort in this a weekly ritual.
It is something to look forward to.
We are creating something special and beautiful out of the ordinary.
I like that.

Few things in life give me more pleasure than setting a nice table for my family,
and filling it with homemade food.

My boys think hashbrowns or fried potatoes are one of the most marvelous of foods.
Therefore, each Saturday breakfast will be slightly different, but always contain potatoes.
This week, a hearty  skillet breakfast and fresh milk for starters.

Today my pampering included Doughnuts...hot from the oven.
They are incredibly easy to make and have fast become a favorite in our home.
First the dough.

Then the frying.

 Next the glaze.

  At last into mouths!

The little ones have their own Saturday rituals as well.
 We have a special music CD they only listen to this day.
 It is full of Sunday School songs and Bible Club songs like we sang when I was growing up.
 They start their day dancing.
 They sing.

  They play dress up.
They take turns hiding.
They sense this is a special play day, and make the most of it.

The second reason I love Saturdays is this:
After breakfasting, each child  is given a housecleaning chore.
 Saturdays are for housecleaning,
 and we all work together to get the job done.
 By each one taking a chore, we get the majority of the work done in around an hour.
  This day, Rose and Caleb cleaned the kitchen,
 Joe folded and put away the laundry...which had been stacking up on the couch upstairs..
so quite a pile for him!
 Jim vacuumed the rugs and helped Ben with the bathrooms.
 Bethany, Gabe and even Olivia get in the spirit
and help wash surfaces such as the frig, dining chairs, doors and door handles, light switches.
  I sweep and mop.
Then go about finishing my list;
 washing windows, dusting, changing beds, tidying surfaces,
setting out a different table centerpiece, rearranging this and that,
what I call puttering.

This again is one reason I love Saturdays.
The house getting clean and tidy,
 restored to order and thus beautified,
  a marvelous part of homemaking that I take great joy in.
Making a clean and lovely home for my family is giving (it, the home) life.
It is this spirit of a home that the wife and mama makes,
filling the house with her own spirit,
 and pouring out a sweet pleasant fragrance,
 which is a ministry to her family and all who enter.

The children, done with their chores, return to their play, or watch a movie,
 leaving me, again, in relative quiet.
Often, I find this the perfect opportunity for that
time alone with God
 that I have been needing.
Time to write in my journal of 1000 gifts,
time to reflect and make sure my heart is right.
Here is my third reason for my love and anticipation of a beautiful Saturday at home,
rarely during the week do I find this kind of time available to me for the taking.
Aaaah, God is good!

The evening is made up of a simple dinner,
 baths for the littles,
clothing laid out and ironed for Sunday,
and all to bed early, so that we are prepared and rested for the Lord's Day.


Here is the why of our Saturday rituals:
It is the way we live each day of our life that make up the tone and color of how we live in this world.
We can make it to be vivid and rich, sweet and pleasant,
 or not.

JR Miller writes it so well,
"What is true of our individual lives is true also of our homes.  
We are making memories day by day and year by year,
 and what they shall be in the future  will depend 
on the home life we are living now."


God created women to give life,
 to be helpmeets,
to nurture,
to imitate Him in beautifying all that is around us.
 When we seek to cultivate these passions He has built in us,
we find that contentment, that peace, that inner joy that delights in the smallest things.
And there, as these aspects grow and flourish,
overflowing from what is in our hearts all along, out to our families,
we live in the beauty of the Lord.

New Tradition for a New Year

We began a new tradition this year at Providence Lodge. 

Wanting to be deliberate about creating a beautiful life for our family,
 Brian and I determined that

a treasure hunt and bonfire, complete with mulled cider and cocoa, 

would be a great way to celebrate the coming New Year.

So we invited over some friends and did just that, 

followed by a potluck and board games inside.

The cider on the BBQ was a huge hit.

It didn't seem to matter that it was 1 degree outside, 

friends had so much fun in the frozen outdoors,

 we did not want the day to end.

Everyone had a good time,
-with the exception of Gabe-
who thought that being trapped in his snow suit 

was some sort of punishment.

(smile)

In the end, it was a super way to start off the New Year.

With Food, Fun, and Fellowship- you just can't go wrong!

I love Traditions!

Blessings to ya all in 2011,

Julianne

Beautiful Rituals

When God made the earth, I am sure he could have done it all in one day. 

I think it is odd that He didn’t, but then an “ah-ha” hit me,

as I went walking with Gabe in the fall sun.

  It is has been cloudy and gloomy all week,

so when the sunshine split through the clouds this afternoon,

we all went on a walk, sickies too. 

I thought the fresh air would be good for them. 

Gabe and I had a wonderful time. 

He had to stomp in every mud puddle he came across.

We do have a tendency to get very excited about sunshine, since it is our power source.

