Stop Her Now

No, not Hillary, but Loretta Nall. The woman who innovated that form of terrorism known as political cleavage has struck again. This time she is assaulting Family Values with a new form of IED, the improvised exploding dildo:

The Birmingham News is reporting that Attorney General Troy King might push for tougher anti-obscenity laws in the next legislative session because of a recent court's ruling that the current laws are too vague with regard to Love Stuff, an adult toy shop.

Now, I only have six words to say to AG King about his anti-dildo crusade..FROM MY COLD DEAD FINGERS TROY!!!

I think that Troy may not have any experience with devices used in sexual pleasure, so, I am starting a crusade to introduce Troy King to the fabulous world of ben-wa balls, rubber weiners and pocket tooties. I want to encourage all of my readers to purchase a sex toy of some sort and send it to Alabama Attorney General Troy King.

It's enough to make a girl drop to her knees and pray for Rapture. But then again, any time a woman and her set of cans enters the political sphere, the cost to Freedom is enormous. Praise Him!

(h/t)
[update - Friday a.m. tinkering]

Feeding the Beast

Masturbators, rejoice. "Science" has found a new way for you to skirt Divine retribution for your sinful lifestyle of self-abuse:

Two nutrients found in eggs, spinach and other leafy green vegetables offer some protection against the most common cause of blindness among the elderly, researchers said on Monday.

It certainly explains why every restaurant catering to coastal liberal elites and their ever so "nuanced" palates has Greek omelettes and vegetable fritatas on their breakfast menu. They know that their clientele just worked up a mean hunger violating God's law. Disgraceful!

What infuriates me most about this story is that here is yet another instance where The Left has used my tax dollars to turn the research institutes of Our Nation into a pit crew supporting deviant lifestyles and abhorrent sexual practices. Nearly every university offers a course on the dietary needs of homosexuals and kleptomaniacs, but these same schools recoil in horror from the suggestion of offering a double major in Christian Womanhood and cosmetology quicker than you can "ACLU lawsuit." Discrimination against America's Christians doesn't get much more bald-faced than this, and MSM's predictable silence only compunds this injustice. Until America restores a Republican majority to Congress, we can look forward to more Outrages of this sort. Praise Him!

The silent holocaust

He's got your eyes.

Sister Nancy Beth doffs her habit to Idaho, who joins the growing number of states trying to turn their happy go-lucky tramps into unhappy single mothers. The strategy for doing so is making them view ultrasound pictures of the fruits of their harlotry:

Idaho recently became the ninth state to order doctors to provide abortion-minded women ultrasound images of their preborn child before having the procedure.

The state law, signed by Gov. Butch Otter on March 27, ensures that women have access to as much information about their preborn baby as possible. Experts say providing women with an ultrasound image of their child makes following through with an abortion much less likely.

Bryan Fischer, executive director of the Idaho Values Alliance, explained that the mandate is an amendment to the state’s parental-consent law.

“We think that’s very important medical information for every woman to have in that situation," he said. "Fortunately, our Legislature agreed, and the governor signed it into law.”

It also gives them a sense of the Majesty of the Almighty. Nothing fills teen skanks with Awe for the Glory of Creation like snapshots of their innards. If you really want to turn them into true Christian Patriots, you should show them some footage of Ronald Reagan's colonoscopy while you're at it.

As much as I support this step, I'm afraid it really doesn't go far enough to stop the slaughter of millions of pre-born Americans. Every day, untold numbers of our potential fellow citizens are snuffed out Kleenexes in the wanton act of male masturbation. Liberals and their affiliated pervert interest groups claim that this behavior is protected under the "right" to "privacy." But when you consider the literal ground we are losing to the rabbit-like fertility of illegal immigrants, Muslims, and Mary Cheney, it's time for National Security to trump "civil liberties" for once.

The solution is simple: Every male who is considering masturbating will be required to view magnified images of spermatozoa at a local clinic, while the Mormon Tabernacle Choir's God Bless America plays in the background. He will be sent home with a 4-color brochure explaining the myriad health risks of masturbation (depression, cancer, chafing, calluses). If the man decides he wants to go through with the procedure, a follow-up appointment will be scheduled 24 hours later, at which point he will be provided with latex gloves and a Time-Life book on Papua New Guinea.

As oppressed as men are in Our Nation, they should not view this as further gender-based Persecution at the hand of feminists. Unfortunately, the calculus of reproduction and illegal immigration makes this a national crisis that requires immediate governmental intervention. While a woman who has chosen not to repopulate America with Americans kills just one Ovum-American per month, the average male "session" results in the wholesale slaughter of 250 million Spermatozoa-Americans. To put it in legal terms: It's one count of manslaughter versus one count of genocide.

Studies show that in one week alone, the average 14 year old can offset a year's worth of illegal immigration from the nations of El Salvador and Honduras combined. Please choose Life while keeping America strong by making Our Nation's men informed of the precious cargo inside them. Future generations will thank all of us. Praise Him!