Ultimate Origins #1 - Michael Turner variant

When I first mentioned the variant cover for ULTIMATE ORIGINS #1, I cracked that I'd have a hard time deciding between the Simone Bianchi cover and the Turner variant. Which is because I am decidedly not a Turner fan.
Since then, I've seen the Turner variant...

Holy Moley!! I had to check the signature to make sure that was really by Turner. That's hot!
Turner's women are usually drawn skraggly and anorexic looking. But -- woo!

Titans (whatever) #1

TITANS #1

written by Judd Winick
art by Ian Churchill & Norm Rapmund

Okay...
When this book was first announced I was kind of excited. I mean, THE NEW TEEN TITANS has always been one of my all-time favorite comics. I love these characters and having them come back together was just too much to ask. Even though the previous TITANS revival kinda fell apart, I still wanted to love that one, too.
Judd Winick wasn't really a stumbling block for me. I know a lot of people on the internet seem to hate him, but he's written some good stuff (GREEN ARROW/BLACK CANARY, the first couple years of THE OUTSIDERS) along with the bad (TITANS/YOUNG JUSTICE: GRADUATION DAY, TITANS EAST SPECTACULAR). So, I wasn't too worried.
Ian Churchill's art on the other hand had me a little trepidatious. I just don't get it most of the time. He can draw a pretty man on occassion, but on the whole it just does nothing for me. But I read the interviews, and Winick seemed like he was excited and got the group. So I thought it might me all right.
I guess I was kinda wrong. This book just doesn't make any sense. I could go into more detail, but Troy Brownfield over at Newsarama has pretty much taken all the words out of my mouth.
Go read his review and then come on back. I'll wait.

Hmm, hmmm. La la la la...

Oh, hi! Okay: First of all, I don't hate it quite that much. But it's close.
What is the timeline on this thing? Are they all attacked at once? They couldn't get ahold of Dick to let him know what was happening, because his comm was cut while he was fighting. And how long was his fight that they got ahold of Batman and he got to Dick before Dick was done? Or did the other attacks happen before Dick's? And how did they get away.
Especially Donna. She was out in space with Kyle, gets attacked by some tentacle thing, and then has time to get free, come back to earth and change clothes. All the while that Dick is running around with glass sticking out of his neck. !!??? And where did Kyle go? He was a Titan once. He did get attacked same time as Donna. Were they just like "Okay, see ya later!" !!???
About the only thing I didn't hate that most people seem to have a problem with is the return of Trigon. I love him. I hope he turns out to be cool. But really, this should have been a lot more Raven oriented for Trigon's return...
All in all, there were some highlights in the artwork :). However if these weren't my favorite characters, I probably wouldn't be back. But I have to keep reading to see if maybe it gets better. Please.

And now for something completely different: Here's a review of the book from an alternate universe. I really, truly cannot believe we read the same book. I so wish I could love it as much as this guy did.

BLAZE BARTON and the Tentacles of Doom!

Here's an irresistible golden-age classic! Well, probably not a classic. But who can resist a story that's only 4-pages long where the hero is ensnared in tentacles on every page and by the end of the story loses his shirt!!!

Ah, to be a young boy during the golden-age of comics!!

Blaze Barton travels to the Dark Side of the Moon in HIT COMICS #12 (June 1941).
written by ?; art by Maurice Gutwirth.

It's cute (on page 4) how he gets so into playing with the tentacles that he completely loses track of the girl he's trying to rescue. Guess a guy's got to have his priorities!!

You can download HIT COMICS #12 and lots of other awesome golden-age goodness from Golden Age Comics Downloads!

Samson and David ... Boys will be Boys

Golden-age homoerotica at it's finest:

FANTASTIC COMICS 10. SEPTEMBER 1940 The cover reads: "SAMSON gripped the gangster pilot with one mighty arm, And with the other..." Well, look what he has in his other hand. What do you think he did next...?	FANTASTIC COMICS 11. OCTOBER 1940 Samson wrecks the torture machine with a "mighty blow." Kinda looks like the guy he's rescuing has a mighty blow on his mind as well...
FANTASTIC COMICS 16. MARCH 1941 The cover reads: "The mighty SAMSON smashes the war-like dictators!" What has that got to do with the cover? I guess it wouldn't have done to say: "David admires the way SAMSON handles large, hard objects!"	SAMSON 6. JUNE 1941 Who says tentacle porn is only for wimmen?