  So we were fully enjoying it, and the thought occurred to me

that God didn’t have to get everything done right now, 

in one day, rush it all through so he could get on to the next project.

  Instead, he took His time,

and enjoyed every minute of it,

for at the end of the day, He proclaimed his work “very good.”

This tells me he was pleased with the day. 

He spoke and carefully, creatively fashioned everything into being, in an orderly way.
So should we. 

When I get up in the morning,

there is no reason to slosh my way through the morning

without paying careful attention to the details of beauty and creativity. 

As the Creator God modeled, I should follow suit in my work. 

This is living fully, beautifully, abundantly. 

Dressing in something feminine and lovely,

regardless of where I am going or not going,

smelling good, fixing my hair the way my husband likes it, 

this is the first step in beautifying my morning.

The thesaurus says that to beautify  is to sanctify, hallow, consecrate and bless. 

Interesting.
My morning rituals include my husband’s fantastic coffee,

talking with my Lord. giving him the day,

dressing, and then facing the household duties. 

These I begin with music by the Josties, which is sweet and uplifts me in my priorities.  

Especially on dark mornings, I light candles.

When I think about uplifting rituals that add beauty to our life, 

my desire is to enhance our home life in a way that does not idolize materialism,

so I look to the Lord, and ask Him for creative solutions. 

Singing at the dinner table,

taking turns listing what we are thankful for that day,

holding hands while joining in prayer, 

reading aloud at bedtime,

taking walks together, 

and relishing the gentle moments throughout the day,

are investing in the richness of the day to me. 

Life is so dear.

I am in the process now of asking my Lord how else I might infuse loveliness into our home.

  I am expectantly awaiting inspiration. 

I have an inkling that whatever it is will revolve around deepening relationships, 

since that is what God is all about. 

He is not all about shopping,

or the gathering of stuff,

but cultivating that which is peaceful in us, 

what  breathes honor and enlivens kindness.

   He is not about how much can I fit into one day,

or in living a mundane, ho hum, ordinary life.

Merely gazing at His creation will tell you that.

  

Just as studying God’s creation uplifts the soul, 

so gazing on all sorts of beauty acts on the soul, 

which was made to thirst for Heaven, the ultimate place of beauty.

“If we take for granted the beauty of God’s magnificent creation,

our lives will be in more poverty for it.”  -My mom

To continue that thought, if we feast upon beauty,

we will enrich and enhance our lives.  

 

My friend, Enola Gay,

has tea every afternoon with her husband when he arrives home from work. 

She makes wonderful tea, serves it with all etiquette,

on china inherited from generations of tea loving women. 

When I visit her, she shares this elegant ritual with me, 

allowing me to join her in a charming moment of beauty.

  This is the Romance of life that I often speak of;

that of making an ordinary occasion splendid by embellishing it with loving care.

 When we ignore these possibilities in our life, 

we make a choice to detain ourselves, or our family, in privation. 

To me, this would include being so preoccupied with getting things done

that I miss the joy of each day, which is the way I used to live.

That lifestyle fosters irritation, frustration, and depression. 

Our world loves the abstract, the ugly, death, the chaotic.. all in rebellion of Who God is. 

We who are devoted to and love God,

should be obvious about embracing beauty, order, harmony, elegance, and joy. 

It should permeate our daily lives and spill over into generosity toward others.

  In short, our lives should be defined by beauty. 

Simply taking time to gaze upon and enjoy the beautiful is a godly thing to do.

“Let the beauty of the Lord be upon us.” Psalm 90:17
I do believe I am liking that verse more and more.

A Candle Lit Evening

Few things in this life are as relaxing and romantic to me

than the soft glow of a candlelit home. 
I recall visiting the home of a dear fiend, who is also off grid,

and upon entering her house one evening,

was awestruck by the warmth, cozy appeal and romantic atmosphere

of her home in candlelight.

Instantly, I was addicted.

After dinner is cleaned up, I like nothing better than to light the candles,

turn off the lights and settle down with a big sigh.
The day’s work is done, 

and soon we will tuck all the children,

whom after the day’s various activities,

are now safely gathered in.

The dim lighting soothes and settles down the children,

usually, unless they get a mind to use the shadows as opportunities

to jump out and scare each other.
(smile)

  But I soon put a hush to that,

drawing out our current read aloud and announcing it is time,

they squirm together on the couch in silent anticipation, eyes big.
 

The world seems a gentler, sweeter place in candlelight.
After the young ones are tucked,
we often sit in the dimness and visit with John,
 review the next day's schedule,
and recount humerous or notorious events of the day.
Perhaps it is just this candle-addict's justification for her habit,
but I believe the candle light uplifts the nurturer in me,
and well, isn't that just completely romantic?
Yes, indeed.