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“No one doubts you constantly do your best. We all admire you so much for how hard you work. But some days, your best can be a B, and some days your best can even be a C, or some days, it could mean doing nothing at all but just breathing.”
Mazey Eddings, A Brush with Love
“I think about your brain constantly,' he continued, his eyes piercing into hers. 'It fascinates me to no end. I want to know every corner of it, learn the secret colours of your thoughts. I'd do anything for a map of it.”
Mazey Eddings, Lizzie Blake's Best Mistake
“Do you know what a honey mushroom is?" she blurted out, plucking at the hairs on his arm, which was wrapped around her.
He was silent for a moment before letting out a husky laugh "No. Why?"
"It's the largest living thing on earth. Larger than trees, elephants, whales-this one living thing takes up over three square miles in Oregon." She could almost feel him turning that random fact over in his brain. She was glad she wasn't facing him. This would be so much harder if she had to look into his eyes instead of at the wall.
"Like the mushroom cap is over three miles across?" he asked.
Harper shook her head. "No, no. That's the amazing part. When you look at it-the part you see aboveground-it's this tiny little mushroom head. It looks so insignificant. They just pop up here and there" she gestures with her fingertips as though she could draw them in the air. "But it creates this root-like system called hyphae. And the hyphae-it spreads and grows and, kind of... takes over underground. One living thing, every cell genetically identical, spreading below the surface to take up this enormous amount of space."
Dan was quiet for a moment. "Why are you telling me this?" he asked, placing a kiss into her neck. Harper swallowed and fiddled with the edge of the sheet.
"Because thats' what my anxiety feels like-a honey mushroom." She felt Dan tense behind her, but she pushed on." A lot of times, someone on the outside, like you, maybe, sees these clues to it-my fidgeting, my mind seeming a million miles away, panic attacks. But inside" -she tapped her chest- "it's this intricate network of sharp pain and fear that's constantly growing and pulsing through me. It's always there, right beneath my skin, huge and controlling, but no one can see it. I just feel it. And it hurts. So badly. It makes me want to curl up into a ball or sprint out of my skeleton. This huge, inescapable thing inside me that controls me." she paused, picking aggressively at her nails; "It feels cruel to have your own body do that to you".”
Mazey Eddings, A Brush with Love
“I'm not looking to fix you," she said, staring straight into his eyes. "I'm here to love you.”
Mazey Eddings, The Plus One
“For anyone who’s been told they’re too loud. Too emotional. Too much. You are the perfect amount of enough”
Mazey Eddings, Lizzie Blake's Best Mistake
“... she decided to be brave. She decided to tear off a corner of her heart, carefully fold it into a tiny paper airplane, and gently toss it at him, letting it glide to a stop at his feet. He could either pick it up or step on it, and she was scared of either option.”
Mazey Eddings, Lizzie Blake's Best Mistake
If yellow was a sound, he thought, it would be her laugh. Bright and booming, warming and joyful. Different varieties ranging from sunbeams and lemon zest to the soft puffs of golden wattle.”
Mazey Eddings, Lizzie Blake's Best Mistake
“I always feel bigger looking up at the stars,” she said, raising her hands, pulling one of his with her, to gesture at the sky as she sought out the words. “It’s like I’m looking up at all the energy that lives inside of me. Like whatever divine being or miracle of science that made all these beautiful stars, also made me. Whatever allows for stars to exist also allows for me to exist. It feels empowering—elevating—to know that I can exist among something so beautiful.”
Mazey Eddings, Lizzie Blake's Best Mistake
“He wasn’t sure why, but something about her made him want to know every vibrant thought that swirled through her colorful mind. She fascinated him in a way no one else ever had before. He wanted to understand her.”
Mazey Eddings, Lizzie Blake's Best Mistake
“Then she smiled back, and it, ever so slightly, tipped Jude’s world upside down”
Mazey Eddings, The Plus One
“But, if ADHD has made me an expert in anything, it’s avoidance, and I am pretending not to see my problems like a champ. Sure, the problems nag and gnaw at the back of my mind, slowly devouring me until I’m nothing but a flesh bag of subconscious anxiety, but it’s better than actively sending myself into a meltdown by imagining literally every single rancid potential outcome.”
Mazey Eddings, Tilly in Technicolor
“You’ll probably never fully grasp how wonderful it is to know a person like you exists.”
Mazey Eddings, Lizzie Blake's Best Mistake
“...everything about it is an uphill battle. But you get up. Over and over. Just to take another punch. Another hit. [...] But when you get up, that one final time, battered and bloody and not sure you can take one more blow, it teaches you how to heal. And then you go out, and heal others.”
Mazey Eddings, A Brush with Love
“You don’t understand what a privilege it is to know you,” he said, whispering the words into the shell of her ear. “You don’t understand how it changes a person to hear you laugh.”
Mazey Eddings, Lizzie Blake's Best Mistake
“Couples that stim together stay together.”
Mazey Eddings, Tilly in Technicolor
“You’re allowed to be broken,” she said, taking his hands and kissing his knuckles. “And you’re allowed to be repaired. I love every piece of you and however they fit together.”
Mazey Eddings, The Plus One
“I don’t think you break things, Lizzie,” he said after a few minutes. She let out a disbelieving snort. “I really don’t. I think you make things better. A lot better.”
Mazey Eddings, Lizzie Blake's Best Mistake
“I'd rather give it my all and come up short than not try at all.”
Mazey Eddings, Tilly in Technicolor
“For anyone who’s been told they’re too loud. Too emotional. Too much. You are the perfect amount of enough.”
Mazey Eddings, Lizzie Blake's Best Mistake
“and he was getting really good at not feeling anything most of the time. Except for when he felt everything.”
Mazey Eddings, The Plus One
“I’m the tide and she’s the moon; I go wherever she wants me.”
Mazey Eddings, Tilly in Technicolor
“But you better keep Harper's name out of your fucking mouth or I will personally come to your house and feed your blond head up your asshole and make you tell me how it tastes.”
Mazey Eddings, A Brush with Love
“You can hurt and also be loved. You can feel sadness and also laugh and feel joy. Good emotions can coexist with hard ones. You can struggle and suffer and learn to heal while you also love.”
Mazey Eddings, The Plus One
“the start of liking someone can be so overwhelming it feels a bit like you're dying. But that's only because you're on the precipice of really living”
Mazey Eddings, Tilly in Technicolor
“Your brain was built different and that’s beautiful, never a burden.”
Mazey Eddings, Lizzie Blake's Best Mistake
“This is my future. My now. This moment. in a blink, will be my past.”
Mazey Eddings, Tilly in Technicolor
“Maturity is a social construct upheld by the patriarchy with an incredibly narrow, white, cis, neurotypical scope to enforce conformity and then implemented as an othering and shaming tactic for anyone that steps outside of that paradigm.”
Mazey Eddings, The Plus One
“I love you without conditions. Without expectations.”
Mazey Eddings, Tilly in Technicolor
tags: love
“A hundred good ideas or absolutely none, you add value just by being you.”
Mazey Eddings, Tilly in Technicolor
“She was a dream and a nightmare and Jude couldn't believe he was lucky enough to have her in his room.”
Mazey Eddings, The Plus One

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