Recently, I saw a mom posted a status in a breastfeeding group asking how to reduce engorgement because her baby just won't latch, even after multiple tries. Apparently, she started bottle feeding her baby as early as day-3 due to jaundice. As a result, now her baby won't take directly from her, because the baby is too comfortable with the fast milk flow coming from the bottle teat.
This reminds me of my very own experience with Aahil, and why reading the post from that mom affected me so much. You see, after getting discharged from SJMC, Aahil's jaundice flared up to 262 on day-6. Considering the fact that SJMC was a little far from our home, we decided to do the treatment at UMRA Hospital, in Seksyen 13 Shah Alam. It was the biggest mistake we've made. For those of you who are expecting and planning to fully breastfeed your baby (successfully), please avoid this hospital at all cost. This post is going to be lengthy, as there were many events that happened (even for a 1 night stay!), so bare with me.
See, before getting admitted to the hospital, we were taken to see this so-called "paediatrician" to assess Aahil's condition. I will never forget her name - but I'll just use her initial for the sake of this post - it's Dr J. During the assessment, not only was she unfriendly, but quite incompetent as a "paediatrician". At first, she was asking us about the standard questions. Then, she asked if I was breastfeeding - I said yes. Then, she asked if I have ever expressed milk out, and what was the volume. I said, I pumped at day-2 and I got almost 2oz. But after weighing Aahil, she said, "See, baby's birth weight was 2.92kg. Now it has dropped to 2.8kg. It shows that your breastmilk is not enough,"
I was speechless. First of all, most of us breastfeeding moms know that 1-2oz is considered normal for the first week of a newborn's life. Secondly, I don't have to be a doctor to know that it is completely normal for newborns to lose 5-10% of his birth weight due to the fluid that he loses after delivery. But even at this point, I didn't really care because:
1) I was equipped with enough information about breastfeeding & breastmilk.
2) All I wanted was the phototherapy treatment for Aahil. The doctor's opinion was irrelevant to me for all I care.
2) All I wanted was the phototherapy treatment for Aahil. The doctor's opinion was irrelevant to me for all I care.
Then, Aahil was sent for treatment. Before the admission, the nurses requested us to bring some pampers for Aahil. I was surprised - don't hospitals normally provide this? Not that it matters, so we supplied them with 10 pcs of pampers as per requested anyway.
I breastfed Aahil once more just before he started the treatment, then left. Before leaving however, I told the nurses that I would be back in 2 hours for the next round of feed. She made a face, but nodded anyway. I left.
After 2 hours, I came back to nurse Aahil and realized that they've bathed and changed Aahil. However, to my surprise, there was NO tag on Aahil other than what's labelled on his trolley. Didn't want to make a scene (because Aahil still needed the treatment), I asked my husband to get a marker, and marked an "A" at the bottom of Aahil's feet. After all the backpains and hardwork in the labor room, I wasn't going to take any chances and mistake my baby with someone elses!
After I was done nursing Aahil, I left and again told the nurse I will be back again in 2 hours, but this time, one of them told me that it wasn't necessary for this troublesome trips, and asked me to supply them with EBM instead. This is when everything started.
I asked them, what was their feeding method? They said "bottle". Immediately I was turned off by the idea, knowing very well a newborn that young shouldn't be introduced to teat bottle for feeding in order not to confuse him with breastfeeding. So I asked if it would be possible for them to feed the baby with a cup, spoon or syringe even - they said no (to all of the options), because they were afraid it would.. choke the baby. (????) I figured they were just lazy, but I kept quiet and told them gently that in that case, I will come to feed Aahil directly instead, because the baby is too young to take from a bottle and I didn't want him to get nipple confusion. Besides, I needed the stimulation + bonding. But no, they kept insisting anyway and told me that with just a few feeds, there won't be any nipple confusion. They were very pushy, but I put my feet down and insisted to come back anyway because my house really isn't far from the hospital. I left.
Then, when I came back for feeding again, the same thing happens. The nurses kept asking me to leave some EBM for Aahil. One of them even told me, there was a mom who left 5 bottles of EBM for her baby. In my heart, I questioned the motive of her saying that to me? Was it to annoy me? They went on and said they needed to see the amount of milk that goes in the baby to make sure the baby was getting "enough". I told them, I have no problem supplying them with EBM but I do not fancy their feeding method. Then they said, they cannot keep lifting the baby up (for me to feed) because it will disrupt the treatment process (???). (So how do they feed EBM to other babies then? While the babies lying down????) I was getting real annoyed by then but thinking that Aahil would be under their care for treatment, I kept calm and lied to them that I hadn't bought any pump yet, and that I would buy one the first thing in the morning. (At this point, I was adamant to get Aahil out the hospital first thing in the morning).
