Showing posts with label journaling. Show all posts
Showing posts with label journaling. Show all posts

Thursday, August 8, 2019

Passing of Summer



Last Monday, after almost eight weeks of summer break, I went back to work. In all honesty I was not looking forward to it. The summer had been just too beautiful to say goodbye to these almost carefree weeks easily. But the new school year starts next Wednesday and there is a ton to do in the library before that.

At the beginning of the summer break I had made a list of things I would like to do during those weeks. I was afraid that I would just waste my time and by the end of the break would look back on missed opportunities with a lot of regret.

Instead, I look back on eight delightful and fulfilling weeks - without having touched each and every item on my list.


Hardly a week into my break the Geek and I went to San Jose to meet with Kaefer who was about to buy her very first car, a used VW Golf with a manual transmission. She is so happy about it since it gives her a bit more independence even though she is still riding her bike most of the time.

After this first week of mainly doing nothing I started to "work" on my list. I spent a day in Sonoma where I visited the mission and the old barracks;



I spent a morning in the beautiful lavender gardens of a winery:


Many mornings I took long walks around my beloved lake;


I re-discovered the laguna with its interesting plants, crooked trees and beautiful birds (can you see the California Quail?);


And I walked along the beach, something I do way too seldom even though the ocean always calms me and gives me inner peace.


Kaefer came home for the Fourth of July week since this was the only week she didn't have to work (she had started her summer job right after finals in June). We didn't do much - once we went champagne tasting (she turned 21 in April), but apart from that we just hang out, watching British mystery shows, playing games and drinking traditional German Erdbeerbowle.




I spent a lot of time reading and knitting (this is the start of a little dress for our newest family member in Turkey) and I even painted a bit!



Before the summer I got back into the habit of journaling. I had lost my ability to write my journal after the fires and I couldn't find a way back to it. It seemed like something was completely blocked in me. I hated it. Over winter break I had taken a free writing class which was like a little teaser; it motivated me to take a more in-depth writing class in the spring and it eventually helped me to get back into writing my journal. This is one of the things that makes me unbelievably happy.


I said one of the things... the other is photography. Somehow - even though I was still photographing a lot - I had lost my "flow" with photography. Sure, I still took a lot of pictures, mainly with my phone (I got a new phone this year with an excellent camera which is wonderful but also involves the risk of becoming lazy), but it wasn't the same passion. However, I have experienced these "waves" more than once during the more than four decades of photographing, so I wasn't too worried; but I did want to find my old passion again.

And I did. Since I spent so much time on my own this summer I could right dive back into my photography and I enjoyed it so much. I tried different takes of the same motif and it felt so darn good. I don't know WHY photography makes me so incredibly happy, I only know that it DOES.



The last weekend in July the Geek and I spent in Gualala, just two hours up north from where we live, at the coast. I had rented a cabin that was in the redwoods, but right across the water - we could hear the ocean on our little deck. We enjoyed sunsets over the ocean, walked on the cliffs, ate (too much) peanut butter cheesecake and just delighted in the beautiful scenery.





During my last week of break I wanted to have one more day at the ocean and went down to the Point Reyes National Seashore where I walked out on the spit and back along Limantour Beach. It was one of those typical Northern California summer days - sunny and warm, even hot, but the moment you come to the beach fog envelopes you and the temperature drops by 20 degrees. Ah, Northern California, how much I love it!


And then break was almost over - one last Sunday spent in San Francisco with our favorite girl. We spent several hours in the Exploratorium (I hadn't been there since they had moved to Pier 15 from their old location at the Palace of Arts), rode the historical streetcar of the F Line, ate fish and chips near Fisherman's Wharf and walked along Crissy Field Beach.


It was a beautiful summer.




Thursday, July 14, 2011

Journals, Journals, Journals


When I was younger - in my twenties and thirties - I used to write a lot. I had dozens of little journals that I filled up in no time, pouring my heart into those pages. They were my lifesavers on my travels and when I lived abroad, the place where I would keep all the new impressions. These writings especially are wonderful records of places far away and I am glad that I have them. But I also wrote short stories, poems and something that I called "sketches", many of them unfinished, some of them worked over again and again.


Where has all that gone?

Since the birth of my daughter I haven't written into my journal on a regular basis as I used to. I only write fiercely when we are traveling in order to keep these memories. But where is all the heart wrenching? The truly honest moments when I wrote EVERYTHING down, knowing that this was for my eyes only. It always felt so good to write, problems got sorted out eventually, questions answered, inspiration hit.

Why did I stop?

I honestly don't know. But I feel inside me that I need to get back to writing, that I WANT to. I love writing my blog, but it is not my language. I need the pouring out, when my thoughts are way quicker than my pen (I always write with fast pens), when everything inside me just spills out without any order - and this I need to do in my own language. The language I grew up with, the language that still best reflects my emotions, the language with all these beautiful, poetic words - German. I love English, but German is the language of my heart.

So I decided to do the morning pages, as so well presented in Julia Cameron's "The Artist Way". Kaefer and I went to Target yesterday because I remembered having seen some beautiful journals there. And yes, they still were there. All kinds of journals, actually. They had them in packs of three and individual ones. Kaefer fell in love with the spiral notebook to the left. Both of us couldn't resist the small journals; she chose the one with the birds. I went for the pack of three beautiful composition books - just perfect for the morning pages.


This morning I started with the morning pages. I woke up with the word "wistful" in my mind - what a source for morning pages! No wonder I had filled my three pages within twenty minutes! Later I still had time to write into my regular journal - the one where I can play with words, write in both English and German (sometimes in the same sentence) and think before (!) I write. Two very different kinds of journals - and both just right for me.

The small journal? That will be turned into a gratitude journal. I take so much in my life for granted without saying thanks although I feel the gratitude, that I thought I want to write down what I am thankful for. I got the idea from my blogging friend Honey - thank you, Honey!

What about you? Do you keep a journal? Do you write morning pages?

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