After I finished feeding, another one of them came to me and asked, "Susu ada ke? Banyak?" I was getting a bit impatient at this point, and snapped "Ya, tengok baju saya ni. Dah lencun," pointing at my milk-soaked shirt. That shut her up, and I knew it was very smug of me of saying that, but I was beginning to feel tired from all the trips, and to be honest, it actually felt good to finally let it out!
Before I left this time, I checked if they had any rooms left for me to room-in but they had none. But that's not the point - they simply didn't want me to come to feed my baby directly! I was wondering why the strange requests over and over again, until I came for feeding late that night again, where my question was finally answered. Believe it or not, I found out ALL 4 NURSES AT THE OUTSIDE COUNTER WERE HAPPILY SLEEPING! (Picture a little blurry because I was walking and trying to act as though I was texting someone)
The 2 nurses INSIDE the nursery were awake, but it doesn't matter - WHY were the rest sleeping? Were they paid to sleep at their job? What if something happened to the nurses inside, and the nurses outside don't realize it? Won't it cause danger to the babies lives??
You have no idea how hard I tried to control my emotion and how much I wanted to take Aahil out from the hospital. But it was 3am then, and Aahil still needed the treatment, so I persevered and waited for morning to come.
The next morning, we came again for feeding at 6am and then again at 9am, while waiting for Aahil's blood test result to come out, but the nurses said it wasn't ready, and that we needed to wait between 12pm-2pm for the result to be ready. We waited and waited and came again at 12pm for feeding, but when we hear no news by 2pm, we started to feel very agitated.
So we drove back to the hospital, and when we reached the nursery, my husband asked the nurse politely for the result, but the nurse simply told us no, the result wasn't out yet. She also asked if we had received any call, but when we said no, she then said "Kalau takde call, takde result lah". She then dismissed us by simply asking us to wait. SUPER RUDE. Husband was getting super agitated by the minute and asked how long more did we need to wait, because we've been waiting since morning! He told the nurse to follow up and check when exactly will the result be out because it was already past 2pm. She made a face but reluctantly went to the back of the nursery to check, anyway.
And what do you know? 5 minutes later, the chief nurse came out - WITH A RESULT IN HER HANDS! Apparently they've already had the results since 1pm but the freaking rude nurse earlier was too lazy to check! Husband got super, super angry at this point and asked to get Aahil out immediately. The chief nurse informed us that Aahil needed further treatment because his level was "still high". (Actually it wasn't, the reading has gone down from 262 to 203! At this time I wanted to shove the result into their faces to prove that you do NOT need to feed baby with EBM to ensure he is well fed). But as I said, we were adamant to take Aahil out the next day no matter what happens, so we ignored the request and demanded to be discharged immediately. We then brought Aahil back to SJMC, and with that much improvement, the Doctor confirmed that no further treatment was necessary.
Long story cut short, we made a complaint against the UMRA Hospital, spoke to the hospital manager and they apologized over and over again for their incompetency and unprofessionalism. But the damage has been done. It would be the last time for us there -- ever!
See, fortunately for us, we are experienced parents of 3 with (alhamdulillah) sufficient knowledge on areas not just on breastfeeding/breastmilk but also on our rights as patients. What if what happened to us happen to new parents who know nothing right from the start?
1) The doctor would have first discourage/confuse/worry the mom with her remarks on her EBM yield, when actually, she is doing fine!
2) The pressure from the nurses to provide them with EBM would have forced the mom to feed the baby from the bottle, which could possibly lead to nipple confusion!
To end the story, I urge all you parents out there to equip yourself with as much knowledge on breastfeeding as much as possible to save you from unnecessary stress such as this. Know your rights as a parent, and put your feet down when decision needs to be made.
For expecting and new parents out there - please try to avoid bottles and pacifiers until breastfeeding is well established (usually about 4 weeks) and be firm with the decision made! People can say whatever they want to say, but remember - it is YOUR baby, and at the end of the day, it is YOU who will be facing the music. When "noises" come and try to bring you down, remember to stay strong and PERSEVERE, as no one else has the rights to your baby other than you, and your husband, deservingly. That's it.
Other than that, just enjoy the time with your little one, and keep breastfeeding! Happy breastfeeding!
For expecting and new parents out there - please try to avoid bottles and pacifiers until breastfeeding is well established (usually about 4 weeks) and be firm with the decision made! People can say whatever they want to say, but remember - it is YOUR baby, and at the end of the day, it is YOU who will be facing the music. When "noises" come and try to bring you down, remember to stay strong and PERSEVERE, as no one else has the rights to your baby other than you, and your husband, deservingly. That's it.
Other than that, just enjoy the time with your little one, and keep breastfeeding! Happy breastfeeding!